Drop all things contraband, we don't want you're OPK's here. Grab a cape, stroke the unicorn and reserve your spot in the pity Jacuzzi...It's JUST SHAGGING THREAD 21!!

[lil1ady]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 20 is <a class="break-all" href="//www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1961521-You-can-do-it-by-charting-analysing-testing-and-worrying-but-we-prefer-JUST-SHAGGING-PART-20?" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="//www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1817751-Just-Shagging-Grads-Fred-8-Roll-up-roll-up-all-Viroids-welcome" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="//www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a> <img loading="lazy" class="inline-flex mumsnet-emoji" alt="Grin" src="https://www.mumsnet.com/build/assets/grin-D7Eg_B6y.png">

Happy shagging shaggers!

I can't zoom in on my phone either! Post a link to the web page. We're an impatient lot! Has this friend got form for strange behaviour?

Im going to test using these cheapies and if ERTD doesnt come get a shop one

Something can you post the link to your 'canyouseealine' entry, so we can see it better. I think there may be something there, but really hard to see on this.

Urgh to the selfie thing. Nobody has nominated me, probably because I never wear make up - unless I'm on a night out, and even then I always feel like a drag queen if I wear mascara. But what I can't understand is why does nobody pull a stupid face... they're all trying desperately to look attractive. If anyone is stupid enough to nominate me, I've been practising my best cross eyed gurning face for my selfie. It will be fabulous

I'm having to visit the docs again today, I had severe abdominal pain last week (in a meeting, nearly passed out whilst trying to appear normal) and it seems to have left me with a niggling achey bladder. Bit worried about it, and didn't want to leave it over the weekend, so I've taken the plunge and booked a GP appointment. But I hate, Hate, HATE going to the doctors because I always feel like a hypochondriac on the verge of tears going "Sorry to bother you, I'm sure it's nothing, but ....." and always leave dissatisfied and wishing Id said more. So this time I've written down all my symptoms, just hope I don't cry

Aargh, anyway, distract us with your pee stick pics something !!

Im going to test using these cheapies and if ERTD doesnt come get a shop one

www.canyouseealine.com/view_home_pregnancy_test.php?testID=47278 a few people in a facebook group im on can see it.

She is really really weird. Apparantly she recieved a letter telling her that her baby would be delivered at 32 weeks and this was before the 12 week scan. He came at 38+3 in the end

Sorry www.canyouseealine.com/view_home_pregnancy_test.php?testID=47278

Sorry something i can't see a line, i would test in two more days, let the hcg build up abit.

I have my genetic counselling today we will find the risk's this baby has! Excited but nervous!

www.canyouseealine.com/view_home_pregnancy_test.php?method=desaturate&testID=47288 heres two together

Its ok cookie I cant decide if it is or isnt. Im not getting my hopes up just incase.
Genetic counselling must be quite interesting!

Well there is definitely a line but it isn't the same thickness as the control. Does that matter? (I haven't peed on many sticks so am a bit useless).
Oh dear she sounds desperate for attention, it's a bit of a shame really.

The camera doesnt pick it up great because its so faint. It appears to be the same thickness in real life but who knows?!

I think im just unlucky and get evaps multiple times!

Oh Wil that's exactly how I feel about going to the GP! Doesn't help that last time I went to talk to her about myissues with anxiety (which at that point had just ruined an entire fortnight's holiday in Greece) she told me I was "probably just a careful person" ..... Need to pluck up the courage to go back again soon about my depression/anxiety/ fertility issues. I often mean to write down everything I've been thinking/feeling in the build up so that when I get there I actually say what I mean to say! So maybe you could try that?

Or go private... they have to listen when you're paying! ;-)

Can still see shadows something. Fx for you x

Oh and good luck cookie! X

Good luck Cookie thinking of you, hope it all goes well and you can breathe a huge sigh of relief.

I feel the same about the doctor Mich. Definitely worth going if you have been in that much pain though. Don't let them fob you off and push for a referral if they're not forthcoming.

rpopz I think with mental health stuff it firmly depends on which doctor you see. Some of them are just useless and don't seem to accept that mental illness exists and some are excellent. If the last woman you saw was useless I would make an appointment with someone different as it can make such a difference to your treatment.

Well I was inspired by something's peeing marathon and PIAC. Have finally got my negative result (which is good, yet sad). So I just have to wait for the seemingly neverending bleeding to stop and then I can get the cape back on. I was thinking one with a massive make-up free selfie on the back? DP will never be able to resist .
Good luck with the app Cookie, have everything crossed for you xx

Good luck cookie, I hope it's all ok! thinking of you xxx

Christ, you can tell it's icing week here. I'm bloated to hell. Does anyone else get it? It's only started these last few months. I need some thanksgiving pants!

Glad you got the negative PIAC, wil but obviously sorry too. Take care of you.

mich hope the Dr goes well. I go so much I'm quite blase about it now, but used to hate it. Sometimes doctors like it if you tell them what you want them to do, sometimes they hate it. I have quite a jokey relationship with mine (she called me numpty last time I was in there!) so I often start with "Well, I was googling my symptoms" and she says "ok, tell me what you've got!" and we take it from there.

Hope the counselling is ok cookie.
xx

Back from counselling, the chance of the chromosomal problem we had in our first pregnancy reoccurring is less than 1%.

The baby getting the chromosomal issues I have is up to 10% but they are not sure as the data is 30 years old and they only tested 29 women.

Sending out good vibes for your bfp's!

Oops, obv meant the Dr comment for Mich!

That's great news Cookie

Haha, Juniper, I once had a GP ask me: "so, what do you think the problem is?" Couldn't figure out if I liked that or not!

cookie that sounds like good odds to me. I'm so happy for you x

Great news cookie

How do you feel Cookie? All sounds like good odds but I can imagine the lack of data may feel a bit unsatisfying?

So can everyone tell me how they know when they're ovulating, other than contraband devices, please? I have never looked out for it before and have just ended up randomly going for it after ERTD finishes. But now I don't know where I am in my cycle so would be good to know.

Wilh it is reassuring i just wish the odds were lower, hoping we get more accurate results on Monday.