April TTC girls head into September - Autumn and BFPs here we come

[iamdivergent]

Stats so far (you know me, probably wrong! Argh!)

Steph1204 TTC # 1, 2nd cycle, BFP 12 june, EDD: 20/2/15
lillamyy1 TTC #1 cycle 4 BFP 11/8/14 EDD 18/4/15
Ducky23 TTC#2, cycle 1 BFP on April 17th EDD 25/12/14
Cupcake92 TTC #2 Cycle 4 BFP on July 22nd 2014 EDD 05/04/14
LuluJakey1 Age 35 TTC#1 Cycle1 BFP Late May?? EDD 04/01/15
bearsinmotion ttc#2, BFP 26 June, EDD 25/02/15
Poppet85 ttc#1 cycle 3 BFP 5th June EDD 10/2/15
Kitkatkaty87 ttc #1, cycle 1, BFP 7th June EDD 15/2/15

iamdivergent ttc #3, heading into cycle 8 (BFP/AF around about 24/08)
MrsPopple29 ttc #1, cycle 5 (August)
Me624 cycle 4 (?)
21questions ttc #2 (cycle 1 august) Age 30
ToriB34 Age 34 TTC #1 (mmc July)
bradders
Siarie, TTC #1, cycle 2 not sure when AF due as last cycle was irregular
LenaW2109 cycle 6
CP1299 I am 35 TTC1 cycle 1
Tylastar TTC #1
Macmissy Age 34 TTC#1 Cycle3 (+ cycle 3MMC Aug 14)

The successful list is getting so much longer - fx for the rest of us!

Cupcake I don't think I would be unhappy because I would be with DH and the baby and we would have lots of family support and friends. There are some lovely areas around there and I have lived in Yorkshire before and loved it. We would just make our family together there instead of here-I would cope with that. It's not like I would be leaving my family because I don't have one. DH is my family.

But my job is a different. I have worked so hard to get where I am and I love it and I know I do a really good job and make a difference for the children.

He would not push this, but we have talked about it tonight and I don't want to just say no and him to feel resentful afterwards because I would be really taking a huge chance away from him.

He thinks there would be job opportunities for me - his mum keeps her eye out and has contacts and I would probably pick something up easily but not at the level I am now which I kind of resent. But then, what if I don't want to go back after having the baby? And I have messed up this option for him by then. We do want another baby in a couple of years.

I don't know......I hate decisions. I love my house. DH says we would build another home together and I know he is right, and there is lots of green space and countryside for the cats round there which would be just as safe.

I'm sorry you are feeling so bad Cupcake - I think Tori is right, give yourself a bit of time to come to terms with losing the baby. You need some healing time.

This is ridiculous !!! Some idiot is having a loud party on the street and the music is soooo loud it's waking DS up!!! I hate inconsiderate people sometimes!!

That makes me so angry cupcake hope it didn't go on for too long

I'd move and let me tell you why. If I was in his position I would hope that my DH would want to move to better "US" rather than one person.

I've actually done this, we moved 100 miles to a new city as DH got an amazing contract which was lots more money and exciting work. I moved and I'm totally happy, i left a great career and I would have done very well but he is always going to earn more than me and now I don't work at all. Which makes a difference, it all depends what you want but you can be happy and excel anywhere.

Lulu, I hope u make the decision that benefits the both of u :)
Try not to stress too much over it tho, either way, I'm sure u will both be very happy wherever u are :)

And Ducky..... (Just spelt ur name there and it came out as Dicky!! How embarrassing!!) no. It went on for agessssssssssssssssss! I ended up sleeping on the sofa with DS as he wouldn't go back to sleep. Lol!

Off to a meal this afternoon with my whole family :) to celebrate my great nan turning 90!! :O
Can't wait as I love having family get togethers! :)

Oh yeah I took a pregnancy test but it came out positive still. A faint one but means hormone is still in my body. Fx is goes soon

Siarie- but he won't always earn more than me. I earn more than him now and have the potential to be a Headteacher. I am nearer to it than he is in terms of career steps. He is about 5 years behind me and I have a much broader experience.

If I give up my job now- even if he earns an extra £14000 in this new one- we will be about £38000 a year worse off overall, it might be more actually thinking about it. Anyway, it is a lot, and I would ruin my career prospects.

Even if I tried to get a job down there, no school would employ someone who was on maternity leave. If I resigned from my job I would have to pay back 3 months half-salary of my occupational maternity pay.

I would also then have a break in continuous employment so would not be entitled to further maternity pay unless I then worked for continuous period in one school of about 18 months- according to gov website.

It makes no financial sense at all to do this.

DH is busy doing the sums properly and I am leaving him to it. He will get a shock I think.

My worry is, I might not want to go back to work! I can't imagine it but what if I don't. Then we would lose my salary and he would have turned this job down. But that is why we have worked to pay the mortgage off, have no debts and save ever month so we have a cushion. He could get promotion up here- he might have to wait and prove himself a bit more and the job will have to come up that he wants and gets but it would happen. Or he could give up work and be a SAHD.

I am not going- that is my feeling this morning. I softened a bit last night but I am hard- hearted today.

Cupcake - where I used to live we had an awful neighbour moved in. He was an alcoholic and violent to his wife and they had two small children. It was awful- the noise and the behaviour and what those poor children sat through. Soc services and the police were always there and the wife just kept going back to him or having him back. They moved on after about 6 months but I. often wonder about those children.

Sorry Cupcake. FX for a BNP soon, followed by a BFP soon after.

Cupcake - oops, that should have said a BFN not a BNP- who wants a BNP in their lives!

