Thread 31, TTC1 | Jam and her dodgers still riding the bonking bus for that elusive BFP

[Jamon]

Calling all OPK-ers, Temp-ers, Clomid-ers, Femara-ers, IUI-ers, IVF-ers and anyone else on the TTC #1 Bus.

We've been going a while now so the novelty has well and truly worn off and we're slightly battle scarred and bruised in the cervix area. We don't get a lot of baby dust in these here parts, we just keep it legs spread and fingers crossed (LSFX). We love a baby bomb from a prior bus-mate but if we get told to 'just relax and enjoy it' ONE MORE TIME you will get a punch in the face!

Hop on board, post your stats and prepare to be dazzled by the wealth of TTC knowledge we long-timeys have to share...

Key:
HS - have/had sex
GOS - good old shag
ELH - enthusiastic lavatory happenings
LSFX - legs spread, fingers crossed

Evening ladies. What is it with DH and them having a wobble recently?? Guess what, mine did it today!!! Normally he is absolutely a diamond perfect husband. He hasn't grieved at all since our loss and I know this. He's finding distractions.

Last night he came home from rehearsals with his band and had a massive "I'm not good enough" wobble of self doubt. I'm not being bias but he's a bloody amazing musician and extremely talented. But he's a nice guy, big teddy bear who wears his heart on his sleeve and he doesn't see his own worth. He got very upset and then today text me saying he's really down.

I'm literally keeping my head above water and he's stressing about things that don't need to be thought about. I gave him a huge prep talk, built him up and reminded him about the important things. I felt like shit afterwards like I'd just given him my last bit of happy juice.

So I grabbed a massage slot at work, got elbowed in the back, and felt a little better. Tonight I've come home late, grabbed some tea and baked a cake for my godson. I feel much better.

This happened last cycle when he had a wobble about pizza. Right smack bang in my fertile week. Sabotage. I swear it!!

McTufty - no hot baths, don't want to boil your eggs!!

Basset urgh please have lots of compensation foods. Are your meds working? Did you have symptoms before?

Quiet same goes for you that I said to sk1p. I can happily lend you some of my BMI, free to keep too. 😊

Harriet please do it and report back!! We need details about the weird stuff too. I remember a good thread about symptom spotting and one lady said her bits tingled when she thought about being pregnant. 😂

Jam Ivf goal is in touching distance, FX!!

Katie sorry about AF. I don't think my mum meant to be unhelpful. She tried for a long time for both me and my sister. Trust this though, the last thing you ever want to hear your mum say is "just lay back and don't think about it" 😐🤢

Kwick WTF DID I MISS YOUR 25th BIRTHDAY!!!!! ARGH!!!! Happy birthday doll. 😘😜🤓

You also make me want to swap my lunch salads for soups with your womble voodoo. 🤔

Ha mouse and kath well my "symptom" is not exotic - I've had AF style cramping all day today. I've had it before when pregnant, but also had it last cycle so I know it doesn't mean anything.

Apparently the steroids mask pregnancy symptoms anyway so there's prob nothing to spot even if I wanted to.

kwick I'm basically living on salads right now and had a bath the other day...uh oh!

Ooh that's interesting re steroids harriet, I hadn't realised that (and have been told I'll need them during IVF). Good to know! FX that the cramping is a good sign, you so deserve some good news.

Glad you're feeling better this evening Mouse, you and DH sound like you have such a great relationship though.

Sorry about AF basset, hope the pain isn't too bad tomorrow

PS quiet, no need to apologise! I know that being underweight can be just has difficult as having a few pounds to drop.

I've just ordered the Wizard of OZ book collection because I want to read them to my children one day.

God, I must be fucking nuts.

Thanks for the welcomes... Just heading to bed. CD3 so hoping AF goes away soon.

I have kind of given up avoiding things in TWW, though I don't get crazy drunk. I love chicken liver pâté sooo much, can't wait for the day when I'm "not allowed" it.

Sk1pper you will read those books, you could even read them to a newborn.

Looks like a few people here arriving at IVF around the same time, I haven't told my work so I think the logistics will be fun. DH said I might get a BFP before then but I think I'm too cynical now, though of course I'd love for him to be right. I can add it to the very short list of times he was Right.

Is it too late to join?

