Pom Poms, Placards and Picket Lines. The Berries are putting up the barricades and will not be crossed! A delightful bunch of 30 something Ladybros TTC #1.

[happylass]

The Berries have strict entrance criteria: TTC #1 for 12 months+, over 30, NO instadiffers, must have a special pimping pot and absolutely no mention of baby dust/dancing. Not that we're fussy!

Current Ladybros:

Smidge 39, TTC since Jan '13. Unexplained. Some high NK cell immune treatment. IVF#1 Short protocol Jul'14 BFN; IVF#2 Nov'14 and IVF#3 Feb'15 both Long protocol BFNs; Natural FET Jun'15 - Another BFN. Trying to work out what to do next.



Happylass, 37, TTC since Aug 2012. 3 failed ICSI cycles, 1 failed FET and 1 abandoned cycle due to poor response. Awaiting next and final cycle with own eggs hopefully Feb/March time. HATE THIS SHIT!!



Beaky 35, ttc 3 yrs, 2x failed iui 1 long protocol ivf cancelled, 2 short protocol IVF both BFN, very low amh/poor responder etc. 3rd IVF in January.



Tigerdog, 35, ttc since Jan 2013. Unexplained. IVF #1 chemical pregnancy. Currently redoing tests in preparation for IVF #2.



barkingtreefrog 36, ttc since Dec 2011. clomid bfp summer 2013 then mc @7 weeks, iui bfp summer 2014 then mc @6 weeks. Factor V leiden thrombophilia diagnosed at the repeat mc clinic. IUI bfn Jan 2015, IVF bfn April/May 2015. FET bfn August 2015, remaining frozen embryo perished. Private tests showed high nk cells activity and th1/th2 as well as mthrfr gene. Started downregging for long protocol ivf in Oct 15 plus two intralipid drips, and got pg. Third mc @ 6.4 weeks despite heparin, intralipids, metafolin and prednisolone. Last Ivf attempt starting February 2016 then on to adoption. 



Kuma - 40. TTC 2.9 years. Low AMH high FSH - DH antisperm ABs. Failed IVF June 14 and March 15, cancelled cycle June 15. Last try Jan 16. 



Lucieloos, 36, Low AMH & sperm motility. ICSI#1, April 2015, Czech Republic, BFN. Icsi#2, cancelled before EC. Icsi#3 & 4, Embryo Banking. 3 blasts in freezer. Icsi#5 in Czech in Jan. NHS cycle in Feb / March.




Sesame, 40, ttc 2 years with no dp, multiple failed IVFs, 4 ETs, 1 bfp followed by mc, poor responder with v low AMH, but still looking for the golden egg.

Nolly, 33, TTC 3 years, 1 confirmed MC, 2 more suspected. still in limbo. 



Funkymonk 33. Ttc since October 2012. Mc June 2013, Mmc dec 2013, mc June 2014. Factor v Leiden thrombophilia. Abandoned IVF Jan 2015 due to thin lining. Abandoned FET Aug 2015 due to thin lining. 4 embies on ice. Currently experimenting with different cycles in an attempt to thicken lining.

Clem, 39, ttc since 2013. diagnosed with anovulation by nhs so on a course of clomid. no male factor issues. all other test results have come back okay inc. ovarian test reserves. currently being referred back to nhs for single funded cycle.

Nolly, 33, TTC 3 years, 1 confirmed MC, 2 more suspected. Starting IVF in January.



Antonia79 36, ttc #1 since 2009, adhesions made for sticky insides & one tube removed, confirmed NHS IVF route Sept 15, TTC naturally again as recommended by doctor until IVF cycle starts (early - mid 2016) if not conceived by then.



Grin - 35, TTC 3 years, NFI why I can't get pregnant,, 3 X failed clomid attemots, 2 X ICSI failed fertilisations, 1 x IVF BFN. Doing another cycle in Mar 2016 and thinking of embryo donation.



The Roll of honour:

Pip - Quite simply the Best In Show.
Lumen - The Legend that is....

