Candle smugglers of the world unite! The Berries have loaded up the charabanc and have Barry on repeat. Destination BFP (via the pouch of Douglas)

[happylass]

The small print:

The Berries have strict entrance criteria: TTC #1 for 12 months+, over 30, NO instadiffers, must have a special pimping pot and absolutely no mention of baby dust/dancing. Not that we're fussy

Current passengers

Happylass, 37, TTC since Aug 2012. 2 failed ICSIs. Hopefully FET early May with only frostie. Long awaited NHS appt in June
Beaky 35, ttc coming up 3 yrs, 2x failed iui 1x long protocol ivf cancelled due to poor response. On the pill awaiting short protocol IVF in may
Minx, 34, both tubes blocked, 1 buried ovary, IVF info evening June, IVF "booking in" appointment in July
Nolly, 33, TTC 2.7 years, mc Dec 2014. awaiting ivf August 2015 while dh is off on a jolly.
Wild 40 - TTC for three years. Embies on ice and planning FET with immune treatment in June.
HampshireBlues 36 TTC 3.5 years, unexplained. Cycle 1 chemical pregnancy, cycle 2 abandoned due to cyst, cycle 3 failed. Plan thrombotic profile, scratch and short protocol.
Lumen, 35, ttc since Nov 2011, unexplained, two IVF cycles in 2014, both bfns, waiting for lap&dye and results of numerous bloods, aiming for one last IVF cycle in the summer.
Tigerdog, 34 ttc since Jan 2013. Unexplained and all test results good. Currently in the middle of long protocol IVF, 13 eggs collected and awaiting news for next steps.
Gillster, 41, TTC since Feb 2012. Had IVF in Feb 14 and had 6 one cell embies frozen due to polyp. 2 x 2 day embies finally put back 14 months later on 16th April, BFP 28th April
Smidge, 39 this month, TTC since Jan 2013. Unexplained. IVF#1 Short protocol July '14 BFN, IVF#2 Nov'14 and IVF#3 Feb '15 both Long protocol BFNs. High NK cells immune treatment. 2 frosties due to be put back in natural FET in May or June.
Kuma - 40. TTC 2.5 years. Low AMH high FSH - DH antisperm ABs. Failed IVF June 14 and March 15. Looking to change clinic and try another natural cycle in June 2015.
Lucieloos, 35, TTC 18 months, low AMH & sperm motility. 1st ICSI in Czech Republic in April 2015. Awaiting results.
Barkingtreefrog, 35, ttc since Dec 2011. Clomid bfp summer 2013, mc @ 7 weeks. IUI bfp summer 2014, mc @ 7 weeks. Diagnosed with factor v leiden thrombophilia (but
not thought to be the cause of the mc's as they were too early). Failed IUI January 2015, failed IVF March 2015. No further NHS help. Going private for nk cells testing and a scratch before putting the frosties back, hopefully this summer.
Rain, 33 ttc since March 2012. unexplained. mystery bfp oct 13, MMC Nov 13. NHS IVF starting in June
Spare planning FET with remaining frosties shortly
Pont 1st IVF in Czech Republic in July.

Well, I've stopped feeling quite so hopeless. It was a horrible couple of weeks. I'm back to the usual background hum of sadness and dissapointment rather than the full on raw heartbreak from the IVF / chemical pregnancy. That's probably as good as it gets these days. Cheery eh!

X post earlier beaky nope they didn't redo LH / FSH etc. I think they were a bit slack!

Tiger, turn that channel over right now! Glad you're make good progress with the FC referral.

Nolly is John Snow your substitute DH at the moment? Hope you're keeping the swarthy Colombians in check.

Glad you feel better after your appointment Ant and that there's potentially a "cure" on the cards. Hope the lap and dye does the trick when you get round to having it. 3 months seems pretty reasonable but always worth making yourself available for a cancellation particularly as it's holiday season.

Good luck for tomorrow HB. Really hope you get to see your bean(s) and that it helps relieve some of your anxiety.

Pip - OMFG! I cannot believe she has done this 3 times and not realised. Like Beaky says more like a case of denial.

The MW today recommended that I start taking aspirin every day to help blood flow through the placenta. Apparently in older birds like myself, the placenta won't be as good as in younger women. She also said it would be unlikely that I'd go much beyond my due date as again the placenta can deteriorate after 40 weeks in older women.

Hi to everyone else and thanks for still making me welcome. I've browsed/stalked some other threads but no one beats the Berries!

Well TBH gil I'd probably be jonesing for JS even if DH was here. So probably just as well.
Your midwife sounds... well. Did you feel it was helpful advice?

The phrase 'Still hoping there is hope' just about sums up this whole TTC lark if you ask me Tiger. You seem very level headed given the circs Beaky and it's great news that you and DH have agreed on a private round. Having a plan helps so much with keeping sane.

Pip shocked at your sort-of-colleague and her surprise pregnancies. How is that even possible three times!?

