We might be over 40 but we are young at heart, taking our supplements, shagging on time and waiting for the precious BFP!Over 40's TTC, join us here...

[Gumblossom]

Starting the new thread, Cloudjumper.

Anyone over 40, trying to conceive, whether it is your first or 6th (or more), we're facing the obstacles together.

I've been at it for 6 years now, but there are plenty of good news stories from these threads over the years.

Come and join us with your worries, woes,successes and milestones, we are here to support one another in our quest.

Hello all, just checking back in. I have been travelling over Easter and did not check this thread much, it's moving fast, will come back once I read it all! I actually managed to enjoy rather than begrudge my sister's lovely baby, quite a feat considering how I sometimes feel with all this ttc malarkey. Am on 10dpo and got my first ever dtd high score on ff. Luckily I ovulated earlier than usual this month, since I was travelling sans dh.

I will now have to eat at least half of dd's many Easter eggs. It's the least I can do for her, her health is at stake.

Reni you are making such a sacrifice for your dd. I have been doing the same today. We are truly amazing .
Good news Cloud. You are feeling positive & relaxed so this will be your month without doubt.
AF for me right on schedule. I met up with a friend & her gorgeous new baby today. I felt fine about it & am still sort of ready to call it a day after next month. My problem is I can't get my head around why I could fall pregnant & have one child so easily & then not manage another. It just makes no sense. I don't know what changed in that time (obviously a few years have been added on by now.....)
Annoying.

Well , with an honest diclaimer that there are no studies on this, the word around internet says that if you take soy early, you have the high risk of twins, but less influence on egg quality. So 1-5 or 2-6 are for making several eggs to release. 3-7, 4-8 and the latest 5-9 are for boosting the egg quality, and the 5-9 may actually delay ov, but the egg should be good quality. Max iso doses are 200, but seems people take lower initially and up the last day or teo days. I did 100 and then 200 the last day. I have not seen anyone do 200 every day

Thanks, Jass, it is day 4 today, so I will start again. If I have another super late O, I will maybe leave out the isoflavones next month. I have also ordered two boxes of smiley face ovulation sticks - I've never used them before, so something new,I suppose, and I want a clear indication of when I ovulate,don't want to miss it again.

Cloud, I am so pleased to hear that your appointment went well. 50% is fantastic, and I can see why you are feeling more positive.

Reni and Grizzer, good to see you are taking care of your DC's health! I actually don't like Easter much, simply because of the temptation of chocolate. I find it terribly hard to resist and I'm trying hard to stay away from sugar. I have to admit to helping DS out a little bit

It's great that you were both able to be fine around someone else's new baby. I'm still not good with it. Whenever I am with my sister,she points out the new and cute babies, and I wish she wouldn't, I try feign disinterest, but the truth is I still wish I had one, so have to look away. I suppose it would be different with a close friend or family member, but I honestly don't know anyone having a baby or whose recently had one apart from the odd mum at the school gate and I am hardly there. My friends are around my age and all well and truly finished with baby-making.

Grizzer, I understand your frustration- so easy to conceive last time, but not now - I suppose it is age related? It must be for me, as I fell easily with all of my children (first try,and sometimes, not even trying , except with DS3, and that was after a vasectomy reversal). I keep thinking it is due to the fact that my eggs are old, so I just have to wait until a healthy one comes along, but then I worry that it may be my hormones which are waning, or my lining which isn't thick enough, or my body rejecting the embryo. So,I just need to let it go, keep trying and hope that everything I am doing - supplements, healthy diet,exercise,yoga,acupuncture,plenty of sleep and keeping a positive attitude will help. Even if I don't get a baby, I think I am contributing to my longevity.

Have a lovely weekend everyone. I think I may take DS to the farmers market today and stock up on organic vegies

Grizzer and Gum, the more I think about it, the more it seems like there is not only the egg question, but also the uterine environment changes. That moves every month though, because tou get a new,lining. The docs in some research even go so far as say that every month your chances are different - it depends both on egg and uterine lining, if the two mach together, there is healthy pregnancy. So they claim that even with rubbish mc are infertility history the nxt one may be the lucky one, because the game is alwys new......

Separate post for baby alert - my granddaughter arrived yesterday..... Luckily for me I have nor felt any dislike for little babies, during all this mc journey. I even like cuddling them whenever possible. Even if GD lives in another country, I visit often and in a year we will be permanently returning to home, so at least there is someone truly small in the family.

Esp good as zi am still getting shades of pos on hot, and I know this is so small that no one will see it on ultrasound, but it is what caused the sporting for the whole second half of my cycle for couple of years. when it happened last time. My uterus just sticks to some cells and even if the hcg finally vanishes it did mess up uterine environment last time. Of course it might not this time, it might dislodg with period etc., but I have a feeling I am not in with a chance because of that weak bfp persisting. It is just a shadow on hpt, but so was it last itme when I observed this phenomenon. I also have slight spotting, so I guess that is why. But there is now nothing to do but wait, I guess,beta is around 10, so nobody will do anything but say to wait. I got to this shadow line within three days of the sexond d&c, and now it is just there.....

