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Conception

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Original poster

Terrified.. but excited

63 replies

sophiekitten92 · 13/11/2015 22:28

My boyfriend and I have decided we want to start trying for a baby. I've made an appointment to have the coil removed on Wednesday 18th November. I'm excited, but at the time I feel terrified and nervous, and keep wondering if this feels weird. Did anybody else get these feelings? Or did people have zero worries or nervousness at all?

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Oysterbabe · 13/11/2015 22:58

I was mostly terrified of not being able to get pregnant, that I would be infertile and we'd try for a year then have to have testing and assistance etc. Completely unfounded as it turns out Smile

Good luck!

Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 13/11/2015 23:01

I'm glad it turned out to be unfounded! I'm scared because I always planned to be engaged or married before having a baby, but with the price or everything and age difference between me and my bf, things are going a little different to how I originally saw things...

I'm not sure if it's just because it's so close to actually starting to actively try which is why I feel so nervous!

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BubbaNo1 · 13/11/2015 23:20

Hi Sophie.. I took my last pill on Tuesday and yh it feels very real now! I'm nervous but very excited! I'm just hoping it doesn't take too long for my periods to regulate.

I'm sure it's normal to be a lil anxious.. :)

Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 13/11/2015 23:23

Congratulations bubba! I'm glad it's not just me who feels like this. I think because we've talked about starting a family for so long, it just feels so different actually living it. I'm so scared!

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BubbaNo1 · 13/11/2015 23:28

Yh I know what you mean it's a scary process.. I've become obsessed with mumsnet and researching different things. I've bought myself some SevenSeas "Trying for a baby" vitamins, and downloaded the Ovia app... Excited much lol

Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 13/11/2015 23:31

Me too! Without being weird, does sex feel different since you guys started trying? Like more intense or loving somehow?

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Oysterbabe · 14/11/2015 07:03

At first maybe but that quickly changes if it takes more than a couple of months. You get a bit sick of all the shagging and just want him to get it done.

BubbaNo1 · 14/11/2015 10:11

Yeah it does feel a little more intense... It's nice!

Once you get that coil removed Sophie.. The intensity levels will rise lol

Brocklady · 14/11/2015 10:14

We are waiting to try (due to maternity pay!) and at the moment March seems a long, long way off.

I'm impatiently waiting! Not helped by the fact three close friends are pregnant and are actually all due around the time I'm hoping to start trying.

Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 14/11/2015 17:21

Brocklady - how long have you been with your work for? Me and my boyfriend had the same thoughts, and for us the qualifying week is in march too - so we realised if we start trying and everything goes according to plan we should be safe with that :)

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Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 14/11/2015 17:21

I have no idea what to expect - things feel so good sexually - (i think, anyway!) so I have no idea what it will be like when we start actively trying! :)

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Brocklady · 14/11/2015 17:59

Sophie, just since September - to qualify for enhanced maternity package you need to have been there for twelve months eleven weeks before expected week of childbirth, so would need to be due last week in November or later!

Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 14/11/2015 18:22

Ahhh ok that makes total sense!! March will come along so quickly I'm sure :) I might have to double check to make sure that everything is fine if we start trying now too :) xx

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simplydivine05 · 14/11/2015 22:54

We've been trying since July and I still feel a mixture of nerves and excitement when I contemplate getting that bfp! We're in a good place to have a baby though and I don't think the nerves will ever go away. I'm just going with it!

Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 15/11/2015 11:32

ah ok - it's reassuring to know you feel the same too simplydivine :) are there any things you need to do if you're about to start trying, or can you literally just go straight in?

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simplydivine05 · 17/11/2015 21:45

We had a bit of a health kick first and I started on a pregnancy multi vit. I lost a load of weight (an absolute must for me as I was obese) and we cut back on the alcohol. It depends on the type of person you are. I like to have control over my life. I find not being able to control conception an alien concept. If you're fairly healthy then just jump right in. I think the main things are take folic acid daily, cut back on alcohol and stop smoking if you do.

