ttc after mc- the best shit place to be! #2

[chasingtherainbow]

Roll up roll up... onto a new thread. Keep those lucky bfp' s coming and unmumsnetty hugs all round.

Cross posted Stocking then my next post disappeared. It will happen, you will have a beautiful baby with your DH.

Thanks fifi

My SIL looked at me like I was crazy I am a bit But its just the ruminating element of my bipolar disorder rearing its bloody ugly head again as it tends to do in times of stress. I'm very aware of when I am doing it but it doesn't seem to do any good

DH & I discussed it this evening and he doesn't know how he feels at the moment either. SIGH.

eggs i'm sorry AF got you. I cried all day the day AF got me after my WTF cycle, it's so hard to handle. I'm on CD5 now though and i'm feeling more positive and in control, i hope your okay xx

Treacle thinking of you. I really really want this to be your month.

Sorry to see new faces here and i hope your holding up okay.

I feel like when my AF came it also brought with it some really raw emotions from the miscarriage. I would have loved to have known the sex so i could say 'he' or 'she' instead of 'it'. I've been questioning why i got as far as 9 weeks before it all stopped, why not earlier if it wasn't a viable pregnancy? I've had some fab support but other than DP it's become old news and i'm still struggling. MC is so shit. I started ttc straight away because i had too and i'll continue to until i'm pregnant again. I was telling DP 'the plan' and he just said, 'Tell me when you need me, i'm there'. At least he's onboard!

Hiya can I join please?
Had MMC ending with an ERPC at what would have been 11+ 2 on 11/11...I am 34 & it was my first pregnancy :-(
Anyway after - HPT & HCG

Thanks Haribo, i really really hope so.

Sorry you've had to join us hadepop, the ladies here are brilliant for support x

Thanks Treaclepie

So having spent at least an hour of google time this morning it seems I should be trying to persuade OH to dtd again tonight, any ideas without him feeling like hes performing to a timetable lol? xx

Hello all, just a quick update whilst I grab a quick lunch and I will catch up properly at weekend. Mega busy at work sorting out hundreds of Christmas contact arrangements, just what I need!!
I had the blood appointment yesterday at the bigger hospital and it was the nurse who I saw when I had first MC and a male trainee doctor. Both were lovely and I was brave enough at the end to ask if I could change consultant. She looked me straight in the eye and said "absolutely and you need give no explanation", so I have been changed to another consultant with immediate effect. I almost skipped to the car which is saying something given the wind just now!!
Plan is to just keep ttc and these tests will take around 6 weeks. If I get a positive I have to call nice nurse and she will do a scan at 6 weeks. AF due Friday and not really been trying this month so we can start afresh December. Christmas spirit and all that!!

I am very grumpy so know af is imminent but a small part of me still hopes for nothing on Friday. I have a spooky family history where every baby on my side has been born in August, ie, grandparents, mum, dad, me and 2 siblings and all my sisters 3 children. I was the same last year at this time!
Thinking of you all and many thanks for reading.

Hello ladies,

Hope you are all well today? Thinking of you all.

Af seems to be stopping thankfully, although I don't know how I feel about ttc this month. I had eventually decided on trying ASAP but I think this month we will just 'wait and see', if it happens I will be over the moon but I don't want to add pressure onto us both. Then again, the way my mind is working lately I will have probably changed my mind again by tomorrow!

Not sure if I have missed anything but have we had any more BFPs this month? And to the previous BFP'ers hope you are both well!

That's great news allthe and well done you for asking!

Great you've been able to change consultants allthe. From the nurses reaction it sounds like a common request!

I called the Dr's to rearrange swab because they won't do it when I'm on, and asked if hcg test was back. It is but the dr needs to call me about it. Wtf? If its neg why wouldn't they be able to tell me? So now worried its not neg so why am I bleeding? Any thoughts? And I've got another cyst. And a achy hip. My body is broken.

Allthe that is great news. Well done for speaking up. I wonder if that is the standard reply or if that consultant has a reputation.

Gr33dy sorry you are having an additional worry and uncertainty to deal with. This is hard enough without that.

Amyy I hope this cycle goes well for you. It's so hard I know when you are sort of not-not trying, your brain can't help hoping though.

Hade sorry you are joining us but very best of luck on the 2ww.

I received a copy of the letter sent to my GP today. It didn't say anything new but said I had tested positive for strep b. It doesn't sound like they thought that was the cause though.