Ps no period due to injection/implant had last one oct 2014

beaky so how did you get on? Does DJ sesame get to put “All the pupo ladies” on the turnstile?

barking thanks! What’s the latest on af, has she come to visit or do we send a search party?

clem thanks! how did you get on with your GP? Taking up the offer of free private consultations sounds like a really good move.

chicken glad your periods came back and well done on the smiley. Do you have any infertility issues?

forty wow, 8 weeks sounds like a long cycle. What’s the reason for starting on progynova do you know? And what happens after that, do you down reg for long protocol?

I emailed new fc about a whole bunch of remaining things I need to sort out before making the move. There are still one or two outstanding bits that are stressing me out a little. But fingers crossed I can get through them all and start my cycle. Also, I have my wtf appointment at current/old fc tomorrow morning. I’ve thought a little about my questions, but I’m feeling a bit tired tbh.

sesame search parties needed. Microscopic bit of blood when rummaging got my hopes up on Tuesday but nowt since. Called the clinic with a little bit of an exaggerated account (3 days of spotting, AF probably on the way...) and I've got a scan via slightly underhand methods next Tuesday. Needs must. It's been over two months now and I'm not sitting around waiting for it any more .

All the PUPO ladies put your hands up!!!!!

barking I just read your post as saying search panties needed! Seemed apt...

Hi Clemantine thanks for the welcome. I'll type the words up soon I'm just stuck on a verse or two I should throw it open to you guys to help :). I know what you mean by your head not being in the right place, I was in a similar place in the middle of the year last year especially as it felt like a journey that had no end to it.

Beaky I hope that your ET went ahead and that you are doing well. ?

Sesame it does seem like a long time doesn't it ? I'm really not sure why I'm taking it for 15 days, then have a scan which I assume will be the baseline scan, I then move on to FSH providing the results are OK from the scan

Barking glad you managed to get a scan date (regardless of method used to get it ) :)

Bonjour berries

oh oh oh, oh oh ohhhhh oh oh, oh oh oh ohhh Yep et went ahead, luckily both embies were still going and we transferred both back. They were only 5 and 6 cell and both with fragmentation which isn't as good quality as our previous day 3's. But the lovely embryologist said that they aren't as concerned now as they were about fragmentation because recent research has shown it is "transitional" and comes and goes/corrects itself. She did say they looked good for what they were albeit they are lagging behind and not 8 cells yet. Oh the head fuck!

Sesame how did your wtf appointment go? When are you hoping to start your cycle at the new clinic?

Barking I'm joining the search party still hoping af rocks up ASAP for you.

forty is it short protocol you're doing then? I find the waiting the worst part, it's so frustrating.

Clem any news from your GP?

Hope everyone has a lovely weekend planned. January is so long and depressing!

beaky woo hoo for being pupo!! . My experience of egg quality is that it generally means diddly squat – I frequently ask embryologists why they bother. You now have 2 new beakryos on board and you have every possible chance. I’m doing manatee’s everything crossed, swinging pompoms dance from the floor, with extra shimmies.

forty I’m interested as I don’t have any experience of progynova. I only know that my new fc use it to thicken up the lining before a FET. Interesting that you use it before starting stims.

barking well done on getting the scan booked in, sorry af is still awol. I found the teeniest bit of spotting myself last night (on day 18), and convinced myself that your af had turned up chez sesame instead, in order to thwart my plans for a late January start. She has stayed at bay for now.

At my wtf appointment at old fc today doc said it’s the end of the road and time to give up on my own eggs. I said I don’t feel I can walk away as I can’t get pg naturally, only with help. Even if the chance of success is now just a few percent, then that’s still more than zero if ‘do nothing’. He agreed and although they wouldn’t recommend it, they would do further treatment if I wanted. We talked through the different options which I thought were IVF, natural cycle and IUI. I said if I did do more IVF, I would prefer to do so with less drugs – lower cost and impact on my body. He is prepared to do a ‘mini’ IVF protocol, using letrozole plus fsh, using the same drugs as they use for a stimulated IUI. He would also do IUI if I want, although not recommended. They don’t do natural cycle, and wouldn’t recommend it anyway, as unlikely to work over 40 (which is true). I also asked whether they might support me as an external patient attending a fc elsewhere in the UK or abroad – they would offer scans, things like scratch etc., which is useful to know.

