TTC after miscarriage thread #7

[SayItIsntSo1]

Hello,

Starting a new one as we've maxed out the #6 thread.

Hoping MrsY, Brenna, Rose, Legend, Miami, Bertie, Insufficiently and all the others find it!

Let it be our lucky no.7 thread for BFPs

Big pompom waves to Little and Eden. I am rooting for the pair of you big time and hope to be joining you soon x

Thanks all, it's funny I'm happy but not at all excited. Maybe relief is enough for now.

littlemiss I found out on 23 sept (12 wk scan) that I had mmc at 8.5 wks. D&C 1 week later, bled for 2 weeks after that. Had my first period 2 weeks later and then conceived on this cycle. Pretty certain I didn't ov last month though, so took me 2 clear cycles to ovulate if that makes sense.

Fingers crossed for you all that 2017 brings joy. I'm packing the hope away again for now as its too much for now, the innocence is gone I guess.

Congratulations Little and Eden! So pleased for you. Let's hope they're healthy, uneventful pregnancies.

We've had an eventful couple of days. Had to take dd to out of hours yesterday evening as she burnt her hands on our wood burner. We never leave her on her own when it's lit. She was playing in our hall (fire is in the living room) and I wasn't watching her for what must have been seconds. Luckily it wasn't bad enough to blister but what a horrible lesson for us all to learn. I feel properly shit about it but my mother still felt a need to have a go at me.

To top it off, said mother is coming to visit tomorrow for 3 days so she'll have plenty of time to really drive it home that 'she told me' and I didn't get a fire guard as 'I think I know better than everyone else'. Nothing to do with the fact that fire guards also get hot enough to burn and dd liked to play with the last one we had

In other news I've decided to have a dry January. Did it last year and felt better for it. It's always nice to start our ski hol first week in Feb with a glass of wine

Not FW and not TWW here so just chilling out and thinking about a more relaxed TTC Jan and Feb. Trying to rationalise that by this time next year it's very, very likely I'll be successfully pregnant and that in the scheme of things that's not the end of the world if it takes that long for a healthy baby. Not sure I'll be capable of such practical thinking come FW!

Hope everyone has had a lovely Christmas.

Sorry to hear about dd Say. Rubbish that your mum is being so unhelpful.

I just got my post-miscarriage BFN so am going to have a quiet bath and contemplate the mixed feelings that come with that. Still haven't had my appointment for recurrent miscarriage clinic through which I need to have something to aim for and feel like we're moving forward.

Also feel fat and bleurgh after gorging myself over the weekend. That in addition to my holiday weight gain pre-BFP and the short period of pregnancy weight gain is not a good combo! I've been thinking about setting myself the goal to run as many days as possible in January. I don't think I'd manage them all as I've got a couple of weekends away but reckon I could do the majority.

Oh say I'm glad your DD is ok, not helpful of your DM to have a go at you, hope you are ok too.

We got to my PIL this afternoon, my SIL is already doing my head in with her mopey I hate being pregnant vibe....oh well only another 48hrs to go and at least I can enjoy the wine! DH and I made a pact we would keep busy as I told him I would find the next few days difficult so have volunteered to take the kids to sort play tomorrow..I must be desperate! 😂

We are off on hols beginning of Jan for a long weekend in the sun without DD but have decided we will do a dry Jan once we are back, thinking it will do us some good after all the indulgence over the past few weeks.

Hope everyone is doing ok

Oh no! I am glad that your DD is okay - these things happen.

I've been working on a blog which I hope to write a bit more in in the new year about parenting/TTC/maybe even pregnancy and miscarriage too. I like to research stuff and look at stats so it's all very data-y but hopefully presented in an easy to understand way.

I've done a post on when to test and why some women get early BFPs and some have to wait if anyone is interested.
parentinggeek.blogspot.de/2016/12/why-do-some-women-get-early-positive.html

Ahh Eden, that has given me some hope that it is possible to get pregnant so soon after. I hope I'm as lucky as you!!
I've just read your blog Bertie. Brilliant read; very informative and definitely useful...you've taught me a few things. Looking forward to reading some more xx

Lovely to see some bfp hoping for sticky beans and healthy pregnancies.
Currently in the 2ww and yesterday felt super positive but have woken up in the night feeling down in the dumps! Af due on Friday and we will be with the inlaws who I struggle with at the best of times so not looking forward to that. Also have a cough and cold so can't imagine that will help.
Good luck to everyone whatever stage you are at x

Crusading; you're very good...I would have taken a few tests already by now lol I'm so impatient.
I remember when I found out I was pregnant in October, I had a runny nose for weeks that I couldn't seem to shift and it never developed into a cold. Not entirely sure whether it was a pregnancy symptom or not, but it did seem like a bit of a coincidence at the time :/
Good luck to you xxx

Congrats on the positive tests on the thread ladies! Loving the good news.

