Time for a new thread, a sad welcome to any newcomers.
Introducing myself:
Name: Town?
Age: 34
Angel: DD 'G' born Feb14 at 27w by EMCS, lived 12 days (oxygen starvation at birth due to cord prolapse)?
Other DC: none?
TTC/Rainbow: TTC since Nov14, currently incubating a pea
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Conception
Angels and Rainbows - remembering our angels and praying for rainbows (thread2)
545 replies
townsender · 25/01/2015 00:08
OP posts:
Ducky23 ·
02/02/2015 13:30
Lake, am keeping everything crossed for you. My first positive after dd was so faint only I could see it, no one else could! I sometimes wonder whether there was no line but my body just knew 
I found the first response to be the best x
townsender ·
02/02/2015 21:38
Ducky, a big hug from me. Vivid memories, so painful to remember but equally painful to not remember at this time of year.
April, glad to hear you've got some good friends in your new home, as that will make all the difference. Hopefully you can find something interesting to do after Feb. I signed up to a cake decorating course one morning a week, and also did 1 day a week volunteer gardening at my local national trust property. The though of being on my own with nothing to do 5 days a week while on mat leave absolutely terrified me.
If you end up getting pg soon then you can always cancel anything you've signed up for – you won't care as you'll be so happy to be pg!
Lake and Vicky, I am so excited for you both. A faint line is definitely still a line. Post a piccie if you like, and we can take a look (mind you, I'm pretty rubbish at line spotting!). We'll be due within a couple of weeks of each other! 
Cake you're amazing. So patient 
So, I phoned the hospital today. After 3 calls, they eventually confirmed they had received my self referral, and I was in the system, but no booking in appointment date yet. I'm down to have it with the specialist (bereavement) midwife, which is good, but in the normal course of time, ie 8-12 weeks. No mention of a consultant. I'm not entirely sure what to think of that, but I will give it until Friday and then give them another call. Did anyone else get special care in 1st trimester (assuming no mc history), or was it only 2nd and 3rd trimester when the extra care kicks in?
I've also booked myself the Harmony test which comes with 2 scans, one at 10 weeks and one at 12 weeks. So at least I know I'm going to get scanned on 28th Feb, even if I do have to pay for it myself. We had the Harmony test with 'G' after I came back as 'high but not really high' (1 in 130) chance of Downs after the NHS screening. She was fine, but it was a stressful 2 week wait, so we're just going straight for the test this time (with the added bonus of 2 scans!).
OP posts:
LittleTulip ·
02/02/2015 21:58
Hello again!
Sorry I have been absent. Thanks for starting the new thread town, think this might be the 3rd or maybe 4th Angels and Rainbows thread I've been on, I'm a proper old timer! Fingers crossed this is the thread that'll give us all good news.
Welcome to our newbies, I am so sorry to hear of your losses. You are most definitely in the best place for support.
Cake I'm glad you finally had your appointment, I understand you wanting to wait until your DH is ready, it is so difficult when sometimes all we want to be is pregnant!
Town, Lake and Vicky, gentle congratulations to you all! It is so unreal isn't it getting that bfp?
Kayleigh to answer a question you posted earlier, I had an early scan at 7 weeks, then the consultant wanted to scan me at 10 weeks. The next time the consultant wants to see me is after my 20 week scan. I have a brilliant team I am seeing a specialist midwife, and she has pretty much said I can go and see her whenever.
Ducky I am so glad your little man is home and getting better. Sorry you are feeling so sad about your angel, are you going to mark the day by doing anything? I planted a tree on 'A's birthday
Giant I think you mentioned age... I started TTC when I was 28, conceived and had a still birth at 30. I'm now 32, I really don't think age has much to do with it. It takes me ages and ages to conceive!
Critter how are you lovely?
AFM all going ok. I am now 17+1, have been feeling movements for a couple of weeks now. Last weekend I woke up feeling nothing, freaked out and booked myself in for a private scan. Scan was fine - phew! In my head i knew I was being ridiculous, you're not supposed to get regular movements at 16 weeks but I just had to know baby was ok. Not sure how I'm going to cope with this when the movements do get regular. I am trying to take each day at a time, my next milestone is the GTT next week and quick ante-natal check. I have requested the GTT test as I want all bases covered!
I am still hiding my pregnancy at work. My manager and a couple of close colleagues know but that is it, I really cant be doing with all the congratulations! And talking about the pregnancy - Aaarrghhh 
Waves and hugs to all the others on the chat, sorry it's another quickie from me 
Ducky23 ·
03/02/2015 13:17
Vicky, congratulations
Cake hope your appointment goes well.
Town that's good that it is with the bereavement midwife. My midwife managed to get me an early scan at 6 weeks and I saw the consultant at 9 weeks but he was pretty useless... Didn't see a consultant again until 26 weeks and that was only after going to hospital in tears, the bereavement midwife came to see me and sorted it. Apart from that there was nothing extra. I think sometimes they expect us not to worry until later in the pregnancy as that is when we had our losses, well that's the impression I got. I needed to fight for extra care but when I got it I couldn't fault it. How are you feeling?
Little I think I'm going to just get her some nice flowers and go to her grave with ds. 
