The October Bus - hoping for lots of BFPs and Summer babies!!

[Writerwannabe83]

Hi guys, just starting the October bus.

I'm almost 33, have a DS (2.5 years) and am now trying for DC2. I caught pregnant on cycle 1 but unfortunately had an early miscarriage and am now entering cycle 5.

My current situation is that DH has been changing his mind over the last 12 months to wanting to try for another, then not wanting to, then wanting to etc and it's been very difficult. We have now come to the compromise that we can actually try up until next August but if nothing has happened by then we stop TTC.

I'm on CD3 now, I usually ovulate around days 17/18 and have cycles of around 31/32 days.

Good luck to everyone!!!

flappergirl - I'm really sorry you're having these problems. Has this ever happened before TTC or is it something new?

Without being too personal - is it that he can get an erection and have but just not ejaculate, or is he struggling to even get an erection?

Writer is it worth trying a frer? My ic htps are still barely showing a line where as the frer is now as dark as the control

Writer or have you got any opks left? They work too

I have used both an IC and an OPK tonight and both are completely second line-less. I will no doubt wake up to my period in the morning. I'm so fed up of being disappointed every month

Big hugs, writer, sorry you're so down, I know how you feel. I'm sorry to hear you have bfns but until af turns up you're still in. I have my fx for you.

Sorry writer Like Sooz, I'm keeping my fx for you

It's not going to happen - complete BFN this morning too.

A really exciting prospect has come up at work which I have been deliberating over for a few weeks because there's no point me taking on the role if I plan on getting pregnant/having a new baby etc but now I'm thinking f*ck it and may just apply anyway. We've been TTC for 7 months and got nowhere so I'm thinking perhaps having DC2 was never meant to be for me and I should follow my career path instead.

Nothing wrong with that writer. Maybe a shift in focus will let things happen quicker on your TTC journey. You can have both!! Good luck. Go get it!! #ICanIWill

Go for it Writer as you know Sod's law! Apparently it's good to keep busy and focus on other things - not sure of the science behind that but worth a go I guess!

Go for it Writer as you know Sod's law! Apparently it's good to keep busy and focus on other things - not sure of the science behind that but worth a go I guess!

writerit has never happened before and its just the jizzing element that is the issue. I think he might have been crying in the shower after the 3rd time and I have also never ever seen him cry. He treated me like a princess last night cos he was feeling so awful. He picked me up from work and gave me a massage and ran me and candlelit bath with wine (on the side, not a bath of wine which would also have been gratefully received). He really does want a baby so I dont see what the problem is. Must be some kind of ejaculation anxiety. We'll just keep at it and hopefully he'll over-cum it. hahaha (crying inside). Sorry you reckon you're out again. 7 months isnt that long at all -I know it must seem like forever to you though. Go for the job, your happiness doesn't depend on a second child -who will come in his/her own good time. And sods law dictates that if you get it, you'll be knocked up in the first month! x

You're all right. I'm going to lay off baby making and if it happens then great but I can't make it the focus of my life anymore because it's just bringing me down.

This opportunity at work is fantastic, it's something I would be really good at and something I really want to do so I'm just going to go for it.

My pregnancy was high risk to both me and the baby and the risks to me continued for many months following the birth and maybe those risks were worth taking to get at least one baby but maybe they aren't worth taking just to have another.

Sometimes I think life is paved out for us and I should just count my blessings I have one healthy, gorgeous child, and change my focus.

flappergirl - maybe you could try and make him ejaculate other using other methods if you know what I mean?

If he's able to in those circumstances then it may indicate that he's just feeling the pressure of baby making sex?

I do believe though that these things can snowball and the anxiety can worsen and he'll be so worried during sex in case he can't ejaculate and then that worry is what will prevent him from doing so.

Making him ejaculate by other means may break the cycle as such, make him see that he can do it, hopefully give him back some confidence and then things may improve when it comes to TTC sex.

Writer definitely go for it. When I conceived #1 we were planning our wedding which was 3 months away and I was very busy in work. We'd only started trying because I had to try for a year before I could get fertility tests so I wasn't stressing about BFNs and I caught 2nd month. I was totally distracted from all things baby making. Now I'm a SAHM mother and obsess most days over TTC. I have a new group of mother friends who are all trying/expecting which means the green eyed monster is with me most days and I have been trying since March. I have always said that the reason I caught is because it was the last thing on my mind. Go for the job and give yourself a new focus and purpose. It'll give you a boost and most probably get you that BFP.as everyone's mentioned Sod's Law will definitely play a part.

I know how you feel, I'm there too. It must be common to feel like this ar this stage. I think it's because all the books say you should conceive by month 6.

