TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided - all welcome!

[Kwick709]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!

Caution thats super awesome news - closer is good! Let us know what the prices are like!!

Kwick feel better and non large like soon!

Hi to all!

non large? Non LURGY!!! jeez, the auto correct.....

Could not get in to work - feverish and yucky

Hope tests went well karen

Still no sign of af - have run out of white knickers... So on to skin colour...

caution had a good call consult with Amanda from CRGW today. Quick, friendly, very efficient. I liked them on the phone far more than my local clinic which seems very officious and old hat compared to these guys.

She took me through the timeline and when I'd need to be at clinic which was: pre treatment planning, egg collection, then 5days later egg implantation.

They have a company that delivers you the meds work or home, which is great.

Also, she drew my attention to the fact that 2016 prices for treatments have gone down. The price for a single IVF by nearly £400!

And she was super helpful re donor sperm and the fact that if you're ordering in from esb etc that you can also choose a Welsh sample as back up ahead of time just in case there's an issue with defrosting, where as most clinics want you to order in 3-6 vials which can get mighty expensive. She said a donor nurse would call me to give me more info and she did within the hour.

So I'm happy and feel like I may have found my clinic!

That's brilliant Stork!!
Was it your first consultation telephone call? How long did it last? My problem is I can't get in touch with them just yet as I've just started my new job - and I finish at 5pm so I don't think I could have a phone consult yet as I can't have time of to have one done! If that makes sense??

Have the prices for treatment gone down just for IVF? Or is that all of them? And is it just Wales where the price has gone down??

I've been in touch with them through email. I explained I had recently had a scan done by a gynaecologist (end of April) and they said it's fine but because it's not done by them the results may be a bit inaccurate. Which is completely understandable. I also explained I had my HIV, Hep B & C and Rubella blood tests done in March and they said they'd want an AMH one also, but it'd need to be done within three months of treatment - I'm looking at having treatment end of the year so don't need to worry about that just yet.
I also asked about the consultation - how long I have before I have to have treatment, etc, and I'm just waiting for them to get back to me. I have to say, they were very quick at replying to me, and it all seems really good... I think I may have found my clinic, too!!!

Sorry about the length - it's hard to explain in short lol X

stork glad you have found your clinic & great news on prices. What are their success rates like? taydex was very helpful explaining those to me :)
BTW taydex how are you doing?

caution you are so prepared! What are you doing on a supplements front?

I just read the BPA chapter in it starts with the egg... I had avoided it up until now. Depressed now as I am not sure how I can realistically decrease my exposure to BPA.

I have been so ill today - but really hope I am able to go in tomorrow - trip to Madrid on Wednesday/Thursday.

Kwick - I have to be prepared! My mind feels out of control if I'm not 😂 I'm going to start doing OPK's now my periods have come back to regular (give or take a few days) to see where I stand with ovulation.
I haven't taken any supplements yet - I was thinking of taking Pregnacare or something similar a few months before I actually start treatment - I don't see the point starting them 5/6 months in advanced.
All I have to do now is save hard... My holiday has come out of my savings so I'm £700 down. Need to save that £700 back up over the next few months and then I can go from there!!

What's BPA?
Sorry to hear you've been so poorly are you taking anything for it, like multi vitamins? They're meant to work wonders with the lurgy!! X

caution, ya my first consult! but second call with them. They've called me in the evening before after 6 so maybe you could ask about that? Also they work Saturday mornings I think? It was 20mins, but that's because I needed to be in another meeting! The pre treatment planning meeting is a long one though, that's when you are actually at the clinic.

I think it's only IVF prices that have gone down, alas! And not sure about Bristol. I meant to ask about Bristol price list for you but just ran out of time, sorry!

Ya, so I've had amh and Antral follicle count completed, the rest of my blood work etc will be done there I guess, they include a lot of the blood tests in the pricing as I recall, and as I'm looking at out/Nov, I don't need to have them done just yet.

Ya, they are super quick and uber friendly! Re donor from xytex I was a bit confused as couldn't find any donors that met my requirements who were cmv negative, and Amanda was able to explain that actually it's such a low risk for IVF due to the washing etc, that the uk don't even test for it anymore. Very helpful!

