Yo yo!! Calling all Ladybros over 30 TTC #1. Join the Berries aboard the Charabanc of lurrrve. Bring real Champagne, from the actual Champagne region. No Colombian builders allowed.

[happylass]

The small print:

The Berries have strict entrance criteria: TTC #1 for 12 months+, over 30, NO instadiffers, must have a special pimping pot and absolutely no mention of baby dust/dancing. Not that we're fussy

Current passengers

WildflowerMarmalade 40 - TTC for three years. FET done in June with immune treatments - waiting for result... Six embryos in the freezer after two freeze all cycles.

Minx 35 in August - TTC 2 years. Stage 4 endometriosis, both tubes blocked, 1 buried ovary, IVF booking in appt in July, hoping to start IVF soon after

Smidge 39, TTC since Jan '13. Unexplained. IVF#1 Short protocol July '14 BFN, IVF#2 Nov'14 and IVF#3 Feb '15 both Long protocol BFNs. High NK cell immune treatment. Natural FET in June '15, awaiting result.

Happylass, 37, TTC since Aug 2012. 2 failed ICSI cycles and 1 failed FET. Hoping to start long awaited NHS cycles in late August provided pesky smear test is sorted by then.

Beaky 35, ttc coming up 3 yrs, 2x failed iui 1x long protocol ivf cancelled 1 BFN following IVF

Tigerdog, 34 (soon to be 35) TTC since Jan 2013. Unexplained. IVF#1 May 2015 resulted in a chemical pregnancy. Now transferring clinics in the hope of a second round of IVF on the NHS and considering an NK cells biopsy in July/August.

barkingtreefrog 36, ttc 3.5 years. clomid bfp summer 2013 then mc @7 weeks, iui bfp summer 2014 then mc @6 weeks. Factor V leiden thrombophilia diagnosed at the repeat mc clinic. IUI bfn Jan 2015, IVF bfn April/May 2015. Currently awaiting nk cells results before a FET possibly in August/September.

Lumen, 35, ttc since Nov 2011, unexplained, two IVF cycles in 2014, both bfns, waiting for lap&dye and results of numerous bloods, aiming for one last IVF cycle.

Kuma - 40. TTC 2.5 years. Low AMH high FSH - DH antisperm ABs. Failed IVF June 14 and March 15. Looking to change clinic and try another natural cycle in June 2015.

Lucieloos, 35, TTC 18 months, low AMH & sperm motility. 1st ICSI in Czech Republic in April BFN.

Rain, 33 ttc since March 2012. unexplained. mystery bfp oct 13, MMC Nov 13. NHS IVF starting in June

Beaky - all the blood tests so far have been precursors to the fertility clinix appointment. Guess I find out then! Good to know what some of these test actually mean though!

tiger - sorry to hear your appointment is so far away, I know the waiting is the hardest thing sometimes (and the knock on effect of living in limbo land, which just screws with your head...like others have said, it will be here before you know it.

beaky - glad your scratch was bearable earlier...thank goodness for painkillers eh...

dizzy - sure your day 21 bloods should be okay (I think they are designed to check for something in the blood, which if there, indicates that ovulation has happened), so regardless of spotting starting, it should be okay I think. (everyone else...please correct me if I'm wrong on this)

you are so right about women not talking about all this opening enough...the secrecy sort of adds into the percieved stigma of it all. maybe we need to lead from the front, and start talking to people we know more (irl) about all this.

barking - thanks for the clarification on OTD, didn't realise exactly what it meant I think I'll create a new acronym moving forward called MOTD (my own test date) . still think I'll wait until day 35, these prgnancy tests are costing a fortune.

clem I am very open, probably too much for some people's liking.... I find blunt answers work best for nosy people. Anyone asking if I want kids will be told that it's not that simple and we're trying. If they push they get the full details. If people ask why I left teaching I will explain that going through two miscarriages in front of a class of 30 children is enough for anyone, and trying to juggle fertility treatment with classroom teaching is a bloody nightmare. If they ask personal questions they'll get a personal answer and if they don't like it they shouldn't have bloody asked.

Along with the dizzy spells I've now got earache. What is it with me and getting ill every time I'm having iui/ivf?!

barking I like the sound of the blunt approach...I just use the evasion and deflection techniques...gets tiring after a while

To add to clem 's post, your 21 day blood test measures the amount of progesterone in your blood. Progesterone is produced by your ovaries after releasing an egg in order to ready your womb for a fertilised egg to implant. If you take the test 7 days after ovulation then that's when your progesterone levels are meant to peak and if they are above a certain threshold this is meant to confirm ovulation.

The 21 day is based on an average 28 day cycle with ovulation at day 14. You can adjust the test day a little according to the length of your cycle. I have short cycles and got a positive result on day 18. The first time I tried to take the test my gp decided to take it on day 14 and it was negative. The second time was on day 21 and the result was unclear.

dizzy if you're having lots of very long and irregular cycles it may be difficult to find the exact day when your progesterone is at its peak. I don't think a negative result would necessarily be a bad thing in this instance and the next step would be for then to find out what else could be happening.

