The Berries: Projecting the sausage signal and chasing rainbows whilst chanting FUFC in the hunt for that elusive BFP (thread 19)

[happylass]

The smallprint –
Berries have a strict entrance criteria (TTC #1, over 30, TTC for 12+months, NO instadiffers, must have a special pot and def no mention of baby dust or baby dancing UGH !!! Ooooh aren’t we strict!

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Good morning all,

Otters thanks for the recipe suggestions. Tried the kale one straight away, it was really nice.

feather, I agree with the others, I cannot see anything wrong with asking for honeymoon donations. Hope the acupuncture will work for you.

Beaky, great news on the fast moving list. Just echoing what others have said, feeling overwhelmed and unprepared sounds perfectly normal to me and a treat at the weekend seems like a great idea. Hope you're feeling more excited today.

barking keep us up to date with the gf verdicts. Sounds like no sugar is the diet to go for.
I have been munching away on too much chocolate and biscuits these last weeks. I am running out of energy and next Friday cannot come soon enough (we're off on holiday then). So apologies from me for lack of meaningful and supportive posting for the last couple of days. I am struggling with the combined stress of work (manic), 1st FC appointment coming up (Monday), and being away from the family when they are going through a difficult time (my mother is caring for my dying grandfather). Best not to dwell.

Happy, good luck today. I hope you'll get some answers. I am sending positive vibes.

feather I'd love to go to festival no 6 but it always seems to clash with something - this year we will be in Italy. Might try green man or end of the road this year. Also wanted to go to Latitude but we're away that weekend too!

happy hope today goes well!

kami that sounds like a lot to deal with. Just focus on your holiday and don't beat yourself up about eating chocolate!

Gosh lots to read, will catch up properly later!
Just a quick good luck for today to happy! Let us know how it goes x

Thanks tiger

We went to Green Man years ago and I really liked it - still my favourite festival (also due to the fact that it is my only festival experience, so don't take me too seriously).

kami There is NO WAY I am ever going no sugar. Cutting down, yes, but as soon as I tell myself I can't have it I crave it all the time.

feather I spent over half an hour trying to find a festival we could go to this year - they're all while we're away over summer or already have plans - I excitedly looked up the festival number 6 as I hadn't heard of that one but it's the same weekend as my mate's 40th :o(.

happy when is your appointment? Good luck!

kami sorry to hear about your grandfather. The work stress is also shit esp when ttc stuff is on top of that. Hope you have a lovely holiday in a weeks time & good luck got FC on Monday.

Tiger you can get gluten free soy sauce- not sure if you knew that. We are supposed to be smep'ing too this month but will see how that goes!

Fx for all the b's then Barking! Erm I'd happily take twins.... But that's just me being greedy

Oh kami, sorry that things are so tough. Be kind to yourself.

Beaky Wow, that was fast! I'm going to push for IUI when I have my FC app in May. If their going to move me onto injectables anyway then it seems sensible to go the whole hog and get IUI, right?

Good luck with your appointment happy.

I've always found toasting the GF bread makes it much better Barking. Also, here in Edinburgh lots of takeaways do GF food for when you're feeling naughty. (Pizza, chinese, thai etc) so it's worth phoning round where you are. Sadly, I'm now low carb as well as GF so no bread, pasta etc for me. Sniff.

Oooh, festivals. I love a good festival but tend towards the smaller cheaper 'boutique' and closer to home ones these days. Having said that, I didn't book any for this year because I was supposed to be heavily pregnant this summer

Feather it was me who mentioned not asking for honeymoon donations but not because I think it's wrong. I got freaked out by all of the ridiculous mn threads which seemed to think it was a heinous crime. After reading the Berries responses however, DP and I are going to stick honeymoon donations onto our online gift list . In fact, I'm doing it right now!

Thanks for the support here. FC is private appointment but I was still surprised it would be so quick.