So I had queries about timeline too, basically as far as I remember, if it's October/Nov for treatment, then it's:
-August for pretreatment planning, donor decisions/ordering and medication tuition (Wales)
-September cycle start meds
-2wks before egg collection payment is due
-end oct/beg Nov egg collection (Wales)

• +5 days after, embryo implantation (fingers crossed!)

That help?

kwick 30-35% chance of actual baby in arms given my history, age, Amh and follicle count.

caution you may want to take something for egg quality like coq10?
BPA leaches from some plastics including paper receipts. It interferes with fertility.

stork interesting what you say about cmv... My UK clinic - CRGH - only allows me to use negative. I got a negative donor from Xytex.

Yes kwick I thought it was strange, but as she said, U.K. don't even test for it anymore so they thought it a tad redundant to only allow negative candidates. And of course the majority of donors are positive cmv so if it was that big of a problem surely it would be a no no re cmv? Colour me confused!

Stork - ooh, really? I may have to ask them to ring me after 6pm one evening! Is the consult you had today the one you had to pay £150 for? I'm just about dubious about paying £150 for a telephone consult that won't even last half an hour, because how much information can they get out of me over the phone...

No worries! Thank you for thinking of me though, I'll ask about Bristol prices when I finally do have a consult with them :)

So the blood tests they include in the prices - is that the ones you'll have just before the treatment? I'm sure they can explain all this to me but seeing as you can too I thought I'd ask you first

Ooh that's interesting about CMV. I thought you'd have to go with a negative donor... Would that include IUI also? Because I know they wash the donor sperm before use with IUI, too.

Would I also have a pretreatment planning consult? If so, I'd need to get the time off for that - shouldn't be too hard, it's just travelling there and back in one day that concerns me!

It all helped lovely, thank you!!!

Kwick - I've never thought of taking anything for egg quality! So glad you mentioned it. Coq10 - where do I get that from?
BPA sounds scary

I am so behind on this thread. I'll catch up properly tomorrow.

For now, on the CMV thing: most countries don't make an issue of CMV at all. I believe this is because donor sperm is tested for active CMV to ensure that they are negative for active CMV. It would have to be active to pass on to you. So even if the donor is CMV positive, it just means they've had active CMV in the past.

The most likely place to catch CMV is from the saliva/snot of a young child. So I came to the conclusion that if I was going to go to great lengths to avoid a CMV+ sperm donor I would then have to avoid all my friends for a year, because they all have babies/toddlers. It didn't seem realistic somehow to do that

I think everyone has to come to their own decision on this, but for me the risk of catching CMV from the donor seemed negligible and my clinic don't insist on CMV- sperm.

caution I strongly recommend that you read "it starts with the egg" as how much you should take and so on is quite individual.
I take 300mg of Co-enzyme q10 daily - which I buy online. You can get in Holland and Barrett but not in that quantity.

Interesting shoes... My clinic would not let me use cmv positive.
How you doing?

Morning ladies!

Caution ok, so I didn't pay anything for the consult, now that might be because I had already had a full consult at Care Northampton and had my AMH and Antral Follicle Scan results, cycle details and treatment preference to hand. So I suggest you clarify - I think the best thing is to call up reception, and explain the situation that you are living miles away and ask them how best to proceed. Also, suggest you log all questions you need answer to. My first meeting with Care lasted 90minutes as had tons of questions!!

So from their website the following is included in IVF package: Screening blood tests (HIV 1 and 2, Hepatitis B surface antigen, Hepatitis B Core antibodies, Hepatitis C) (if Required). Ive just checked and IUI price includes them too and I think these are done at Pre Treatment planning session where also all the paperwork is completed. (Pap smear, AMH and Antral Follicle scan would need to be done too as you know). The only other pretreatment bits that need to be done for me are ovulation scans and I can get them done in Wales, or get a local sonography clinic to do them, CRGW are fine with either.