Antonia that sounds like real progress for you. It's great to have a solid diagnosis to work with and the others are right; three months will fly by while you are waiting for your procedure, but do see if you can swing it to bag a cancellation slot before then. See that's where the Berries are brilliant - there's so much inside knowledge and experience to draw on to hopefully ease the path a little bit. And it really is good to finally be sure that you don't have a womb of lime jelly!

And good news for you too Tiger on being referred to a new FC. Thats the one I'm at and their stats are outstanding. You really do need to keep on top of your treatment plan as they can be a bit disorganised. Be proactive about checking what should be happening when. Really pleased that you have managed to sort out more treatment. You will get there in the end.

An obsession with John Snow is not a sign of insanity Nolly it's just perfectly normal and understandable. If the TV series is not enough to fully distract you from DH's absence then you could always try the books. I haven't read them as I was advised I'd need two or three months to spare... Sounds ideal for your situation.

Very interesting what the MW said Gill. Although I don't like the sound of disintegrating placentas, ew. And definitely stick around to sympathise with me about how itchy these damn oestrogen patches are. I seem to remember you had them too.

HB hope tomorrow goes quickly for you so that you can have your mind put at rest about the baby. We're here with you.

I'm off for a womb lining scan tomorrow and my first intralipid infusion. I'm quite excited purely because it has taken so long to get to this point and it feels like an important staging post. ET could be from the weekend on I guess, but should find out more tomorrow.

Evening Berries just a quick one to say I'm still here and cheering you all on. Just drowning in a sea of marking and reports at the same time!
Beaky hope you're doing ok. Still thinking of you
HB good luck for tomorrow.
Gill of course you must stay - you're part of the furniture!
Antonia glad to hear you're making progress, even if if wasn't all good news. Sometimes I think it's better when they find a possible issue as at least you can look to possible solutions. Being unexplained is the worst!
Kuma glad you've got a plan and things are moving forward for you.
AF rocked up here 6 days early after the last one was delayed for 6 days by the Cyclogest following the FET (so 2 AFs in under 3 weeks ). Guess that answers my own question from a few weeks ago as to whether my cycle was continuing as normal despite the drugs stopping me bleeding. Knew I was OVing around cd 8 - I could just feel it!
Hope everyone else is ok. Off to bed for me now zzzzzzzzz

I'm still here! Been away for a few days with MrSmidge and he gets cross if I spend time on my phone when I have him at my disposal .

Just popping in to say good luck to Wild. I had my Intralipid infusion this morning. The syringes were way smaller than I remembered from last time. I swear they were about 4 times the size, but it seems not. (And I checked with every nurse that came in - but apparently they can't have been bigger as that is the only size that fits in the pumping machine!). So anyway, I had 100mls of fat pumped into me.

I presume they've done plenty of tests to be certain that eating 15 sponge cakes wouldn't just have the same effect...

I hated the oestrogen patches Wild, you have my sympathies! I just didn't think that they were sticking properly after about 2 days and I followed the instructions to the letter. I switched to the tablets during the 2WW as I had a few boxes of those lying round from 2 of my previous cancelled FETs. Still taking them now in fact!

Not too worried about the disintegrating placenta. I'd rather be made aware of these things and I'll deal with it nearer the time if I need to. Lots of water to go under the bridge and other things to worry about before then.

Well I poas this morn and it's definitley a fuck you, bfn. my head is so far in the sand I'm in oz.

Sorry Nolly I must have missed your post last night. Hope your managing to get through the insanity with plenty of that and other good tv may I remind you oitnb season 3 is out this weekend. When is your dh back? Extra hug to you, it must be so crap being with your dh at the mo along with everything else too.

tiger great news that you will be getting a (hopefully) better clinic this time with actual consultation with a consultant. Would you do LP again or try SP?

Wild exciting times for you, let us know when you get your date for et! When will they defrost the embies? Do you mind if ask what your amh was again? What did you stim with? Sorry for the q's in just wanting to do a bit of info gathering before I have my follow up.

Gill interesting re the placenta, and probably a relief that you wouldn't need to go over 40 wks! You won't have to wait extra to meet Mini gill! Do you mind if I ask what was the reason for your oestrogen patches again? I know it was to do with polyps but how did they help?

Smidge great news you are getting under way for your FET! When are you expecting et?

Happy that's so strange re your extra short cycle! When is your FC appointment? Tomorrow? Best of luck with it.

HB all the luck in the world to you today.

Oops sorry Nolly that should be being *without your dh, not with.

Beaky I am so sorry, sending you hugs

Thanks HB, I'm depending on you for good news today give me some hope! no pressure fingers tightly crossed for you.

So I've trawled dr google, and I've decided I want to go to create cause I've fallen for their advertising spiel and they have a good success rate for low amh desperate do you think it would be awful/stupid to do a cycle in London when I live in the north?

Sorry berries, you might have put up with mental, desperate, ridiculous questions for a short while til I have a new plan. I feel ridiculous!

