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Original poster

TTC following an ectopic pregnancy

913 replies

PinkElephant · 01/01/2007 18:35

Hi, My DH and I have been TTC for the last 8 months and finally found out I was pregnant before christmas. Since then I have been in hospital and have been treated for an ectopic pregnancy. I was given a hefty dose of Methotrexate which has made me feel rotten and should induce a miscarriage soon. We can't start TTC for 3 months now which is really hard to take as it took us a while the first time - but everything will have to be on hold until the summer now. Has anyone experienced this?

OP posts:
cedar12 · 27/04/2007 08:35

99rb I meant I hope ds has started to wipe!

cedar12 · 27/04/2007 12:14

Thanks tutter dont mind you butting in at all. Its good to hear some success stories I hope wee all get there soon to. Its nice to know you are checking the thread to see how we are all getting on.
How did you know you ov from tubeless side do you get ov pains both sides.
Feeling a bit better know been over to see my mum and had a moan about dh. Think we might give the ttc thing a rest next month and just go with the flow a bit. Just have lots and lots of sex no charting etc though.

Tutter · 27/04/2007 12:55

hi cedar, i know i ov'd on my left side because the sonographer could clearly see the corpus luteum (which is left on the ovary following ovulation) on my left ovary at each of the early scans

i was surprised when it happened the first time (with ds) and even more so to discover it happened again with this pregnancy. who knows - maybe i only ever ov from my left side!

Tutter · 27/04/2007 12:56

ps it was the month that i stopped charting that i fell pg with ds - may have had nothing to do with it, but have to say i'd never chart again (although i did find it useful in the early months of ttc-ing post-ep, as i got to know my cycle)

lissielou · 27/04/2007 19:49

hi all, am back! tutter, thats really interesting, had no idea that could happen

cedar12 · 28/04/2007 08:55

I knew it was possible as the ovary and tubes are all quite close but thought it was quite rare. Its all very clever how the body works isn't it.
Af not arrived yet but have deiced to relax a bit more next month its all been getting a bit much.
Are the cramps any better Pink elephant?

99redballoons · 30/04/2007 13:34

Hi cedar, sorry you're feeling so low. It's always a horrible time of the month (AF) let alone when you're ttc, let alone after a mc/ep! Maybe just notice your CM this month? I found that it would change to EWCM for about a week in the middle of my cycle and we'd take that as the sign ov was about to happen and just tried during that time and a few days after. We didn't try every day, which if you're not usually up to that rate, can get quite regimental, stressful and unsatisfying. We would try every other or even every third day over that time. I think you ov on the last day of EWCM or just after it changes back to normal. So if you try three times over that week it should give good odds? I know it's hard 'losing' a month, but maybe that's worth it for a sense of normality for a little while iykwim (easier said than done I know). So you're not really ttc, but are still giving it a relaxing shot.

Hope everyone else is ok.

[btw, ds' getting a bit more confident with the wiping thanks!]

cedar12 · 30/04/2007 16:15

Thanks 99rb trying to be more relaxed got a reflexology appointment on thursday really looking forward to that. Every day last month up to ov almost killed us and definitely any passion!

Original poster
PinkElephant · 30/04/2007 17:57

Oh why, oh why, did a tiny weeney foolish part of me think I might get PG this month . I kept psyching myself up for another 8months of TTC again but I thought that just perhaps, just maybe, we might have some luck for a change and I'd be one of those lucky girls who it happens for straight away....but of course NO!! I'm feeling a tad miserable as I'm waiting for AF to arrive in the next 3 days. I also foolishly did a PG test on saturday and never has it been more of a BFN!! I got really sad and feel fed up already and we've only being TTC again for 1 month . I need to pull myself together as I think this is going to be a long process!!!

OP posts:
lissielou · 30/04/2007 18:15

i hate that run up to ov, you forget what making love is like, or even shagging. you try not to argue, but end up so tense that theres no way you can enjoy it. then when af arrives it feels like such a fecking waste of time and bodily fluid.

PE, whens it due hun?

