Don't risk sending piss by post. Get your BFP the JS way! Slip on your disco pants, pet the full moon unicorn, and get jizzy in all the right places (just not the carpet). It's Just Shaggin' Part 25!

[Redshoes56]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied and adapted from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

JIAC = Jizz in a Cup. Preferable to jizz on the carpet. This one's for the lucky men in our lives.

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 24 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/a2078980-Come-one-come-all-the-Jason-Doner-Van-is-open-for-business-Don-your-disco-pants-brandish-your-rim-brush-and-get-on-it-Its-Just-Shagging-part-24-Can-we-beat-23s-BFP-hat-trick-flange-wankers?" target="_blank">here</a> 

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/2100803-Just-Shagging-Grads-Thread-9-Roll-Up-Roll-Up-all-you-graduated-Viroids" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a>

Happy shagging, shaggers!

I have been trying for months to change, mind you I was fairly well known with my other NN so I am enjoying at anonymity! Please feel free to call me whatever you wish

evening viroids.

welcome back before

rpopz yanbu IMO. my dad was too drunk to remember I invited him over to see my new house and didn't see why I was upset about it and proceeded to tell me he didn't care about my life, seeing e get married or having kids. other than my brothers wedding where I was nothing but polite and a fb chat ending with him telling me to f off (he started the chat not me) I haven't spoken to him for 4 years. best thing I have ever done. I do miss him and I hate that it's like this, but it has saved me so much heartache and upset. why should you always be the one to make the effort, he should want to know how you are.

sorry mammoth post!

hi newbies

I think I need a name change... suggestions?

Oh these dad stories are really sad, you all deserve better Viroids. Something that contains 'Lil' Lil so we can still call you the same thing!

Evening viroids. AF has packed up and buggered off - unusually short stay this month - but JS will have to wait. I'm not seeing DP until next weekend as we're both working away. We're going to a cheese and wine party next weekend and then Glastonbury the weekend after so I'm probably going to have pickled eggs for now anyway.

Name: littleluna89
Age:25
DC: 19 month old DD
Ttc: cycle #1 (last dreaded depo injection in November 2013)

Hi, hope it's ok to jump in and join you all! I expect I'll be here for a good long while courtesy of the DDI! (dreaded depo injection)

well I've never nc before so hopefully this worked.... and hopefully you all know its me

wow it worked! been meaning to do that for ages!

hi Luna welcome to the mad house!

Hi lil and thanks :D

Morning viroids! Hi luna welcome

Newbies was it the piss in the title that attracted you to the Fred? Lots of new people, nice to see you all!

Still mourn lack of smurfette popz but LaLa i am and I will stay.

Has flag gone now?

wil even when I phoned my dad yesterday out of keeping peace he was drunk and slurring. He has serious issues. He loves me but he is an alcoholic who is very selfish and doesn't ever think about other people, just himself. Been a very difficult few years but now I just get on with my life and keep the peace by phoning when needed - if I didn't I would get phone calls asking why not .

Morning viroids!
It's minion calling from Tuscany. (A la Eurovision)
Hello newbies, welcome aboard the good ship shagtastic. Please read up on the emergency life saving placards (a sense of humour and gin/wine) and don disco pants only once the emergency doors are opened.
Have a safe journey!

Hi before, so glad you are back with us. People spreading news which isn't theirs to spread really fuck me off so you have my sympathy.

Weathers a bit gash over here, typical. But it's quiet, relaxing and pretty so I can forgive.

Morning viroids. Welcome to all the new posters. Limited JSing here at the moment, combination of heat, bad hay fever and something called the World Cup appears to be getting in the way. I think AF should be due in next day or so though so hopefully we did enough earlier in the month. Superdrug had tests on offer so ready to POAS at a moment's notice

Minion hope you have a nice holiday, we are off at the weekend but not quite such an exotic location!

ah min sorry the weather sucks. hope tomorrow is better and stays that way. I sense perhaps you enjoyed being on a plane again my lovely are you missing not being grounded?

Just counted and there are now 24 on this Fred, around 8 currently upduffed. Surely this Fred cannot fail to bring some bfps?

Have an amazing hol min loving the inflight safety announcement. Speaking of that has anyone seen mich/snow?

