The Berries: On knockerwatch, sniffing willies and clinging to the coat tails of the continued clusterdiff (thread 21)

[barkingtreefrog]

The smallprint –
Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 12+ months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot and definitely no mention of baby dust or baby dancing).
Those not abiding by the rules may be escorted from the premises.

Thanks for all the good wishes. All went fine, just waiting to leave. No endo and the only thing of note is that my uterus has an indent in the top. Apparently that's not a concern th

*oops...though. So good all clear but no explanation for heavy or painful periods.

That's good tiger but bit annoying that there's no reason for your heavy periods, at least if they'd found endo then you'd know that was what it was. Maybe you are just blessed with thick lining! They will prob send you a letter summing up what they found afterwards so that'll be interesting reading.

Well I'd have been obliviously licking Mr Whippy without knowing that, it's a fair point I suppose. Does that mean you don't bother eating them normally either then?

Take your point about the cycling barking and can totally identify with the not doing anything you'd later regret. I was like that too and didn't have sex until after my scan. Yes, get me, we dtd and it was flipping good!! Since then I've almost been a bit more laissez faire about the whole thing, still haven't been back to yoga though but have dtd and had a shandy- naughty naughty! Also I'm still a bit paranoid as there's optional tennis training tomorrow which I thought I might do but then I thought what if I get hit in the stomach, and don't really want to say I'm pg as I almost, at this stage, feel a bit of a fraud at this stage. Total grrr about you dh's loser friend, it's not fair is it!! They'll probably breeze through the whole thing too. I felt really annoyed in a similar vein as my cousin was pg 3 mths after her wedding and her bloke is a massive boozer, smoker, looks about 50 but is actually in his forties, is a total loafer, no job, lazy lummox but clearly his sperm have more drive then he actually does!! What's up with you today? Not on fb so don't know why you've taken day off. Hope everything is quiet on pant watch for you and the day's done you good after a rather stressful week. I've been working at home today and it's been really nice to have a change of pace, still got lots done but nice not to be in the manic-ness that is school.

Did anyone else hear that rik mayall has died? Doesn't say why but that a statement would be released in the fullness of time.

Glad all went well Tiger. Good news that they didn't find anything of concern.
Yes Barking Holly Willoughby is diffed again. She got pg by accident. As you do
Bushy v sad to hear about Rik Mayall. I wonder if it is in some way with the accident that he has about 15 years ago?

Tiger good news though in the main. Doesn't sound like there is an obvious fertility issue? By dent, do they mean you have a bicornate uterus?

Lumen hang on in there

So sorry to whinge..... I just feel like Batking, where I have a bfp and I should just be grateful, no matter the outcome! But it is messing with my head. So every few hours or maybe twice a day, I'll have a little gushlet of discharge that is shot through with old blood or just faint brownish. Then everything clear and fine for several hours. I don't know if it is the start of something or just normal. Will have to wait and see. Made appt with GP for Thurs just to tell her and ask for opinion re bleeding.

Day from hell tomorrow, daylong meeting 90 miles away in a town I have never been to before, driving by myself. Getting up early to avoid rush hour!

rp honestly don't worry - you're in the right place for hand holding through every little twinge! Those that have been through it can advise, the rest of us can offer support and certainly from my point of view, learn and prepare for when is our turn! Hope the journey tomorrow is ok just give yourself plenty of time. is the train an option?

Pregnant by accident eh, just fell on a cock did you holly?! Grrrr!

Hallo all. have just caught up with the weekend's reading. At this rate we'll be on a thread a week! (not complaining)

feather i was thinking of you on sat as we attended our wedding (as guests). Made up for you that the weather wasn't as bad as predicted. So glad you had a good day.

tiger good news about your scan. Although - do you feel that? I had a similar experience (except for the dented womb) and felt pleased for a few days, then meh, and now feel it's no answer. anyway - pleased?

lumen good news that you\ve responded to the drugs. It's funny with IVF, everyone I know has had the "oh god it's happening RIGHT NOW" feeling once it starts.

happy great news from your fc. Interesting about the clumping. I am motivated to go private just because you seem to get much more of a personalised service. FX for a FUFC though of course.