As I understand it, if we lived in Wales then we would go to the clinic for a consult, for pre treatment planning and scans etc, but as we are living miles away they are kindly condensing the number of times we are needed there in person, so the sessions there might be longer, but fewer in number - so yeah regardless of what its called I would imagine you need to go meet with them, do paperwork have consult etc and plan treatment before the actual procedure - thats probably the £150...

I imagine it would include IUI, but best to check. As they said yesterday, they wash HIV out of sperm, so CMV doesn't pose an issue. and thanks to shoes and kwick for their thoughts as we try to make sense of various advice and guidance!!! My current thought process is that I won't consider it as a factor and go with medical advice.

Re supplements, Im taking Zita West's Vitafem which has Coq10 in it, and I also take omega 3,6,9 tablets and an additional Folate pill. Folate instead of folic acid (I said additional as Im a tad on the curvy side so need to increase my intake in line with my weight) learn about the difference of folic acid v folate here: authoritynutrition.com/folic-acid-vs-folate/

Hope that helps? Basically give them a call, get a call back and plan from there. I know you aren't planning to do treatment till end of the year, but Im planning for the Oct/Nov cycles and she said it was right to talk to them now.

Call them! call them!

Hola everyone else!

ooh caution you know about HyCoSy or HSG right? just checked their website and you need one or the other if you are thinking of doing IUI to ensure there are no blockages in your tubes. They do it in CRGW, but you may wish to check if you could have it done more locally (I hear it can be a little messy right after and a couple of my friends felt the need for a shower) if they need to do it there, perhaps they could do all your tests and planning in one day, you could bring a friend and have a night in cardiff (with a hotel and a shower if needed?)

you probably knew that, but just wanted to check!

x

Oh, gosh, Hycosy can definitely be messy! They put coloured dye up your tubes, so it, erm, comes out purple.

DP found it very painful, actually, though she is quite sensitive to that sort of pain, so I wouldn't plan to drive immediately afterwards.

Just a quick one because I'm nearly finished my lunch break - I've just rang CRGW and they're going to ring me back with details. They'll leave a message and I'll ring them on my next break. This is so exciting!! I may have to have my first consultation with Care in Northampton like you did Stork (I'm from Northampton) and go from there. I'll find out more in a few hours, however - this makes work more bearable 😁

Caution, Cardiff has great shops - suggest you do the whole consult there, go in the AM on the train from MK, then do consult, then shop! back late!

stork I got 5mg folic acid prescribed by my consultant - when I requested I did say folic/folate acid... Maybe I should insist on folate?

STILL NO FRICKING AF!!!!

Honestly kwick before I started this whole thing I just assumed folic acid as that's what everyone says right? But the more research I did showed folate was the better option. Also Zita west uses folate, not folic acid and she apparently is top end in terms of fertility, so I went with folate, and on Amazon they aren't that expensive at all!

Hi lovelies!

Stork - I rang up earlier, and they said that they would get back to me straight away. I had to go back into work, so I asked if they could leave a message and they said they would, but I've had no call back so I'll be ringing again tomorrow on my lunch break.

I'll write down all the questions I need to ask whilst I'm at the computer tomorrow - first thing I need to ask is whether it's better to have a consultation down here and get them to forward the outcome to CRGW.

Ah that's cool. I've already had the HIV & Hep bloods done - I don't mind if they need to do them again though. Especially if it's included in the price! It's good they don't mind another clinic doing all the investigations - some clinics could be fussy about it.

When I asked about the £150 consult today, the lady on the other end of the phone said it'd be the telephone one. I'm not sure if she got her wires crossed though - she didn't seem to know a lot about it (me being miles away). I don't mind if the consultations are going to be longer if I need to be there fewer times - I'd rather only go once or twice than four/five times, if that makes sense.

That's good that they told you that now was the right time to get in touch with them. At least you've got the ball rolling now. I'm also going to another open evening at my local Care clinic on the 4th July just to scope about there and see what's going on. I may mention to them there and then that I'm going to get my treatment done in Wales, and see what they can do in regards to scans and different bits.