Flapper I agree with Writer. Treat him to a couple of BJs so that he can see that he can do it and then hopefully it'll give his confidence a boost.

Lots of luck for the job, writer - go for it! I've been trying 8 cycles and nothing and I don't have any children already, it's good you can count your blessing of your first child but it doesn't stop you being sad for another. Lots of big hugs and I look forward to hearing all about your great new job soon!!

flappergirl - my DP doesn't ejaculate every time so we only dtg once every three days so he can "build it up", so to speak. That has worked for us (although no baby yet) as he's too busy feeling horny to stress about baby-making! Everyone's different, though. Fx he'll settle into it and become less stressed. I agree you should have fun in other ways to remind him he can do it!

Hi can I join you all too...

TTC no 2 (DS 21 months) cycle no 5, currently cycle day 12

Finding this TTC business bit stressfull this time around as conceived DS first month of trying (very lucky I know)

Here's hoping for lots of BFP on the October bus

Hi cooperbug!
so sorry to hear about everyones troubles, I'm currently online xmas shopping to take my mind off things. I'm 6dpo and getting twinges in my uterus but not going to get my hopes up! It's such a dissapointment when af turns up (again!)

Af arrived at 13dpo making this cycle just 23 days. So think i will be able to jump on the back of october bus. Ovia says af due 29th, cycle 5 since mmc in june. My periods have been all over the place though. Cycle 1-30 days cycle 2- 30 days cycle 3-18 days cycle 4- 26 days cycle 5- 23 days ( wasnt trying first cycle)

Still in the land of confusion here. Like Writer i am just waiting for AF.
I am on cd35, cycle# 3 after having IUD removed. Cycle# 1 was 24 days and cycle #2 was 28 days.
I did hpts on day 26 and day 30 and got BFNs.
Yesterday i posted i was really pre menstrual with sore boobs and having loads of cramps - totally true, really thought i was going to wake up to af. Nothing today and no cramping either.

It's really strange. I know if i read this i would just tell me to do another hpt but i can't really face it!
I just keep wondering if maybe i am skipping a month or didn't ovulate this month.
I am in limbo.....

I think i am going to hold out until the weekend to test again as then it will be day # 39/40 and that is just stupidly long for me so i would surely have enough HcG to show up if i was pg.

flappergirl my OH had a similar issue this month (the getting it up part mostly though!) and it took 3 nights of trying to 'succeed'. That is why i had written this month off. I def think it was the pressure although that didn't stop me being really upset about it. so i feel your pain.

Ill keep you all in the loop!!
x

That is a long cycle mother, wonder what's going on with it. Fingers crossed for you getting a BFP at the weekend.

I'm just in the TWW so not much to report here. My skin has broken out which is a pain but a sure sign I just ovulated as it seems to happen pretty much every month. Going to keep an eye on my temps and see what happens. I forgot how mindnumbingly boring the TWW is from last time TTC, need to just forget about it and get on with things but that's easier said than done!

MIL is coming over tomorrow so have been running about hiding OPKs and pee cups at the back of the bathroom cupboard, I do not want her knowing we're trying!

Flapper, maybe try other ways for a few weeks. I know my DH would HATE if I ever suggested we were just DTD because I was fertile. He said last week "you can't just use me for my super sperm"

The pampering is his way of admitting guilt, he's feeling like it's his fault! You need to remind him it's not a race, it's a slow pace walk together. I know maybe sometimes it feels almost desperate to conceive but it needs a good balance between fun, love and great timing.

Does he know when you 'need' to DTD rather than it being a surprise for him?? Maybe he feels like he's had all the control taken away? Good luck!! I know you probably already know what's going on, just wanted to add my thoughts. X

Mother - I was reading Taking Control of Your Fertility (hence forth to be known as TCYF) last night and I wonder if you might have a wee ovarian cyst? This is a cause of long cycles and delayed AF, usually resolves by itself though, are very common and don't seem to cause much of a bother. Depending on the type of cyst, it prevents ovulation that month but the next cycle goes back to normal. Apparently they're more common in women who have/have had an IUD (I have so I'm on the look out for it and own't trust a late AF without a +ive HCG result).

I've noticed that my CM is pretty samey with not a great deal of egg white and apparently this is related to the IUD too so it's making it harder for me to track my cycles. It's so easy to get confused! I never thought it would be this complicated!

Mother, I had a random long cycle last month and got af a week late. No idea why although what bairn says is interesting.

So frustrated! Had an OPK like this yesterday too. Really dark but not quite positive! CD 18 (normally 29 day cycle) now!