TTC after miscarriage thread #7

[SayItIsntSo1]

Hello,

Starting a new one as we've maxed out the #6 thread.

Hoping MrsY, Brenna, Rose, Legend, Miami, Bertie, Insufficiently and all the others find it!

Let it be our lucky no.7 thread for BFPs

Oh congratulations olivers and all the other bfp's in this thread!

wow congrats olivers what great news!!

Star sorry she was dismissive I think some really don't understand the all consuming fear - but definitely make the most of the counselling line she's given you if you feel like it will help.

Congratulations oliversmummy26. Think we are basically due the exact same time I reckon.. if not within a few days, I mc the 2nd Dec, then must of fell pregnant 2 weeks after as that's when I prob ovulated!! Xx

Congratulations Olivers! That's a good strong line so I'd be assuming 5 weeks + but I think dating from last bleed is sensible for now. I'm never sure of dates because I have irregular cycles (PCOS) and the GP has always said to just use last LMP and it gets adjusted at the 12 week scan. Sometimes they scan you earlier to date the pregnancy if dates are uncertain but only if you could be much further along I think (you could get a private scan in a few weeks).

notparticularly I'm so sorry for your loss and definitely know what you mean about plans you didn't know you had yet. I had a mc at about 9 weeks just before Christmas, the pregnancy was a surprise and we'd only known for a few weeks but I had still unconsciously based all my plans from next summer onwards on having a new baby and now keep catching myself assuming plans that no longer make any sense, then get that sharp stab of sadness when I realise I need to re-think

Congratulations Olivers that's great news!

I've had quite a lot of brown spotting today, some fresh blood and also cramps so I'm pretty certain this one is a non-starter. Would this be classed as a chemical?

olivers, that's such wonderful news! So happy you're happy. Look after yourself x

Af showed this morning, I've been pretty much doubled over with heinous cramps but glad I'm not pg, would have worried after being told to wait for the MMR jab to settle, and glad things are okay. Weird how my cycle may have changed post MMC/MVA after a lifetime of regularity.

I'm focusing on clutching my hot water bottle, chugging the meds and planning to ttc in earnest once this af is over.

Very very glad to have you all here to chat to. Wouldn't wish membership of this club on anyone but it's worth a lot to me to have such kind, thoughtful, brave women who understand it like no one else can. Love to you all x

(Might be slightly high, forgivevtue sentimentality )

Oh emily, I hope not So hope it's nothing and you're okay. How bad are the cramps and how far along do you think you are? Sending you a big hug x

If I date from the medical management then I'm 4+4 so barely anything. The cramps have gone but still spotting, similar to I usually get before AF

I've never had a chemical so I hope someone else can advise better. Have you done another test since the cramping and bleeding started? With my previous early mc, I was a few days late, got a bfp, started bleeding lightly the following day but with no pain, , then had a bfn the next day, bled for 5 days. The doctor I spoke to said it was an early mc, it wasn't like a normal period, hurt less I think but I do have painful periods.

What I've read about chemicals is that you'd know from an early test, before af is due, then af comes anyway. Is that right?

You wouldn't know when you'd definitely have been due as a mc can mess up your cycle for a bit.

This isn't the place where we lob out platitudes, that would be daft after what we've all been through. However, plenty of people have spotting, bleeding, cramps in totally healthy pregnancies and everything proceeds absolutely fine and dandy. You're not very far along so despite the bleeding, if you're still getting decent bfps all could well still be okay.

Sorry to hear you're feeling anxious, emily, but I agree with Anne that it could be anything. I had early spotting and cramping in both the pregnancy that ended with DD and the one that ended in mmc. In fact, symptoms were the same throughout the first nine weeks, and only a couple of days before the ultrasound where we discovered that the baby had stopped developing, was I having a slight suspicion that something was a bit off. I guess at the point where you are now, the only thing that might give a hint of whether things are ok would be blood tests to find out whether the HCG is rising. I did that with DD, and it helped me feel better (for about two days, haha). FX for you!

And congrats to you Olivers (and sorry for you previous loss). There is a lot of comfort to be found in the fact that a new BFP can occur at such a pace!

wanderinglost: exactly that! Plans that no longer make sense, and then sadness following. I caught myself thinking that now I don't need to think about flying restrictions during the summer, and then, pang, feeling really really sad about it. Strange things.

Thank you for the words of encouragement Anne and notparticularly. Anne you are right that I have no idea when AF would have been due. That's what was making me wonder if this would be considered a chemical. Haven't done another test yet. I think I'll leave it a couple of days and then test. Unless the spotting progresses to more of a bleed in which case I'll probably test in a week or so.