Congratulations on the birth of your granddaughter, Jass. That is wonderful news. So nice that there is a baby in the family to cuddle.

It must be frustrating, knowing there may be a tiny bit of retained product, which may stop you from getting pregnant again. As you say, there's nothing to do but wait. I hope it resolves quickly for you.

It is very heartening to know that every month the environment is different. I have read here and there that we can make a difference to the lining. I think I may do a little research on that and see what I can find out. I think I read that vit E helps, but I will look further into it. Of course the research is usually all work dog mouth from women tic, but I guess a few supplements here and there shouldn't do any harm.

Seewot comgratulations!!! Wonderful news really....

Hello all. I just wanted to say hi.... not ttcing here thos month as I was going crazy with the ovulation times etc. So although we don't have much time we are on a break from ttc. Still I think of you all and lurk around xxx

Notso, good to see you! Also on hold here since we can not ttc while two weeks have not passed from last d&c:-)))

Congrats Seewot. Here's to a happy and healthy 9 months.

I'm currently on cd28. Have been having loads of af cramps, but no af yet. This is quite good for me as last few cycles I havs started spotting on cd25/26. Not getting at all excited as I have been as far as cd30 before af makes her appearance. I am not a tester, so only time will tell until af shows up!!

Hope you are all keeping well.

CD29 now and I've just been for a wee. Definitely a tinge of brown on the toilet paper (sorry, tmi). Sigh - it looks like I'm out for this month. I really don't think this is going to happen for us . These longer cycles make it worse too as you do start to get your hopes up.

Hello ladies, I'm new here. A little background, I'm 47 and trying to conceive my first child, any handy hints or tips, apart from shagging at the right time?

hope you don't mind me butting in.

Ruth

Congratulations on your granddaughter Jass. What lovely news. Interesting to know that each month is different & it can just work out right at times. I have just ordered some fertility pills for myself & dh (he was thrilled . I'm going to take 2 lots. One increases cm & the other gets you pregnant immediately (I'm pretty sure that's what it said anyway. Will double check when it arrives tomorrow )
Dh's increase sperm mobility but of course, there are no issues there - it's all me!!
I've only bought one months supply (at great expense) but I know I've read on here it takes 3 months to make the appropriate changes so I guess my give up date has been extended......
You do sound super healthy Gum. All the exercise you do has got to be a good thing. I've been eating a lot healthier recently. My meals were never particularly unhealthy but I was prone to snacking in between. I'm always so much better when I'm not at work so I need to stay motivated when I go back after the Easter break (I still have a week to go!!)
Hello notso. How are you managing to take a break if you don't mind my asking? I have been talking about giving up TTC because it's occupying so much of my thinking. My acupuncturist commented that that would be when I get pg but I can't do the casual thing because I know my cycle too well. I would have to use contraception or stop dtd! I can't have a break & still dtd because I know I would still end up thinking about being pg. how are you managing it?
Welcome Ruthie. No tips really, just take folic acid & keep dtd!! Are you using ov sticks or anything or just going with the flow?
Wow, that was a mammoth post - you can tell I'm on holiday! Off to Cornwall tomorrow for some lovely relaxation. Just finishing AF so won't be ovulating while I'm away sadly but will be taking the pills & getting prepared .

Grizzer, Cornwall sounds lovely. I watched 'Poldark" last night and it is set in Cornwall - it is so pretty.The lead actor was rather pretty too

I would like to know the name of the fertility pill you are taking. I've been looking for the one that will get me pregnant immediately, but I am yet to find it, so I need the one you are taking

Welcome Ruthie. Handy tips? It depends how you are feeling and what lengths you wish to go to. For example, have you had your hormones checked? It might be worth doing early on as it could help, but then again, maybe it is better just to be relaxed and ttc and see how it goes. I am a big fan of acupuncture, mainly as it helps with stress and relaxation. I do believe it can be very helpful for fertility, particularly if there are any issues. I hope you get pregnant quickly and have an easy journey.

My Dh is coming home tomorrow. I am ready for him to come back. It's been a relatively easy two weeks - I admit I liked being able to clear away a lot of clutter without him trying to stop me (he's a bit of a hoarder - "just in case" we need it one day, which we never do!), but I have found being a single parent to DS a bit challenging - mainly when it comes to making all the decisions, not getting a break from being sole carer and disciplinarian, and also cooking dinner everyday. Oh, and I do miss his company and warmth in my bed .

