Break the bed, marvel at the ghost sperm, ignore the fuss about avatar pandas and whatever you do - don't eat the jizz! It's Just Shagging Part 28

[Leela5]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

The link to Part 27 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2157458-Get-your-cape-on-get-your-cape-on-Dont-come-knockin-if-the-tents-a-rockin-but-pee-on-a-snake-instead-Its-just-shagging-part-27" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2160935-Just-Shagging-Thread-11-for-Graduated-Viroids?" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging, shaggers!

Yay Jelly. Why the heck not :)

Feels like I need a 2nd job Kato. I am bemoaning the lack of funds in my account for frers until payday, which is a whole week away. I have one more digi but I'd hate to waste it, like the last one. And I'm overdrawn :(

Going to beg or borrow the funds on Thurs if I still feel like this with no sign of AF.

Sorry, Mountain

thanks you lot xxx

Just cycled 40 miles in the rain and eaten my own body weight in pasta and cheese to cheer myself up :)

Good luck Jelly! Going for a promotion just now, so today's revelation will make that interesting!

Mountain - 40 MILES?!? Actually 40 miles?!? In the rain?! Pasta and cheese or not, I'm impressed! (40 miles?!)

Good grief, that's a bit of a ride. You are action woman Mountain. I hope the endorphins and the cheese made you feel better.

Can anyone recommend a cheap but reliable pregnancy test? The chemist near work sells FRERs, Clearblue (no!) and Digis only, and I really can't afford any of them this week. I am either due today or a day late so a normal test might well show something if there's something to show. Don't want to wait for internet cheapies to arrive in the post.

Or should I just wait? If I am pg, I might well still be pg on Saturday when DH has promised to buy me one romance is dead. I'm a bit scared as I mc the two days after I found out last time, though I was 2 weeks late by then.

Sorry for long rambling post. I have to walk past the chemist in a minute and I'm trying to avoid doing what I think I'm going to do.

The IC's I got on amazon arrived after two days so maybe buy a batch of those?

Thanks for the good luck wishes everyone. I'm excited but also nervous.

I've not had any signs of AF since stopping the progesterone tabs on Monday :( I was really hopefully because I had cramping and bloating and the crazy amounts of watery CM but now it's all stopped.

So pretty fed up today!

Sorry for lack of AF Jelly. If the progesterone (just autocorrected to "project wrong") triggered ovulation or near enough, it might be a couple of weeks before AF. But I might have mixed up my hormones. La and others know better than me which does what. You know from the cramping/cm that something happened, it could still be a trigger. Fx for you. :)

Superdrug early test at 4 mins. Ulp! Still not much darker...

There definitely a line Before.

Before - that is definitely definitely a line! And darker than the last one which I couldn't see at all on my screen. Congratulations! BFP BFP BFP!

before I see it, not quite as dark as bother but a lines a line!!

No that's a mother fooking BFP bother!!!! OMG! Doing the congratulations dance here!! :D

Sorry before!!

My drawn on one's pretty conclusive too though Jelly! Think that's all I'm gonna get this month too - witch is looming I reckon.

Def a line Before. What cd are you on?

Before, that right there is a LINE. You are up the duff!

Hurray before - no doubting that line! Now get your stats in before you upset jelly

Bothersome your posts yesterday did make me chuckle.

Big thanks, I think to la - have tried the evening primrose oil & no doubting the presence of pant snot this month don't come a knockin' at my house tonight...

calli before fucking huge congrats that's brilliant!

WWWWWAAAAAHHHHH Before!!! There's a liiiiiine!!!!! Congratulations!

Congratulations before, that's lovely news!

Viroids sadly this morning at my early scan my baby wasn't where it should be so I'll not be having a baby this time. I have suspected ectopic pregnancy so I'm on hospital waiting for results. May need surgery.

Bit of a shock and trying to come to terms with it all.

I'll come back when all this is over. Good luck to all of you xxx

La - my heart is with you. Hope all goes ok xxx

Oh La, I'm so sorry. How awful for you. I hope you and Mr La are handling this together. I hope to have you back with us soon but you must look after yourself first and foremost. Love to you, Mr La and famous moggy.

Oh La . So sorry, there are no words. Please look after yourself, our thoughts are with you. x

So sorry la our thoughts and prayers are with you