Yams, fertile feckers and what not to say.

[LimpLettice]

Part the third:

Welcome all anti-fertile fuckers! This is our clique for those trying longer than 6 cycles and are pretty fed up.

Here are our Fucked Off TTC Commandments

• Thou shall not arrive one day and post BFP next day
• Thou shall not give advice to other when TTC for one month only
• Thou shall not participate in one-up-manship and realise TTC is shit for everyone in different ways
• Thou shall allow posters to be fucked off with the world and everything in it at regular points in the month
• Thou shall not be offended by strong language
• Thou shall not tell everyone to eat yams
• Thou shall accept being called a muppet for testing at 7dpo at 9pm at night

Our spreadsheet which includes what supplements (and potatoes) we are trying in our journey to motherhood.

AF just arrived, explains the 367893 celebrations I stuffed down my neck today! Lots of this weekend. I’ve got one more shot at a 2017 bfp then I’m headed to the gp. Fuck it all to fuckdom!!!

Welcome, @WonkyDonk87.

Ah, @RhiBee29, I was really rooting for you to have a bfp, sorry to hear af got you instead. I hope you enjoyed the 367893 Celebrations, though; I might have to go and buy some tomorrow now. I think I have a Weight Watchers chocolate biscuit somewhere. It's not quite the same, is it?

I have still not had a positive opk, although all today's (that sounds bad - it's only three!) have dried nearly as dark as the control line. I think we'll dtd again tonight anyway, but it's lucky I bought a pack of 50 ic's so I can keep testing every day for the next 20 or so if need be!

I am being ridiculously hopeful: if I was ov'ing today then a bfp could be due on DH's birthday, which would be wonderful...our 12-week scan was booked for his birthday so this would be something positive for the day.

Hello to all the newbs, be grumpy, sweary, angry but friendly and you'll have found your new home.

I'm due to ov this weekend. This cycle still seems super long. I've counted up the projection on the app twice incase it's buggered after my mc but it seems about on track so I guess it's defaulted back to my pre miscarriage cycle.

I am boring myself at the moment.

Thanks for the welcome @RhiBee29 - ditto on the unwelcome arrival of AF.... way ahead of you on the 🍷😏

soz thanks for the welcome @SoozC and @Si1ver* x

Thank you all for the lovely welcomes ladies 💕
Cheers 🍷**@RhiBee29* and @wonkyDonk87*
🤞for positive opks @si1ver and @Soozc & I just love celebrations 🍫🍬and sorry @RhiBee29 abt af showing her ugly fecking head!

Ugh baby bomb on Facebook...got married month after me...it's not a competition it's not a competition it's not a competition it's not a competition and breathe...

Hello wonk :)

Sorry about AF rhi

Fx for you sooz that would be nice timing; nothing wrong with being hopeful - it's nice to see!

silver what day are you on now? Hope things settle down

Ugh, sorry Rhi :(

Good luck, sooz !! That would be such a nice surprise!

And hi to others who are joining :) don't stay long though ;)

I'm currently wondering WTF if up with AF. Monday, browny CM - usually a couple of days before AF arrives. Wednesday, very light pink tinge when wiping, but only once. Today - nothing. Cramping has completely gone... I just want AF to start properly already and stop playing these silly games. Tomorrow will technically make me 2 days late, going by averages, but it could just be a longer than normal cycle. I wish I were more clockwork :(

Tests all negative, so I'm def out still, but just want AF to start.

@lost I’m just catching up and this is exactly how I feel! Damn hope

Oh @sooz that must be so hard, it’s hard enough thinking about it myself without mc grief as well. Sending you a big hug

Hello ladies! 👋

I was really hoping I’d come back from holiday to hear someone + pg news so I’m sorry to read about the af arrivals.

And welcome more newbies! I feel both terrible that you’re here too and relieved you all make me feel normal and not alone.

FW started whilst on holiday but of course I’m due to ov this weekend and OH is away without me. Genius. No pg this year then. Grrrr 😩

I’m reading www.worldofbooks.com/the-essential-fertility-guide-by-robert-winston-gor006983842.html?keyword=&gclid=CjwKCAiA9f7QBRBpEiwApLGUimxoKF6-Vv--oQaMs0FXtdBZKJqcudciHl4f3cOC7PJXOsAhRjv1exoCBMkQAvD_BwE
As per @nimble recommendation so I’m a bit more educated for my FC appoint on 12th Dec.

Oh, link didn’t work!

Welcome to all newbies! Really struggling this month - just shit that this is the last month this year to see a BFP! Really thought I would be pregnant at Christmas. I have NO idea what my cycle is doing, so at least I don't have the TWW wait as such.

More baby scan pictures on Facebook
And more lovely 'family photos' from an old uni friend who does everything the 'hippy mummy' way

I feel like such a horrible person, but that's how I feel. It's not nice at all...