. In regards to the movement I had the same thing! At 17 weeks I called the midwife (well actually I got so worked up my mom had to leave work and come to mine and call for me ) she was lovely and came straight round and listened to the heartbeat. So nerve wracking isn't it! I didn't get regular movement until late
Hugs to everyone x
kayleighferrie1985 ·
03/02/2015 19:15
ducky sending you hugs. The next few days will undoubtedly be hard. I hope your visit to the grave isn't too painful for you
lake and vicky congratulations to you both
AFM kitchen STILL not finished- not helped by the cooker very nearly blowing up on Thursday night (luckily no actual damage, and new cooker sorted my the landlord very quickly). My midwife rang me yesterday and my second urine sample was fine so good to know i don't have an infection
Ducky23 ·
03/02/2015 20:11
Thanks everyone.
Vicky, I think it depends. You hve a positive and if that changes (fingers tightly crossed it doesn't) would DH be supportive? I told my husband straight away, only because I had to tell my mom as if anything were to happen I would want them for support. But, if everything goes smoothly then there would be no harm in telling him.
I have no idea what I'm waffling on about any more
townsender ·
03/02/2015 20:47
Ducky thanks for the info, that about sums up my expectation of consultant care so I will make sure I shout as necessary. For me I think the only critical bit is when are they going to give me antibiotics for the strep B.
Tulip hello my lovely! That was a long post, no guilt required. I'm amazed you are managing to hide it from work at 17w, lots of scarfs and baggy clothes I assume? Sounds like you're doing really well, and I'm pleased that your experience with the specialist midwife is so good. Fingers crossed mine will be good too (worried I have got off to a bad start with her, as I phoned her so often in summer to pester about the pre-conception scan which they messed up my appointment for).
Lake don't worry about no symptoms, think they're meant to come around 6 weeks and anything earlier is probably all in the mind!
Vicky I would tell him. I had an issue today (more to come) and nearly didn't call DP because I didn't want to worry him. Then I called him anyway, and I was very glad I did. If I'd waited and told him later he'd have been really upset that I'd had to go through stuff on my own, for the sake of 'not disturbing' him.
I've had a really shitty day. Got to work, went to the loo, found blood. More than spotting - kind of day 3 period blood. So I panicked, told my supervisor I wasn't feeling well and was going home, then got a taxi to the local hospital and presented at A&E. Luckily they weren't too busy, so I got seen fairly quickly, urine and blood sample, then internal examination. The blood had eased off a bit then and she confirmed my womb was still closed. Luckily she managed to squeeze me in for a scan that morning (usually I would have to come back but I did kind of play the bereaved mum card). Scan showed everything was in the right place (not ectopic) and nothing obvious wrong - but no sign of fetal pole or heartbeat. The sonographer wasn't worried, she said it was too early, but the consultant afterwards said 'I'm so sorry' (as in 'I'm so sorry there's no heartbeat') which got me all worried again .
So, long story short, I've had a scan, everything looks normal, but I have to go back for another one to find a heartbeat. And I'm still bleeding (but only spotting now).
I was exhausted when I got back from the hospital, and went for a nap before I started working from home. I'm kind of positive - really I know more now than I did at the start of today, and I don't have pain, and the bleeding is now spotting, so I think all the signs are good. Shit, I could have done without all this though. Work seem ok, but I think it'll make it more likely my team will guess, we work so closely together.
Next scan is either next Thursday at the hospital near work, or I might try and see if I can get a slightly earlier one at the hospital near home (where I'm booking into).
Wow! Long story. Nice to rant though. Thank y'all for listening.
OP posts:
Ducky23 ·
05/02/2015 20:54
Hope there's no more bleeding town.
Hugs to you madem.
Well it's dd's birthday. Was easier than I expected (with the large wine) not as bad as the build up 
X
townsender ·
05/02/2015 21:40
Ducky, checked in to send you for today. Glad it was ok.
No more bleeding, phew. I'll stop the daily updates eventually
OP posts:
vicky123uk ·
05/02/2015 22:09
ducky I'm glad wine helped see you through 
town I'm really glad things have calmed down today, fingers crossed!
AFm, well I told dh last night and he said I shouldn't have worried about telling him that it was silly of me bless him. Hopefully it's a sticky one, time will tell!
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townsender ·
07/02/2015 16:15
Anna Hello!! Glad to hear you're ok and back to work. I found returning to work such a major (positive) step, really helped me start to feel almost normal again. Sorry to hear you're still having health issues, thats a crappy hand life has thrown you and I really hope you start to improve soon. Did your doctor give you any ideas how you could boost your immune system - diet or vitamins or anything?
Your necklace sounds lovely - giving me some ideas now.
Patience isn't my strong point, either! Small projects/distractions and mini milestones seem to be the only thing that works for me. 1st Trimester progressing really slowly, but I'm sure 2nd trimester will be even worse for me.
Vicky, told ya . When will you tell your parents? We think we're going to wait until 12 week scan, but its a long way off. It's that same issue, isn't it - don't want to tell them in case they worry, but then I worry that if we tell them at 12 weeks they'll be a bit miffed that we left it so long?!
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