I also read yesterday a study on natural cycle IVF that new fc quoted. It compared antagonist protocol with natural modified IVF, for poor responders. Natural modified resulted in more live births than antagonist protocol (was 1st study to show this apparently). Only thing is when I looked more closely, only 2 of these were to women over 40, one in each group. It really does reinforce just how low my chances are. Also, new fc still haven’t answered the question I asked about success rates for my circumstances. Based on the figures in the paper, and what the fc have said so far, I reckon my chances could be as low as 3-4% per try. That’s one hell of a gamble and I can’t help thinking that a better woman would walk away at this point. My doc said to me today that I can’t beat the biology of my circumstances, and if I walk away now, in 7-8 years’ time I would be able to look back and know that I did everything I could at the time.

Beaky that's great news ! I'm pretty sure its short as I go from Pryognova into Merional and Cetrocide after a successful scan, but I'm still trying to get my head around it to be honest.

Sesame I honestly don't have an answer but I will ask at my next scan, The weird thing is I've been chatting to a few people getting treated at the same FC as me and they've all started off using Progynova, so perhaps its specific to the fc ? Does that sound possible ?

Can I check the what the wtf appointment is ? is it the same acronym as always or does it stand for something else.

Also some advice if I may, I've decided to go for a new job and had an interview the other day, is it completely the wrong time to go for a new job in your opinion ? Mr Forty doesn't seem to have an opinion one way or another ?

Evening Ladies and welcome to the newbies/returners.
Beaky great news on being PUPO. Hope the 2ww isn't too painful for you.
Nolly hope you're hanging in there and the time between EC and ET isn't too much of a headfuck.
forty not sure about the Progynova I'm afraid. Could it be used to delay AF so they can schedule your treatment to suit them? My private FC used Northisterone to do this. 15 days seems like a long time to take it though, but I suppose it does depend on how long your cycle is. With regards to the job I'd say just go for it. I've put off applying for anything since before we started TTC. I wouldn't have bothered if I'd known it'd take this bloody long though!
Sesame it seems like you have lots to think about. With regards to stopping treatment I think only you will know when the time is right. I wouldn't stress too much about the stats. You have to do what is right for you.
Hope everyone else is doing ok. Have we heard from Smidge or Lucie lately?
I'm still plodding on with the stabbing. EC will be on Weds. I was hoping for Monday as I've had a titfull but I've 2 follies at 18/19mm and about another 8 between 11-14mm so they want to wait for the smaller ones to catch up. My hospital hit a new record today. Our appointment was at 12:15 and we didn't get out of there until 2:20! We spent just 10 minutes with the nurse the rest of the time waiting in the pharmacy. The 'medicine gathering' robot had broken so they had to manually collect the meds. How long does it take to pick up 4 boxes of Cetrotide and an Ovitrelle and put them in a bag FFS! I had to ring school and say I wouldn't be coming back.
Have a good weekend all. I'm planning a quiet one as DH is away. Just lunch with Mum and lots of R & R

Sesame I hope it means diddly sqaut. But to be honest it kind of knocks my optimistic spirit lolz as if there was one to start with I'll take your optimism though, come on beakryos! Your consultant sounds quite understanding and it's nice to know they will do the low stims/mini ivf cycle if you want it and the support if you decide to go abroad. How do you feel about that? Did it make you rethink changing fc? Interesting info about the recent natural cycle study. I wish they would do a full on poor responder/low reserve study. There's just so much disparity of opinion. Not walking away isnt necessarily a bad thing, you (not your doc) need to be happy in 10 years time, that you did everything you could/wanted to. If that means trying again and you can, then do it. I think we will all know when enough is enough (hopefully we will not get to that point). Anyway, I feel a little paw squeeze is in order, you've made it through a difficult day.

