Pom Poms, Placards and Picket Lines. The Berries are putting up the barricades and will not be crossed! A delightful bunch of 30 something Ladybros TTC #1.

[happylass]

The Berries have strict entrance criteria: TTC #1 for 12 months+, over 30, NO instadiffers, must have a special pimping pot and absolutely no mention of baby dust/dancing. Not that we're fussy!

Current Ladybros:

Smidge 39, TTC since Jan '13. Unexplained. Some high NK cell immune treatment. IVF#1 Short protocol Jul'14 BFN; IVF#2 Nov'14 and IVF#3 Feb'15 both Long protocol BFNs; Natural FET Jun'15 - Another BFN. Trying to work out what to do next.



Happylass, 37, TTC since Aug 2012. 3 failed ICSI cycles, 1 failed FET and 1 abandoned cycle due to poor response. Awaiting next and final cycle with own eggs hopefully Feb/March time. HATE THIS SHIT!!



Beaky 35, ttc 3 yrs, 2x failed iui 1 long protocol ivf cancelled, 2 short protocol IVF both BFN, very low amh/poor responder etc. 3rd IVF in January.



Tigerdog, 35, ttc since Jan 2013. Unexplained. IVF #1 chemical pregnancy. Currently redoing tests in preparation for IVF #2.



barkingtreefrog 36, ttc since Dec 2011. clomid bfp summer 2013 then mc @7 weeks, iui bfp summer 2014 then mc @6 weeks. Factor V leiden thrombophilia diagnosed at the repeat mc clinic. IUI bfn Jan 2015, IVF bfn April/May 2015. FET bfn August 2015, remaining frozen embryo perished. Private tests showed high nk cells activity and th1/th2 as well as mthrfr gene. Started downregging for long protocol ivf in Oct 15 plus two intralipid drips, and got pg. Third mc @ 6.4 weeks despite heparin, intralipids, metafolin and prednisolone. Last Ivf attempt starting February 2016 then on to adoption. 



Kuma - 40. TTC 2.9 years. Low AMH high FSH - DH antisperm ABs. Failed IVF June 14 and March 15, cancelled cycle June 15. Last try Jan 16. 



Lucieloos, 36, Low AMH & sperm motility. ICSI#1, April 2015, Czech Republic, BFN. Icsi#2, cancelled before EC. Icsi#3 & 4, Embryo Banking. 3 blasts in freezer. Icsi#5 in Czech in Jan. NHS cycle in Feb / March.




Sesame, 40, ttc 2 years with no dp, multiple failed IVFs, 4 ETs, 1 bfp followed by mc, poor responder with v low AMH, but still looking for the golden egg.

Nolly, 33, TTC 3 years, 1 confirmed MC, 2 more suspected. still in limbo. 



Funkymonk 33. Ttc since October 2012. Mc June 2013, Mmc dec 2013, mc June 2014. Factor v Leiden thrombophilia. Abandoned IVF Jan 2015 due to thin lining. Abandoned FET Aug 2015 due to thin lining. 4 embies on ice. Currently experimenting with different cycles in an attempt to thicken lining.

Clem, 39, ttc since 2013. diagnosed with anovulation by nhs so on a course of clomid. no male factor issues. all other test results have come back okay inc. ovarian test reserves. currently being referred back to nhs for single funded cycle.

Nolly, 33, TTC 3 years, 1 confirmed MC, 2 more suspected. Starting IVF in January.



Antonia79 36, ttc #1 since 2009, adhesions made for sticky insides & one tube removed, confirmed NHS IVF route Sept 15, TTC naturally again as recommended by doctor until IVF cycle starts (early - mid 2016) if not conceived by then.



Grin - 35, TTC 3 years, NFI why I can't get pregnant,, 3 X failed clomid attemots, 2 X ICSI failed fertilisations, 1 x IVF BFN. Doing another cycle in Mar 2016 and thinking of embryo donation.



The Roll of honour:

Pip - Quite simply the Best In Show.
Lumen - The Legend that is....

Morning Berries, Hope everyone had a good weekend. I'm doing ok in the TWW not feeling very much of anything physically or emotionally at the moment, Is that normal ? I have a few days off work this week so trying not get too bored going to be applying for jobs and things and having new windows fitted to keep the house nice and warm :).

