TTC #1 Thread 15. Don't. Trust. The. Boobs. ( . )( . )

[StarkyTheDirewolf]

Hugh enjoys ISW and his love affair with Doreen. He watches out for skittle tits and weepyitis. Mrs Arseholey Fucknut (Af) shows up when you least want her but brings wine and soft cheese as a consolation prize.

We don't have rules as such but expect to be talked down from the ledge with kind and well meaning but firm words if you get too hysterical. But most importantly don't convince yourself you're pregnant in the tww That is paramount! It messes with your head and makes you crazy crazier

We don't get a lot of baby dust in these here parts. We want a fanny full of determined Doreen, not unicorn farts and gnome tears with extra sparkle. We've been going a while now so the novelty has somewhat worn off and we're slightly battle scarred and bruised in the cervix area.

Post your stats and add your dates. A more lovely, supportive group of ladies you couldn't wish to meet. We've got a few grads sticking around I won't leave and no question is too daft. We have opk experts, cervical mucus management teams and symptom spotters extraudinaire!

I hope some testing here soon with some good news for people

thanks fishy, thats useful to know.

I am definitely back down to "moderate" stress instead of "ARRGGHHHHHH-level" stress.

Went to boots yesterday bought pg tests and sanitary towels as I figure I will be needing one or the other!

may have to break out the cross-stitch again...

Haahah hep the person on the till would be v confused by that shopping basket, unless she was one of us!!

Fishy good to have you on the avo bus! I eat them with scrambled eggs, with anything actually, but they are also good just with a spoon and a splash of balsamic vinegar right in the stone-hole!

Heartburn is pg sign no? Are you using good tests hep?

fingers crossed you and skip and brewing some little beans!!

fishy avocados are my fave, I like them mashed on toast with some salt and like juice.

jem yes it can be, but it can also be related to the stress I think. It certainly isn't helping me stay away from the edge. Though I don't know how early it can arrive as a pg symptom.

I really don't normally get heartburn.

I am using first-response, and really did squint, but no sign of a second line.

so I am going to try to be zen-like and keep calm, and keep carrying supplies in my handbag just-in-case...

fx the cashier did comment "hope you have a good evening!"

thanks for helping me keep sane everyone !

lovelyfishy you named the eating regime after me! I feel so proud!!
So here is how I eat avocados:
-mashed on to a nice bread that has been toasted with a vinagarette dressing

• with a prawn cocktail (I am after all a child of the 70s)
• with poached eggs and toast
• in a salad with leaves and roast chicken

We definitely are due some bfps!!!
Everyone who is POAS it had better be a FRER!!!!

I hate avacados BLEUGH!! (sorry kwick)
devil's fruit

Mmmm, now I just want avocados, thanks kwick and Lovelyfishy! Delicious!

Currently on cd17 and my OH is in full blown anxiety meltdown so over fw we have only managed to dtd on cd13. He is desperate to be a dad and his fear of being infertile is preventing us from being able to dtd, thereby rendering us infertile. I don't really know what to do, he doesn't have anyone he feels he can talk to about this stuff apart from me. Do any of you know of a decent forum for the guys who are ttc? I've been googling and not really found anything that useful. He needs to go for a SA, but is freaking out about it.

Fx hep we're all rooting for you!

Oh snarky your poor fella he needs to forget about everything fertility and get his mojo back!

Could you put some time aside to just enjoy being a couple, having fun, not worrying or talking about conception? An activity or date or treat of some kind? A couples massage might be good.

Also how about focusing on foreplay and saying right we're not having sex tonight, just having some fun?

Sounds like he needs to take the pressure out of it all somehow. Really hope he can relax and get back on track either way hon.

Kwick your food suggestion post last week was pretty much my shopping list!

Snarky it's such a shame there isn't somewhere like this but for guys. I think my DH would benefit from it too! At least you know he's totally up for being a dad, even if it's a mixed blessing now?

snarky that sounds awful for you (and him)! I think there is a definite common theme running amongst a few of us here that are struggling with our blokes and DTD. I suppose it is a huge step for them too, and it's so easy us saying "oh they only have to have sex like they've been doing fine up till now" but there is huge pressure now that there wasn't before. It is a shame that they don't seem to be able to chat to their friends about it. Any problems like that for me and I'd be straight round my best mates with a bottle of wine to talk it over. Agree with jem about just trying to make it fun? I'm having to do similar here, try not to make a big deal out of it in fw as that's when he seems to wobble! (No pun intended! 😜)

I bloody love avacado's!!! I'm going to eat more now I know they help with fertility!

No chance of me getting any tonight with the football result!!!

Thanks everyone, it's pretty frustrating, particularly as it's compounded every month when AF arrives and we both feel devastated. He gets so upset with himself.

Thanks jem and moose, I think we definitely need a holiday to takes us out of this for a bit. The trouble isn't that he's not aroused, it's that his brain rebels against it. He won't let me touch him when he's in full-blown anxious mode. I can spoon him, but no stroking any part of him, he'll just gently hold my hands still if I try. I think I need to get to him before we go to bed, maybe take his brain by surprise so it doesn't have a chance to spoil things by flipping out with a hundred negative thoughts (that sentence makes me sound like a rapist- I don't mean take him by surprise in a non consensual way, I mean change things up a bit so that he doesn't have the chance to over think things and go into a tailspin).

