ttc after mc- the best shit place to be! #2

[chasingtherainbow]

Roll up roll up... onto a new thread. Keep those lucky bfp' s coming and unmumsnetty hugs all round.

Hmmm it's confusing. I had my scan on 27th which showed no heartbeat and they think the baby was about eight weeks but I think I should have been about ten.
I never spoke to a doctor after the erpc on Monday. All the nurses were going home so I just said well I'm going to get dressed now then and they gave me some painkillers and I walked out. No one mentioned any sort of follow up appointment. I wasn't in a state to ask many questions and they wouldn't let my husband in to be with me.
I'm going to go to my GP I think, she's a nice lady and hopefully I won't get the blank dismissal I got at the hospital.
Hope everyone is feeling a bit better today. I'm still bleeding very lightly but I'm decorating the bathroom, hoping movement will get things going a bit quicker down there

snoopy your hospital experience sounds awful. What's up with people?
MrsD they were identical, so not hereditary. My brother has fraternal twins - it comes from the mother's line. Safe to say that's my one and only chance of conceiving twins now gone. My Ob Con reckons it's a good thing I'll never conceive twins again since I would have a much lower risk pregnancy 'next time'. Yeah, fine, except I actually really wanted my twins. She's brilliant, but that comment still cuts me to the bone. I am not, in fact, jumping for joy that I'll never have twins now.
DH is in less pain but face still swollen, I still feel like shit. Cannot imagine jumping his bones right now!

Snoopy as far as I know, they don't do a follow up after erpc as a rule because most likely the procedure got rid of everything. Things to look for would be bleeding that gets heavier or pain or signs of infection. Otherwise just assume everything went fine. Have you fine a pregnancy test? My negative has coincided with bleeding stopping so I assume I might ovulate in a couple of weeks?

I'm really trying to look at any evidence for and against ttc immediately and there is nothing! One study which shows better results in the first 6 months. But it totally unscientific because it doesn't factor in age or fertility problems. Speculation on lots of forums. Lots of people saying they were advised to wait because it takes a few months for the uterine lining to thicken. Anyone know if there is any truth in this? I thought it thickened every month.
I know I'm overthinking it. Just want do what's best I guess.

Hi to all the new joiners, so sad you find yourselves here.

I'm all dressed up and about to go on my works Christmas night out. Not drinking cause I'm trying to give us the best chance this month. ...... But dreading someone jumping to assumptions

Sorry we all find ourselves on here ladies. I'm TTC after two losses this year (may and sept) Been a hellish year!

We just moved a few months ago to Esher, Surrey (from wimbledon) and I wondered if anyone here is from the surrounding area or nearby? (e.g. surbiton/kingston/new malden?) Don't know too many folks yet and would be great to connect with someone in a similar position who just "gets it".

Moonlight Sorry I'm nowhere near I'm up in the north east!

Envious I had the same as you as tested negative the next day hun :) the horrible wait sounds like its over for you!

Can I be really gross and ask you all about your first af after mc? Its now been 5 weeks since my mc (cannot believe its been that long..) and at the beginning of this week I started spotting very very pale brown, later in the day I had a tiny bit of cramping and wiped red and thought this must be it however since then I have only had pale brown/pale pink on wiping. Although must admit on the first day I passed a couple of small clots and the same on Wednesday, there was not a lot there but very dark brown. I used to get very severe cramping and bleeding and this just does not feel like a period at all. I'm worried its going to be just more of the mc... but you would think after 5 weeks it should be af by now? Just wondering if anyone can put me out of my misery and tell me if they think its my af or not... and how long (roughly) to expect this to go on? Thank you!

Ignore that! Just been to loo and bright red.. so that answers that lol. But would like to know how long others' af lasted for?

Oh! and am I allowed to use tampons or just pads?

Ah that's what I thought, thanks envious!

Can you not go back to tampax for the first period after mc? That's a bummer.

Nurse told me yesterday to expect period 2-3 weeks after bleeding stops, but from what I've read on here that seems to be completely incorrect. Maybe it depends on how early you mc? If you expect it that soon after bleed stops also, how on earth do you even have time to ovulate again?

I'm wondering the same. So my negative was yesterday and I stopped bleeding then too. So would it make sense that my body would think cd1 is round about now-ish? My periods aren't that regular as it is (usually between 28-38 day cycles) but I always know exactly when my period is due because I know when I ovulate (cramps, ewcm etc). Wonder if I'll even have normal ov signs this month. Argh! I hate all this uncertainty and it's only just started.

Can we do a poll? Those of you who are past the wtf cycle, how long after mc was first period?

I'm still torturing myself with thoughts that I might have done something to cause mc. I had some drinks the weekend before I got bfp and I feel terrible about it. Plus we conceived first cycle- maybe my body wasn't ready after a couple of years on the pill. I continued cycling every day- could it be that?