Beaky is DE a shorter cycle for you. How does the egg banking package work ? sorry so many questions I haven't learnt all of the treatments yet.

Sesame Hope your WTF appointment goes OK. Sorry for the cancelled cycle this month Fingers crossed that your ovaries are just having a rest this week and will spring into action soon.
Tiger Good luck for the scan today !
Happy Hope your pre inspection first day back at work isn't too stressful.
Barking sorry I don't know what else to say but just hope you get your moving date soon.
Blimey Congrats on being pupo :) The tww is the most bizarre experience isn't it ! Ive been trying to threads on here where people are symptom spotting otherwise i'd go mad.
Antonia Hope your day got better after the teeth porridge and toe stubbing 6th baby incidents. :)

Hope I haven't missed anyone.

sesame how did the appointment go? I guess you can try and use the time get as many answers as possible. Sorry you haven't managed to get going with a cycle this month. Delays and disappointments are so much apart of this, it gets so wearing. Hope you have a good journey back.

forty I think it's impossible to second guess what you should be feeling but keeping everything crossed for you. When is OTD?

beaky I would have loved to have tried the wine too but I am avoiding it until after this cycle! The financial side of things is just a massive added stress. The thought of spending all that money and it not working is more than I can take. I am rather foolishly spending money on a wedding rather than saving it for IVF but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

Scan this morning showed that my lining is still too thick (7mm and I've been bleeding heavily for 36 hours!) so I have to go back for another scan on Wednesday to see if it has fully shed. I feel a bit disappointed even though it's perfectly normal and nothing to worry about. I just want to crack on!!

Sorry - mini rant...!!

I think I have to stop looking at other threads. I know that TTC is frustrating for everyone but when I see threads of people in dispair because they've been TTC for about 5 months I have to stop my self from typing F OFF TRY NEARLY 6 F**G YEARS!!!!!

And breath.
[Sceptical]

I've been trying to catch up on all of you ladies today, so far I'm only up until just after christmas. I'll be up to date on everyone soon!
Looks like we're all made of tough stuff though ladies, on we go!!

beaky thank you for your support. Well done on all your research. Do you think you might go for a consultation in the London fc? And does that mean your Czech cycle would still go ahead as planned? I have no advice about the money as I personally no longer add up the £££ I spent on failed treatment. If it works then obviously it's worth every penny - and quite frankly you've won the bleeding lottery. If it doesn't, well it's gone and that's that.

forty thanks, time off during the 2ww is a great idea and it sounds like you have a few things to keep you busy. When's otd? And do you plan to test early?

tiger thanks, hopefully I will be able to get going again soon. Sorry you're not quite ready for stims, but hopefully the next couple of days should sort that for you.

blimey loved the rant.... makes you sound a bit like barking's berry twin....

Saw one very rushed and stressed out doc for my wtf appointment this afternoon. Started 30 mins late (no surprise....) and doc started by saying I thought you weren't coming to this, wasn't our conversation the other day on the phone enough? I said no I have things to discuss and I'm entitled to a follow up so I'm going to use it. We talked about the abandoned cycle. He seemed to think it's one of those things, there's no explanation as to why my ovaries are not doing anything this month, it's just a characteristic of low reserve. He thought there's no reason why I shouldn't be able to cycle again next month - they would just scan me again on day 4 or 5 and take it from there.

He wouldn't recommend changing the protocol in any way. I asked him about 'mini' ivf using low stims/letrozole/clomid. They do offer a protocol with tamoxifen there, but just as 'something to try' - for women who might already have failed one of their more usual protocols. I asked if I could switch from ovitrelle to pregnyl (for no reason other than cost) - he said it wouldn't make any difference and agreed to this. I told him about the problems I had in getting hold of the progesterone/gestone. I asked him about my lining being on the thin side the last cycle - he said as long as it was over 6.5mm for a natural cycle he was happy, as this is what my body will produce naturally. I asked him if there was anything I can do myself to improve my lining - he said that I could try vitamin E supplements.

I also raised a couple of problems I had with the nursing side of things and some questions I had for embryology. He got his head of nursing to speak to me after the appointment and also the embryology lead, who added a couple of things to my record for next time. So overall I'm glad I went for the follow up. I'm hoping I get to try again on my next period. I'm a bit worried about how I can fit it in around work. I guess I will have to wait and see.