Oh and about menopause I also think I'm heading that way but for the opposite reason. My cycles are getting shorter and shorter each month which is a consequence of having less eggs.

wild thank you so much for sharing this information about your treatment. I was also interested to know but didn't want to be cheeky enough to ask

Clearly it is worth every penny.

seasame - thats exactly what happened with me...my day 21 blood tests came back, showing a lower progesterone level that they would have expected to see (thanks for the explanation by the way)...the result of that, is that they put me on clomid, to try and sort the ovulation out.

hope everyone is enjoying their saturday so far

Just got in from book club. Very drunken night with me the only sober one . It's my turn to host next - what book do I choose?!

Arrrgh AF has just rocked up a few days earlier giving me a stupidly short 24 day cycle . That now makes things a little too tight for comfort for starting our next ICSI after our hols. If I have another 24 day cycle next month it'll mean AF will be due the last day away with baseline first day back. Should be ok and I'm sure I'm panicking about nothing but if the law of sod comes in to play and gives me an even shorter cycle it'll mean we'll still be away on cd2 and we'll have to wait until the cycle after to start grrrr. Could the DHEA have shortened my cycle by any chance?
Barking what type of book club is it? I think the drunkness answers my question but high brow books or whatever floats your boat? What did you discuss last night?

'The Power Of One' by Bryce Courteney is very good. One of the best I've read.

Barking being the only sober one is a nightmare! Hats off to you.

Happy in everything I've read I've never come across dhea shortening cycles, it's not really that kind of hormone as far as I can tell. Nightmare though, hopefully you'll get a couple of extra days on this next cycle then. I'm sure Tiger has mentioned she gets a longer one after a shorter one sometimes.

happy what a pain. I'm sure things will be ok date wise, so annoying when our bodies decide to play silly buggers with us for no apparent reason.

tiger hope you guys manage to get another date. I hope the reasons you can't make the two offered so far are least fun ones!

barking well done for enduring a sober evening amongst a bunch of drunkies. I tend to focus on the calories I'm saving and the fact I won't have a hangover the next day to get me through! Don't know how long you have between meetings but if it's long enough I thoroughly recommend Carter Beats The Devil.

Bloody awful weather this weekend, have largely failed to do anything interesting. We did go for a spontaneous open air Shakespeare play + picnic earlier in the week, something only us barren couples can do at the drop of a hat!
I've told my family the details of our treatment now, feels better to know I won't have to keep answering 'how's it going' questions.
Stabbing starts on Friday! an worried I've already forgotten how to do it!

happy unpredictable AF and timings is so frustrating. After worrying both times the dates have worked for me in the end for the biopsy and this cycle right up to the line - no days to spare! - but they did both come good. Fingers crossed you don't get another short cycle, I think 23 days would be incredibly unlucky so the odds are still in your favour!

Book club books we've read so far - it's a ridiculously eclectic range!

The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

Women's World: A graphic novel by Graham Rawle

Bonkers: My Life in Laughs by Jennifer Saunders

The Circle by Dave Eggers

How to Build a Girl by Caitlin Moran

I'm looking for something easy to read and not too long, but definitely not 'chick lit'.

Currently on my shortlist:

The Humans by Matt Haig

We Are All Completely Beside Ourselves by Karen Joy Fowler

The Sleeper and the Spindle by Neil Gaiman

The Day of the Triffids by John Wyndham

The Girl Who Wasn't There by Ferdinand von Schirach

The Girl Who Saved the King of Sweden by Jonas Jonasson

dizzy thanks for your suggestion, I'll take a look.

rain you'll be fine with the stabbing, the first is the worst as it's the anticipation. We have two women who hardly ever finish the book each time, so short and easier to read is probably a good bet (the host last night was going to choose The Goldfinch but figured too many people wouldn't find the time to read it). I'm assuming from what you say that Carter Beats the Devil is a longer book?

I'm currently struggling with the fact that having texted them this morning, I've found out that my closest friends are all away for the weekend I have OTD on the Saturday. I really am going to be on my own . Suddenly I really don't want to do this. Now feeling very emotional and taking it out on the dog, who is barking like a lunatic at every noise and making me want to scream .

barking yeah it's a bit of a whopper! Great story tho - the author is the husband of Alice Sebold. Far too much literary talent for one marriage if you ask me
Are you planning to wait for OTD to test this go round? Is anyone about the day or so before if you tested a wee bit early? obviously we'll all be here, don't forget that.

Did any of you guys get any official advice from your clinics about beauty products? Ours specify no perfume for EC and ET, but I think that's it. Am worrying as I'm due to get my roots done the weekend before EC and have read some wildly conflicting advice on good old Dr Google. I'm also now wondering if should just ditch my antiperspirant and perfume in favour of natural products for the duration of treatment.

rain the two days before otd I'll be staying with a (male) friend and his young daughter. I don't want to be any more of an emotional mess than I will be anyway waiting for the result.

