You can do it by charting, analysing, testing, and worrying, but we prefer... JUST SHAGGING PART 20!!

[Nessalina]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce envy in other posters).

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

Icing = ovulating. Another autocorrect development!

Getting your Cape on = planning some serious pouncing on DH/DP

TWOT - Two Weeks of Torture!

The link to Part 19 is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1906908-Come-and-join-us-on-the-brand-new-rather-fabulous-and-very-slightly-notorious-or-so-wed-like-to-think-JUST-SHAGGING-PART-19" target="_blank">here</a>

The current Grads Fred is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1817751-Just-Shagging-Grads-Fred-8-Roll-up-roll-up-all-Viroids-welcome" target="_blank">here</a>

The rather nobbish article in which we became a little bit notorious is <a class="break-all" href="http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/health-news/the-dark-side-of-mumsnet-my-shocking-tour-of-the-websites-nether-regions-8905055.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">here</a> <img loading="lazy" class="inline-flex mumsnet-emoji" alt="Grin" src="https://www.mumsnet.com/build/assets/grin-D7Eg_B6y.png">

Happy shagging shaggers!

babynugget i find fertility friend a really good app...has a notes space and you can keep track of your symptom spotting too.

Currently driving myself crazy googling progesterone levels....

Thanks lil1ady I've downloadable fertility friend and a hundred other apps seems a bit glitchy with me but maybe not got the hang of it yet! Googling will drive you crazy too!

I think the best thing is to stick to one app babynugget. It will take time for them to pick up a pattern in your cycle. And spending your days trying to understand a hundred few different apps will drive you as mad as temping/charting, oh yes and googling! You said this was your first cycle trying, have you recently stopped birth control? That can play havock with your cycles for a few months. gave me a 7 week AF after 3 months being OFF it!!!

7 weeks! What a nightmare. No I stopped birth control about two years ago as at it turned me into a raving nutter! Since then my DP has just been 'jumping off the bus before his stop' IYKWIM !

That's it. I give up. I feel like I just have to accept I will never have a baby. I've been trying to find out about getting a HSG done privately as I can't get referred on NHS until October when we will have been trying for 2 years. 3 phone calls later I am still no further forward. I know DH wants this as much as I do but he is soooo cool and laid back about it. I just want to scream at the injustice of it all. And now I feel like a crazy person because I just went from "ok I'll google all this and deal with it" to "throwing my toys out of the pram" pun intended.

They say having kids drives you mad, I seem to have made it there before a single BFP ffs!

LilLady - don't lose heart, it's all so frustrating, I know, I've shuttled right down into the dumps today.

At least you got a "result" , I just got a text saying my results were "consistent with ovulation" so my hopes were shot through the roof! A very definite bfn this morning though, which has set me back, however I'm not even due on till the 27th so it's too early anyway, it's all just so up and down

lil

a friend of ours took 10 years to conceive - 7 years of trying then tests and 2 rounds of IVF.
Their daughter is utterly wonderful, smart and kind and I love her dearly.

I don't know if this helps or makes you feel worse - I'm only telling you about her because there is ALWAYS hope!

I know you won't actually give up and it must be so hard to deal with the frustration and waiting.
I know you will get motivated again despite all the sad and angry feelings.

And I'm really rooting for you. (All of you!)

"The night is darkest just before dawn"

Sorry I didn't get here sooner lil but I may have the answer if that helps... Assuming this is the 21day test (?) At the clinic yesterday I was told they look for levels over 30. Mine isn't so indicates not ovulating. But 40 is! And satisfactory doesn't sound like a good word but its medical, everything is 'satisfactory' or 'normal' never 'bloody fantastic!'.

Why do you have to wait two years to get more tests though? Sounds odd...

thanks guys. you are all a gal needs sometimes . feeling a little better. dh took me out for dinner and has been trying to cheer me up. I know I'm lucky that I don't have to hide all the crazy from him!

dulcet in my area they wont refer you to fertility clinic until you've been trying 2 years. we were lucky to get day21 bloods and sa! I think dr only agreed to it because if my recent stress and depressive episode with all the work stuff! what was your level? I've read so many conflicting things online. some say over 15 indicates ovulation, others say 35 is borderline! and then there's the ppl with levels at 60 and 90! are they repeating your blood tests? I got tested for rubella at the same time and that was "satisfactory" too. such a dumb word!

I was 26 but he said should be over 30. Could be lower I guess but still, not ideal! Google gives all different answers but I can tell you that's what the doc told me.

So odd how different health authorities work. A friend is going through similar stuff and they won't even check her DH before they do all get checks. Seems unfair to me!

