TTC 10+++ months part 18

[Mrsden]

This is the BFP thread.

Evening lovelies!

So sorry about the inconclusive scan, cos. It's so hard, hanging between hope and fear! Handhold til next week.

Thanks for making the delivery sound both hilarious and painful, arte! Still in denial here too, euro, so you've got a while :)

I am glad work have been supportive, critter! Please take your time to heal in all ways. James' twiblings deserve that. How is mrC?

Sorry for the down feeling, fox. I'll fluff behind your ears, as the tail is looking good already. I agree you're an uplifter, but if you need a gentle push yourself we're here!

Glad you've emerged from the fog, devon!

Loving all the books and making notes. I haven't read since Christmas. Too little time! Waves at all of you!!

Cos - You obviously can get pg and progesterone is one thing that seems to help. Would you consider adding immune treatment/programme on top? Still squeezing your hand tightly.

Critters - So glad to hear your work has been supportive. Love your handicraft for the twiblings. When does sister Critters arrive?

Euro - I think you mentioned central america. Not strictly there but if you fancy the look of Tulum in Mexico I know it well. It's a really lovely place. Hope the work trip is going well.

Devon - I am so glad the sad fog has lifted. You sound like you are in a good place. I am really hopeful it will be 3rd time lucky for you.

Ten - How is it going on the pill. No nasty side effects I hope.

Fox - Still thinking of you. Did you have some reflexology? I remember you said something about starting that again. I always found a good session to be really helpful.

Ray - Hope you and MrD has recovered from the cold.

Nelly - a trip sounds like a nice break to get away from it all.

Thinking of you, Barry and mini bee today, buzz.

Cos, hang in there. A few days can make all the difference this early on and you can't be certain when conception took place. The uncertainty is so cruel though, I wish it could be straightforward for you.

Euro, I don't think it's possible for a ten plussers to be insensitive. Hang out here for as long as you like, there's always space for grads. And we need your wise words and knowledge too!

Critter, that bright star was out again this morning, I make a wish on it every time I see it. My wish today involved the words twibbling and critter.
I'm glad work are being understanding, don't rush back before you're ready, physically and emotionally. Although sometimes routine helps and makes the days go quicker but you don't want added stress in your life just now.

Devon, I'm sorry you've had a gloomy time recently. It's a miserable place to be. I bet you don't have to wait as long as you think for the HHS round, it seems like they overestimate times to manage expectations. I saw the news about the newsreader. I have to say I'm always a bit suspicious when people in their forties claim surprise, miracle pregancies. She might have used donor eggs, or perhaps frosties from previous ivf rounds. I was put off her because she tweeted a scan photo, and one of those ugly 3d or 4d or whatever they are.

Sea, how are you feeling now?

I've had 15 vials of blood taken this morning, I don't even know what they're testing for really. I've just gone with it. I saw all the blood clotting factors on the list, homocysteine, chlamydia and various other infections. Of course I'm worrying now that they'll find something wrong, when you test that many things there's bound to be something. I only have to pay 30€ though, insurance covers the rest so I was happy about that. Af turned up yesterday, 5 days late and it's a clotty, strange one so I'm wondering if maybe something did happen?

Critter I remember dolls cowboy round as well, it stuck with me because she posted that no one had asked her name before they were transferring the embies! Please take as much time off as you need and don’t try to rush back to work, although I appreciate that different people deal with things in different ways.

Cos prog may not be your only issue, but you don’t know for sure yet that this isn’t going to stick. Not sure if this is helpful or not but a friend of mine had three get to 8 weeks or so before failing, she now has a couple of children, it was just a numbers game.

Buzz good luck for today, wishing a sneeze birth for you!

Devon HA I am glad I am not the only one suffering (however briefly) from the green eyed monster! Must remember someone else having a baby doesn’t mean there is one less to go around!!! I second what Ray says about the NHS round, we would have waited for ours if we had known how quickly it would arrive, as it was we actually had to delay our NHS round as we were still in the middle of our round at Create when the appointment came up (we were told two years or something bonkers and it was about 6 months).

Euro consider Turks and Caicos if you are looking at the Caribbean. Parrot Cay and the Grace Bay club both beautiful hotels. MrT who isn’t that bothered by beach holidays enjoyed this trip (although I think he enjoyed the Miami part of it more!).

Sea How are you feeling? Is the OHSS subsiding yet? No side effects from the pill, I was always fine with taking it before, my only issue is remembering to take it! I am terrible at remembering to take any sort of tablets including folic acid etc.

Ray 15 VIALS? Sorry I cant remember where you are with treatment, is this a precursor to another round?