Age 31
TTC #1
Cycle 9
Diagnosed with hypothyroidism and started taking 50mcg of Synthroid in May, TSH level now at 1.24 (ideal for conception).

Always has regular alternating 27 and 29 day cycles.

Had an HSG as I was worried about problems caused by a botched abortion 11 years ago but both tubes were clear.

Husband had a sperm count and results were normal even after having then-undiagnosed pneumonia at the time.

Tried multivitamins, evening primrose oil, Sperm Meets Egg plan.

No longer temping or tracking CM or doing OPKs as it was driving me crazy.

Fingers crossed for this month for all x

Bassett - sorry your cramping feels awful, I only drink a cup of caffeine a day now because it can worsen period pain. Have you tried organic decaf, sometimes my body thinks it's getting the shot of caffeine it needs when I drink that - I guess because it links the flavour and smell with a boost.

Baguette - yeah you're right

Never too late Harry, I've also given up all the faffing too. I realised if it hasn't helped for 2 years, its miraculously not going to help now.

I THINK I may have ovulated. Temp rises the last two days. Bare in mind my temps still look like a seismic chart it's small progress. Lol 😂

Also, make up sex is great. DH got home late last night and we said sorry in the best way possible. 🤓

It will be good to have some IVF buddies... although hopefully we won't get there. I've given up hope too that it will happen naturally

Baguette I'm quite lucky as my boss has actually been through IVF - she had three rounds before having her daughter. I also have another colleague going through it in the next couple of months. I think it is definitely doable without telling anyone - the difficulty is the unpredictable nature / changes of date.

Men eh...maybe being in denial is their way of coping...

Hi harry - welcome!

Good to hear tests have come back OK and thyroid getting under control - hope that means things are looking up.

Can see why others prefer to keep track, but also think will drop the clowning around as think am relatively regular - plus short-ish cycles make it seem never-ending...

Can I be nosey and ask where you were told about the ideal TSH conception levels? (Sorry to those who heard me ask on last thread :))

And thanks kath and mouse!

Ha mouse just saw your post - nice one

Struggle I'm with kath - normal life continues for me in TWW. I drink less alcohol overall since TTC but will still enjoy a glass of wine or two.

Harriet symptom spotting defo allowed. Yes hopefully DH will have a lightbulb moment but to be honest I don't think that will happen until he holds our baby in his arms

Basset hope AF isn't here or isn't too painful if so. Agree with skipper that decaf coffee helps even as placebo

Excellent work mouse. In all of this shitness one thing I'm determined to hang onto is good sex.

Skipper ordering those books is a lovely thing to do and a nice positive message to your womble. Nice autocorrect to Wimbledon there!

Baguette pretty sure my DH thinks we will get surprise BFP before IVF too. I am very doubtful - all I can seem to think about now is whether IVF will work. And whether or not to tell work also - struggle I know what you mean about the unpredictable nature of it, it will be rather mystifying to my manager - who is new and I am still getting to know. Another bloody difficult result of infertility

Welcome Harry

Welcome Harry, sounds like you've had quite a TTC journey already. Here's hoping it's a smoother path from now.

Good work on the make up sex Mouse!

I don't think I'm going to tell work about IVF; I feel like it would put way too much pressure on it if anyone other than DH knew. That said, I'm lucky because so can generally juggle my own schedule and nobody particularly notices medical appointments etc.

I sympathise kath. I haven't told anyone at work about my mcs/explained why I've had a lot of medical appointments recently. Think our jobs are quite similar - because there is an expectation that I'll be working round the clock I can actually be quite flexible with being physically present in the office 9-5. They definitely get their monies worth from me mind you!

Why will you be on steroids with ivf - is it standard? They do mask symptoms apparently, and have a load of symptoms of their own - lovely.

8dpo today and symptom spot of the day is creamy CM (sorry for the tmi!)

Also has anyone seen the great sperm race? It was on a few years ago but I watched it online last night. Fascinating but a little depressing in that it makes conceiving look just so bloody hard (as we all know it is)

Yup, it's exactly the same here re work harriet. I work until midnight enough times to not feel bad about skipping off to medical appointments. I've been told I'll need steroids because I have existing auto immune conditions, it's not necessarily to help any pregnancy (but imagine they might do that) but to prevent the hormones involved from causing a flare up of the underlying stuff. Or at least that's the theory I think...

Do you normally get creamy CM at this stage? So hoping it's a good sign for you!