Forty thanks. Yep that sounds similar to my protocol (antagonistic) where I take bcp, then gonal f and Cetrotide. Progynova must be something your fc like to use. Wtf is the same as normal, it's the follow up appointment after an unsuccessful cycle, i.e. What the fuck happened Re the new job, I'd say go for it as you can end up putting off stuff like that for so long.

Happy is that longer for stimming than you would usually go? That's a lot of follies there, no wonder you're uncomfortable our pharmacy always has an half hour wait, it's the worst bit! Will you be scanned again on Monday? Enjoy your lovely weekend.

Ugh no chance of a lie in today as DH had to get up at 6 to go to work and he is the noisiest person ever when getting ready! Law of sod though as he never starts work before 9am in the week when I need to get up too
Beaky 11 follies seems to be about standard for me. I'm back in for a scan Monday. Assuming I trigger then I'll have stimmed for exactly the same length of time as my first 2 cycles. My last cycle was 2 days shorter or maybe they did EC too early

Now

forty yes wtf appointment is what beaky said, that's the follow up when treatment goes wrong. Every fc has their own whims and ways mine had a penchant for a long acting injection that kept you in menopause for 2 months after treatment failed. Good luck with the interview, I agree don't put your life on hold for a chance of a pg. And if you do get a baby, well a few months less money won't take away from the win. How are you feeling on the meds?

happy sorry about all the pharmacy faff, but hopefully a weekend of stabbing will help all those nice follies to fatten up. I have my fingers crossed for you! Enjoy your lunch and relaxing weekend. I do an early yoga class on a Saturday so don't get a lie in either - I feel better after, but I'm a right grump when my alarm goes off.

nolly, hope you're getting on ok? Good luck for et!

beaky come on beakryos! how are you feeling? Have you some good distractions to help you through the 2ww? Thanks for the paw hold. Yes the doc is a good guy. It's such a shame he couldn't help. I know what you mean about the lack of good studies. All studies do agree about the impact of age on success tho - you do still have it on your side.

It felt good to get that long post down yesterday. I think I'm now about decided on a single cycle at the new fc. I got replies to some outstanding queries yesterday and it's starting to make me feel a bit more confident about them. I've worked out there's about 50% chance of getting as far as ec and having something to put back. After that it's up to the embryo. I think I can live with that. New fc will also monitor much more closely, scans are done by a consultant rather than sonographer, and they will do more to optimise timing of ec. Also if I get an immature egg like last time, they may try to mature it in the lab (it might not work, but old fc doesn't even have the skills to try).

Yes, I'm still about. Going slightly crazy from the packing, but still alive. AF turned up yesterday (day 33 I think, after a good week of spotting), so I'll call the FC on Monday to log in my day 1. I'm pretty well decided that I don't want to bother with the scratch this time. I know AliG wants me to do it but I just don't see the point. I'm sure it's all down to the egg, and we feel v skint at the moment (and who actually enjoys the scratch anyway?

smidge my scratch last time I found very traumatic. Two nurses couldn't get into my cervix so they called the consultant in, and there were three of them shoving the speculum around and it went on for hours certainly felt like it anyway and I ended up sobbing between gulps of gas and air that I wasn't supposed to be having as I was one my own and driving back to work .
The nk cells biopsy was also leaping of the bed painful. Apparently it's because I have a bendy cervix?! Anyway, decided I can't face it this time not to mention it's expensive and my consultant doesn't believe it makes any difference. There's still that niggle in me that thinks I got pg after the scratch last time, why am I not throwing everything at our last chance? .

I need to start packing boxes soon. Whenever our solicitor can pull her finger out of her arse and actually find out whether the whole chain can agree on a moving date. I'm making many pestering phone calls and sending frequent emails, but a week after I asked her to sort it out I'm still waiting...

beaky & nolly our PUPO ladies - hope the menkul is at bay

sesame At the end of the day what you actually decide is irrelevant as long as it's the decision you know you can live with and have no regrets.