Ah yes I know about the HyCoSy/HSG scans. I'm more than happy to have it done - from what I understand, they're a bit pricey? No bother - money isn't an issue with me :) it's just going to set me back a little bit more - my holiday has set me back loads but I really wanted to go, ha! Thank you for the heads up - my mum will be coming to Cardiff with me, so ill be sure to tell her we need to book a hotel for the night... I'd definitely want to shower!

Thank you Stork for being so helpful X

Kwick I'm sorry AF still isn't here :( that can't be nice. I bet you just want to start again, huh??

Blimey, there's been a bit of chatter since I was last on here!

Re CMV; I used a CMV+ donor as I was tested and am CMV+ (which basically means I've had the virus in the past - not surprising as my immune system leaves a lot to be desired) It meant we had a much wider choice of donors because they wouldn't let us use a positive donor if I was negative.

It's good to hear that you guys have found your clinics and are on the way to getting the ball rolling when you want!!

HSG is painful, although for me it was the speculum part that hurt the most. The dye bit feels like an intense period pain but is over pretty quickly. A little cramping afterwards, but nothing that 2 paracetamol couldn't combat. Also, the dye was colourless both times I had it (blocked tube on first one, but probably just a spasm) - not sure how I would have felt about purple!!!

Oh no caution sorry they didn't call back! That's not good :(

So I was really surprised by Care that they wouldn't help me with scans or anything else if I wasn't getting treatment there. Private patient or not, they just said no, so I had my meeting with the donor team at care, Amh and follicle scan there, and was due my consultation there tomorrow, but cancelled it as I'm Wales bound. I requested all my paperwork for tests I'd paid for and said I was getting treatment elsewhere. And luckily I found a sonography clinic in MK, so can get my pre treatment scans done there.

I was disappointed in how officious Care were, and how you are charged for every little thing. But I know people who have been with them and really like them, so I guess it's horses for courses! I just didn't click with them at all.

I certainly haven't been charged for a 15min conversation with CRGW, I'm assuming the big pre treatment meeting, which will also be bloods and paperwork and official consultation all in one, that's when they will charge me. Of course, I had already had a 90min conversation and treatment plan agreed with Care, so who knows. Just keep an open mind and keep asking your questions! And if I were you I would do the full consultation with your preferred clinic. I found care suggested I needed tests that I didn't need based on my treatment requirements, and we're really really bad about getting back to me.

Hycosy, is £400 at care I think.

Hope the call goes well!

Just a comment, no offense meant: when I started with my tests and treatment I gawped at each charge - like the money I paid for the blood tests, consults and so on. Now - and I swear I am not a secret milliionaire - I just cough up the readies. I have surrendered to this costing MUCHO money. This attitude helps me to minimise anxiety - which believe me is high enough.

Also after the fiasco of doing bloods with the NHS I am willing to pay £200 each time just to get the results the same day and not 6 weeks later where it turns out they did not even do the complete
thyroid check!!!!!

hoping, what you say about a wider choice of donors with a positive CMV is just what I needed to hear! DP just got hers back positive and I was wondering.

The nurses at our clinic are really lovely, but they are a bit casual, so if you ask anything like 'is that good or bad' they tend to be a bit vague! So we got 'oh, it just means you had the virus but it doesn't make any difference,' which left me a bit confused.

kwick, that's making me feel better about the money too! Waiting six weeks when they'd not done a test properly would make me furious.

I'm feeling a bit odd today. I've just been on the phone with the clinic to get DP's last blood test result, and asked them what the next step is. Obviously we've had a consultation with them, but I wanted to know exact time frames, as the doctor we saw said we could do IUI next cycle and the nurse said the cycle after next. I think I've got it clear now, but could someone reassure me?

The nurse says DP can start injections on day 3 of her next period, and (if all goes well) IUI when she ovulates during that cycle. She initially said we needed to get the medications from the clinic this month and start the month after, but then corrected herself and said that would only apply if we were so busy with work we couldn't come in to collect things (?). Which seems a really odd thing to say to me, but I don't know how long it takes for them to show you how to do the injections.

Typing that makes me feel as if I must be a right idiot - I promise I'm not!