I still have a week of holidays too, but already I am starting to feel a bit panicy over the fact that I haven't done any marking. I have a huge pile of marking which I really should have started, but I am just not interested. I shall have to force myself to do an hour or two a day if I'm to make any progress. Actually, I just want to do some knitting, exercise,meditation and general lazing .

gum I'm also been watching Poldark, AidanTurnerCornwall is sooo beautiful. Although it is not nearly as sunny as they picture it on TV! The scything is pretty spectacular, hmmmm...

Ruthie Welcome! I echo what others have said - get the folic acid and conception vitamins and dtd at the right time. Might be worth talking to your GP if they can check your hormone levels, just to know if they are OK or could cause issues.

joey Bummer about AF. Has she arrived properly yet? It's such a disappointment every time.

Grizzer Don't beat yourself up about a cut-off date - just take it as a point where you sit down and re-evaluate how you feel and what you want to do next. Nothing is set in stone when it comes to ttc...
And yes, I'd like that magic pill, too, please!

jass Congrats on the arrival of your GD

I'm a bit about my cycle - I had a massive temp jump at ovulation (which I think was exaggerated due to the threatening uti), but the temp hasn't stayed level at all, it's been dropping every day since (I'm at work, otherwise I would attach a pic of my chart), which it usually doesn't do. What is going on, are my progesterone levels starting to play up?! I expected the tem to drop a bit after the spike, and then stay level for a bit, until my body finds out if I'm pg or not, and then drop again for AF to arrive. But no.
Why can it never be straightforward?!

Thanks for the welcome ladies. I need to get some strong folic acid because I have to take a wide variety of psyccleareric meds for my bipolar disorder. I've asked my psych and have been told they shouldn't affect conception, but I will have to go off them for at least part of any pregnancy so they don't affect a growing foetus.

I'm currently taking a multi vitamin, coq10, vitamin b complex, garlic capsules and omega 3, 6 and 9. The folic acid is on order. My partner and I have been trying for a couple of years so I'm seeing my gp on 22nd of the month so I'm going to ask her for some blood work to see if everything is ok. This last month I was 7 days late and am now having a monster period. I didn't get a chance to do a preg test so don't know if I caught and lost it.

I'm just worried that at my age I don't stand a chance, which would be hard to bear . I always get FF and a clear blue ovulation test which both say I'm ovulating, so I'm guessing the problem could be egg quality.

sorry for the length of this post!

Welcome aruthie and glad to see again someone determined to have a child at the "wrong" side of 45! Lets hope you get there quickly, I would take folic acid and maybe CoQ10 for the egg quality as well!

Cloud,mI tend to agree with you that temp variations can easily be progesterone related. But maybe one cycle really does not matter and all will return to normal next one. Are you on any new supplements which could cause this?

And Grizzer, I think cut-off dates add to stress, and stress we want not. Just let it be, it is a time-consuming habit to ttc, but if you do not try,you will not know what might have been. Not obsessively doing everything to get pg maybe, just mildly if poss? I have been quite good at part-time ttc, but this mc has thrown me into full "I need to try again mode" which I would actually like to get out of...

I am back in Luxembourg and at work. It feels horrible. The hospital bills for mc managment are pouring in ( no direct billing here, you see them all!) and i want to tell the hosp that their d&c was rubbish, I want a discount:-))))

I am still getting very weak pos hpts, interestingly some days really nothing then again somewhat stronger. And I feel rubbish, have gained some more weight during holidays and need to go sugar free, gluten free both for fertility maintenance and weight loss. I am really bad at food restrictions, so this is adding to my sad mood. At least I need to fly to Estonia again for weekend, so can cuddle my new granddaughter some more! For some reason I am not getting over this mc as I usully have, it is still coming back somedays very vividly and today seems to be one of those.

Oh Jass, I am sorry to hear that you are having a difficult day. Miscarriages are just awful, and you have had your hopes dashed yet again. It would be abnormal if you didn't feel something - it must be very hard to move on when you are still getting weak positive tests. After my second miscarriage (at 9-10 weeks , also a D&C) I had positive tests for a few weeks, and every time I saw the positive test, it was almost a slap of a reminder that things didn't work out. Those miscarriages (getting close to 12 weeks) were so hard compared to the ones I had at 6 and 4 weeks. I also had good ultrasounds at 7 weeks, which made me so hopeful, and having the hope torn away is just very,very heartbreaking.

I hope that seeing your new grand baby will help I am sugar and gluten free (for the most part - impossible to be sugar free over Easter) and I feel so much better physically for doing so. But there are definitely times when comfort food helps

I hope you feel better soon.

Cloud, I know what you mean about confusing charts, but if you post yours on here, I'd be happy to have a look.

My DS is hassling me to snuggle on the couch and watch a movie, so I will have to - I do love to snuggle

There you go - anyone can make sense of what is going on?! Is my progesterone finally giving up the ghost...

