Break the bed, marvel at the ghost sperm, ignore the fuss about avatar pandas and whatever you do - don't eat the jizz! It's Just Shagging Part 28

[Leela5]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

TWPU - Two Week Piss Up!

The link to Part 27 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2157458-Get-your-cape-on-get-your-cape-on-Dont-come-knockin-if-the-tents-a-rockin-but-pee-on-a-snake-instead-Its-just-shagging-part-27" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2160935-Just-Shagging-Thread-11-for-Graduated-Viroids?" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging, shaggers!

Also if you take eve primrose oil it makes ewcm more obvious, plus water.

Lovejoy was staple viewing in my house. My mum lived Ian mcshane

My ROC is the lid off a hairspray can :)

Morning all! Thanks for all the icing advice...I caved and bought OPK yesterday but only a very faint line, so I've either missed it or misinterpreted signs. Either way, am getting my cape on as of tonight...having my 'ovulation waxing' at lunchtime!

Lovejoy - am joining Wilma and Wiggly in feeling old - was my favourite TV prog and teenage crush in the lat 80's.

Went to yoga last night and some bloody heavily pregnant bint turned up, set up next to me a downward dogged her perfect bump at me for an hour...PREGNANCY YOGA IS ON A SUNDAY...which is why I do yoga on a Thursday...not sure my shakra's are well aligned TBH.

Happy Friday Hags!

x

Right, well I won't be POAS this weekend Viroids :(

I went to the docs this morning for an unrelated issue and I mentioned to the doctor about having no periods, so he suggested putting me on an extremely high dose of progesterone for 10 days, which might kickstart my periods afterwards.

However in order to so I needed to POAS, which I did and it was BFN (as expected). But fx these new tablets give my system the kick it needs.

He also gave me a bit of a reality check. I mentioned about OPK's and he said they are a huge waste of money and not endorsed by the royal society of something or other. And I kind of realised that I came into this whole experience wanting to just get on with it, not worry or stress, and I have been really OTT with checking CM, using the OPK and other things. When really, it should all be about just shagging!!

So he said "have unprotected (gee thanks) intercourse 3 times a week to surround the egg in lovely sperm" lol. So going forward that's my thinking (gonna give away the OPK's this afternoon).

Sorry for the lecture :) Hope you're all having a smashing Friday!

PS: I don't have a ROC...I just tend to POMF while POAS - perhaps that needs to change...

Haha, pineapple cup FTW! I've lost the lid though... so really is just a big yellow cup now haha

Was that really your first Fred La?? I thought you were here before me!

No ROC here, just a well-aimed stream but then I only POregulationS, no contraband and not that often.

Welcome Tink and happy racing mountain.

My mother has just emailed to tell me that my high school friend with four kids already is freshly upduffed and feeling sick - she's about 8w. She thought she'd tell me "Because I'm TTC" and "she thought I'd be interested". Presumably to rub it in some more? I'd be delighted to congratulate my buddy as and when she chooses to announce it, but really? What was she hoping to achieve by telling me now? Blubbering hormonal wreck, exit stage left At least I shan't be icing for my birthday so I can indulge in some wine. That'll help.

Don't worry La I don't use my naice glasses

Hope that gets things going for you Jelly

I didn't use an ROC for my first few tests. I did for the digi because I didn't want to risk peeing on the wrong part of such an expensive stick and then I needed it for the IC tests I was taking afterwards. My name is Pis and I'm a POAS addict... It's been a whole week since my last episode

La, when I get upduffed again I am totally going to poas every damn day until they are all gone. Why not?

Chat I feel your pain.

jelly sounds like you've got a fresh perspective! Yay for shagging!

The other day I said to my friends that I was looking forward to all the shagging, and they were all kinda mock horrified... Weird. I had to say "well, I've heard sex is kinda crucial when TTC, you know..." Is it not the done thing to tell your closest friends that TTC will involve you and your dh shagging and being pleased about it? Surely everyone enjoys a good shag? Very odd response I felt. These are my closest friends after all, not acquaintances. Maybe its because we have to work at it. My end makes it really rather painful so we take a lot of care and attention. Maybe they take being able to shag easily for granted?

Endo, not end.

I have told one of my friends we are TTC, her response was "Stop texting me and go jump your man!" so she saw the humour in it. But there are some people I wouldn't talk to about it, friends I have known for 20 years+ because I think they would get embarrased about it.

People are weird eh!

Just an update 2-3 days late no af and 2 negative tests this morning. I wish af would just hurry up and come so I can start to try again. Hope everyone's well.

Fx melody, jelly your convo with the dr reminded me of previous advice I've had! I seem to recall that's why my opks were in the airing cupboard! So because I am in no way getting ttc obsessed I did a bit of googling and it seems the icepops will only tell u if lh level is high, not if you actually ice. In pcos often the egg just releases into a little cyst, so on could rise with no icing! Doh, so I think for me the key will be if I see an increase in temp after the event??? I'm effing awful at remembering to temp too, anyone got any tips on how to remember??

Fwiw I have one friend in rl that I have sex talk with, I don't bother anyone else with it cos I know I'd be too sensitive to their reactions!

Happy Friday viroids! Weekend of cape action for me

Lh, not on.

Oh I love this Fred! Warning, long post ahead...

Bother I also POMF. Is there an advantage to PIAROC other than not having pissy fingers? I am also very glad someone shares my Lovejoy love. It is best enjoyed on a duvet day sandwiched between Midsommer Murders and repeats of the Antiques Roadshow on yesterday (my teenage self would be horrified if she could read this).

I have had exactly the same thing happen to me at yoga too. I actually changed the class I went to because it was after pregnancy yoga and I found myself eyeing the bumps too jealously at changeover. Might have to do some more meditation in my fantasy world where I have time to sit/lie quietly to become more yogic about this.

I really hope the progesterone boost does the trick Jelly. Get your sexy undies on and get ready for some JSing. It's so interesting what you wrote about OPKs. I've only ever used them once and didn't get a reading so gave up.

Gah chat what was the point in telling you that??? I feel your exasperation. Hugs.

So here's today's WTF cycle update. Woke up this morning feeling like AF was about to start, on my count I reckon 5 days early. Tiny bit of blood on wiping and so far today I've just had a little brown bleed as opposed to the usual red tide. Got everything crossed now that this is an implantation bleed BUT I'm really aware that I don't have any of the symptoms I had with my other two pregnancies (in fact I don't feel pregnant at all) and that this may just be because my hormones are screwy after mmc.

Made husband buy a FRER on the way home while I was picking up a puky DS from nursery. So will be POAS in the morning. Reckon it will be a BFN, in which case I'll be on here early having a whinge!

Still here

Dtd again tonight, no longer in fertile window but every little helps

I'm on a night shift tonight so spare a thought as you cozy down to sleep (I'm not jealous honest ??)

Have just read an article about implantation and early pregnancy tests. It says it can take up to a week to get a BFP with an FRER after implantation. If it was an implantation bleed I really hope I don't have to wait a week.

wiggly I have everything crossed for you xx

Fx wiggly.

popz did we not join the thread about the same time? I remember Lala joining.

I'd like to make it clear that I don't have, nor never had, a crush on Lovejoy. Although my sister fancied Neil Morrissey in Boon.

Popz and wil we all joined same Fred, me after you guys just went back and looked geek

Haha really? I think the thread moved a lot slower then. Was it February?

Wilma the Neil Morrissey comment made me laugh out loud. No one can fancy Bob the Builder.

She had weird taste. Was also in love with Bjorn Borg.

Noooo, Becker beats Borg in the sexiness stakes any day of the week. Especially as he has a bit of a naughty boy reputation.