Blimey yep, it's so frustrating. As are the why don't you just adopt comments not that I've told anyone myself how are you doing on your 2ww?

Tiger fx for Wednesday, it sounds like it's getting there, it's supposed to be under 3mm for baseline isn't it? Shame you couldn't try the wine, but at the same time I hope you never get to try it!

Barking any house news?

Forty you sound very chilled at the moment! When is pimping day?

Sesame that was a bit flippant of the dr! Glad you got some qs answered though. How do you feel after it? What did they say about gestone if you don't mind me asking? I don't know to both questions, dh is really down about it all atm, I think I've massively bummed him out. I saw this access thing that some clinics do which refunds you if you don't get pg. it's obvs expensive but you get 70% back if your treatment fails. I don't think I'd qualify though. Anyway, I'm in a rut and can't make a decision. Sesame, you decide for me will you??

Beaky - OMG the adopt comment!!! I've now started replying to that one "why did you have kids and not just adopt?" Adoption shouldn't be a second prize! Bloody idiots! I think people who adopt are amazing selfless beings. I am not that amazing or selfless!

beaky I felt a bit better afterwards thanks. I explained that Gestone is not currently available in UK due to supply issues, but there is an alternative progesterone in oil (pio) I can get from my pharmacy, labelled only as progesterone 50mg (which needs to be written on the script). There's also a question mark over whether the pio could have interfered with my cycle this month. The doc said he's happy for me to either take pio or try lubion. The lubion costs slightly more. I've decided to stick with pio only on the basis that I already have enough supply for one more cycle. I would love to help you, but I don't know if I can be trusted with any sensible decisions... eg despite having bmi on the brink of being refused treatment, I've somehow managed to have an after dinner snack of cheese, crisps and oreos....

blimey, beaky I think we might need to start a game of #berrybingo....? ....Although I might need my own special card, complete with sesame variations like being told it's still not too late to find a nice man, or that so and so's single daughter is 40 and freezing her eggs/ planning on ivf.... etc....

Yes. That's what I want to say Blimey. "Why did you not just adopt". Arghh. One of the people who always says it had multiple miscarriages and was told she couldn't have kids, but went ahead and tried anyway.

Sesame me too, I went to the gym after being super depressed yesterday and giving myself a proper talking to, then I came home and had choc fudge cake and ice cream. Wtf is wrong with me???

#berrybingo Just relax and it will happen, have you had sex at the right time, when we were struggling (2 months of trying but not pg yet), just adopt, you should really get on with it, you're not getting any younger......

Noted about the gestone issues Sesame, I will see what nfc come back with as the dr is "reviewing your requirements". I just can't get my head into going to Prague for treatment. I'd have to be there for 8 nights minimum for the first round too. It's still cheaper than here taking into account flights and hotel. I can't think about the costs of it all at the moment, it knocks me ill.

#berrybingo #sesameedition, when I told my bestie I was terrified of ivf multiples - "if you get pg with twins, can I have one...?"

Also, "you never wanted kids anyway" #berrybingo

#berrybingo "have you tried because my best friend's sister's cousin took it and now she is pregnant with triplets". Grrrrr. Oh yes and i call house on this one: "Hi Tiger, it's mum. Just calling to tell you that cousin Ben's girlfriend is pregnant. Oh and I saw Laura's mum. Laura's having a baby, did you know? Oh and do you remember that girl who lived at the end of our road when you were five? She's just has a baby, apparently it was IVF. So it does work". Cheers mum, I fucking love getting the neighbourhood fertility round up.

Look what you started blimey!

Just to join in, I've eaten half a bar of montezuma chocolate (but it's organic so that's ok right?!) after lugging my sack-of-spuds-self to yoga this evening. I am so bloody bloated and I have put on weight. I am craving sugar like mad. I blame the bastarding northisterone, I didn't feel like this on my first cycle, I lost weight!

beaky so many tough decisions. Will you definitely go ahead with Prague? I hope it's not getting you and DH down too much. The deciding part is the hardest, once you've made the decision it will feel better I'm sure.

seasame glad you got some answers and can get your next cycle in.

Oh Tiger your mum is like the who's who of fertility announcer how stressful. Organic anything doesn't count what a crappy bunch of side effects, it sounds awful. No clue about what to do, also, past caring now too.