The colleague who upset me at the weekend made a formal grievance against me and emailed my boss and the chairman of the board, including telling them about my mc. So today at work was fun. Thankfully I had written out exactly what happened and was able to give my side. My boss was really nice and couldn't believe the colleague was doing this either. Talk about kicking someone when they are down.

MrsJ what the FUCK is your colleague's problem?!

MsJ what a complete pyscho, she is the one that is going to come out of this looking ridiculous. Hard I know but try not to let it get to you.

Yeah it was a pretty horrible shock. But as you say she is the one who looks bad. It just meant I had to explain the whole thing to my boss which I had tried to avoid doing. She said she wished I had told her about the mc which was fair enough. Just feel wrung out now.

Still having some yukky end-of-period stuff appearing when I wipe so I'm not quite ready to dtd yet. It will be hard enough to get into the mood I think, never mind about worrying about all that. Who knows if or when I will ovulate so I will just have to take my chances.

Plus MsJ I think you were pretty blameless for snapping at her in the first place. Her laziness left your poor mum waiting around for an hour and she didn't even apologise.

envious i couldn't find any stats on it either. I was sure i ovulated and DTD when i thought i was but didn't get lucky. Having caught first time with the baby we lost i was surprised. Maybe my body geared up to ovulate but didn't, i can't be sure i wasn't using OPK's. The time when i thought i ovulated was 3 weeks after i first started bleeding and i must have been right as my period arrived 2 weeks later. You could have ovulated as early as 2 weeks after though if your body treats the MC as a normal cycle. It's so hard to tell, if your strong enough not to test then i'd leave it until 6 weeks after MC if your period hasn't arrived. If your like me, i started testing 4 weeks after and period arrived at 5 weeks. Unfortunately it's just so unpredictable which did feel overwhelming at times.

I also got 'symptoms' - vivid dreams, heartburn, bloating, tiredness..
I really hope you've caught, fingers crossed.

Juipter what a bitch! I think karma will have a way of biting her in the ass. She looks like a fool targeting a woman who's been through such an awful time. I hope your okay xx

envious I had what felt like severe ovulation pains for a week but despite dtd during then and various symptoms (bloating, tingly nipples, nausea (still have)) b4 my period arrived 4 weeks exactly from the day of actual miscarriage. Like haribo I appreciate I've been lucky in the past, but have caught 1st cycle 3 times of trying so have to believe I didn't ovulate in the wtf cycle.

msj your colleague is stupid to complain - she's been in the wrong at every point!

hade fx in your 2ww

Oh MsJ what a nasty bitter woman she must be, to know what you are already going through then put you through even more shit! I agree with everyone else though she will come out of this looking like the nasty little cow she sounds like! I know that's not the point and you must be so fed up so sending hugs and positive thoughts x

envious I ha exactly the same timescales as haribo but didn't fall either. I couldn't fin any actual stats just opinions. Fx for you x

I'm definitely almost at the end of af I am just wiping very light brown (sorry!) the only thing is I've actually had pain today where my ovaries are, it's the first time in af I hve had pain and thought it's strange when it's almost finished.. Or is it? I don't know what's normal and what's not!

More moaning from me I'm afraid. I'm fed up!!! Of work and of ttc.
Gah :(

Sorry to hear about that stupid woman msj, as people say, she looks bad not you.
6dpo for me. Come on test day.

Treaclpie I know what you mean, my line manager has been calling me asking what I want to do when I go back in six days. I want to tell him to fuck off and not bother me until I have a healthy baby in my arms I just couldn't care less about work anymore.

Guys please help. I had my erpc on the first. I didn't have any bleeding before then. The paperwork the nurse gave me said I shouldn't bleed for more than six days but this is day nine and theres red blood when I wipe. It has been tapering off to brown but now it's red again. What should I do? There's no pain or smell.

Also can I ovulate if I'm still bleeding or will it have to stop first?

Sorry if tmi

Snoopy, my consultant said bleeding would last between 5 and 10 days. She said to go back immediately if it became heavier or painful or if it was still going after 10-14 days.

Have you done a pregnancy test? I don't know if you'll ovulate while still bleeding to be honest- depends on your hormone levels I guess. Logic suggests maybe not because your uterine lining won't have got to cycle day 1 and started rebuilding. But I'm no expert.

My bleeding was about 5-6 days and then I had a bit if spotting after about 10 days. I'd had a really stressful and active day so maybe it could have been that.

Are you planning to ttc straight away snoopy?