My best friend sent me a photo via WhatsApp of her baby who is now about a month old. I'll be seeing him at Christmas time.
I'll also be spending Christmas Day with DP's family and his 2 and a half year old niece and 8 month old nephew. I'm not sure how I'm going to cope!

You're all so strong

The annoying thing is we're doing everything right, well following the 'rules'.
I'm ovulating around day 14/15 each month, my cycle is around 27-30 days. We've been dtd lots and I've even been putting my legs up afterwards to help them stay in!

I take opks, I take pre natal vitamins everyday...I could do with losing some weight, but what more can we do? Probably loads.

I'm getting some of that pre seed next month and DP is starting to eat more healthily and drink less coffee. He's a big coffee addict! He takes zinc and vitamin d.

@sponge it’s so frustrating when it seems like you’re doing everything right but it still doesn’t happen. I tried legs up and a tampon after (tmi) but still nothing. Then I read a book that said that was totally crap and the sperm either swim through or don’t regardless of where your legs are!!

@LovePinaColada I love deadlines like that. They make such a nice wooshing noise as they go past. I thought I'd definitely be pregnant by last Christmas, by my 37th birthday cos that's over a year trying, Summer this year then, Christmas? Bueller? Anyone?

@SpongeCake23 drink heavily. That's my usual plan for events with small babies.

Positive opk! So blazing positive, makes a mockery of all my squinting and sighing and Googling over the other, now clearly negative, tests this past week. I haven't used them for so long, I'd forgotten how obvious a positive can be!

Dtd Monday, Wednesday and today. Can't ask for more, it's now in the hands of the gods!

@Spongecake23, we love preseed, I find the applicators very easy to use and good both internally and as a lube.
On Christmas Day, maybe book in a time just for you and DP to go for a walk or something that's not with the baby. It'll give you chance to charge your happiness batteries, IYKWIM.

@LovePinaColada, totally agree with deadlines - there are too many in the year and each time it's a sad reminder. If I'm not preggers by Christmas then I'm going to mark each one by doing something nice for myself; massage, buy some clothes, visit to see friends.

Yay Sooz! Get shagging haha, good luck!

Okay TMI right now. Af technically finished Wednesday. I say finished as in there wasn’t enough coming out to wear my mooncup so I didn’t bother. I do usually get a tiny bit of brown spotting a day or so after af but not enough to even wear a pad.
Today I was in work and I felt like I’d wet myself so I went into the toilet and there was no bloody toilet roll so had to use my fingers (sorry) just to check what was going on and I had this brown/white discharge but it was really weird. The only way I can describe it is like wallpaper paste in colour and consistency (honestly, I’m so sorry) it was light a clear white if that makes sense but with brown streaks mixed in. I’ve never had this type of cm before. I don’t think it’s thrush or BV, I’ve not got any symptoms or anything. And I’ve had thrush before and the stuff that comes out is more white/yellow and like cottage cheese (lmao okay that’s all for the grossness now) I never get cm after af for at least a week. Has anyone else ever had this after af? It’s just really odd :/

Sounds like fertile cm bubble - have you started EPO or omega 3?

It’s not stretchy like ewcm, it’s kind of pasty/clumpy but it doesn’t look or feel like I’ve got an infection or anything. I literally just came off af on Wednesday (I don’t count my spotting as af because there’s so little of it) so I’m only cd5, I’ve not started taking any vitamins or anything. It’s odd, I’ve never had it before. Obviously I know I’m not pregnant as I just had a period, just when I think I’m getting to grips with what my body is doing month to month, something seems to pop up and confuse me all over again!

Hi Bubble - try not to worry too much, like you say there’s no sign of infection. Our down-there’s do all sorts to keep it ‘tidy’ after AF, perhaps it’s a final thrust of clearing out ready for a fresh new cycle?

Talking to DH today about how I could be pregnant again right now. He said "It's a shame something doesn't happen the moment you get pregnant, like one of your ears flashing blue. Or maybe a voice in your head".

I think this thread is rubbing off on him...!

Hi ladies, can I join?

I'm 33, DH is 30 and we've been TTC #1 for 10 months now with no hint of a BFP and I'm thoroughly fucked off with the whole thing!

We've tried OPKs, temping, PreSeed & every vitamin & supplement known to man

DH's SA was great, my FSH & LH tests on CD3 were normal, CD21 bloods showed ovulation and my (delightful) internal scan was also normal...according to the fertility nurse at our appointment yesterday we are 'unexplained' and should try and relax (resisted the urge to call her out on the relax bullshit but barely!)

Next step is an HSG and then we'll be referred to the fertility clinic

Just emotionally exhausted by the whole process tbh