No progress here. Tiny bit of stringy blood when I rummaged yesterday but nothing doing in terms of anything that would make even a tiny spot on a pad. It will be interesting to see whether I'm allowed to start without having a proper AF (I suspect not) and what would happen if I blagged it, due to start downregging and then AF turned up. Just keep downregging I suppose? Women must sometimes start downregging and then get a short cycle and start AF, surely? You're more like to have random, screwed up cycles if you're going for IVF anyway, aren't you? If I haven't started though, would I have to wait another month?
Why is it never fucking simple?!

Hey there Smidge. Great to see you. I had a scratch on my second cycle which I found ok (after the nurse warned me I'd be screaming in agony and jumping off the bed ) but since that didn't work I've been told not to bother doing it again. I'm with you in that I think it's down to the egg/embryo in our case. I've no idea what the random 'Now..' at the end of my last post was . I was probably about to say something and got distracted!
Barking sorry to hear AF still isn't playing ball. Will they give you something to start her off? Not the same scenario I know, but when my AF went awol after my cancelled cycle I rang the FCwhen. Was about 10 days late and they said to give it another week and they'd give me something (Northisterone I think) as it was pointless waiting any longer. Fortunately she rocked up on the day I was due to call back. Hopefully they will be able to get things sorted for you at your appointment. Good luck!

Morning!

Hope you managed a lie in today happy! Like sesame I was up early yesterday doing yoga, then spent a couple of hours cleaning the whole house from top to bottom, so not much of a relaxing morning! Am lounging in bed now though.

sesame you approach this in such a thorough and considered way that, no matter what you do, I think you can truly say you've given it your best shot. A single cycle at the new FC sounds like a good plan. When will you get to start? The WTF appointment sounded like a tough experience, would you consider moving on to donor eggs?

forty how does the 8 weeks break down? I think my cycle is 5-6 weeks followed by 2ww so not far off that really? My advice would be to go for the job - I'm just about to change jobs again! Second time since ttc. In fact I'm ditching good mat leave for a less generous package but higher salary so I can save and spend the money on either supplementing mat leave, or private ivf, which gives me more flexibility.

beaky I'm on the dance floor giving it my best moves as DJ sesame busts out the TTC playlist! Come on beakyros, you can do it.

nolly am thinking it's ET today so wishing you lots of luck and hoping that the embies are safely onboard soon.

barking how frustrating! Have you been on the raspberry leaf tea?

smidge hope the packing is going well. My clinic don't do the scratch and get some of the best results, so hopefully it's not really needed!

clem hope you're doing ok. Any news?

I usually find Jan a bit depressing but I'm actually enjoying the quiet time post Christmas. Just nice to hide away a bit, and wedding planning a great distraction. Chilled day today I think, hope everyone else has a nice day ahead.

Tiger I've tried raspberry leaf tea, I've tried dtd, I've tried acupuncture... Still nothing .
Distractions are good, especially wedding distractions I'm hoping we finally get a moving date this week then I can start packing boxes for my distraction!!

happy I'm worried they're going to tell me again I need to have a natural cycle to show my body has recovered from the mc, so if they gave me provera or similar, I'd then be waiting for a normal cycle the next month (if that even happens, took 4 months after Mc1 before I had a normal cycle), and then downregging three weeks later... So I'm trying not to think about it and I'll find out what they say on Tuesday.

Happy good luck for your scan tomorrow, hope your melons are not weighing you down too much!

Sesame impressive cartwheels I would agree time was om my side if my test results and response weren't so poor and equalled a 45yo. Pleased to hear you've made your decision though, the new fc sounds like a good choice. When will you try and start?

Smidge I hate packing, it's so awful. I think it's from moving quite frequently. When do you move? So will you take any drugs during the fet? I have everything crossed for you. Also I had the scratch last cycle and it wasn't successful. So.

