TTC and still Breastfeeding? You are not alone - come to our bf-friendly cafe for a chat and some cake!

[MisterSafetyCatchIsNotOn]

Over here all breastfeeding ttcers! Welcome to our thread - a place for us to come for support, information and to talk about the extra challenges of ttc while still breastfeeding (or expressing like myself).

I thought I should go ahead and start the new thread as the old one is about to fill up and I didn't want anyone to get lost (hope that's ok Waiting and that you haven't already done this and I just missed it!)

For anyone who is new to the thread or needs a reminder, here are a few links to some useful websites (thanks Waiting for putting these together)

kellymom.com/bf/normal/ttc-while-bf/

kellymom.com/bf/normal/fertility/

www.llli.org/nb/nbmayjune04p114.html

www.fertilityfriend.com/Faqs/Fertility-charting-while-breastfeeding.html

argh stupid phone. Losing messages. Just wanted to check in to say just about holding it together here. Still no symptoms which is baffling me. Convinced its the bf. Hope everyone's having a good weekend. Going to continue to loiter here if that's ok. Want to see some peeps bfps which i know are just around the corner. Also haven't found anywhere as nice as this to hang out.

Loiter away mrs

Painty I'm glad you're feeling better and hope you had a good weekend and some sunshine?

Woohoo June, glad you had some reassuring dark lines and all the best for your pregnancy, do check in whenever you like.

Good to hear it's all going well weebairn, you have inspired lots of renewed efforts around here!

Any sign of AF yet Orchid? Or have you tested again?

Hi Tristan, come in and join us, there have been lots of BFPs around here recently! I think for bf-ing on demand as it sounds like you are doing about 14 months is average for periods to return (that's when my AF came back) but obviously some people get it much earlier and some later. Also, I think I mentioned a while back about a friend who is still bf-ing her dd (nearly 1) and discovered recently that she was 4 months pregnant, so it can happen without any AF at all! Have you had any signs of imminent AF like cramps or increased cm? Spacing out feeds can be quite effective at kick-starting things I think (mine came back shortly after my return to work) if you want to speed things up, but obviously that is harder for you/ your ds and it's likely things will start up again in the next few months anyway. I have the same problem with temps (ds doesn't wake up every 2 hours any more thankfully but is often up at 5am for milk and then I don't have a 3 hour stretch to sleep before morning) so my charts are a bit erratic at times, but you can still see the sharp increase after ovulation quite clearly.

I'm on cd 19 and no ov yet, but the EWCM has started so it will probably be in the next week or so and this month DH is not going away, so fingers crossed!

Hello All,

Have been lurking over the past couple of days but just wanted to ask a question if I may following on from Mister How much were you all feeding when AF returned?

DS is now 22 and a half months and I have been actively trying to space out feeds. I night weaned him about a week to ten days ago and the last two days he has gone to bed without a last bedtime feed. He doesn't often feed in the day so we are now down to just a morning feed on some days. (It hasn't been so today as he is full of cold so ended up with a bedtime feed too). Surely it can't be much longer until my fertility returns?!

I don't feel at all pre-menstral and did a pregnancy test this morning in case we has managed to catch the first egg. It was negative :(

Any hints, tips or anecdotes gladly received!

Sorry meant to also say: I am 33, periods were very regular before and we co-sleep. DS is also my second. I got AF back last time when I stopped feeding at 19 months, but always wondered if I could have waited a bit longer, fed a bit more etc. I've tried to take a more relaxed approach this time, but I'm finding it hard! I'm beginning to think I might give it until he is 2yrs and then stop if nothing has happened by then.

Hi MissDee,
Up until about 12 months my ds fed 4 or 5 times in the day then often twice during the night. Then I went back to work part time so he suddenly had a 10+ hour gap twice a week and dropped to 3 daytime feeds on the other days (still twice overnight). AF returned 1.5 months later but was not regular until he had a feeding strike at 17 months and I moved to just expressing twice a day (now once). I think it might have partly been the sudden decrease that made the difference rather than how many x per day if that makes sense.
Plenty of people get AF back on a regular cycle while still feeding multiple times a day though. Also, I didn't have much warning of AF returning (or just didn't notice!) it just arrived one day out of the blue. If you've only just cut down on the night feeds it might just take a month or so for your body to sort itself out.

Thanks Mister, that's really interesting. I know I should just wait is out but I am not very good at being patient :). I have only fed once in the last 24 hours now so fingers crossed I am able to keep it to that (i.e. not creep back up to feeding more) and that that is enough to make a difference.

I ended up using chocolate as a distraction yesterday afternoon and unsurprisingly it worked very well!

I'll keep you posted!

Hi miss-DD was 25 months when AF returned and it was completely out of the blue-no warning! At this point I was working 4 days a week but still feeding on demand the rest of the time-and my DD liked her night time milk (she still does and 6 weeks pregnant!).

Hope this is useful.

