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The home of sporn lovers and cunthawks; make sure the ewcm is coming from the right hole and don your capes (but don't put parsley up your chuff!) ... for JUST SHAGGING Part 33

999 replies

mountaingirl01 · 16/11/2014 23:21

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

  1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
  2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
  3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
  4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo


ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others. Also know as 'the witch', 'bitch witch' and 'that one with the red shiny convertible'

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in! PONF = Pee on Nigel Farage. Self explanatory, who wouldn't? 

ROC - Receptacle of Choice - what one chooses to use for the task of POAS. Option decorations include photographs of political leaders.

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet or jizz in the eye. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession. Warning - this may happen to you if you start trying to POAS at 5dpo. PUT. THE. PISSY. STICK. DOWN. IT'S TOO EARLY!

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture. AKA Schroedinging!
TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

Keeping your gingers = fingers crossed, yet another autocorrect development! Shortened to 'gx'

The link to Part 31 is here

The current Grads Fred is here

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is here. We are the dark side of MN. Welcome.

Happy shagging, shaggers!
OP posts:
Thread gallery
22
jellypi3 · 19/11/2014 10:56

If only it was home time! I'm so bloody bored!

I don't go too far up but I only have little fingers hahaha!

lildottie · 19/11/2014 11:56

everyone is different indigo. have a ferret after a bowel movement and it'll be more obvious. otherwise all I can suggest is epo and grapefruit on top of the water. how much are u drinking?

lildottie · 19/11/2014 11:56

everyone is different indigo. have a ferret after a bowel movement and it'll be more obvious. otherwise all I can suggest is epo and grapefruit on top of the water. how much are u drinking?

lildottie · 19/11/2014 11:56

everyone is different indigo. have a ferret after a bowel movement and it'll be more obvious. otherwise all I can suggest is epo and grapefruit on top of the water. how much are u drinking?

Leela5 · 19/11/2014 11:57

lil very insistent there! Wink

jellypi3 · 19/11/2014 12:15

Blimey I know gaggia is famous for her double posts but triple lil! Grin

lildottie · 19/11/2014 12:18

costa WiFi failed me!

jellypi3 · 19/11/2014 12:28

the fucket!!!

jellypi3 · 19/11/2014 12:29

Oops fucker....not even autocorrect that time just my bad spelling

Khbutterfly11 · 19/11/2014 12:37

that's just made me smile! i guess we should have a ferret after a bowel movement then?!?

Witch is playing with me! she's done knock and run and i can only guess that she's going to turn back up later with a vengeance, luggage and all!!

feeling all emotional as well today, it's been a long time since i have felt like crying for no reason (anti-depressants have shielded me for 12 months!!)

Khbutterfly11 · 19/11/2014 12:43

i think i prefer fucket jelly lol

DulcetMoans · 19/11/2014 13:49

Came and sat outside for lunch. Can not be arsed to go back! Meeting at 2 as well. Maybe I can sit at the back and not pay attention!

Khbutterfly11 · 19/11/2014 13:56

can so relate dulcet couldn't concentrate this morning and just wanted to cry so popped out for a coffee with a friend, did almost make me feel better apart from a) she asked if i was hormonal because i was pg or whether i was due on - she doesn't know we're ttc and she's the one person i really can't tell as she's DSD's mum and doesn't really want us to have a baby (DSD's do though lol!)

and b) i had to come back to work! oh and some old duffer cut me up at a roundabout - felt like screaming "NOT TODAY YOU FUCKER!!!" but just gave him the look instead!! so now i'm back to sitting at my desk procrastinating about work - again!

jellypi3 · 19/11/2014 14:44

Yay for procrastination!!

I just sorted out a major issue in work that is well above my pay grade to deal with, and didn't even get a thanks! Bah!

Also, trying to work out DSD and DSD's mum??

Khbutterfly11 · 19/11/2014 14:47

Step Daughters :-D I have 2, aged 13 and 15 me and their mum get on really well.

Hate when that happens! it's such a simple word that would keep us so much happier!!!

jellypi3 · 19/11/2014 14:52

Alhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh that makes sense lol! I was going mad trying to work it out! Doh!

Khbutterfly11 · 19/11/2014 14:54

lol!!! at the risk of sounding like chris Tarrent - it's only easy if you know it! :-D x

TinkerBlue · 19/11/2014 17:03

kh I really hope she stays away! How are you now?

I'm feeling a little sheepish Blush I had a gentle moan at the nurse this morning that I haven't received my scan referral letter yet, and lo and behold, what was on the mat when I got home just now - my scan referral letter! Blush
Booked in for Dec 10th for tummy one and fanjo one! DH is doing his SA on 3rd so hopefully we should know what we're dealing with by Christmas! Smile
So - now I just need a volunteer to go in my place - any takers? (preferably someone young with no issues) Then I can happily keep my head in the sand for a bit longer without actually facing up to anything!! Anyone..... no? Hmm

jellypi3 · 19/11/2014 17:09

Good news Tink :)

lildottie · 19/11/2014 17:11

tink knowledge is power. from there you can make decisions and feel like you are achieving something. Thanks

TinkerBlue · 19/11/2014 17:15

Thanks!

lil I like that - may adopt it as my new mantra in the same vein as "Today I am...." of the newly upduffed!!

In sporn news I have an ingrowing hair on my calf that is giving me gip - am boiling the kettle to sterilise needle and tweezers as we speak!
Also, dh insists he cant come near me as he has a spotty bell-end!! Apparently its not thrush but looks like it, but he wont let me see spoilsport

TinkerBlue · 19/11/2014 17:20

Ok, no need for needle - most disappointing it just popped out with minimum fuss.

Where Is kato?

Khbutterfly11 · 19/11/2014 17:33

good news about the appt tink bad news about the calfickle! disappointing when they go too easily!!!

she's still staying away so far, no nothing since 1st thing :-/ am desperately clinging on to probably false hope x

jellypi3 · 19/11/2014 17:43

Kh my phone is shit at going back and looking at messages, how many DPO are you?

Shit day at work today. Uff! Also the person who was selling this kitten I wanted has now decided she doesn't want to sell it...

Knob end.

Khbutterfly11 · 19/11/2014 17:50

11dpo today. am on CD28 and cycle was only 25days last month. didn't pay any attention the month before because of withdrawal bleed from bcp etc it all got very confusing. maybe my body still hasn't got to grips with what it's supposed to do sans bcp x

that's a bit of a shit thing to pull jelly would be gutted if I'd got my heart set on it! :-( x