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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Relaxed TTC Feb/March/April 2016

991 replies

stumblymonkey · 29/12/2015 17:34

Hi,

We've just agreed to start TTC #1 in March so just starting to look at preparing for that - prenatal vitamins, losing some weight, etc.

I'm 33 and have only been with my OH for just over a year but we're both sure this is the relationship for us...we'll be getting married but want TTC as a priority and fit any wedding around Mother Nature.

Not planning any temp checking or charting or such like....maybe I'll change my mind if I'm not preggers after six months or so!

Anyone planning TTC about the same time and want to keep in touch on this thread for relaxed catch ups about preparing and then TTC?

Sarah X

OP posts:
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AliceScarlett · 11/02/2016 17:05

CD12,13,14th dtd twice, but no swimmers :( Apparently sex is now clinical and boring, all 3 sessions of it Hmm I'm out for this month, told DH we can wait til March if he thinks that best.

Trying very hard not to feel very rejected.

mangocoveredlamb · 11/02/2016 17:28

Bad luck Alice. I think sometimes DHs find it difficult to see the bigger picture. Maybe don't tell him about cycle days and fertile times and just aim for lots of sex from about cycle day 11!

wispaxmas · 11/02/2016 19:16

Alice, I'm sorry you're feeling rejected. My H said similar after a couple cycles of TTC last time. Definitely agree you should just avoid talking about cycle days and anything clinical and just pretend to be a little spontaneous.

Original poster
stumblymonkey · 11/02/2016 19:58

Alice...you already know you're out for this month? I thought AF was due roughly the same as mine?

Your DH is being a bit precious isn't he!

The other day during FW I said that since he'd been too tired the night before we had to DTD that day even if it was just a quickie before bedtime.

DP has now banned me from saying 'quickie'. I told him he should feel extremely lucky as it was surely a man's dream to be begged for a quickie and then be able to roll over and sleep Grin

Agree with the others....maybe you'll have to keep FW a secret...does he realise how little the chances are of conceiving outside that window?

OP posts:
SoozC · 11/02/2016 20:12

My DP had no idea that window was so small. But he seems to want to know when it is - said by planning it into his week he won't be tired or busy and I won't be frustrated about missed opportunities. Although this is only first cycle. Men are weird though!

AliceScarlett · 11/02/2016 20:27

Thanks guys, he does know how little chance there is, but I don't think he can accept it. Apparently having sex once during the fertile period will guarantee pregnancy within a year....great. He's in denial and apparently its me pilling the pressure on by using preseed and saying we are in the fw and initiating... I cant win.
He is just massively overthinking the whole thing. I'm just going to stop talking about it completely.

I think I'm out because we had proper sex once on cd10, I guess I could be lucky, but i very much doubt it.

Thanks for the support everyone, been really sad and tearful tonight, TTC is way more stressful than I thought.

Cateroo · 11/02/2016 21:17

It's incredible tricky - my husband isn't delighted at the planned nature of activity. I won't mention it next month.

ButtonTum · 12/02/2016 07:03

Alice, sorry it's getting you down. Have you tried getting your OH into helping you spot FW signs? He might feel more a part of it than a necessary addition? I say this as all week I was showing DH opks as they developed and by the time it was positive he was as excited as me (shall I put a baby in you now, then?").

Thanks for the support everyone, feel like I'm going to be a look by the time we actually TTC!

Vanillaradio · 12/02/2016 07:54

Alice* sorry to hear you're having a bad time. I know with my dh he was adamant he didn't want to know about ovulation or fw or anything like that. I just told him when my period stopped and let him initiate from there. As it happened the month I conceived we didn't dtd on the day I ovulated but the day after so it obviously doesn't necessarily have to be on that day. It's so hard to stay relaxed though isn't it. Haven't even started trying yet and already stocked up on opks!!!

AliceScarlett · 12/02/2016 08:28

Thanks everyone, we had another talk about it last night, he's going to see the gp about his sex drive and we agreed I would just mention one that I was approaching the FW next month and leave it up to him...which I can see the logic of, I just hope he does initiate dtd or that is going to be a difficult FW for me.

Stock up guys! I brought opks from superdrug yesterday on impulse, much cheaper to buy them online.

