TTC after pregnancy loss - Love is the Drug - and lots of vitamins - thread 14

[TheGrumpySquirrel]

Shiny new thread. Hugs and supportive chat for those TTC after miscarriage or pregnancy loss ♥️

Hello zoo

How exciting Kerryleanne really crossing everything for you. It must feel quite strange seeing those follicles on the scan.

Sparkle it's great you're making some progress on your treatment plan.

Stowie you have to come back and tell us your fortune. How apt going on halloween!

Unicorns and Fillybee all best wishes for the scan countdown.

We lost the will to shag from CD14 onwards so I'm really hoping that I ov'd by then. More boring TWW.... Very busy in work which is good at times because it keeps the reptile anxious brain busy. Drinking every day though, not sure I can give up right now

Thanks for the reassurance and welcome @Purplepjs @Flatwhite32 @Martydog. And I’m so sorry you all find yourselves here. This was my first pregnancy and I (perhaps naively) thought that having seen a heartbeat at 7+3, I was virtually in the clear.

@Fillybee Don’t worry, Google has been stressing me out more! The doctor said (I think, because I probably wasn’t listening properly as it’s so much to take in), that if nothing happens in 12 hours, I’d need a second dose of meds.

I was borderline for being allowed medical management (something about sac size?) but very much hoping tomorrow does the trick. My bf wants to take me on holiday next week which the doctor seemed to think was a good idea - provided I don’t swim. Haven’t quite worked out how my boss is going to take to that idea...

On the plus side, I’m enjoying a very large glass of wine!

I’m keeping my fingers crossed for all those with scans coming up. Totally with you on the “need to know ASAP if everything’s okay”, with no faffing about any “magical” nonsense.

@Zoo33 we saw our baby's heartbeat at 8 weeks and it was perfect, but sadly the 12 week scan showed that the baby had died at 9 weeks, or just over. It's so heartbreaking. If you don't mind me asking, how far along were you? We went on holiday less than 48 hours after my ERPC (our holiday was already booked) and although I found it hard, it was better than staying at home.

@Flatwhite32 I was 9+2 when I found out. Baby was only measuring 8+3, so had died a week after my early scan. I’m so glad I had that scan and saw the heartbeat for that brief moment, but I felt a bit like I’d been lulled into a false sense of security, although I guess nobody sees these things coming.

I think the idea of staying at home is horrible - at least if I’m away I don’t have to go to work!

It must have been awful knowing the baby had died 3 weeks before - I can’t imagine how that feels. 1 week is bad enough. So much for missed miscarriages being rare. Thanks for the FB group heads up. I’ll probably join once this is over - I’m hoping I’ll be able to start moving on after tomorrow, being stuck in limbo is awful.

@Zoo33 I'm usually opposed to people using Drs notes when not needed, but screw it. If you feel comfortable to do so then try and get signed off for a bit. The next few days will be draining enough as it is without trying to get back to normal asap. Take some time for your mental health to go away and look after yourself.

And i don't think it's naive. Looking back, Maybe, but I think a good portion of us looked at the statistics week by week and thought we'd be okay or we were overreacting with our worries.

I'm so sorry you find yourself here. We're all trying to muddle along, however successfully that is, but we will be around for you too :)

Thanks @UnicornsandRainbows1 Muddling along together is probably keeping us all semi sane! I gather you have a scan coming up - I hope it goes well. May I ask how long it’s been since you started trying again?

I haven’t decided how to tackle the holiday - I’m also anti using doctors notes where not absolutely necessary, so I might take annual leave on the basis that I’ll go in on Friday (if not on Thursday) to help pack up my desk for the office move. Being in might help, who knows. Sitting at home certainly isn’t helping...

We’d be going diving (might as well seeing as I’m not forbidden due to pregnancy), so I’ll have to do so in a dry suit - post miscarriage bleeding and sharks probably don’t mix!!

@Zoo33 I'm honestly not sure where I would be now without this thread. Sounds weird as we're all basically strangers!