Hullo - on the progesterone debate - I was 31 and they said that was fine and showed ovulation. I've read in lots of places that anything over 30 is fine.

Dulcet - you're right - I've heard of that before. It's so annoying when they won't even begin to think there might be something wrong with the male partner and do loads of invasive tests on the female first. Both partners should be tested at the same time. We were luckily. However, when we were having our results back and went to the hospital, DH said that he felt like he was an afterthought and at times felt he might as well not have been there (apart from to support me of course). It was so 1950s.

To make you feel better... Made me laugh...

jezebel.com/how-to-make-a-period-tracker-app-wed-actually-want-to-1507474084?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Not sure how to link on phone!

you need to use convert automatically.

or just put it in double square brackets ..

You have to put the link inside double square brackets - [[ - Dulcet. Funny though - imagine linking it to FB. 'Your friend Bearface has now joined you on your period'.

jezebel.com/how-to-make-a-period-tracker-app-wed-actually-want-to-1507474084?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow

Taa daa!

Yeah bear, we could all be sync up in no time. I defo think there should be treats unlocked as we get to ERTD!

omg that's hilarious! I think they should make an app that delivers when ertd arrives and when you record a bfn although that could be abused!

dulcet 26 is pretty close. was your test done at the right time, i.e 7days before AF? I read the prog tales off after 7dpo so just thinking if timing slightly off may be nothing to worry about check out the crazy mood swing lady suddenly having PMA! why is it easier to cheer you lot on than mysf? lol

Just checking in with you all, glad to see the PMA is keeping up. We'll I'm officially JSed out - we managed 9' count em NINE consecutive days of JSing, until we were well and truly knackered. Last nights effort was a farce, my EWCM had long left the building so let's just say it wasn't a hospitable place, but we persevered regardless. DP is getting a well earned rest tonight.

If this months efforts don't work, I'm declaring myself barren.

What do you ladies do re alcohol during TWOTING? I've had a couple of beers tonight, but my heart wasn't in it. I just think if we've gone to so much effort to try, then it would be a shame to mess it up by indulging in alcohol... I dunno, who knows eh.

Hope you're all keeping positive, happy weekend viroids

I take my hat off to ye Queen Cosy, Queen of the Shaggers! Nine times! Wow!

I still tend to drink during the TWOT. However, I'm not a big drinker anyway so I don't have more than a couple of glasses of wine. I think it's fine as long as you arr getting smashed. You don't share your blood supply with baby until a few weeks in anyway.

Arr = aren't (cripes!)

Yeah same as bear really - not a drinker. If there's a special occasion in the TWW then I will but other than that I don't anyway.

morning shaggers. cosy 9 consecutive days! omg! (picking jaw up off floor) if you don't get a bfp this month the planets must be misaligned or something!

as for drinking I went tea total when we were first ttc. now if I have an "event" where drink is involved I drink anyway. eg the night I was a lil bit merry and messaged you lot on here. that was a bottle and a half of wine! like bear and dulcet I rarely drink so these sorts of things are one offs, I also read baby doesn't share your blood supply for at least first 5 weeks and I'm pretty healthy so I figure my liver should be able to sort it all out OK on these odd occasions. I guess I decided I couldn't keep putting my life on hold for a baby I wasn't conceiving each month. I was hoping being more laid back about it would help but so far no such luck. hmmm maybe I should drink more and go and sign on for job seekers!

I wouldn't recommend the nine day marathon (unless it works, I'll let you know in two weeks) it pretty much killed any desire, made us feel like shag robots, and knackered us out! If this months efforts didn't work, I'm going to try EOD next I think.

Re drinking, don't get me wrong I'm not a drinker either, 2 is usually my maximum on a special night out, but was just worried that if pineapple can make a difference, then maybe alcohol can too... In a negative way.

Ah too late mow, just got go get through the TWOT . I've already set myself up for a fall, getting my hopes up that this might be our month. Going back to holiday planning to tempt the law of sod!

where did you read about the pineapple flesh cosy everything I've read says to eat the whole thing but not to eat any after 5dpo.

holiday planning definitely a good idea. 14 weeks and counting until mine. we were looking at stuff we can do whole we are there last night. so far we are visiting a rock

Hi girls im new!

c3 for me now... miscarried in november 2013, we werent trying though was a total shock/surprise. Since happened first cycle was december AF sadly arrived last sunday.... Finially gave its self up and finished Yesterday, so i following this smep.... My eight day today, so dh better get his ass home from work so dtd lol! I have some ovulation tests never used them before!! So new to all this, i didnt have to try before now i am it's bloody hard and stressful!!

Anyways thats my story :) i have read a lot of the comments but not the full 400 odds i'd be here all day hehe