Barking still hoping for af to show up for you. What a nightmare

Tiger what a lovely distraction from this shit I've been having a read up about your protocol and am thinking of asking the Prague clinic to do something similar, it seems to be a good one for poor responders as well. Anyway I'm loving the dancing, thanks How long til you start your cycle?

Hope everyone has had a good weekend.

Happylass yes I think its used for scheduling for their convenience too :)
Wow impressive number of follies, good luck for your scan today.

Beaky great, good to know its similar to yours, there's so much information to take on board its difficult to know if I'm on the right track. Do you have plans for the Tww ?

Sesame I'm so pleased you managed to get some info back from the clinic and it sounds like this new FC have it together. I agree with the other ladies in the fact that only you will know when enough is enough and its not something that you can compare to other women with as each person has a different limit iyswim. I'm getting on OK with the meds so far, I just have a small wave of nausea which lasts about 10mins after a couple of hours of taking the tablets but other than that my night sweats have stopped (miracle as I've been having those for about 20 years)

Tiger I think it works out that its 2 to 3 weeks of progynova then a week then 2 weeks of stims then egg collection then egg tx about a week later actually so it works out about the same length 6 weeks and maybe five or six days days plus 2ww. Hope the wedding planning is still going well

Thanks for the advice about the job I think I'm going to take it if offered, I was pretty nervous about having to explain the need for time off for appointments. The package isn't great, it's working for a charity so the money also is average but it is a job I'm passionate about and have studied for and have wanted to get into for the last 3 years.

barking thanks for the . I went into a new cycle of treatment after mc, without having a period first. I wasn’t meant to start so quick, but fc let me away with it. I was charting at the time and knew I had ovulated, my fc noted that my hcg had dropped to zero and they checked my progesterone which confirmed I was in luteal phase, so I started on the norethisterone the next day. I think without an af there are 2 options, either they can give you meds to bring on an artificial bleed, or they can take weekly bloods to monitor your hormone levels, until they see the progesterone rise. Can you ask them to take your bloods when you go in for a scan tomorrow? It might give an idea where you are in your cycle. Hope you get things sorted with a moving date. They’re selling cheap moving boxes in lidl this week btw

smidge I had my first scratch on the cycle where I got my bfp. I was convinced that made the difference. I then had a load of scratches, mostly before cycles that were subsequently cancelled, which made me pretty at the waste of time and extra cash. I won’t have one for new cycle, however, as new fc doesn’t think I need one, and I don’t really have time to get one before I start.

happy how did the follies look today? Is that you booked in for ec on Wednesday?

tiger I want to start on my next af if I can. I’ve given a huge amount of thought to donor eggs. I do still regard it as a possibility if there is really no other way to become a mother, but not before I have exhausted every option. 2 reasons really, firstly I’m quite proud of my own heritage and have always thought I would pass that on to my child – I know that regardless I would still pass on the cultural part of my heritage. The second reason is closely tied in to my decision to do this on my own, as the child would already be the result of one donor – it was a big thing for me to make peace with that – however as a consequence, I want that child to have the chance of a relationship with a parent who is also biologically related. Glad you’re still enjoying the wedding planning. Did you manage to sort the bridesmaid dresses?

beaky how are you feeling? That that whole “ovaries of a 40 something” comment really grates. That might reflect the number that respond to stimulation drugs, but you still have the eggs of a 30 something. And my sil has 41 year old eggs, and she still managed to get pg. Anyway, I what meant to say was sorry about the age comment, I guess whatever happens to other people is quite simply not relevant to us right now. And it’s you and your latest crop of beakryos in the game right now. Come on embies!

forty glad to hear you’re managing ok on the meds so far. It sounds like the job would be a really good move. Fingers crossed for some good news for you.

Feeling a bit shattered after the weekend, it’s not like I have a rock and roll social life, so no excuse for that really. Few bits and bobs between new and old fc still to sort out, including meds order, so can’t relax just yet. Also picked up bloods results from GP’s this morning, all seems clear so far.

icy how are you getting on?