Shes arrived with a vengeance today. skipper i am on the decaf by order of my endocrinologist. This af feels and is behaving how I remember it being before the pill so hopefully in an absolutely miserable way my decreasing t4 is putting my cycle back to normal. The painful periods are a lovely hand me down from my mum.

Fx to all of those fwing and twwing at the moment.

Welcome Harry,

Sorry about the wobbly DH, mouse, though great about the makeup sex. ;D What was the pizza story??

Harriet, and all TWWers, it's so frustrating how literally every symptom could be one or the other outcome. Ah, Schroedinger's Wait....

I agree about The Great Sperm Race, though it also made me feel better about not getting a BFP right away! I mean, look, there's little warriors attacking the sperm on a giant ladder! (Lol!) TLDR: conception is a tiny miracle!

Afternoon ladies,

So much to catch up on so I'll just say hope all the TWWers are managing to remain calm and the FWers have their legs in the air.

Think the only recentvictim of AF is Basset so for you. Hopefully your levels continue to improve.

Happy very belated birthday Kwick

On the BMI subject, I'm another one that seems to have a rather high BMI for how I look.... mine is 26 but I'd say I'm pretty tall and slim if I do say so myself, must be heading into FW with images of myself like that but I do a lot of swimming and other exercise so wonder if its muscle? 26 is OK for treatment but I'd like to be in the healthy range!

I've also seen the Great Sperm Race and made DH watch it about 6/7 months ago to explain why things weren't happening. It is very interesting and makes you think that conception is a proper miracle. Now worried that DH thinks our version is full of deformed sperm

No idea what I'll do about working if/when we end up seeking treatment but think I'll probably have to tell them in some way, shape or form. I could probably get off with not telling my line manager as she doesn't sit near me but I sit right beside the manager that dictates my day to day work so I'd have to tell him - happily I think he'd be totally fine and probably be very matter of a fact about it all.

I'm on the holiday countdown - last day at work today and then we fly out early Saturday morning. Actually cannot wait and just going to try to forget about TTC as much as possible, plenty eating and drinking and being myself - rather than a crazy sub-fertile person.
Once I get back, I'm going to focus on getting myself healthy and hopefully our first appointment will be in September.

Ugh sorry basset is extra shit when you can't indulge too. Maybe a small

I saw the sperm race thingy a while back, it does seem a bloody miracle it ever happens. Fango was referred to as the Hunger Games last time it came up here.

QuietTime I know doctors say you should wait until you have been trying for a full year before you seek help, but we were worried that we might be wasting precious time, so we decided to go to a private fertility clinic for tests since it was covered by our health insurance from work.

Anyway I had a blood test which showed that my TSH (thryoid stimulating hormone) was at 4.85, indicating mild hypothyroidism. That actually explained a lot. I'd had all the symptoms - tired and cold all the time, hair falling out, unable to lose weight - for years. The doctor said that my level would be OK if I wasn't trying for a baby but for conception they prefer it to be between 1 and 2. Higher TSH levels can make your cycles irregular, prevent you from ovulating, and increase the risk of miscarriage. They can also affect your baby's development.

After taking Synthroid for a couple of months, my TSH level is now at 1.24. I still don't feel any better, but at least it's one less thing to worry about. In theory, there should be nothing to stop me getting pregnant and having a healthy baby now. Which means I'll be even more disappointed if it doesn't happen this month!

So I was going to change my surname on the land registry records today. After I found the two long and complicated forms I had to fill out and got through half of one (using a step-by-step guide on the internet) I noticed that the second form required a solicitor. A quick google search and yep, seems that most people don't bother with this. I'm now going to make apple and blackberry crumble...well at least I tried.

Skipper this is what I did and it was really simple -

"Taking your husband’s name after marriage: you don’t need to change your name by deed poll to do this, but you do need to send a copy of your marriage certificate to all relevant authorities, such as the DVLA, and your bank – check if the organisation you are contacting requires the original marriage certificate or will accept a copy. You will also need to apply for a new passport."

Sk1pper when we bought our house the solicitor said if we did go and get married there is no need to change it on the deeds etc as your maiden name is still a name you can use. Just take the marriage certificate in when and if you sell the property. Hope that makes sense.

Jam if only! I'm not allowed to drink on the beta blockers 😞 had a dominos instead.