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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

ttc after mc- the best shit place to be! #2

991 replies

chasingtherainbow · 21/11/2014 21:56

Roll up roll up... onto a new thread. Keep those lucky bfp' s coming and unmumsnetty hugs all round.

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StockingFullOfCoal · 15/12/2014 21:46

guybrush Thats exactly what I was thinking all night on Monday and till I saw the GP Tuesday. I was a bit Hmm when he said but I Googled and it is actually "a thing" Hmm But I am not entirely convinced it is.

I watched a very interesting docu a few years ago titled War in the Womb or something along those lines, basically explaining what you just said but in long science-y words with images and what not. Grin It was brilliant. It kept referring to "the maternal body" - the bit we basically have no control over and how it doesn't like to spend all that time growing something that isn't viable for whatever reason.

StockingFullOfCoal · 15/12/2014 21:48

I like science. Science comforts me. This was nothing I did or didn't do.

fififolle · 15/12/2014 22:19

Fantastic post, thank you Guy.

I hadn't heard of a Mirena causing thinning of the womb lining Stocking and couldn't find much with a quick a Google search. I had a Mirena in 2009, had it removed and conceived DS quickly. This year I had my Mirena out at the end of May, conceived mid Aug but it unfortunately ended in MMC.

It is reassuring to know that our awful loses have been due to a sequence of events far our of our control. Though as a control freak I do find it a wee bit frustrating Xmas Wink

enviousllama · 15/12/2014 22:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fififolle · 15/12/2014 22:23

Good point envious re Mirena but surly that effect goes once the coil is removed? Good luck with your TTC, I have fx for you x

Treaclepie19 · 15/12/2014 22:58

Thanks envious, I'm dreading my due date but otherwise looking forward to xmas. Just a bit fed up of work.
Hence being signed off but that's turned out just as bad now that work are unhappy with me for that.

giantmama · 16/12/2014 00:12

Hi. I've been hovering for a while, too busy to really keep up, sorry.

We did OPK last week so I'm on day ten after positive and DTD. Really can't make up my mind if I even want to test - could in a few days. Had what felt like period cramp yesterday- AF should arrive Sunday.

Dreading either way. Confused I think Christmas is going to be horrible without my babies, even worse if my hormones are at their AF peak. I'm singing in front of 2000 people on Sunday, due to test and due my period - I feel a meltdown coming...

Original poster
chasingtherainbow · 16/12/2014 06:36

stocking a big hug from me. I "came over" with anxiety and panic attacks which have continued almost a year. I'm on top of it better now but definitely still there, it's horrible.

As others have said, if lining is too thin it just won't implant. However. A healthy baby can survive under harsh circumstances- so if this baby is meant to be your sticky bean.. It will be. Flowers if not, then here's me firmly linking arms with you and strolling towards February ttc. I'm hoping for a March bfp.

treacle how you holding up my love? Things must be quite heightened emotionally for you right now.

I'm just about holding it together. The good news is that I seem to have started my period. This is really good news because although it's probably a WTF cycle as it's my first since the methotrexate dose (s) the fact that it's started immediately is good, given how irregular my cycles were prior to pregnancy. Can only pray that I have 2 super duper boring and regular cycles ready for easy bfp once the 3 month period is up!

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Treaclepie19 · 16/12/2014 06:48

I'm finding it quite tough chasing, which is probably why I've been so ill and signed off work. Just wish they understood.

Glad you're in your wtf cycle. Don't push yourself, you've had a really rough time. X

Original poster
chasingtherainbow · 16/12/2014 07:38

Oh love. Are you able to access any counselling. It sounds like you could do with help to work through this. I know I'm going to look into accessing some. X

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Treaclepie19 · 16/12/2014 08:57

I've been referred and had my initial appointment but still waiting for another x

Original poster
chasingtherainbow · 16/12/2014 09:05

I hope you get some regular sessions, I think it could really help. It's so shit isn't it :-(

I'm going to struggle when my Neice is born next year. I feel like I have to be grateful that we lost "early" on.. my poor SIL's sister lost her boy at full term just two weeks before my SIL had our healthy nephew. That must be so much worse in comparison. It's awful. I can only hope and pray that I'll be spending next year with a healthy pregnancy of my own. We can do this treacle. XXX

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Amyyy27 · 16/12/2014 09:32

Chasing Great to hear you are on the mend!

Hope everyone else is ok?

I didn't have a chance to read through yesterday as some little shit has stolen my phone. Its been one thing after another this year so I can't wait for 2015!! I'm not even annoyed so much that its money down the drain, its all the photos and notes I had on there. I also took pictures of my first BFPs and I'm gutted to have lost those :( I know that sounds so silly but it brings back happy feelings to look at the picture but nevermind! Hopefully we will have another BFP soon to be excited about.

Treaclepie19 · 16/12/2014 09:39

Youre right chasing.
My problem is I feel like i should be better by now. Its 7 months on.
Still I think I've been building up to this due date.

Sorry to hear about your phone Amyyy :(
2015 will be our year!