Sorry, rant alert, DP just told me that he went out to get drunk last night. He goes out with his mates practically every week and is 'proud' when he tells me he's only had a couple of pints. He still does not think that he should reduce his alcohol intake despite the upcoming SA on Monday (!) and the two tests that have shown lack of swimmers so far. Ok, Dr Google is in two minds about alcohol and sperm quality but I would have thought he'd try everything to be healthy. I don't think he gets the seriousness of the situation. But why should he, it's not him who is going to be prodded and poked and drugged. As a child I had to take lots of medication, so since my early twenties I have been using alternative remedies and tried to look after myself. No drugs, no hormones (no pill) etc. And now, all of this and the detox diets and the piles of kale and low carb stuff and no alcohol was for nothing and he cannot get through a week without going on the piss. Arrgh.

Sorry. You all sound so happy with your DHs and DPs that I feel bad about ranting about mine. Best focus on work, need to stop feeling a failure at least at one thing.

And beaky, I am with you on the twins. Bring them on.

Thanks ladies. En route to the FC now. Will report back later.

Hi All,

Wow, this thread is moving on at a pace - with working late I have been rubbish at keeping up but will try harder.

Firstly, Happy good luck at the clinic this morning will have everything crossed.

Kami sounds like you are having a hard time at the moment and a lot going on - hope that you manage to recharge your batteries a little. As for DH I empathize as I don't think that mine has quite got it yet despite our impending first cycle! It has taken a long time to get to the point that we all are and I do think that the men folk take a little longer. Perhaps one way to assist him in reaching the same conclusion is too ask some open questions at the FC next week? And you are definitely not a failure.

Because cervix scratching! WTF! Hope that you are feeling okay today.

Barking how is it going with the dietary changes? I bought a book on gluten and dairy free baking as my neighbour is intolerant of both (I bought it as the first time we went round I went armed with homemade scones with trimmings only to be informed that she could have neither!). There are some good recipes and it doesn't taste too bad. I am happy to forward on the details.

Beaky like others have said it is normal for it to feel like things are suddenly moving ahead of where your head is at - I don't think that there is one of us on here that doesn't / hasn't felt like that!

Anyway must crack on as working from home today!

Ah kami, rant away. I could rant about my DP too. In fact, I shall (to show solidarity with you!). DP also doesn't think he should reduce his alcohol intake, in fact it seems to have increased since we started ttc two long years ago. His reasoning is that his three SA's came back fine. So getting SA results that were okay means that he can do want he wants iyswim . I'm going to insist he gets another SA done, he's been soooo unhealthy in the past 12 months. He also has searingly hot baths once or twice a week which REALLY pisses me off. I'm talking ridiculously hot . But I don't want to have to keep nagging him. It's a vicious circle really. Plus, we got pregnant before (mmc) so it'll definitely happen again right? Um, no DP, not necessarily.

Like you I've had health problems since early childhood which meant lots of hospital visits, investigations, injecting myself four times a day since I was 8 years old. Plus I watch my diet, I low carb, I'm gluten free. And DP can't bloody just cut now on his beer and baths. Grrrrr.

Rant over. I love him dearly but he doesn't have to deal with ttc in the same way I do. Which is constantly.

We did honeymoon donations as we had practically 2 of everything already with us both having lived on our own first. We used an online site which you could set up so that people could contribute to a particular experience. We had quite an active honeymoon in NZ so there were plenty of "experiences" to list and we even put things on like a round of cocktails in X, ice creams in Y so covered all price ranges. We then took a photo of us doing the activity and sent that with our thank you cards so quite personalised in the end. In reality, all the money ended up in one bank account but I think people felt happier knowing that we were going to do something specific with their money.