Hi, can I join in please? I have a 13mo dd who is breastfed twice a day. My periods came back just before she turned one and we're now ttc number 2. It took us a year and a lot of effort (charting) to conceive baby number 1 and I'm hoping this time will be a little quicker. It feels as though the pressure is off as we already have our amazing daughter, and know it's possible to fall pregnant, but my sil is 12 weeks pregnant with her second and I'm jealous!

happy mothers day everyone! Hope you are all spoilt rotten and have a lovely day. My dreams of a lie in have remained just that. . . a dream! We've the in laws coming round later so busy day here. Sat nursing my coffee watching different cartoons to usual because of the clocks.
Hello newtothenet! Welcome! Lots of lovely ladies here. The links at the beginning of the thread kindly posted by mister are a great place to start for lots of info on ttc whilst bf.

Hello everyone, it's gone rather quiet around here, hope you're all doing ok!

Welcome newto and good luck! I have definitely been more relaxed this time around although so far we haven't got anywhere (7 months in and counting...) but it is nice not to feel stressed about it most of the time. I definitely get those pangs of jealousy though, have several friends who have kids the same age as my ds who are now pregnant with number 2. Although I love talking to them about their pregnancies I can't stop my head going 'I wish that was meeeee' every time, I just come on here or bother DH to keep it in check.

Happy (belated) mothers day to you too mrs, shame about your lie-in! I missed mine too but that is because I was out on Saturday night and stayed with a friend so had to get up early to get myself home, guess I can't really complain!

Any other news? How are you Painty?
I'm having a very odd cycle, have been spotting for the last 4 days but my temperature chart doesn't indicate any ovulation yet. According to my recent cycles I should ovulate today or tomorrow but I'm not really feeling it, so we'll see but I suspect this is not going to be our month.

Hullo all! May I join please? I am about to turn 41 (will prob drop by the fabulous forties thread too) and have a ds who has just turned one. My periods have not returned but last night my mucus seemed fertile and cervix high and soft so we dtd! Tho today cervix felt closed again so wondering if I imagined it all. Ah well. I have a question though. Sex is still really painful. I feel like my ladybits have been sandpapered. I had to put anaesthetic cream on several times in the night after dtd. Has anyone else had this? It would have been too painful to have sex today whic is obviously going to impact on conception success!

Hey ho. Just started bleeding. Thought it was too good to be true! Plan to have an irresponsible glass of wine (it's my birthday) and see what the morning brings.

Oh mrs bleeding early on is really really common though, fingers crossed it's nothing. Happy Birthday! Enjoy your glass of wine, try not to worry and I really hope things will look better tomorrow.

Hi Nosleep, sounds like you might not have long to wait for AF and no harm in dtd just in case! Although that does sound a bit ouch, I had pain like that the first few times we had sex after DS was born but not after the first couple of months, it soon settled once we were doing it more regularly again. I did have a fairly easy birth though- did you have a big baby / lots of stitches? Have you tried using lubricant (one of the ttc friendly ones like pre-seed)? TTC is going to be tricky, not to mention unpleasant if you have that much pain every time.

Sorry to hear that mrs-fingers crossed for you.

Nosleep-welcome. Dtd was really painful for me for a long time after dd (at least 2 years). I had a difficult birth with forceps/episiotomy-then had to have granulation tissue removed after about 8 months... But it did get better as we Dtd more regularly and would say it almost feels normal now.

Thanks everyone. I actually had a cs so I'm majorly annoyed to have sex problems! Maybe we just need to keep going. We do use a lube but it still hurts. It has got a bit better. It used to feel like he was bashing my cervix but that has gone now.

Thank you Painty, mister and June. Things have settled at the moment. Booked in at early pregnancy unit on Monday morning for a scan to see what's what. Just trying to keep busy till then. And also not blame bfing. So glad i haven't weaned yet. Means everything to me. And feeling lucky for everything i have.
Hope everyone is having a good weekend. We met friends for cake at a local country park today. Managed to dodge showers and get some much needed fresh air.

Mrs, will be thinking of you on Monday [hugs].

Sorry you've been having such tough time Painty and I hope all your family are ok/recovering. How scary for your pregnant friend, good to hear things are looking up and I'm sure she is very glad to have you there to support her! Make sure you look after yourself too though. I don't think I have ovulated yet, spotting stopped 2 days ago and I've had a bit of EWCM over the last day or so maybe I will soon, or it might be an anovulatory cycle which would be very frustrating!

Thank you for thinking of me Painty and Mister. This stuff is so tough when no one in RL knows what is going on. And it's really not the week to come out for some close family support because of a family wedding next weekend! Timing!!

Well, after convincing ourselves of the worse because I think that was the only energy we could offer the situation due to other RL stuff atm we were seen by a lovely lady at the EPU and she showed us our 8mm bean with strong heartbeat. Unexplained bleed. Everything was in the right place. Measured a tiny bit small for my dates, but sonographer was sure this is just down to margins of error measuring something so tiny. All good for now. Feeling happy, but dazed. Also quite nauseous yesterday and today which I am (sadly) hoping is the start of morning all day sickness because it will give me something else to focus on.

Got my fingers crossed for you Painty and Mister that this will be your month. I still smile everything I read 'the weebairn method'!!

all round!!