I am now only on folic acid/conception vitamins and omega 3, 6, 9 - currently no other supplements.

Welcome Ruthie. You sound like you are very clued up on the supplements and also using the opks. I would definitely get your bloods done with the GP to check that you are ovulating. They may also be able to arrange for a scan for you just to check that nothing is blocked. Other than that, I think you need to decide how far you are prepared to go to try and get pregnant. Would you consider IVF? Donor eggs? If the answer is yes, then I would get the ball rolling fairly quickly. If you are just happy to let nature take its course, then it sounds like you are already doing all of the right things, and you are in the same boat as everyone else on here.

I'm feeling really really down today. AF arrived with a vengeance only about 2 hours after having the brwon tinging - I didn't even have time to have the usual "maybe it's implantation spotting" thoughts as it came so quick!! I'm getting so tired of this monthly roller coaster of emotions. I somehow need to accept the fact that we are only going to have one child. In some ways I am fine with that, as I didn't even meet my DH until I was 38, so at that stage I didn't even think I would have any children. Plus the 3 of us work well together, and life definitely gets easier as they get older. But then I feel sad that as each milestone passes for DS, I think that I will never have that again. We've just had his third birthday party this weekend, so I think I am feeling a bit emotional about that too.

I don't think I will ever give up ttc, but I wish that I could take a more laid back approach to it. Somebody else said on an earlier post how they always know their cycle so well, so even when they are trying to not be bothered by it, the thoughts are always there. That's exactly how I am.

Anyway, sorry for the slightly indulgent post. I just needed to vent a bit. DH doesn't really understand how emotional I feel about this, as he is perfectly happy as we are (and I think secretly dreads the idea of having a newborn again!!).

Hope everyone else is OK.

Hi everyone, another newbie here. I'm 40 and have one DS who is 17 months conceived with IUI after ovarian stimulation. In fact I know notsoold, we were on the same bus together waves hiya lovely! SP mum to F here :-)

Anyway I'm still BFing morning and evening, we both love it and don't want to stop. I haven't started my periods again yet and have just finished a course of duphaston to kick-start them. I feel decidedly premenstrual, so we'll see how things go in the next few days. Then it's a case of shagging at the right time while I decide if I can face the emotional upheaval of actual treatment again. So just saying hi at the moment!

Thanks for all the replies. My DP doesn't want to go down the ivf route and I'm sort of with him on that. It's just a case of us attempting to be healthy, take some vits and dtd as much as we can at the right time. I'm taking enough vits to make me rattle, and I just have to cope they're helping. The most I can get my DP to take is a multi vit, but I guess it's better than nothing.

I'm going to ask my gp to arrange some bloods to check hormone levels, just to check things are ok, and I'm not starting the menopause, though I know of at least two women (friend and my DPs grandmother) who have fallen pregnant at the early stage of menopause. I may be grasping at straws, but it's all I have.

Hello everyone and sorry for being AWOL; I am so busy at the moment doing SMEP

Welcome Ruthie and Dinah, I hope your stay here will be short for all the right reasons. Dinah, what stimulation did you receive? Was it Clomid or Letrizole? May I ask the reason for having gone down the IUI route and were you ovulating yourself without the stimulation? Sorry to bombard you with questions when you are new

Cloud, I love looking at charts! I must be weird. I'm surprised FF have pinpointed ov at CD15, I would have thought CD17 (using the 'three over six' rule for temps). Your second positive opk: was it darker than the day before? I only ask because I got a positive yesterday where the test line was exactly the same colour and depth as the control, so I noted it down as a positive LH surge. However, today I have had a super-strong line which is much darker than the control. If an equal line denotes an LH surge and a darker-than-control means the same, which day do we take as the starting point for calculating when ovulation will be?

Jass, you sound so deflated and depressed. I am sorry you feel this way and hope that your tests become negative really soon.

Joey, I feel exactly the same; I so want a sibling for my DD and don't want her growing up and only child

AFM, nothing happening except exhausting SMEP. We have DTD every other day leading up to yesterday's positive opk and so we are now at it every day. I am determined to have sex two days beyond FF's confirmation of ov, I just know we've been stopping too soon.

Hi flotillas, no prob. My stimulation was Fostimon. We were very lucky and it worked first time. IUI was on the advice of our fertility specialist who advised six goes of IUI before IVF with donor eggs. I was ovulating but my eggs were a bit old and crap (technical terms...).

Cloud, could it just have been a low quality egg, is corpus luteum not great and so not enough progesterone release for this one freak egg rather than a global progesterone problem?

I wonder if I'll ever catch up on the two weeks I missed on the thread or if I should just jump back in where we are now?

Welcome Dinah and Ruthie.

I'm on cd25, 14dpo, but a weird cycle. Ff took until 5dpo to pinpoint ovulation and temps are all over the place. Waiting for the dreaded AF basically, no hope.