Ultimately what will be will be and things I imagine things will get clearer with time. Thank you for all the support ladies.

Also, I want to third knowing what you mean about sadness for the loss of plans that are no longer required, hopes and dreams that are gone.

Thank you for the warm welcome folks. It's incredibly comforting to be around women who understand.

Congrats Olivers - looking forward to hearing your progress.

Sorry to hear how things are progressing emily. It does sound like a possible chemical - how are things this morning?

Bleeding has picked up this morning, like the start of my period, so it looks like I can add a chemical pregnancy to the list. Oh happy days! I'm going to try and erase any memories of the positive tests and try and just think of this as my period.

So sorry to hear that emily. Thinking of you xx

so sorry emily, so disappointing, hope you're not feeling too awful. Rest up and, as you say, focus on getting through this as a normal period if you can, then start anew when it's gone.

Mine is much heavier than first one after mc last cycle. I recommend the good painkillers, red wine and cosy slippers. Sending love x

Sorry emily I agree with anna's recommendations - get cosy, eat the bad food and rest

So af still hasn't arrived for me. I've got a feeling I ovulated late. Around new year.

How long does it take for hcg levels to show if I conceived at new year?
Would it be next weekend? 2 weeks after conception?

I'm still showing negative on cheap eBay tests with fmu but if I ovulated late then it wouldn't show yet would it?

I'm on cd31 of a normally 28 day cycle. So frustrated at the moment but hoping the no showing of af is a good sign xx

Emily I'm sorry this is happening chick. Try and have a duvet day with a hot water bottle and a few films. I know this is going to sound awful but just try and treat it like af. It can be done. I forgot I had a chemical in Feb last year, the only reason I found out again is because I went over some old charts. Think our brains try and protect us with out us even knowing sometimes, and just remember that this too shall pass. If you need a rant you know where we all are x

Thanks ladies.

Emotionally I definitely feel disappointed in the way I would when AF arrives rather than the absolutely gutted feelings that come with a MC.

Travelling back up from my friends this afternoon but looking forward to a cuddle with DH and a nice glass of wine or something tonight.

Sorry to hear that Emily, hope you manage to take some time for yourself to feel better.

Following on from other previous posters, I also feel disappointed from all the changed plans. Particularly a wedding on my due date that is 4 hours away, we weren't going to go, but now we are going, which is great that I get to see my cousin get married, but a little bittersweet as I should be giving birth. Another one is that we purposely booked a particular type of holiday that was different to the type of holiday we had been planning to have, at the end of August, thinking baby would be approx 5/6 weeks. We're obviously still going on that holiday, but feel sad that we won't have the baby with us.

Hey guys,

Just checking in! Well yesterday I decided to take another clear blue as been about a week or so since I tested 1-2 weeks and wanted to see if it had gone up to 2-3 and it had (it never did with previous 2 mmc)
I actually felt a little queasy today too and def don't fancy as much to eat.
Felt quite emotional still which worrys me as I had pnd with my dd.
Still can't believe it's happening, feels like my life is going to change so much and I'm actually scared, is this normal?

Sorry to hear about some of upsetting news on here... I don't know much about chemical pregnancies but sad to hear. What awful things our bodies do to us sometimes hey!!!

Got the dr ringing tomorrow but almost cancelled.. I don't feel like I want to tell him.

Hopefully I'll feel better tomorrow... sorry for the negative attitude tonight guys.

How are you all feeling???

Xxx

Sorry, emily, wish it had turned out differently. But probably a good thing to think of it as AF. Hope you have a nice glass of wine tonight.

Rose, it sounds really promising with a rising HCG, but no wonder you feel emotional. I can't wrap my head around how to deal with a new BFP if it actually turns up at some point. Going through those first nerve-wrecking weeks again, knowing how it all felt when it fell apart the last time, argh! All the best to you. I guess the only way to comfort oneself is to lean on the statistics telling us that most pregnancies work out fine.

We met some friends today, first time after the mmc. They don't know about the lost pregnancy. One of the couples has their due date in April, and another early July (mine were late July). I had been looking forward to tell them that we were expecting too. And now I find myself struggling to be happy for them, which feels really bad and as if I am a horrible person. Hopefully it will feel better with time.

Hello,

Just popping by to say congrats on the bfps.

No news here. I have still been finding things tough and staring down the barrel of another unsuccessful cycle. I think I need to step away from the thread for a while and try to find my own way.

You're a lovely, brave bunch of ladies and I really hope you all have success TTC'ing.

X

Best wishes Say. You know where we'll be if you need us.