Junosmum · 17/11/2015 21:56

Did I get nervous? HELL YES- so much so that the first month of trying I changed my mind, told OH we were putting it off for 6 months, made an appointment with the GP to get another prescription for my pill. My GP appointment came, and I ended up telling them I was pregnant! I wouldn't have it any other way now.

SeriousStuff · 17/11/2015 23:56

It is the most amazing, frightening, challenging, rewarding thing you will ever do. All the clichés are correct.

I have DD1 who's now 2 (and we're now TTC for DC2). When I look at her, I still can't believe I grew her inside me and now she has her own amazing personality.

Just take each day as it comes and don't put too much pressure on yourself to feel a certain way, only you know how you feel. You will learn so much about yourself - physically, emotionally...x

Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 18/11/2015 20:51

I'm glad to hear it's not just me. I've had the coil removed now, and just got home. It feels so much nicer physically not having it in, so I'm pretty happy about that. I have no idea what happens next, so we'll see :)

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BubbaNo1 · 18/11/2015 22:50

Congrats Sophie! 1 step closer! Will you start trying right away?

IndiX · 19/11/2015 19:19

Hi Sophie,
This is my first post I've ever written, I actually just signed up to mumsnet because of your post! I saw that you are terrified and actually read it twice because I thought it was me! I had my coil removed yesterday 18th Nov too, I am so scared. I'm married, 25, financially and emotionally stable but I am TERRIFIED!! I think becuase I am unprotected now it feels very weird. I even cried this morning thinking I have made a mistake, I wouldn't even let my husband near me!! I know I am ready, there is nothing stopping me except for my own fears and doubts. I am so glad I saw your post as I was beginning to think I wasn't normal or ready because I was nervous.
Just know that I am feeling exactly the same, i feel like I want to tell my friends/mum I am trying just to get excited with someone who isn't my hubby..but don't know if that's a bit weird haha.
Thank you for putting your post up, thank god I'm not the only one! Xx

Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 19/11/2015 23:10

Hi Indi - I am literally exactly the same! Well - I'm 23, and my boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years but just not engaged. I didn't know if the lack of engagement was making me nervous though, but we are very financially stable.

I feel exactly the same - I really want to tell someone we're about to start trying but I don't know how it would go down at the same time so I just am keeping it to myself. I cried last night because j was worried I was making a mistake, but 90% of the time I know I want it more than anything too - it's so strange! Have you been trying for long? I had my cool removed yesterday, but we haven't actually done anything yet... x

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Original poster
sophiekitten92 · 19/11/2015 23:11

Bubba - I want to try now, but last night my bf was too tired.. So nothing happened and I didn't want to force it. Im just dying to actively do something now! xx

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IndiX · 19/11/2015 23:35

Oh Sophie I know how you feel, I told my mum before. I actually emailed her because I was nervous about phoning her! I didn't know if it was a bit weird to tell my mum but we are really close and I felt like it would be a weight off my shoulders if she knew too. Why don't you tell a friend? Sibling? Just someone you trust. At least we have contacted each other now so you can always get excited with me haha!
I only had my coil out yesterday and we had sex tonight, I actually don't really want to plan on getting pregnant until after Xmas (parties/drinking etc) but I think I'm out of the fertile stage in my cycle so should be ok. Either way I feel a load better than this morning! (plus the sex was really good and different in a good way)
As long as you and your boyfriend love, support and trust each other and obviously have financial stability then don't worry. I think we are normal to get nervous. I even read before women putting 4 stone on in pregnancy and I wanted to cry and put the coil back in!!
I was never broody until a few months ago so this is a massive change emotionally for me, but just think..it's never going to be the absolute right time. We just have to go with our gut and maternal instinct, obviously this was the time Mother Nature has planned for us Smile
Hopefully you'll relax soon, I've found looking at cute babies and baby clothes on Instagram/Pinterest helps too haha.
Xxx

BubbaNo1 · 20/11/2015 08:50

The sex does get better without any sort of protection and your both sort of working towards something. I'm in my fertile stage and we had sex last night.. But yh I doubt anything will happen 1st month off the pill...

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