On The 12th Day of Xmas My Viroids Gave To Me 12 OPKs 11 New Positions 10 Symptom Spots 9 Pics Of Cats 8 TMI's 7 Shag Stories 6 Cervix Positions 5 Temp Charts 4 Hooyas 3 DPO 2 Gx and an Xmas BFP!JS 35

[jellypi3]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't?

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedinging!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

Doing A lemon = Testing WAAAAAAAY to early!

The link to Part 33 is here

The current Grads Fred is here

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is here. We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.

Happy Christmas shagging, shaggers!

Get your disco pants out Batfish

Just added you to the group

Right i've just updated names list in fb group - there is one viroid i can't find nickname for so can they fb message me and tell me who they are!!

I've also added who the grads are (as I struggle to keep up with the bfps!) so if i've not put that you're a grad and you are please let me know - i don't mean to offend, i'm just rubbish at remembering as we all cross lurk/post so much!

I want to join the FB group... Now I'm on a laptop I should be able to figure this out... Haha.

Right, think I messaged both purple and lil as I think I read you were both admins.. hoping I'm not outing myself

You're totally outing yourself ain, but only to us, not the world!

Thanks to all those who told me to hang on and have icing faith....finally arrived on day 16 :) thanks for peeling me off the ceiling, lil, jelly and others too numerous to count! Maybe this body does work after all.....

Glad you've iced deeply hope you've been jsing!

lil I can cope with that. I'm loving seeing real people linked to the usernames, but will take me a while to know who is who without looking back at the pinned post.

In not so happy news (sorry to put a bit of a downer on the thread...) I found out today that my dad has been in hospital this week for a problem related to his lungs. He wouldn't tell me much, and tried to brush it off like it was just something little that he could get over like a cold or something. I know he's trying to make sure that I don't worry, but I can't help it. It doesn't help that I have the house completely to myself tonight. As in, I don't even have the dog here. I use the dog as a bit of a cuddly toy when I'm feeling down. He doesn't seem to mind But as DH and I were both planning on being out late we'd arranged for him to be looked after for the evening.

that sounds funny "iced deeply" not sure my body does that hehe :-)

sorry to hear about your dad ain bad timing that you're on your own?! you're right about our furry family being great comfort! is DH staying out?

poochie he's actually just messaged me saying he's on his way home. I've not told him about my dad yet. He's also a tad tipsy by the sound of (it was his works Christmas night out after all...) so I doubt I'll tell him tonight.

To be honest I think I'm totally exhausted, and being hit with a lot of bad news that I don't know how to cope with at the min. I need some time to switch off for a while... 5 more working days... Not that Christmas is a time to switch off with my family. We have big family get togethers which I absolutely love, but doesn't give much scope for rest...

I get you on that one!! glad he's on the way home, even if it's just to cuddle up to! hope Dad gets better soon x think you deserve another hug!!!! x

ain hopefully he really is as OK as he says he is. hugs for you though

Aww ainat sorry to hear your dad hasn't been well! hopefully it really is nothing much like he is making out! sounds like a tough time for you all round

I'm a bit worried as have a smear test this morning and am worried the doc will be able to see evidence of last night's cape action - cringe!!

Yay deeply know you had it in you lass

ain sorry to hear :( it's so stressful when family members are ill like that. My nan gets the results of her haematology tests later this week, and I'm trying not to think of it but it's so hard. Big hugs to you though.

purple how are you doing? Any new symptoms?

I had the urge to tell my nan we are TTC yesterday. I never keep anything from her but when she comes round I do a mad dash to check all OPK's and PG tests are well hidden (she cleans my house for me once a week). Have any of you told anyone you are tryin?

I am a worrier. I think my family sometimes try to keep things from me to stop me worrying, but it doesn't help.

This morning I have cramps again (I always seem to be getting them in the morning and they tend to wear off during the day, but then next morning they are back again...) and am feeling a little nauseous. I don't think it's anything pg/af related though. I've been having the cramps every morning for nearly 2 weeks now.

jelly I hope your nans results come back okay. I'll keep my gx for her.