Thepurplegiraffe · 16/12/2014 10:13

Hi Haribo, thanks for asking. I have been pretty sick which is fun but taking it as a good sign. My official scan is 31st December but as I was so anxious about everything we paid for a scan on Saturday and much to my relief there was a heart beat. I know it is still early days and it can still go wrong (someone at work has just mc at 11 1/2 weeks which is awful) but feeling much happier. How are you feeling about everything? Am keeping everything crossed that it happens quickly for you now. For all of you actually.
Treacle it is completely understandable that you are feeling this way right now, this was always going to be a tough time for you and the time of year just adds to that. Hopefully when you get past that dreaded date things will start to improve and 2015 will be your year! Thinking of you Thanks

Treaclepie19 · 16/12/2014 11:15

Thanks purple, I'm glad you saw a heartbeat. I have my fingers crossed for you, it sounds good :)

Amyyy27 · 16/12/2014 11:30

Aww thanks Treacle I'm sure it will be hun!

Purple Lovely news, you take care!

HariboBrenshnio · 16/12/2014 11:52

purple so glad you got to see the heartbeat, it must feel really reassuring. I guess we'll worry until the day these babies are born, pregnancy after MC must feel so much hard in terms of worry. Sorry to hear about your colleague but i've got everything crossed for you.

I'm doing okay, i should ovulate by the end of this week so i'm feeling better that we can actually do something about being pregnant and out of the waiting and uncertainty (for now!). Little things get me and it hits in a wave. There was a post (you probably saw) about a lady pregnant with twins and it really hit me. Everyone was commenting saying they couldn't cope/imagine and all i could think was how lucky she was to have 2. I spent most of that evening crying which surprised me. I'm not sure we ever get over it? Over christmas we will be with DP's family at his dads pub and the barmaid there who i get on with well is a few weeks further on than i should have been, i imagine that will be hard (i've almost backed out a few times just at the thought of it!).

Treacle i'm sorry your having such a tough time. I hope you get your next appointment through soon. Screw work, you need to put yourself first and look after your health both physically and emotionally xx

StockingFullOfCoal · 16/12/2014 13:21

treacle Bollocks to work, bollocks to them and the horse they rode in on. GPs will not sign you off for stress unless they feel there is a very real need for it. I love how people think they know more than a GP. Nope you don't, shut up.

We were mostly concerned about DH after the baby is born - he lost his 4 week old son to SIDS - and about me during pregnancy with my MH issues but never once thought we'd be dealing with a MC. Its added an extra layer to some already not so light worries. I was watching him with my DDs last night and it makes my heart break, he deserves to be a father again so much.

StockingFullOfCoal · 16/12/2014 13:21

*breaks not makes

Treaclepie19 · 16/12/2014 13:43

Haha thanks ladies xxx
Im hoping my headaches start going off though. If they don't I'll have to go back :/

northdownmummy · 16/12/2014 14:55

Early testing at Christmas - what would you do?

AF is due on boxing day, I've been abstaining from all booze for about 3 months now. I and am totally torn on whether to test early. Is be able to have a few glasses of bubbles on Christmas day of its a BFN. But based ony reaction to AF the last few cycles, it might just get me too upset and emotional.

Is anyone else on th 2ww and wondering about the same thing ?

StockingFullOfCoal · 16/12/2014 15:12

north I've just started the 2WW and my first day of testing is Christmas Day... But whether I do or not I just don't know, I keep thinking that if I'd waited till my period was late I wouldn't have known I was pregnant, I would have assumed my 1 day late period was just unusually heavy this month, rather than being a 4 week MC. So this time do I test early or do I leave it? Sigh.

Original poster
chasingtherainbow · 16/12/2014 15:41

purple ...that's excellent news xx

stocking ... I really don't know about testing! I knew I wouldn't be able resist even if I planned too. I am so so sorry to hear of your DH loss, and your subsequent mc. :-(

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Gr33dyeggs · 17/12/2014 07:28

treacle if you're not well enough for work - you shouldn't be there. It's sad that people don't understand the feelings following mc and expect you to move on and don't realise there will always be triggers setting you back.

stocking sorry to hear of your and your DH worries - MC certainly is an unneeded addition. As for testing, I've never tested early, always wait til AF late.

north People will undoubtedly disagree with me but I am having the occasional small glass of wine despite TTC. I enjoy it, and will continue to do so until I have a BFP.

purple lovely to hear things are going well with lots of symptoms.

amyyy sorry your phone and pictures have gone. Too late now but I have dropbox which somehow automatically uploads my pics to it when I'm home.

haribo are the twins from june 15? I've not been on for a while. I hope the barmaid stays behind the bar then it hopefully won't be as tough! I know 3 people in RL due in June now :-(

A course I was supposed to be on today has been cancelled so usual crappy day ahead.

Would have been looking forward to my day off tomorrow but I have a meeting about my complaint at the hospital. And its on the ward I complained about. Intimidating or what!

Hugs and thanks for reading if you got this far.