Just a quick one to report back on the FC before I shoot back to work. Consultant is referring us for ICSI. Have to have all the blood tests done before we're referred which will probably be 4-6 weeks. Then we'll be put on the waiting list which is currently 12-18 months. Have pretty much decided that we'll have a private cycle and we're going to look in to that with a view to starting early September. He did say it isnt impossible for us to conceive naturally but it is probably going to be more difficult because of the clumpy sperm and my not so great AMH. Feel relieved to have a plan in place but got quite upset whilst we were in with the consultant. Think it was just a bit overwhelming to hear the reality of it all. DP also got on his soap box and started ranting about the state of the NHS in Wales so I think the consultant was just glad to get us out of there

Currently at work and on phone so will try to respond to a few if you other lovely Berries later. X

Happy glad that you have got some answers - FC appointments are overwhelming especially when you have some firm news and a plan, it suddenly makes it a lot more real.

happy will a private cycle affect whether you get the nhs cycle? not that you're going to need it
At least they didn't shove you on clomid! .
I get emotional just being at the FC, I think that's perfectly normal .

No Barking we're allowed 1 private cycle whilst waiting on the NHS list. Think they have to allow this to reduce the waiting lists a bit!

happy so pleased things are moving in the right dire too for you - great news! I don't blame you for feeling anxious and emotional - the news in black and white tends to be v overwhelming. I've done my fair share of blubbing at the FC.

Thanks all for honeymoon donations advice and opinion. Me and oh are going to stick with our plan and if anyone doesn't like it they can bugger off!

Direction NOT dire! Bloody iPhone!!

kami, otters it really is much easier for the menfolk isn't it?! I also initially had a hard time getting Mr Tiger to cut down but he has since done so. He thought we didn't drink much, and certainly compared to the wild days of our twenties we didn't, but I wanted to say hand on heart that we were doing everything we could to improve our chances. That said, all of my male friends carried on boozing whilst ttc and they all conceived no problem! It's a tough one.

happy good to hear you have a plan. Not surprised you were feeling emotional. I turn into a tongue tied weepy mess and that is not how I am in any other situation in my life I can tell you!

feather too right! I think you might be able set up your own web based donation thingy so people can buy you items for the trip without going through an agent etc or even booking a holiday.

On my way to acupuncture although getting out of work early was a nightmare...sooo busy. I would seriously kill for a glass of wine right now but instead it's needles followed by a healthy stir fry

Oh and is everyone else under a layer of smog?! It is grey and hazy here - miserable!!

Happy how exciting! You have a plan! Well, a Plan A and a Plan B which is even better.

Beaky also exciting! So what does it mean to be at the top of the list, is that just to talk to someone? Sounds like things are moving anyhow.

Because.... Cervical scratching? I am sat here with my legs crossed. Did it hurt? Why is it supposed to help?

Kami hang in there.

So today we ordered a new boiler and new render for the house! Still have to go to the bank to get loan for the render (gulp) which will be on the 12th but then we can get dates in place and start sorting our house out!

Also started AF today so CD1 here. Naturally we will be visiting PIL when I OV this month why does that always always happen?

Hello berries, I didn't want to alarm anyone! The cervix scratch was just your run-of-the-mill smear. Tomorrow I'm doing the dildocam - that will be fun...and on Monday I'm going back to the endocrinologist to discuss my mildly lazy thyroid.

Very excited for the berries that have plans and appointments in the near futures, also for wedding plans - for what is worth, I've often gifted honeymoon experiences (a nice dinner, a yoga class, that kind of thing) and have been very happy to do so.

Happy great that you now have a plan, do you feel any better for it? I cannot believe the length of the waiting list, it is so ridiculous that one place can be so long and others not. Fx for bfp before you need to pay for IVF. I'm not surprised your dp had a rant about the NHS the consultant probably hears it quite regularly with that waiting list.

RP I rang the FC this morning as per the letter and confirmed I still wanted to ahead and they are sending me some paperwork and an appointment to get started, she said in the next couple of weeks for the letter. It will be for iui. Good news about your house, everytime we are able to get some work done it feels great! It's so expensive though hey. Boo to AF showing up too.

Because good luck for dildocam! It was not as bad as I expected and the berries gave me some great advice of wear a skirt/dress. It was def better than trousers!