I know it probably wasn't anything I did but it's hard not to speculate.

allchat my consultant said to expect period about 4 or 5 weeks after erpc.

AllChat I wasn't told anything at all so done some research which suggested your first period "should" arrive around 4-7 weeks after the first day of red bleeding in mc. I also ready 2 weeks after could still be part of the mc coming away. But I don't know. I wish they could give everyone the same answer but then I suppose everyone's body is different!

Such a confusing time for us! :(

Guy Sorry you're having crappy thoughts :( I had the same thoughts and brought it up with my therapist. She told me it was soooo unlikely to be anything I had done and I needed to stop beating myself up about it. No tests were done on our baby with it being our first so there was no way to know anyway. With regards to the pill I fell pregnant while on the pill (Never been great at taking tablets every day!) and I was terrified it would case damage. I was told that women who have fallen pregnant whilst on the pill can have a little bleeding (which is what they blamed the first time I bled and had a scan) but that it would "definitely not cause a mc, but we don't know why the bleeding happens"... so I wasn't sure what to make of that to be honest.

Guy, I know what you mean about thinking was there something you shouldn't have done but please don't feel guilty.
If you look at my previous posts you'll see what I do for a living and I didn't tell them I was pregnant for a few weeks, in that time I had physical fights, spent a lot of time in hospitals, came in to contact with addicts and people with very infection possible. I worked night shifts and I stupidly trusted that the hospital would know the importance of testing my thyroid levels and not leave it six weeks with no results.

Logically I know that the likelihood of any of this causing the miscarriage is slim but next time, and please God let there be a next time soon, I will tell my employers straight away and I will go to my GP for blood tests.

guy please don't think it was anything you did that caused the mc. With my first pregnancy I thought AF had arrived, went out and got hideously drunk, only to get my BFP 2 days later - that pregnancy was completely trouble-free and DD is now a very bright 4.5 year old!

As for first AF, I got mine 3 weeks after I'd stopped bleeding from the erpc.

First AF for most recent wtf cycle was 24 days after erpc. I bled lightly for about a week after erpc. Weird discharge rather than blood really. It was about the same after my first natural mc. My cycles Are usually pretty clockwork around 27 or 28 days. Both times I still felt my usual ov pain but had a shorter luteal phase. Not sure if I really ovulated. First cycle can be annovulatory and I never checked.

I'm 27 days from '1st red blood' so AF due anytime soon. I've had pregnancy symptoms of tingly nipples, bloating and some nausea but now have (tmi) pink/brown sticky cm. Had a blood pregnancy test today, results Monday, but likely AF will be here tomorrow. Confusing signals.

My first af was 24 days after first red blood so it sounds like it could come any time.
I think most of us have questioned why it happened and if we could have done anything differently. The day my mc started I had had a particularly difficult and physical couple of weeks with dd, especially the day it happened and I couldn't help wondering if that had an effect but logically I know it didn't. We were all just very unlucky.

Mine was a 25 day wtf cycle.
Hope all are ok. Off to read back.

Guy i've just got my 1st period after mc (and it's super heavy!) and it was exactly 5 weeks since 1st bleed of the mc.

I'v also tortured myself with wondering if it was anything i did. We traveled to London the heartbeat stopped and i keep thinking, 'if i'd have just stayed home and rested'.. but how was i to know? With my DS i didn't know i was pregnant and went on a big sunday session of drinking for DP's birthday at 4 weeks ish and he's a perfectly healthy little boy. I guess it's just bad luck.

Struggling with the emotion of the first af as i really wanted to conceive in the wtf cycle and i'm worried i wont conceive very quickly. Only positive is that i can track ovulation, follow the sperm meets egg theory and have some control. When we did this last time i got a BFP the first month, only issue is no drinking over Christmas 'just incase' but don't want the family thinking it's because i'm pregnant again!

Sorry to see more people joining, it really is the absolute pits.

Just realised I've been updating wrong thread

Today is 3 weeks since passing sac in mc (at 7 weeks), did test this morning, still positive grrrr so phoned gynae ward, spoke to nurse, then to doc, then went up there for bloods (2 hr wait not ideal), should get results tomorrow but they've booked scan for Monday anyway. Then had to dash back to work, get festive face on for team Xmas quiz and dinner (I head up team on 20 so lots of people to convince). Utterly wiped out. Why isn't this over yet????

Awww mrsconfusion I hope you get your results soon.

I had a bad morning, it was DHs first day back at work after compassionate leave. We work on the same team so everyone knows what's going on.

Haven't been doing too well by myself (still In my dressing gown) but I just did a test and it's nearly negative! I mean, if things were the other way round I'd convince myself it's an early positive but it's going the right way! Now I just have to wait for this brown spotting nonsense to stop, hope these pimples on my neck clear up and seduce DH!

Right I'm going to get dressed