Tiger oh dear, your Mum full of the goss it seems. I've decided to not tell mine about future cycles. It's too stressful as it is.

A belated hello and welcome to Blimey

Sesame that is good to hear that you were able to speak to everyone. Hopefully there is some progress next time.

Beaky At least you went to the gym. I'd of just had the cake most likely.

Not much to report here. I have my first appointment with the new doc at the new clinic tomorrow. They are happy to Skype it which is a bonus.
DH is driving me bonkers and I'm considering how I can hide the body if I snap. Uni starts back in a week so only one more year of being poor.
My life is boring.

Morning Ladies,
I have done a complete 180 on the positivity today. Woke up with night sweats and period pains last night which is normally indicative of AF on the way. I dont feel like its worked and I'm almost certain AF is due here either today or tomorrow.
OTD is 2nd March I definitely don't think I'm going to last that long before I test. Please give me a kick up the arse to sort me out !

My #berrybingo submission is 'My friend tried ivf for years as soon as she stopped it happened naturally' (this seems to happen to every single friend of a friend who's had IVF).

Yes Forty I hear that a lot. Also about people who's ivf worked on their first/last try. how many days past transfer are you now? I would think others will be along to reassure you but as I understand it, these symptoms in the 2ww occur regardless of the outcome and so symptom spotting doesn't actually tell you anything. Hand to hold in the meantime.

grin that's great that things are moving forward! Will you have to give them your clinics notes etc? How will donor embryo work with your cycle? Much the same as an fet I'd imagine not that I've ever had one

Hello berries. I've been a busy with the whole moving countries thing, so been a bit absent of late.

Forty I'm sorry you're not feeling positive anymore. As I understand it though, the drugs can make you feel AF-like even if you are pregnant (and being pregnant can feel AF-like anyway), so there's no way to be sure unless you test early hang in there.

Finally I have Day 1. So it seems I still had 14 days from my late ovulation. So I'm now thinking it would have been fine to do the transfer after all. Hurumph. Surely if I'm putting back a frostie it hardly matters if my LH was high prior to ovulation...what difference does it make? My lining was good and my progesterone was fine so I can't see why it would have been a problem to do a FET. (Fair enough maybe the conditions wouldn't have been good for egg collection, but my luteal phase seems pretty spot on).

Anyway, I now have to go through the process again and try not to think about it. in my head i'm figuring this was normal for me and previously they must have put the egg back too early, thinking I was about to ovulate coz my LH rose, but actually it was a pre-ovulation peak?

Glad the WTF appt was useful sesame. Cancelled cycles really are rubbish.

beaky Have you got any more counselling sessions left? If so perhaps you could go with your dh to make sense of your next steps?

tiger to your mum and her neighbourhood round up! She sounds a lot like mine! I'm with beaky, organic choc = healthy, without question. Sorry about the bloat, I had it too, nothing I can suggest either.

grin glad the fc are being sensible about letting you Skype into your appointment. Are you looking forward to uni starting?

forty hang on in there, af symptoms are the same as pg symptoms! How many days past transfer are you now?

smidge oh that all sounds really frustrating, but glad you're getting the new cycle started again. How are you feeling about things?

beaky yes, why does ivf always seem to work on the last try....? and why do I take that as an excuse to keep going? You never hear get told about the ones who fail, do you?

I'm feeling a bit more normal again today now I know there's nothing more I can do for this month. I'm making my way back home today. Some wifey on the train just showed me a photo of her newest grand child. So that's nice.

Hope your journey home is ok sesame. The most annoying thing is that my mum knows about my fertility issues and still does it. She also changed the subject when I tried to tell her about IVF so I just don't bother any more. She is the sort of person who buries their head in the sand so it wasn't unexpected.

Hang in there forty. Those sound like progesterone symptoms as much as anything. How many days since EC? I'm doing a few cheerleading moves for you and blimey!