Sorry Beaky . You are not ridiculous. You are coping with a horrible, unfair situation the best way you can. Researching treatment options so that you can take charge of your cycles the best you can is a very sensible thing to do.

My AMH was 2.7 from what I can remember. I was on Primolut for oestrogen priming the month before EC. Then I was on Merional 225ml and Fostimon 225ml and Cetrotide during stims.

Smidge I'm laughing at the thought that eating fairy cakes could fix the NKcells. Oh if only it were so, because then I'd have been upduffed years ago what with my dedicated cake consumption.

(Waves to Happy) Don't drown.

Beaky doesn't Create have clinics all over the UK? Or one in Manchester? Or am I thinking of Care?

So sorry Beaky. I don't think it's unreasonable to consider treatment in London particularly if they have the best success rates for low AMH. I guess you've just got to work around annual leave and how to fit it in with your job.

There is a Care in Manchester but don't think there is a Create.

I took the oestrogen patches to thicken my endometrium. The clinic then had flexibility on when they put the embies back and weren't dependent on me ovulating.

Bollocks again Beaky.

Good luck later HB.

Oh Beaky I'm so sorry about the bfn. It's rubbish isn't it. Completely understand the immediate need for a new plan. My head remains in the sand as I can't face the thoughts of what if our FET ends in the same way as our fresh cycles.

Good to get your ducks in a row ready to make the most of your follow up appt.

Had my intralipid transfusion and a scan. There is a triple line (which I know is a good thing for implantation but not too sure why. Any info ladies?). Upshot is that we are good to go and they are going to defrost the lot on Tuesday. ET likely Thursday. Eep!!!

Unbelievably I have to continue all my meds during the 2ww - so that is the E2 patches ( Gill you are so right about the stickiness wearing off after about a day) and Progynova tablets and the steroids + start Crinone, Clexane, aspirin, and progesterone support pills and injections. How will I find the time to take all of that?

Beaky you could certainly manage treatment at Create even though you live at the other end of the country. It would mean there's the cost of travel and accommodation to think of as well. Might it be worth looking abroad where you might get similar treatment and meds cheaper? Isn't Serum in Athens well regarded for low AMH cases? Have you filled in one of their questionnaires? The Greek bailout talks are really looking unpromising and a Grexit would mean cheap flights and hotels out there for sure.

So sorry to hear that beaky. Fuck you bfn indeed. It's just not fair.

wild makes good suggestions about exploring a clinic abroad. Might your NHS clinic not offer you amother round, given that you did respond in the end? If you come to London, I'll take you out for dinner!

wild exciting times!!

Where is HB? We need good news.

any news?

Thanks everyone, wild and Gill thank you for the info, I am hoping to get a plan together to say to my FC, can we try x, so that they will give me another funded round. tiger hopefully they will let me try again, they said initially it was unlikely because there was nothing else they could try, so hopefully 4 eggs in the end plus any other ideas might persude them. I have looked at serum briefly, and I am going to do their questionnaire at the weekend and see what they say, they are obviously cheaper but they don't have any clinics near me that can do the scans etc and I was worried about the length of time if need to be there. I may just come to London for tea with you Tiger

Wild fantastic news but my god that is a lot of drugs! How will you manage them all?!

Smidge I'm crossing everything for your FET.

Minx is it your open evening this week?

Sorry for the suspense berries, we've only just got in.

So we have one tiny heartbeat beating away and one empty egg sac. I have to say I have never been so pleased to be wrong in my entire life (I don't often admit to being wrong) and I am so relieved. They have asked that we go back in a couple of weeks to check on the other sac to see if anything develops but it is unlikely and I am very happy with my one

I have to say I have never seen anything quite so amazing and I have worked in the healthcare sector for 16years!

Beaky I think that anywhere that gives you the best chance of a successful cycle should be considered; home or abroad.

Wild that is fab news about getting the frosties out and getting them warmed up. Mind you that is a shed load of drugs!

Phew! I am so relieved on your behalf HB. In fact I'm

Woohoo HB that's amazing news! you can her off and enjoy your holidays!

Wonderful new HB. Did everything measure correctly?

Amazing news HB. Thrilled for you!
Beaky I'm so sorry that the BFN was confirmed Glad that you have some plans in place and fx the NHS will give you another shit. London sounds totally do-able though even though your at the other end of the country. However if you did go abroad would you be able to pay to get some of the scans done at home before you go? I'm sure that's what Lucie did before she went to Prague.
Wild amazing that things are getting going for you so soon! That is a lot of drugs to be taking though - poor you!
We have our long awaited NHS appointment tomorrow. Am bracing myself to be told 'wait another year' but trying to see the silver lining in that at least we'll have an idea of what's happening and will be able to start to look at going abroad at some point. Maybe the Berries should all go on tour - Athens or Prague? . Seriously though think it's about time we had another meet up. There's hardly anyone still here who was on the last one!