And glad you have your negative now misssugarplum! Weird that the negative is a relief. On with the baby making! Best of luck to you

Thank you Anna, I was really worried that the test might still show as positive as I didn't want it to mess with my mind (as weird as that sounds)...but luckily it was negative :) xx

It's strange how comforting that negative test is isn't it, suppose it's the last bit of closure and now means you can move on.

Yeahh I agree Sarah. It's such a worrying and traumatic few weeks and then you get that negative test and it's almost as though it never actually happened and it was all a horrible nightmare :/ xx

Yeh it's a roller coaster of emotion. I'm now feeling a bit more settled after mine but it's took a long 10 weeks. Just so desperate for my BFP again!

Hello all can I join? In the midst of my first miscarriage now (I think, booked in for pills but started bleeding on Christmas Eve). Found out at 9 weeks that baby only measured 6 and had stopped growing.
This was my first pregnancy so I'm hopeful for the future just want this over and done with now so I can start to heal and move on.
Just read through the entire thread. So sad to see so many of us here but I'm
pleased to see that some of you have had good news recently.

Really interesting blog Bertie please let us know when you write more posts as I'd be interested to read them too.

How are you doing crusading? I'm also in the tww and at my in laws who I struggle with! 9dpo today but started spotting last night so assuming AF is on her way. If not here by sat think I will test although does mean my LP is so short Have you tested yet?

OK, I will :) Thanks for the encouragement!

I think my fertile week has started so I'll need to grab DH when he gets home later Perhaps we can have a nice new year's celebration!

When did you have your miscarriage Bertie?! I'm wondering if my fw will be anytime soon xx

Welcome rum

So I'm feeling really bummed out and rangy today.

I'm pretty convinced that nowish is when I'm ovulating and I think my cycle is approx 31 days. I know I should've used the ov strips this month but didn't.

Have been DTD lots this month; approx 4 times a week but last night I was just so fecking tired and trying to muster the wherewithal to get my leg over tonight. And I'm convinced it's all in vain, I'm pretty confident I've missed the window somehow and I'm just getting fucked off at the amount of physical and emotional "work" this is taking.

DP and I are off to Rome Jan 14. I think that's when AF is due. I should be over the moon about pasta/pizza/the Coliseum but I'm just thinking that I know my happiness will come crashing down when AF inevitably pops up.

I'm tired of shagging and I'm tired of even thinking about this. Plus I'm just having a princess fit today as I should be 32 weeks pregnant, not pissing around with fucking sticks and ordering tests off the Internet.

Bollocks to it.

I've had two, last one was in August.

legend of beans it's all a crock of shit isn't it! But your post did make me chuckle. I keep thinking how many weeks I would be. But that really isn't helping! Hoping to fall again by my due date. I suspect most of you guys had or have he same hope. Someone I hope that would make it easier?

Legends it is all such a head fuck. I cannot believe how much emotional energy it takes up. I keep trying to tell myself I'm "not trying not preventing" and I'm only 3 weeks post-MC but just had some spotting and can't help thinking what if? Even though I don't really want to be pregnant again before I go to recurrent miscarriage clinic as no doubt it'll just go wrong again. ARGH!

DH and I have occasionally had months when we've decided we just can't be arsed and have only DTD when we actually wanted to, not when we felt we had to. Although it doesn't particularly help with the torture of the TWW I do find it helps with a rest on the physical side and means we have a bit more vigour for the next month if you get what I mean.

I know how you feel legend it certainly doesn't feel romantic just having to dtd just incase to ensure you cover all days. I hate it. This month we missed the day after positive opk as my dh husband was too tired. This caused an argument as I was so disappointed that we hadn't managed to dtd on one of the important days! I hate how obsessive it has made me.

It all feels very unromantic. And even worse when it then will cause arguments!
We try to just dtd when we want to. We're both aware of when I'm in my fertile window & therefore both make more of an effort but we don't really mention it or discuss it and somehow that takes the pressure off.

I was a little bit obsessive last month. So have refrained from mentioning about babies etc or my cycle at all I hopes of trying to forget about how crazy inside I feel lol!

Oh totally with all of you struggling with the effort of TTC. My Dh and I are not very good at it and tend to just dtd when we want to, might be why it took me 6 months after first miscarriage to get a BFP again!

Although after having our 2 at home over Christmas I'm reconsidering whether another is a good idea! (Big age gap, bossy toddler, grumpy almost teenager!)