No not at all! Well I had my mmc in July and needed surgery as my body couldn't seem to detach much. So, I think since the beginning of August when the bleeding stopped (honestly I was so desperate for a baby again and craved closeness with my husband and to actually feel like person). So yeah ever since then, but it took a couple of moths of breakthrough bleeding and a normal ovulation date to get here. It doesn't seem like a long time, and it isn't, but it felt like a lifetime ago. Atm I have to keep telling myself that I'm not 12 weeks anymore because I keep reverting back to that. Oh and yeah we've booked a private scan for Friday morning. I'm very, very wary.

That's fair enough. Just try to take the recovery process day by day and don't make solid plans as such. So for Thursday put it as a maybe if you feel up for it. There's nothing worse than feeling horrible and then flaking even if you don't mean to. I think it's a process where you have to be very open-minded and flexible unfortunately.

Eep that's not a good mix!

Thanks @UnicornsandRainbows1. I reckon it’s because we’re strangers that we can open up. A couple of people know about my mmc (immediate family only so far, plus my boss), but being able to open up to strangers like this feels cleansing. I think sometimes we just need someone to listen and understand, which not everyone does.

A couple of months isn’t long but I bet it felt like a lifetime. I was lucky in getting pregnant 3 months after coming off the pill - but again it felt like a very long time as every period felt like a failure (even though I’m pretty sure I didn’t actually ovulate until August, which is when I caught). I’m hopeful it won’t take long to get pregnant again but I know things don’t always work that way. Positive thoughts...

@Zoo33 If it helps (I'm very fortunate and know it's just luck of the draw really) it took me 3 months coming off the implant and technically 3 months this time (I think). Pretty sure I didn't ovulate before this time after the mc. Just pace yourself and take it week by week

Well fillybee ‘real’ I guess but I doubt it will happen to me... I would LOVE bogof babies but I doubt I’m that lucky!

It’s my third iui, the nhs here does them before giving you one IVF. I have been injecting follicle stimulating hormones every day too which is why my ovaries are ‘fit to burst’ according to the nurse

Welcome zoo - I’m sorry that you have to be here

@KerryLeanne84 I’m sorry, but bogof babies had me sniggering for the first time in days! Thank you.

Thank you all for your messages ❤️ We are both really looking forward to continue our journey (with a clean slate) all of the waiting & limbo has had the biggest impact on us both especially emotionally! Knowing that a skin tag (polyp) has held us up for nearly a year has been frustrating & upsetting especially when we’re being told everything else looks great & we’ve got spontaneously pregnant (that’s what they call it) 3 times! We at least now have direction & I’m one of those people (like most of us) if I know what’s happening I can handle it!

Kerry- good luck with the iui, I hope & prey all goes well for you ❤️

Unicorns & filly- I so hope your scans are wonderful for you & cant wait to hear your news❤️

Zoo- so sorry for your loss this group of ladies are the best & agree it’s great to express with people who know where your coming from, I hope all goes well for you❤️

I would love to hear from the ladies who started this thread❤️ Would be lovely to hear how you are doing??

@zoo33 aw glad to hear it! 🌈

Thinking of you today @Zoo33. Xx

So sorry you've had to join us Zoo

zoo so sorry for your loss, Thinking of you xxx

Well ladies, today is the day I find out if I’m joining you all again.....
I have my follow up scan from last weeks “not so great”’one.
We are hoping for a heartbeat but I’m really not very hopeful I have to say....
Wish me luck

Oh weasle, thinking of you, with everything crossed. Sending a hug x

I really hope everything has improved weasledee

Weaseldee-thinking of you ❤️❤️

Really really hoping for good news for you @weasledee xxx

Goodluck! lots of love and positive vibes xx

Weasledee hoping that it's good news, thinking of you in this horrible anxious time

Well ladies, looks like I’ll be joining you in the future, well maybe?
Scan showed no progression from last week, so having surgery to remove what’s there by the end of the week. As I said before this ttc and then pregnancy is not for the faint hearted!
Big question now is, do we call it a day?! Going to give ourselves a break till Christmas at least.....
But I’m staying with the group so I can hear about your BFP’s! x