Thread 18 TTC#1 We have cats, courgettes AND cake

[AliceScarlett]

Hugh enjoys ISW and his love affair with Doreen. He watches out for skittle tits and weepyitis. Mrs Arseholey Fucknut (Af) shows up when you least want her but brings wine and soft cheese as a consolation prize.

We don't have rules as such but expect to be talked down from the ledge with kind and well meaning but firm words if you get too hysterical. But most importantly don't convince yourself you're pregnant in the tww That is paramount! It messes with your head and makes you crazy crazier

We don't get a lot of baby dust in these here parts. We want a fanny full of determined Doreen, not unicorn farts and gnome tears with extra sparkle. We've been going a while now so the novelty has somewhat worn off and we're slightly battle scarred and bruised in the cervix area.

Post your stats and add your dates. A more lovely, supportive group of ladies you couldn't wish to meet. We've got a few grads sticking around I won't leave and no question is too daft. We have opk experts, cervical mucus management teams and symptom spotters extraudinaire!

Hep, I am rubbish at symptom spotting too. I also seem to get majorly superstitious around the TWW. And grumpier, which I'm not sure DH appreciates!

Spotted this morning, 10 DPO. I remember when I started trying TTC my mum always told me she knew when she was pg with me because she 'had a show' - she spotted. So the first time that happened to me, I was majorly excited. AF showed up precisely on schedule. Then it happened again 2 months ago. So did AF. So this time I am regarding the spotting with one arch eyebrow raised. The bastarding thing is that before TTC, I never once spotted this early in a cycle, at least that I noticed. I might spot the day before AF showed but that would be it.

I'm also constipated, tired (but I always am, so I'm not setting any stock in that), hot and have had some pretty vivid dreams in the last few days. One was so clear I can remember touching and smelling things in it which is rare for me - though again, that was on a rare morning when I could sleep in for once, which virtually never happens any more.

Jem, you're not alone - and nor are you, Skip - I think we all feel you. My cousin gave birth to her second a few days ago and while I am happy for her there was a very unworthy part of me that felt very sour at the same time. I keep noticing ladies with bumps and feeling mournful that it's not me.

I have to hope it will be, eventually. Not getting hopes up this month though, at least not until my bus ticket passes without AF!

Oh and kwick, gl on your TWW! Have been thinking of you.

fx for you kav

I am trying not to symptom spot. But by boobs are definitely less sensitive and my old bra is comfy again. My resting heart rate has fallen back down. I really don't believe I am still pregnant. I just want to get the next unpleasant step over and done with.

OH is still checking i am eating healthily and being careful emptying the litter tray (with gloves and poo-bag technique).

Told him i want a bottle of really nice wine this weekend!

actually most of my distraction is about whether i will have to cancel a work trip to europe next week.

Almost wanting the miscarriage to start today so the worst will be over before i fly. not sure when i can warn my colleagues I may not go.

I am fairly certain that risking having a miscarriage abroad, alone and during a work meeting is a bad idea.

Alice too true.

DHs mum is very ill so been in and out of hospital for last three days, checked my phone to find 2 invitations to baby showers and no less than 7 pictures of bumps, scans and nurseries. Sent directly to me, not on FB, ALL from people who know about both the mc and MIL's terminal cancer. WTAF people??? On another note, I think I might have some OV cramps so hopefully I can dtd tonight, but all feels a bit meaningless now.

To those of you being tricked by your bodies/minds/both have some try to relax and distract yourself.

Skip That is really insensitive of them. Who wants pictures of bumps and nurseries anyway?!

Hep That sounds super stressful. I can see how you would want it over and done with. Do you have to go away for work?

Hep just saw your post. I am honestly so sorry that you're having to go through this shitty time of not knowing. Have you POAS? If you previously did a CBD they sometimes go back to showing 1-2 weeks etc after previously showing 3+ but its not really a reliable indicator of HCG levels which can continue to rise anyway. Can you cancel it anyway, or is that frowned upon? I said to my work that I was having some tests done (which is why I was off to docs so much) and that I may need to go in for a routine procedure. It broke my heart to say that, but then I ended up needing 6 days off so they were prepared for that. IF you end up needing d&c or medical management then they won't let you do it if you are going away, as you need to be able to guarantee you'll have someone with you 24/7 until its over.

for you Hep - whatever happens you do have to look after yourself and I'm glad your OH seems to be doing just that. The work trip must be a pain though - I wouldn't want to be away at a time like that either so I can understand why you'd be stressing about it. Skip's suggestion is a good one if you think work would understand.

Skip, people are dumb sometimes. I doubt many of them were thinking before they sent you those pictures. :( I haven't been through what you have - TTC is driving me nuts enough - and just with that experience alone I'd like to think I'd be more sensitive about who I share things with or ask questions in future.

thanks kav,skip

I am telling myself the same thing I tell others..... health comes before work.

It won't be good if i miss this trip. but I will say "due to medical reasons", "on medical advice". I have already warned one senior colleague as I had to tell him I would be away on friday due to a hospital appointment.