You need a BFN soonest, followed quickly by a BFP

Bless u lulu! And trust me ull want to go back to work! It sounds very harsh but eventually u need a break from baby and work is that break. That very needed break haha.

N that's awful those poor children! :( I hope the wife and children all got away.

Hi everyone, I havent been around for a while, but I've caught up on the thread.
Sorry everything's been so hard cupcake Glad your H is being a DH again though!!
And Ducky, I hope your 'H' has improved! It sounds very difficult, my hat's off to you dealing with all the crap he gives you.
well, I'm still off work and still feeling horribly sick and exhausted constantly. Every morning DH's breath makes me retch! I have to keep asking him to turn over so he doesnt breathe on me! Also still cant stand the smell of my housemate's washing liquid and fabric conditioner. I had to ask her to use Daz instead - it's the only one that doesn't make me want to puke!
I honestly didnt expect it to be quite this debilitating... and I feel like a wimp as well because I dont know of anyone else having to be off work (apart from the princess! - but she's actually being sick loads and being treated for it do obviously worse than me!) Everyone else just seems to be getting on with it. I'm so tired and have such 'baby brain' that there's no way I could be working at the moment, especially feeling so sick all day as well.
I feel bad complaining when I know Tori and Cupcake have had such a horrible time though I should think myself lucky and I do really, but just so sick of being sick!
Was anyone else ridiculously exhausted at the beginning?

Hi lil

Sorry your still feeling so crap! H is still not so very d

I was completely exhausted... Still am

Have started getting bits for my hospital bag though which is exciting.

Lulu, I have no suggestions about your dilemma, it must be very difficult, but make sure whatever you do is something that will make you happy

That's very exciting Ducky! I can't wait to get to the point there I'm packing my hospital bag!

I think I've just seen 2 of the most weirdest tv adverts ever. One was a cuddlely toy animal that suddenly turns into a onesie!! And another was also a you pet that u squeeze and it farts!!! Who thinks of these toys?'!?!?

Lilla so sorry ur so sick :( :( must be awful bless u!! Hope u feel better soon

I've just started having an AF-type cramp on one side A bit worried but no bleeding as yet. Could it be normal?

Lill I had an awful couple of weeks but have been fine since then. There were a few days where it was all day and any movement, made it worse, as well as food and smells. My FIL went and got me organic ginger tea and ginger biscuits and it did help a bit but I know other people who it has done nothing for.
Are you actually being sick or is it a feeling of nausea. With me it was more the feeling. I was only actually sick a few times- once on DH when he kissed me. It wasn't him, I just was about to do it. I wasn't off work although one morning I sort of slumped in my office for an hour incapable of movement.
It was horrible and you have my sympathies. My friend ate dry toast a lot, or dry crackers. Another one drank iced tea and sucked ice cubes. Another one swears by barley sugar sweets. Horses for courses I think. And it was just exhausting. It stopped overnight and I have felt great since- apart from bouts of tiredness if I overdo it. Hope you wake up and it has gone!

Ducky we have decided we are going to go down next weekend. It is a huge loss of money if I give my job up and it makes no sense. DH has done his sums and is shocked. But he also has to feel it is not right emotionally so he is going on Friday lunchtime on the train and will spend the afternoon in the school and stay until about 5.30 and I will drive down after work. We'll stay with PIL (not telling them) and just look around the areas and get a ferl for how we could live and then decide but I think it will be no. I don't want him to feel I made the decision. I want him to come to the same conclusion and I think he will. I am not being negative when we discuss it. We are making a big plus and minus list as we think of things- it is on the kitchen wall.

We are about to go out for a walk up the coast. It is lovely today up here, can just feel autumn on the brink. that is another thing- the sea, no sea down there.

Sounds like your H is getting to you

I am a bit like that Cupcake - if DH squeezes me I fart Another joy of being pregnant. I am certainly not like that usually.

Lill I have had all kinds of aches and pains that have felt like AF, appendicitis, cramps etc. I think you just stretch inside and that is what it is.

Hahaha cupcake I have seen the advert for them farty things!!!

Lil how many weeks are you now? I hae had the cramps a few times, it's everything stretching

Lulu I would love to live by the sea! I think the list of plus' and minus' is a good idea, when looking at the income have you factored in child care too? That makes a big difference. You should stay though if it where makes you happy.

Hello ladies I have just caught up with the thread.

Lulu sounds like you have a tough decision there, but sounds like you are considering everything so you and dh can make the right choice for the both of you.

I am on cd 11. Tried opk this month just IC. Got a real strong positive lunchtime today. Dh away tonight back tomorrow teatime. But we have dtd for the past 4 days running including this morning so hopefully we got it covered.

Hope all you other ladies are well.

Thanks everyone. I really hope it goes soon - I dont know how much more I can take! Ducky, I'm 9+4 weeks.
And lulu, i'm really windy as well! Those toys sound weird, Cupcake - I'll have to look out for the ad!
Hope you catch the egg 21!

21 I think you get a positive 24ish hours before ov, double check on the instructions but sounds like you will have it covered anyway! Fingers crossed!!

Lil, that's probably normal stretching

I think I'm going to try opks next month if I don't get a bfp this month. Can anyone recommend the ones they use?

I'm off on holiday this time next week and AF is due between Wednesday and Friday, so it should have come before we go if it's coming. But AF has been late before, so I'm not sure whether I should pack some tests!

Me I got them from amazon. They were 7.90 for 50. Sorry I don't remember how to post a link but if you google amazon opk try come straight up. Seem to work ok only thing is you have to dehydrate yourself for a couple of hours before you test and you are not supposed to use fmu. I think you should deffo pack tests if no AF before you go!

I got a bunch of cheapies of e bay,