I'm debating going to Tesco to get some bits in, but I really just can't be bothered to move. I can't go tomorrow though and on a Saturday I'd rather go earlier than later. I'm currently curled up on the sofa wearing my dressing gown that is super soft and a bit too big for me (meaning I'm properly all wrapped up).

ain sorry to hear about your dad

purple any more symptoms?

So yesterday went to see the fertility specialist. It was good in a backwards kind of way. He's happy that the metformin seems to be having some sort of effect but has also agreed to start me on chlomid in January providing DPs swimmers are ok. Hes got to drop a sample of Monday and ive been booked in for an ultrasound and also will have to have day 5 bloods if AF shows ( really hoping it wont, im praying for a christmas BFP) Hes confident theres nothing wrong with my tubes because I had a hysterosopy last year and they were fine. All in all a good appointment and I came out with a weight lifted.

honey I have PCOS so I had day 21 bloods at the doctors which showed no ovulation. They then went on to prescribe metformin and I requested/pushed/badgered for a referral because I felt the gp just wanted to leave me to get on with it but i had so many questions and things I didnt understand. The referral only took about 3 weeks and I'm now very glad I did push

jelly I have told 2 close friends, one of them is pregnant and the other is also TTC. But other than that nobody. We have been married for almost 6 years so I think family have given up hope on us haha. So part of me wants to put them out of their misery and let them know we do actually want children - but then I don't want them all hoping and waiting for news and worrying if it takes a while. And with friends similar really, if it takes ages I don't want them all asking and wondering!

ain sorry to hear about your dad. Have you changed your diet for ttc? Could the cramps be digestion related?

jelly I hope your nan gets well soon too.

mistle yay for Clomid! Obvs I hope you don't need it but great to know you have a prescription there if you do

14 bcps left. I start ivf in 2 weeks!! I fear this could be the longest 2 weeks of my life to date. thank God Christmas is in there to speed it up!

Tink I semi changed my diet before ttc to reduce things like caffeine intake, trying to eat more fruit and veg, switched to wholewheat pasta and rice, etc but nothing major from what I was already doing. And that was back in August. In the past week I've reduced my carbs after the appointment I had last week about PCOS and being put on the metformin. I haven't cut anything out completely or started eating anything that I haven't before...

I guess it could be a side effect of the metformin, but I'm sure I've had these about 2 weeks now, where I've only been on the metformin a week.

I dared step on the scales this morning... I've lost 10lbs from my highest weight in August. 10lbs good - but not happy that it took so long. Only an average of 2.5lbs a month. Though I'm hoping that knowing what I know now about the carbs and PCOS and lower GI foods and that I'm taking metformin maybe I can lose a bit more weight a bit faster now...

I really am going to go to Tesco now...

ain it doesn't matter how long it takes, 10lb is an amazing achievement. don't set yourself unrealistic goals else you'll be destined to fail and will fall off the wagon. its taken me 1month since coming back off holiday to lose 3lb so you aren't alone. I think hormones play a big part as I would normally lose more but think the bcp is affecting my weight loss/metabolism. did you look at those links I sent you. I think you would benefit from trying to keep focussed on the positive side of things, like the 10lb not the time taken, the fact you have a diagnosis you can treat, not that you have pcos, the fact your family are getting the medical attention they need and care about protecting you, not that the worst could happen. mind over matter is a really powerful thing.

14 more pills left lil!!!!! Wowee!!

Haha lil your twotting

Ain I hope you're Dad is ok, it's very worrying, especially for a worrier!

Jelly I hope you're Nan is ok too.

No new symptoms here but I'm dying to POAS even though it's far too early! I'm driving myself mad with it. I'm going away for work on Monday and not back til Thursday night. I won't do it while he's at work either. But tomorrow is really far too soon!