It's really comforting to know that we're not the only ones going through this ridiculousness. You're right lovely, he's going to be the best dad in the world, and then this will all have been worthwhile 🙂

snarky he sounds really sweet! Is it worth trying to have a couple of months off trying?? (Or at least say to him that you are?!) Maybe book a holiday and say, oh I don't want to be pregnant on it, let's not try until afterwards - and book the holiday through FW - without telling him! Would he maybe relax a bit more then? A bit sneaky though perhaps????

snarky this is a tough situation to be in for sure. Are you using a tracker app to determine your fertile week? My thinking is that you could mess with your cycle length to make it look like FW is ages away, then say 'oh, look, I'm not fertile right now so lets just get jiggy for the fun of it' and see what happens?

Thought old-timey Ovia users would appreciate this: I opened the app just...well, for no reason, and it said 'Cycle day 1 - you're on your period' and I thought 'oh, am I? Ah well, there you go then'. Took me a beat to realise I was NOT on my period, it was just old Ovibitch trying to CONTROL ME as USUAL. Feel v grumpy right now.

Lol! What apps do people use out of interest?

I have ovia but only used it for two months and i admit I'm already ignoring the fw days it gives etc and just using it as a record to chart temps and dtd etc.

I'm now opking again and my mission this month is to end it confident that I actually ovulated. So as I had suspected my 7pm testing wasn't optimum i went to work today armed with 'kit' to test at work at 2pm each day in the form of freezer bags and plastic shot glasses from poundland.

My first triumph was successfully timing my slot on the way back from lunch (so it didn't look odd that I had my handbag with me) such that the loos were empty so no worry about rustling!
And second triumph was successfully aiming for the shot glass with no spillage!

ah wingingit you've learned early not to trust the meddling old aunt that is Ovia. Only give her the basics, and do not listen when she insists you are upduffed. I have attempted Fertility Friend but found it frustrating to update 2 apps, and I already had a relationship with Ovia (albeit a poor one) so she won. Good work on the OPKs, I gave up some time ago once I realised they don't guarantee ovulation just the hormones, but lots of people have sworn by them so best of luck to you.

Where is everyone today? I found myself reading some obscure mn AIBU forums out of sheer boredom...

winging love your shot glass strategy!! I grab a plastic cup from the water cooler and casually sleek to the loo with it down by my side. Usually go to another floor in the office too. It is a minefield!! But there's a weird part of me that enjoys it too?! Bit of excitement in my day haha.

skip it is a bit quiet isn't it? Come back old members!! I'll post the list to see if it jobs some memories.

On the app debate, I joined this thread back in January, when I assumed one swift shag would knock me up effortlessly. Everyone on this thread was complaining about ovia so much that I never went there. I have used Pink Pad to track my periods for years - it's very basic but does indicate when you're most likely to be fertile and when your next period is due. It's got a lot of data on me so I'm sticking with it. Plus there is a notes bit for each day, so I put some observations in during the TWW - partly to keep me sane the following month so when I fart and think I am obviously pregnant with twins I can check back and remember this happened every month for the last 6 months and no I'm probably still not pregnant!

Hi all,
Just thought I'd pop in briefly from Italy! Oh I love avocados guys, can't get enough of them! On toast, with scrambled eggs, as homemade guacamole, in salads, in bacon sarnies!!
Have been having lots of delicious food here (but no avocados)
CD33. Caved and POAS this morning seeing as I'd managed to sleep all night without weeing for a change! Just an IC (have got a Frer stashed for later in holiday if needs be...) it was bfn (although, if I held it to one side, in the light, sort of squinted ~and stood on one leg~ thought perhaps there was the tiniest hint of a sort of almost line..)

Ooh there's a problem with the app - not letting me post - I've had to come to the desktop version to post. Possibly why it's so quiet!

Oh god marmite!! Fingers crossed love. When will you crack out the frer???

I now want a bacon avo sambo so much...

Haha sorry jem - maybe one for dinner?!
Might try another IC tomorrow and save Frer for few days yet! In my heart I think it will be AF but we shall see. Last cycle was 36 days so may not even be late yet, was just hoping cycle had shortened!

I often find I stop getting notifications about new posts so go on to check the thread and there's been loads

Well I'm out! Crashed out after a 25 day cycle wtf!! oh well, I have a party on Sunday so no guilt over having a glass or two I suppose.....

snarky anxiety is a horrible thing. Do you think you could change to having a non committed couple of months were you just wing it, no pressure and just have sex as and when you both feel like it? I agree it would be great for him to be able to vent somewhere like we have here. What measures does he use when he feels like this? Is there anyone he talks to in general? When you feel deep in the grip of anxiety it's so hard to feel and see the positive in anything.

hep how are things today?

jem im with you, apps are for recording basic information only! skip yes, I don't need any other forms of meddling in my life, electronic or otherwisemore especially the Ovia bitch! For such purposes I have always used period tracker just so I had an idea when af would be. So I just continued with that and like you jem I use the note section to record any info. Oh, the days of ignorant bliss thinking it was one shag and boom a baby

skip did you come across anything interesting in your wander through the threads? (Not that I'm being nosey or anything)