Rosie sorry you're feeling down. V admiring of the meditation - way to defy the FSF. (PS, I have invented this fairy because sometimes I feel she's not around and other times she comes and sprinkles me with insanity dust and I turn into a lunatic.)

barking, bushy, RP I think we all can relate to the mental stress. We get it. Others definitly don't. Stick around PS Pictures of Kate middleton always make me want to cry, but not for fertility related reasons.

HB as others have said, really touched by your generosity of heart. What a trooper you are.

Hallo to chloe, Serenity, wildflower and anyone else I've missed…

What is this fresh madness about no ??? i cannot survive without my bike. it's the way I avoid most human interaction!!!! I am highly sceptical about all the 'no exercise' advice. I mean cycling doesn't even shake bogies loose, how can it affect a small group of cells within an organ. V unlikely in my view. Of course I totally get the 'what if' and 'shoudl i take the risk' thoughts brought by the Fertility Stress Fairy. But I defy you Fertility Stress Fairy! damn you fun police, i will live my life!

On that note, I'm off to down a bottle of wine in the face of my disapproving teetotal (but otherwise v nice) SiL. I can't take undergraduates, the smug little bstards. Plus, weekend of hell: nephew's 1st birthday party (2 sets grandparents competing with each other and ignoring OH as WE HAVE NO BABY), then wedding of instadiffer (wedding moved because, oh hilarious, she got updiffed month 1 and was due on her wedding day! hilarious! ) for which I was designated driver. The whoel weekend was saturated with other people's pregnancies and babies, and lacking the character of some of you lovely ladies (HB* I'm looking at you) I jsut wanted to kill everyone. Comprimise on having a totally ludicrous argument with OH. yay!

anyway, despite this post am actually feeling fine. because I am hiding from the fertility stress fairy.

holly willoughby? what a waste of skin

Tiger glad you are recovering from the lap, so I guess good news if not a bit frustrating....

Hope everyone survived the sunny day at work, I wish I'd made like my boss and not gone in!

So I survived the baby shower but only just; I really hate how everyone presumes that this is a time that you can discuss absolutely anything and pry into your life and ask the dreaded "oh it'll be your turn next" comments that invariably come when your younger bestie gets instadiffed! Grrrrr. So one more to go, but I know the family land friends of this friend a little less so hoping that there are none of those comments again or so help me I may actually kill someone One positive did come out of it and that is that a friend has invited me to stay on my week off; she had two mc' when trying to conceive her DS and so gets where I am coming from.

I can't remember who posted the link to the article about grief but it really struck a chord with me. I think that the author was bang on the money and really feel that I am grieving not only for the baby that wasn't but for the infertility issues in general. I am however insightful so I'm hoping that the session wither the counsellor will help.

Barking and those currently waiting the scans, don't be too hard on yourselves, feeling anxious about things is normal for any pg lady let alone one who goes through what we do to get there (if that makes any sense at all!)

Just catching up a bit...

happy amazing that you got the SA results straight away. Sounds odd but i guess the main thing is that the clumping isn't present. Time for a pre-wedding diff! Did your dh feel at all embarrassed about having to offer up the goods then discuss it right away?! I know mr tiger would, he gets so embarrassed (and has the cutest embarrassed face!)

beaky hope your cycles have settled down now but enjoying yourself in the meantime sounds like a good plan!

Congratulations feather and enjoy your honeymoon! I love the seaside and vintage shops! I like whitby for that, plus they have goth and folk weekends - eccentric English seaside at its best!

rosie sorry you got a bfn. We were in Wales too yesterday! Glad you enjoyed the festival.

barking I hate those no fair pg announcements! Booo to instadiffers who don't even give up their bad habits. Hope you are managing to relax at home. Today was my first sick day since 2006 - over 8 years!

lumen you're another step closer! Hope you're feeling ok?

bushy is it Thursday your scan?