I want to warn one other colleague who will be going on the same trip, but i don't want to formally cancel until friday.

skip i can understand them sending the invites, but the photos was probably be insensitive. if they already know you about your miscarriage try to broach the subject over a cup of tea and say " I hope you understand, but i find it hard to look at pregnancy/nursery photos right now. I am of course wishing you all the best and looking forward to meeting baby in the future".

kav all bran ... lots of all bran.... won't miss that symptom!

Kav I've had exactly the same! Never spotted (that I noticed) before ttc and then it starts happening now! I am also now wiser to the bodies tricks.

Hep it's such a roller coaster that you've been on, with work throwing in a few obstacles too. Glad you've got your OH to look after you.

Skip how totally insensitive of them!! Have a very large glass of wine and feel smug that they can't do that? Also very sorry to hear about your mother-in-law being so poorly. It's a lot to handle all at once, take care of yourself.

Oh dear, I'm not helping myself. I've just checked my resting heart rate on my Fitbit. About 1 week ago it rose and stayed there for 3/4 days. Now it's come back down but still higher than it was before!! I think I need to step away from the madness.

Thanks for the list hep. If you can get out of the work trip I would. Appreciate this is easier said than done. Still keeping my fingers crossed for Friday for you.

kav I had mentally vivid dreams before AF that got my hopes up a bit too.

I think it's all the progesterone that rises after your ovulate - it's preparing your body for pregnancy. If you are not pregnant it starts to drops away at about 10 DPO I believe, whereas if you are then you start producing hcg and your progesterone keeps up. Once I'd got my head around this I realised that up until around 10 DPO you feel no different if you are pregnant or not pregnant. This helps me stay a bit more sane when I get all the PMS. This process has made me realise how bad my PMS actually is in fact! So much more in tune with it all now.

skip sorry you are going through such a hard time shame on your friends sending you such insensitive messages

lovely exactly the same boob issues - last few months nothing, this month they are sore again bugger off you untrustworthy things!

Skip - great name btw xx I agree with everyone about your friends, incredibly insensitive. I think I would have lost it to be honest. I know they are probably caught up in their own little bubble of happiness but there is no excuse for that shit. Excuse my French.

I have just got over a wave of pregnancy like symptoms, vivid dreams, sore boobs, spotting, back ache and neck ache. Sometimes it's just too hard to know whether it's AF or pg.

Can you put me back on the bus at the end? Is that allowed? 5th October for next period. Feel sad I'm crossed off already...

Yes we need an October list. No doubt I'll be joining you next week skipper, save me a seat

Just catcing up on everyone
Hep i am sorry tou are in such a difficult position hopefully you can get oit of the work trip if needs be
Skip that is very incensitive some people are just too caught up in their own world
Lovely i ve never heard of the heartbeat thing i might be tempted to buy a fitbit now !

I need a bus ticket for the 28th of september pls :)

Blood tests back, my 1 errent hormone is still high. Quite relieved by this in a weird way, no idea what would have happened next otherwise! Only problem is that the receptionist had no notes on what was happening next so I've got another appointment for next Thursday for this.

Which hormone is high Lovely?

~frantically tries to remember~

It's one of the ones that goes up if you're actually pregnant, it began with a p I think... Progesterone?

Hmm i thought progesterone being high indicates that you do ovulate :) i had some private blood tests done the doctor checked progesterone on cd21 and they want to see higher than 30 to confirm ovulation.
Hopefully they will explain more on your next appoitment

Is progesterone the thing that increases your temp during ovulation?

Yes progesterone is higher after you ovulate. I think is "released" from the coprus luteum and it prepares the endometrium for pottential pregancy .
I have heart low progesterone in the second phase of your cycle means that you are not ovulating . I have never heart of too much progesterone though
Too much esteogen yes too much progesterone no ;p
I learn something new everyday with this ttc business . I admit i have never thought my body does so much :p

ok... i'm starting to crack again. getting nervous. 2 days to go.

I'm obviously not remembering right in that case! I will ask and write it down next week.

Hang in there hep

Not long to go hep You've made it this far. Eat some cake and watch bake off and that's another evening gone.... Then it's just one more day to go, and at least you'll know one way or the other.

I've absolutely no idea which hormone does what ladies, but I wish they'd all do what they're meant to instead of messing us around!

Hang on in there Hep

skipper seagulls... Really?!

to everyone being baby bombed... I am even jealous of Bridget Jones.

alice good news on cyst

Ladies: some of you seem to have complicated sex lives - but at least you are getting some however infrequent... I am nearly a virgin again its been so long.

lovely you CANNOT trust the boobage!!!!

hep Cancel the work trip - you come first
I really hope all is ok

After having gone through a MC I would recommend surgical management - natural can take ages (and I could not face seeing) also you may still need surgery. Very hard and personal decision.

One of my post embryo transfer points to follow is "avoid constipation"

I am desperate to know if I am "with child", I am bruised everywhere (injections, blood sucking) and I am knackered. And I am still flipping in a work meeting