My hospital say no perfume etc for EC but there's no mention of avoiding it at any other point. To be honest I'd completely forgotten and was wearing deodorant as normal. No one checked or reminded me so it can't have been that important!

Oh, ffs, I'm watching the tour de France and I still can't escape it!! Chris Froome is expecting his second child. Wtf?! Why is this relevant to the commentary?!?

Rain we were also told no beauty products for EC/ET (this included DH as he was in the room for ET). They were quite insistent on it as it was in the paperwork and they reminded me when they rang to give updates. It's something to do with the strong scent affecting the embryos so I guess you'll be fine to wear them at any other time during your treatment.
Barking grrr to unnecessary pg info

barking there literally is no escape is there..anywhere. I popped out to run errands in the week, in the hour I was in the car, there was a fertility exhibition advert on, at least 4 times....gggrrrrrr

rain/barking - can I ask what ET/EC is (egg collection?).

I was going to ask a general question in here about what people have stopped using on themselves whilst ttc....I am as careful as I can be, use natural where I can, but there are certain things like a spot cream I use that I worry about, and also my eczema cream (I use it as sparingly as I can nowadays, and have changed to the mildest form of the cream possible), but I still worry.

have to say, hadn't even thought about perfume or deodrant tho...

Clem et = embryo transfer, when they place the embryo in your womb (although my clinic refer to it in a frozen cycle as 'replacement' so it's an fer - frozen embryo replacement)
ec = egg collection.

Clem I wouldn't worry about the perfume or deodorant as it's just during ET really that the scent can be an issue. I can't even see it mattering during EC as its the embryos that it can affect. I'm assuming that ladies who get diffed naturally don't give these things up! I too suffer with eczema and worry about using my steroid cream but after 3 years of TTC there have been some points where I've used them sparingly. Have also taken antihistamines when I've needed them. Struggled through the first summer without but my hayfever was keeping me awake at night so I couldn't carry on like that. I just take them when it's really bad now and I take weaker ones than I used to take. I really believe that none of this makes a difference though, if it's going to work then it will.

Sorry about the early AF happy can't comment on the dhea but fingers crossed you have a normal length cycle this month so you can start everything as planned.

Good luck for the stabbing on Friday rain I'm sure it'll soon come back to you.

barking really sorry about the timings for otd. I hope you can work something out. And the berries are also here for you. Yes perfume and scented stuff is only a no no for theatre for ec and et. Completely fine to wear any other time during treatment.

clem I haven't really cut out medicine type products so much tho try to avoid painkillers when possible. I was a bit worried about starting up my hayfever drugs again but was thoroughly stick of the sniffles and just went back to them. Elsewhere I've been switching over to more natural eco type cleaning products. I would like to look at other chemicals too like plastics but haven't got round. I am trying to switch over to organic milk, but haven't the energy or £ at the mo for organic everything.

I had a nice weekend in London, saw some family and picked up my granny's old le creuset casserole dish. Blimey that thing is heavy. On the train home now and feeling chilled.

happy it would be reeeeally unlucky to have 2 short cycles, especially if they are usually regular.
I remember at the first meeting with our clinic, they asked me if my periods were regular and I said 'not really' because I had had a couple of 23/24 day cycles in the last year, and the consultant replied that 'regular' meant 5 out of 6 were regular. So you might be having your freak event this month before they go back to normal.

barking can you test a day early? Failing that, you have full berry support on the day

Hope you've all had lovely weekends. Mine has been jam packed while we desperately distract ourselves from thinking about tomorrow, which would have been my due date.
I should be spending tonight hugely pregnant and uncomfortable and excited and with a house full of baby things.
Instead I'm drinking red wine and hugging the teddy we bought the week we found out I was pregnant, that was supposed to be our baby's first toy
We've got the day off to go and have a nice lunch and take the dog for a nice long walk but every fibre of me wishes I was meeting my baby for the first time instead. This is all so shit.

spare it really is shitter than shit. You will get through it and out the other side, but it's so unfair that you have to .
I daren't test early because I don't want to be a mess in front of my friend and his daughter. Not so much him, but the daughter. But he's been through all similar kinds of shit with his ex wife (still birth, mc, struggling with pg women and babies) and I think it played a large part in his marriage breakdown, so although he'd understand far more than your average male friend, I don't want to put that on him.

I'll be thinking of you tomorrow .
I'm actually looking forward to being in work as my dog is still being a barking lunatic and sending me demented. Just come back from my third wet dog walk of the day. He's reacting to every little noise from outside. He doesn't do this when Dh is around. Really glad I'm sending him packing to my mum's for three days when I'm back at work after the festival (no dog walker as she's on holiday and didn't want the stress of coming home from work at lunch time to walk him and then having to work later to make up time, plus having the 6am dog walks and another when I got home).

Oh spare my thoughts are with you lovely. This is all so cruel and unfair. I think you've coped amazingly well through all this. Look after yourselves. Sending lots of love

I'm sorry spare