Can I quickly ask, are any berries knowledgeable about TSH levels? Mine came out at 0.7. So far so good, as I think I was told TSH should be below 2 for ttc. However some untargeted googling suggests optimal levels are 1 to 2, and I have no idea why. Does anyone know if it looks like mine is a bit on the low side?

barking sorry af hasn't rocked up yet, must be driving you mental.

happy how did your scan go today?

nolly was it ET yesterday for you? hope your embies are all safe.

seasame good to hear you have come to a decision about your new fc (I know when I am trying to make a decision, I find after a while the indecision starts to drive me mad).

beaky how's your 2ww going? found any decent distraction techniques yet?

hi to everyone else.

so I spoke to the GP, who came back with a "oh we had a response on your IFR, and you are eligible for funding". Would have been nice of them to tell me, when they found this out, rather than me chasing (which was another unnecessary weeks delay)...but not sure why I'm suprised....tis the NHS. But good that we shouldn't have funding issues now, its now down to how quickly the fc we are going too, can get everything in order.

I followed this up with a chaser to the funding woman at the fc I've asked to be referred too...heard nothing back from her last week (she is normally super quick at responding). and she only works wed to fri, so I will pick up chasing her later this week well, hovering over my email like a lunatic, awaiting her response

Oo Clem brilliant news about your finding, fx for a fast referral

Forty good to hear you're not suffering too badly with the drugs. When will you be in for a monitoring scan? Fx you get the job, it sounds right for you if it's what you love.

Sesame I thought optimal tsh was 0-2 for ttc but I could be wrong. You have the Lister to blame for the fertility age of 45, I got it off their website when I had a one follie cycle and an amh of 1.1. It is all so subjective anyway and as you know it's so difficult to get specific answers/info. I wish this was easier. Anyway thanks for the cheerleading Do you know what drugs and doses you'll be on for the next cycle then? Good news that the bloods are clear so far too.

I'm distracting myself with essay writing and work, but how long that will work for... had a conversation with a family member today who said I didn't know what it was like to really really want something and not be sure I'll get it. There was a big slap heading their way in my head ffs!

Hi I'm still here just a bit shell shocked at the moment. Sorry I haven't been able to read back much yet but will catch up when I get home. We are in Czech and just had egg collection. All of my scans went really well for a change! I had 8 follicles between 16-23mm of which 7 were 18mm+ on trigger day plus 2 others of 13mm. I used the conversion protocol and it worked really well. They grew so evenly and were good sizes but we have still only had 3 eggs retrieved today. I was expecting at least 5 I just don't know what's gone wrong. I'm so disappointed and fed up of it all. I just feel like giving up and moving on with our lives. At the moment I just can't see it happening for us. I will probably start NHS end of Feb though. I don't see much point in waiting any longer between cycles now as whatever we do we don't seem to get anything more than 3 no matter how many follicles we have. Sorry for the me post just feeling down.

lucie, really sorry you didn’t get the result you wanted. I’ve got Barry and the Spice Girls at the ready and fingers crossed for some better news tomorrow. And I’m really hoping there’s a baby or 2, already in the freezer waiting for you. How did you find the cycle more generally? And are you still taking all the supplements like DHEA etc.?

clem, welcome back! So glad you got the funding. Let’s hope the fc get back to you quick so you can crack on with treatment.

beaky I'll be using low doses of Gonal F plus Cetrotide. Glad that you are finding some distractions. What is the essay for? Sorry you have to deal with ignorant comments like that. I know just how much you really really want it, and I’m routing for you.

I looked a bit closer at all my blood results yesterday and realised that although they include Hep B “surface” I don’t have one for Hep B “core”, which was on the list my fc requested. Phoned the GP and it turns out they don’t test at all for the missing one. Not sure what I’m meant to do now. Hoping the fc don’t notice, but suspect I might have to get them to run the test when I turn up for my first appointment. Asked a friend who works in an area where have to regularly get tested for such things, she said if I have Hepatitis I would definitely know about it.