Tiger DP produced his sample right after the appointment then they rang with the results 2-3 hours later so no face to face discussion required. DP has no shame anyway though!! She did say that if he didn't feel psyched up for an unexpected SA he could come back another day, but he was like 'Nope I'm good to go.....' So I whilst I was having the dildocam upstairs DP was producing the goods downstairs!

Loving all the visitors to Wales over the weekend. We could have had an impromptu Berry meet up!

Nolly lol at "doesn't even shake bogies loose" and the FSF!

Hello ladies! Just stopping by, I tried reading this thread's 400+ posts but oh my, so much going on! Hugs and belly rubs to Batking and RP and I'm sure I have missed others so please do forgive me! but I'm excited for all the clusterdiff!

Me, I'm living the life of a pug mom, he took his first leash walk today and it was soooo funny, he is so damn cute we can't walk for a minute without being stopped. And when he's had enough of walking he just plonks himself down on the floor and I have to pick him up. I wuw him.

I've also picked up quite a bit of yoga classes so I'm keeping myself busy on my year off! Since DH and I decided to stop trying, I've regained mental clarity and I feel that I can start planning or at least aiming for the rest of my life. It's a bit of a shame that it got to this but right now the main emotion is one of relief as I was taking it really emotionally and getting really down about it all.

Big hugs!

X posts nolly and hb...

nolly that is how I feel. I guess I wanted something that can be fixed and explained but glad it's all looking good. Bloody hell, what a weekend! Get that wine, quick!

hb it's unbearable isn't it it but people just don't realise how upsetting it can be or seem aware that others might be having trouble conceiving. You're a superstar though and I hope so much that your time comes soon. I also have found that a couple of good friends I told recently were remarkably unsympathetic - kept telling me to 'make the most of it'! That article was great wasn't it?! I'm going to email it to my best mate as a way of explaining how I feel.

Here is my nurse - she keeps peering at me and insisting on escorting me to the toilet!

happy a bloody accident?!

rp sorry you're still getting the constant stress, no point in me saying it's normal as I know it doesn't help .

tiger will you have a follow up appointment?

nolly I defied the fsf last time, didn't work out too well for me so I'm taking no chances this time .

bushy details are too outing, hence asking for advice on fb, but very basic story is that I couldn't face the classroom today for a number of reasons. In the spirit of doing everything I can to look after myself this time I called my head and told her I wouldn't be in, and spent most of the day sleeping instead.

I am not letting any of you pg ladies go. Please stay here. Just as the others have said, you are bound to feel anxious and it's good to share and let us others know what to expect.

Nolly, at FSF. Hiding is my usual response but my work has been suffering so I have to come out. There are a couple of work-related trips coming up that I need to prepare. And thanks to the meditation I did actually do better today. So will have to stick with it. Seems to be the only thing that works at least a little bit. Oh, and I love my too but DP has threatened to take it away when we fall pg as I keep coming off it. oops. So I get batking's concern, especially with others on the road endangering you more than you would do yourself.

HB, glad you survived the baby shower. Hope the next one will be easier on you.

Lumen, congrats on getting to the next stage. Fingers crossed all will go well. Keep us up to date.

In other (good) news, a new found friend has found out that her first Ivf round worked. Yay! And this also got me out of spending the weekend with ex and new girlfriend. Double yay!

xpost with just about everyone...

hb well done for surviving the weekend

tiger one sick day in 8 years? I'm assuming you don't work with germ-ridden kids! We're not allowed in the classroom within 24 hours of sickness & diahorrea after the last winter vomitting bug spread through the whole school! I think this is my 3rd absence this school year (first two were both mc related). Love the photo, dogs just know when you need some tlc don't they?

because glad to hear you're doing ok

rosie glad the meditation is helping, thanks for letting me stay!