Oh hang on I think I'm mixing mich up with min. Senile (me not you)

LaLa I envy your flag! I got brazil in the sweep at work and Portugal too. I want a flaaaaaaaaag!

We've been JSing so much I can hardly walk and have an array of shameful hickeys.

Morning Vroids! min I have holiday jealousy!

couldbeanyone I am so over the World Cup already!! My only small mercy (I think) is that DH is too busy playing computer games to have any interest in the World Cup, he enjoys it even less than the TV shows I obsessively watch...

In answer to your question lala I noticed there were four repeating threads: this one, Penis dragon, BESH and The berries and whereas the others current threads were quite long JS had just started a new thread so it seemed a bit easier to catch up.

plus all the abbreviations were explained in the top post and I rather liked the idea of obsessively taking temperatures and peeing on ovulation sticks being contraband as I have no intention this side of cycle #12 of entertaining the thought of any of that, my plan for cycle 1-12 is let DH have all the Shagging like Something he wants and trusting that nature will take it's course, might put slightly more planning and forethought in past that point mind!

Hi Luna, welcome.

Gaggia you're quids in, how much do you get if when you win? Your 'hickeys' made me laugh. I don't think I've had one for about 20 years! I'm so fucking old

I think Mich must be concentrating on the new job. Hope she checks in at some point though.

Ah I like Lildottie, good choice (and easy for us, more importantly - that was your error Lala)!

Lala, that sounds tough. I was very lucky with my Dad, just wish he would have been around to meet the grandkids.

Pisghetti SO jealous you're going to Glastonbury. Always wanted to go but think I'm probably past it by now! Have loads of fun.

Thanks Wil but we are the same age! Not sure I'd fancy it when upduffed though - festival toilets bork and if you accidentally wander into the hippy bit you won't be allowed to leave without attending the 'ecstatic birth' workshop

Morning viroids and welcome new viroids!

I am a bloated mess, sporting a little baby like belly! AF could come anytime from today CD26 (like last month) to Friday. Not feeling very positive at all, so just want her to turn up then leave!

Got so used to my mirena with no symptoms whatsoever, hate this :(

Morning all,

Popz I have been thinking about your dilemma and I think the path that brings you the least hassle could be the way to go. If you think calling him is the path to peace, do that, if you think it'll bring more trouble, then don't. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do.

Otherwise I am at the end of my tether with DS. He had a tummy upset last week and was out of childcare for three days. Then back on Friday and fine all weekend... then an hour on the potty this morning, little love. It's vile. Mr Before and I have missed so much work between us and lost a lot of goodwill, but with no family locally, I haven't the foggiest idea what to do. Have just cancelled our lovely day out and it's wall-to-wall cbeebies again, while I try to keep him off dairy and cross everything he'll be alright for tomorrow.

Anyone with any ideas how to make it stop. Please!

Sorry you're not doing great Kato . I hope if AF is coming, she gets on with it.

Oh pooh. I've been visited by ERTD. And I thought we JS'd all month with such enthusiasm too. to the point I was sore and had backache for a week

It's supposed to be fun, right?!

Lovely viroids - I'm just popping in to say hi.
Update on my pg is that I'm now due ina month and getting huge, Santa-style.
(Not the beard, the belly! )
Hence my final NC.

move went ok (3 weeks ago) and we are settling in nicely.
And thankfully none of us misses the old house, which is good.

I have now been diagnosed with PGP (pelvic girdle pain) and I have stopped doing schoolruns, shopping etc as the pain can be triggered by lifting, carrying, even just walking...very frustrating , but not long now.

I hope you are all ok, I think of you a lot.
wishing for lots of BFPs on this shiny new thread - go viroids!!!!!!
(Rubbing my belly for good luck is still on offer! )

Before

only thing I can think is to give him diarolyte (sp?) to slow down the diarrhoea & replace lost liquid and stuff.

zing hi! Lovely to hear the move went well. Good luck with the new baby when the zingling finally arrives.

Wil I might win 28! Weeeeee I feel lucky.
my hickeys are hideous no amount of scarf will completely cover them. Let that be a warning to you all, never get jiggy on prosecco!