99redballoons · 30/04/2007 21:10

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Original poster
PinkElephant · 01/05/2007 09:02

Lissie - AF due tomorrow and I have such strong cramps that there's no doubt she's on her way!! Really hoped I'd not feel this sad if I didn't get PG the first time but yes here I am again. Just feels like we're never going to have a baby, feels like an impossible dream. I also feel I'm just getting older and older and time is running out.
99rb - we did it on all the right days this month, I think thats why I feel more upset that we haven't got PG. You automatically think, hey well why didn't it work, whats wrong?

OP posts:
cedar12 · 01/05/2007 12:42

Pink elephant its crap isnt it. We are having a bit of a rest this month. Not stopping ttc just trying not to stress about temps and ov tests just go with the flow a bit. Easier said than done though.

cedar12 · 01/05/2007 12:44

Treat your self a bit I have booked some reflexology to de stress a bit. Nice bath glass of wine and a big box of chocolates.

lissielou · 01/05/2007 18:58

oh PE, thats shit. i know how you feel hun {{hug}} as cedar says treat yourself this week.

Original poster
PinkElephant · 01/05/2007 21:28

Thanks guys - the misery will lift in a few days I'm sure Now a question for you as I'm a bit confused as to what to do..... I am flying out to America on 29th May for a week and am really unsure as to whether to stop TTC for just this month, or to carry on as normal. If AF appears tomorrow which I'm absolutely sure she will, that means that AF for next month will be due on 30th May (the day after I fly). Now that all seems ok (ish) but what if I get PG and I find out whilst I'm on hols. I'll be so pertified it will be ectopic again. It all happened so early for me last time at 5wks, that this could be the stage I'm at on the holiday. Apart from being terrified that my tubes may rupture mid flight and I die on the way home, being oh, so, slightly hysterical about the whole thing....what shall I do? Realistically, if this last months anything to go by, then I'm sure I won't get PG but these thing happen when least expected...

OP posts:
lissielou · 02/05/2007 07:07

tbh, i would leave it then, more for peace of mind than anything

but luck you, america! hols?

cedar12 · 02/05/2007 08:25

Pe that a tricky one. My consultant didnt have any problems with me flying when I was pg we were due to go to france when I had the last ep. Can totally understand as I was terrified something would happen and I would be away from home and wouldnt have my mum with me. Unless you are going to the middle of no where I shouldnt about the medical side of it to much. But if you think all worry would ruin your holiday maybe it would be best to leave it.

99redballoons · 02/05/2007 17:21

Agree with the others and maybe leave it this month. It's hard enough to take the pressure when you're trying on a normal month let alone when you have something nice planned away. You won't enjoy yourself. 'Let it go' now, forget this month, enjoy yourself, have more drinks than you normally would, just try and relax

[and as usual this is easier said than done!]

lissielou · 02/05/2007 20:55

well , SiL has had a little girl and im feeling really shitty about it. ive lost 5 babies in 18m! its so unfair! sorry iknow im being unreasonable but ive got to go and see them tomorrow and i dont know how i'll cope with it. everyones been asking dh if im ok (which im really not) which makes me feel even worse about being so self-absorbed. will i ever get over this and reach a point where i can actually be happy for new mums? why am i failing so spectacularly at it?

think af is on her way too. whoopee!

AitchTwoOh · 02/05/2007 20:57

aw, lissie. it's just more shite you've got to go through. bits of you are happy for her, i'm certain, but it is difficult and it will be a test of your courage to go to the hospital tomorrow.

SparklyGothKat · 02/05/2007 21:04

Hi all, just wondering how everyone is getting on. Sorry to read that you are feeling down Lissie

lissielou · 02/05/2007 21:09

she had her at home aitch, a perfect home birth no probs, nothing.

im sorry im in tears writing this but i just feel so low about this. its not like it was a surprise!

hi SGK, sorry about my mood, how are you?

SparklyGothKat · 02/05/2007 21:12

i'm ok, don't want to talk my pregnancy with you feeling so low.
I hope you feel better soon, and you get to hold one of your babies soon

lissielou · 02/05/2007 21:22

youve set me off again. hope everythings going well {{hug}} thank you