It's official, I've uninstalled Ovia, much prefer fertility friend.

dynia · 12/02/2016 09:48

We will start trying next month. Still no sign of bleeding after coming off of Cerazette (20 days) but have had normal CM cycles and sore breasts about 14 days in so we shall see next week if my periods go back to normal. I haven't started temping yet as I don't have a real last day of period date, I'm a bit curious about it as I have lupus and a tendency towards fevers anyways. Currently working from the couch today as I've got an awful cold.

We've talked about whether my husband wants to know and agreed that it put a lot of pressure on him. I'll just be dragging us to bed when we get home from work and waking him up early.

wispaxmas · 12/02/2016 13:10

Alice, did the two of you decide together that you wanted a baby? Could he perhaps be hesitant about it and maybe not quite ready? It's probably just that the clinical nature of symptom spotting kills his sex drive, but it could be something more. Glad you talked, though, I hope his suggestion of you warning him about the FW and him initiating works.

AliceScarlett · 12/02/2016 13:37

He was the one that made the final decision to go for it. Just messaged me saying hes made a gp appt and hes really broody...ao hopefully this is all teething trouble and things will work out in the end.

Feel hopeful today, even if this takes a few extra months, that doesn't matter.

Dynia good plan, don't make my mistake and be too into TTC around him. Do you think lupus will interfere with you temping?

Original poster
stumblymonkey · 12/02/2016 13:49

You always have the threads here to join the rest of us with crazy symptom spotting!

OP posts:
Marshpillow · 12/02/2016 20:54

Alice my DH struggled with the idea of dtd on demand too when we were TTC our DD. It really does take all the fun out of it! No words of advice I'm afraid but you are most definitely not alone, from talking to other people I think a lot of men struggle with the pressure.

Pointlessfan · 12/02/2016 21:26

Evening all. Just checking in. No progress here but period has finished so can get back onto ttc! Not tonight though, much too tired. Zzzzz.

TheresaMarie55 · 12/02/2016 21:35

Sorry to hear some of you, or more your husbands, are feeling the pressure a little. After a few weeks/months I'm sure they will be more than happy for you to be asking for it Wink .

I'm still lurking lol, although I must admit February seems to be flying by and I have quite a bit planned for March already so I think before I know it my pills will be finished!

I have 10lbs left to lose until I'm at the weight I said I wanted to be at before ttc. Promised myself I wouldn't come off the pill until I'd hit that weight. 9 weeks until I take the last pill (eek that's not so long!) So very confident I'll be at that weight. I still have 23lb until I'm at my goal weight but will come off the pill as long as I lose another 10lb. x

redstrawberries101 · 13/02/2016 08:35

Hi everyone! Not posted in ages. I'm just waiting for AF to finish (my first after miscarriage) so hoping to get back in the saddle straight after. Just going to take it easy for a couple of months and not prevent but not actively try. If it happens it happens and if it doesn't I'll just carry on with health eating/ getting my body stronger.

Can anyone send me a link to the cheap hpt from amazon?? Grin

AliceScarlett · 13/02/2016 08:37

Thanks Marshpillow nice to know I'm not alone.

Theresa 10lbs in 9 weeks is doable :) good luck with it. Do you track your intake? I like myfitnesspal. Never knew how calorific peas were!

AliceScarlett · 13/02/2016 08:40

Ah my emojis looked better before MN changed them once I posted them.

wispaxmas · 13/02/2016 09:46

Theresa, exciting plan, good luck with the 10lbs! I'm aiming for roughly 15lbs in 3 months, which will get me to pre-baby weight from my first. I'm not going to stop when we TTC, though, I assume you won't be either.

wispaxmas · 13/02/2016 09:48

cheeky, sorry for your loss Sad. Good luck, though, I hope not thinking too much about it does the trick and you're pg again soon!!

redstrawberries101 · 13/02/2016 09:50

Thanks Alice! Just ordered them.

Theresa well done you. I would love to lose a stone but my weight just isn't budging. Regardless of eating habits. I think the bigger thing for me personally is exercise. I lead a very sedentary life (I had surgery a few years ago and had my pancreas spleen removed) and it leaves me exhausted.

TheresaMarie55 · 13/02/2016 11:07

Yeah, using mfp at the moment. I already weigh less now than I did when I fell pregnant with both girls. Am aiming for 18lbs in 9 weeks (2lb a week) and then I'll only be 5lb off goal. I'm gonna carry on with mfp when I come off the pill but as soon as I get my bfp I'll follow slimming world. With their diet I can still eat plenty and all the good stuff baby needs but will hopefully gain minimal weight x

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