Just spent 1.5 hours on a round trip to the FC pharmacy for more burserelin. After I got home last night I realised I only had one dose left. The clinic were really slow to respond to my phone message, so I had to leave a meeting early and run down here to get it before it shut. A lovely pharmacist at my work was going to dispense it for me, but my own hospital didn't stock it so I had to come anyway! These little stressy missions are very annoying. Acupuncture tonight so hopefully I can relax a bit there! Back again to the FC tomorrow for scan and (hopefully) confirmation of stimming to begin - am hoping my lining has thinned down!

smidge good to hear from you. Hope the moving prep is going well. Fingers crossed that you'll get your embie on board. When is your move date?!

hi ladies, thanks for the support and hand holding. I'm feeling a bit better than this morning now, not sure where the negativity went but it seems to have gone I think a long afternoon nap helped today. :) I'm 6 days past transfer so only another 8 days to wait. I'm definitely thinking about testing early now although I've really no idea how early is too early and the bit of reading ive done about it says that implantation can go on up to 7dp5dt in some cases so assuming that's the latest it can happen if I test after that the result should be fairly definitive ?

tiger Such a shame your mum can’t support you more. What a faff that round trip to the fc sounds, I hate it when fc’s don’t get back to you on the phone and turn something like that into an urgent issue. I’m glad you got there in the end. It’s not ideal, but if you’re really stuck in future I've managed to just about get a twelfth dose out of a 5.5ml bottle of Buserelin.

forty glad you’re feeling better. Your otd sounds very conservative indeed. The longer you wait the more definitive the result. Other berries would give me a wang for early testing, but if you do decide to test at 7dp5dt you could do it with fmu on a frer as that’s meant to pick up a bfp with 98% accuracy. If you wait an extra day, that goes up to 99%. However you do get the odd case of late implantation that won’t show up on a hpt until later on. In general, most brands of hpt are meant to give an accurate result one day past your missed period, which would be 10dp5dt. It’s also possible with early testing that a bfp turns to bfn by otd – it would be completely gutting, but I’d still rather know that there had been implantation. Hope you’re keeping up with all the acronyms and berryisms…have you got a pimping pot….?

I think the equivalent of 12dpo or 7dp5dt should give you a fairly reliable result. In my case, it picked up a chemical but I'm glad that I knew that my body tried!

Ooo, it's been chatty in here, I'm way behind!

forty I had a bfp at the equivalent of 12 dpo with my iui on a frer. It's possible to implant late and therefore get a negative before a bfp shows later (happened to someone I know after ivf)

tiger my mum is the same. She'll not bother asking for ages, even though she knows stuff is coming up, then ask randomly 'so when are you seeing the consultant?' Er, saw him 6 weeks ago. Oh, so when are you starting the next round? Already started...
What an arse having to do that round trip. I realised I've got an extra bottle of buserelin, I only used one of the two last time then ordered two more for this round. Oops. Hope the needles helped I need to book some in I think.
Fingers crossed for your scan tomorrow.

Sesame what?! Photos of random stranger's grandchild - just what you need! I almost walked out of a meeting today when the talk was of marketing to new mums and three of the mums round the table started talking in detail about Emma's Diary and what it was like to have a newborn etc etc. Two of the three talking knew about my mcs and ivf but it didn't even register that I might struggle with the conversation.

smidge when are you moving again? At least you've got AF in time to get the frostie on board, I'm assuming?

Don't even get me started on the berry bingo! forty my response to the 'my friend tried for years and after they gave up she got pg' is NO. She didn't get pg because they gave up, she got pg because 7 years later they were STILL TRYING, and if you've got the strength to try for 84 cycles odds are it might just happen, but AF arriving 83 times when you're hoping it won't would be enough to drive most people insane. There's no way I believe anyone just 'gives up' as there's always going to be that tiny little part of you that still holds on to the hope of a miracle. You've only stopped trying if you're back on the pill or using alternative contraception or you won't stop the mental.

Ooo, a Skype consultation, grin very impressive! Hope you get some useful info.

beaky knowing what to do for the best is a fucking nightmare, you just keep your head in the sand if that's where it's comfy right now.

blimey good answer to the adopt question, I say the same! And yes, carry on ranting like that and you'll sound like me

sesame glad the meeting sounded productive and worth attending.

I had a moving date!!!!! Note the had. We don't again now. It might be mid March. It was next Monday until yesterday.
Going to kill someone soon.

Quick update: Had a skype appointment this afternoon with a new specialist. Well, what an change from the old one. This guy is like a crazy bloke down the pub looking for beer and a shag. I think a little bit of crazy might be what we need. He said all our old IVF was shit and that we need something more aggressive. So he is thinking 400 of gonal-f, synarel, melatonin, DHEA and who knows what else. This should be interesting.