Aargh I am a bad Berry! I can't believe how many posts there have been in the last couple of days, I need to go and swot up on all your goings on.

I'm going to be a bit AWOL for the next week as I am mega mega MEGA busy but I will try to read and keep up best I can, I just might not post much (but will of course be thinking of you all). I've not only got the FSF to deal with but also the WSF - I need (another) holiday!

Hugs to all of you, I have missed chatting with everyone. Sod all going on here anyway, exactly midway thru 2ww.

Tiger she is beautiful and I'm glad that she is looking after you. It's funny how the old hounds react to us; ever since the end of my treatment mine is avoiding me. I'm hoping it ends soon as I love him so much and he has brought me a lot of comfort before.

raindrops what is the WSF?

nolly I love you! Your rant at the w/e was class, sums up the frustration but v witty too. Your instadiffer friend with the wedding being moved forward- good god, it's like it's put there to wind us up!! Also love the attitude of get my life back and fighting the fertility stress fairy!! Know what you mean re the cycling, thanks for giving us a different perspective, obv the falling off or being knocked off bit is the worry so if we can pootle along cycle tracks all should be well.

tiger needs a big up too- rofl at holly willoughby just fell on a cock!!! And your nurse is just lovely, she knows you're not quite yourself, bless her. Is she the one that roaches?

hb I cannot stand it when I get asked stuff like that at these get togethers. Sometimes it's from people who you'd never reveal your plans to!! Why are they so nosy. I think tbh, it's just ignorance. Years ago before we'd even entertained ttc I actually remember asking a married friend a question like that ( I know, I was that person). Turns out she was pg at the time but was early days so she was just really vague about it. I didn't think it was wrong to ask at the time but I certainly wouldn't now.

Sounds like you made the right choice for you barking hope you feel better for it.

because hello!! Nice to hear from you, sounds like you're having a lovely time. Pugs are so cute, I would be stopping you in the street!!

Who was it that said pics of Kate Middleton make them cry but not related to ttc.. I'm curious as to why?

rp don't worry I'm still spotting a little bit and it had been quiet for a few days. Weird pulling feelings earlier so am stretched out on sofa. Back hurts too.

Thanks berries for being so nice about letting us inbetweeners stay on. I can't remember who said it but if I was reading and not pg I would be taking notes too! It's lovely to be able to share on here because I can say stuff that my dh might think was a bit silly.

I am a moron. I just read Bushy's post about the nurse roaching and completely did not connect it to the picture of the dog higher up. So I was picturing an NHS nurse roaching

bushy aw thank you xx

it was me who said about kate middleton. It's less cry, more vomit a bit in my mouth, to be honest. I'm sure she's a nice (but incredibly dull) girl but I find it depressing how conservative our royalty are. Can't she get a job? No, she's just going to calve for her master.

I forgot to say earlier beaky thanks for posting that article. I read it on the train last night and while it made me feel weepy, it was only in the way that I do reading stuff from you guys. I can't remember who said it but some author wrote once that the joy of reading is that you have had ideas batting around in your head for ages (I'm paraphrasing) and when you read somewhere something that someone else has written which expresses what you feel perfectly, it's as if someone has reached out and taken your hand. Ditto the poem barking.

None of the cluster diff are allowed to leave us, you may join the chopper but you cannot leave us. I have already learnt so much on here about ttc I general (learnt that I am weird for never having poas), IVF and now early pg and the worries that come with it. In my ignorant pre mn life I thought ttc was the hard part and the 2ww the worst waiting bit, innocent little lumen

And nolly well done in getting through the weekend from hell. If you got out of it with only one argument with your oh you are a strong woman.

I wish I could see pics on the app, I was also confused on the roaching or reaching as auto correct wanted nurse