Hello to Fox and Lemon and everyone else!

I've had two rounds of ivf, 4 embryos transferred and no pregnancy so doctor thought it was time to test me for everything known under the sun to cause infertility or miscarriage before I have the frozen transfer.

Did anyone see the story about taking vitamins and link to miscarriage? It was a daily fail so trying to see of I can find another link.

and ten as a bonus, despite fears about raising a future member of Hezbollah, Tiny Doll (if appearances are to be believed) seems to a blood relative of mine.

cos hang in there lovely.

Ray sounds like a sensible plan, sometimes I wonder whether there is something wrong with me. I have never had any tests done (no lap and dye etc) because they had the sample from MrT and decided IVF it was! Hopefully if there is anything it will all be quickly resolvable.

I saw the article, haven't researched it though. Will be interested to see whether you find anything else on it either way.

Morning all!

Ray 15 vials of blood?!? They must have tested everything under the sun. Although I do remember getting about 6 drawn for what they called the standard IVF-screening before starting treatment. I think that was nasty infections, blood clotting, all sorts of bodily functions. I really hope this will make the difference. But with day 2 embies transferred (and no idea about the quality) I think only 4 is still very little. I am holding out lots of hope for your FET.

Odd that they didn't check you a little more ten. I might ask about it.

Keeping stuff crossed for cosbean!

How are you today critter? I have been crocheting a bit again, and was thinking of you knitting for the twibling.

Hurrah for tiny doll not being a future member of Hezbollah although I reckon nurture has something to do with that as well.

Sorry about the brief emergence of the green monster devon and ray. I totally sympathise I got a pang of jealousy when I saw some diffed presenter on telly the other day, conveniently forgetting that I am now one of those people myself. I think it is a normal and natural response, however unpleasant.

doll that must be good. I think I will be frantically looking for a famaily resemblance if I ever get a win. I just hope the poor unfortunate doesn't end up with mr euro's chin (large) and my nose (large and funny looking). The other way around would work out so much better!

Thanks for the holiday recommendations. I've been to Tulum, back before it was developed, and loved it. I'm not sure I could face going back now there would be Other People there. T&Cs might be an idea. A former colleague of mine actually lives there. It looks idyllic.

ray 15 vials! You must be empty after that!

cos how are you doing?

buzz best of luck!

Sorry for the less than full name check - I just hopped on quickly between meetings. There is sun here - actual sun! I can feel it on my back and it is wonderful. I'll try to pop back later. Hugs to all. x

Actually euro apart from being reassuring re Cowboy IVF I'm rather thrown off by it. I was rather expecting/hoping for a Tiny Ken. His appearance gives me The Fear that he will be like me in other scary ways even though rationally I know it doesn't work like that. I guess also I start from my own normal of adoption; I believe I wrote on here before that I found I really celebrated the difference of Little Doll. I would add now, without wanted to make it sound like a problem, as it's not, that I bonded easier with Little Doll than with Tiny Doll. I guess just to say, it's not all biology at all that. Lemon I hear you!

Anyway enough of the Doll House. Loves all round.

Oh cos I'm sorry things still aren't conclusive for you. I am however quietly hopeful. Is there any chance the bleed and clots might have been a twin? I so so hope this works out for you.

Hello lovely doll! Ginster is the spit of mr gin, which puts an end to his maybe they used someone else's sperms and that's why it worked but maybe they used someone else's eggs. I love hearing about mini doll and it makes me seriously think about adoption, if we decide we want another.

euro and art even after I pushed out ginster I still was in shock that there was actually a baby lying on my belly! I still sometimes don't believe it all worked and we have our own baby. Hope you are feeling ok euro.

ray 15 vials?! Hope you felt ok after that. I agree with what lemons says. I don't see how they could have known enough about quality of those 4 embies to be able to say them not implanting is indicative of a problem with you. I took comfort in the stat that the norm is 3 fresh cycles, plus fets. However, it's good that they're throwing everything at this cycle.

devon I have some friends doing NHS ivf and they cycled really quickly after the initial appointment. They were told there's not much take up for the NHS cycles.. So hopefully yours will be here before you know it.

Hope sea is doing ok and the ohss has eased.

ten st Hellier's is our pct hospital but our one doesn't fund any ivf. Mr gin had all his tests there. The place looks like some 19th century mad house, but the consultant was v good and nice.

fox sorry to hear about the sadness. I wish I could do something to help. I too always think of you when watching cuntryfile.

critter lovely, you are still v much in my thoughts. I was so sad to read of the painful reminder of your milk coming in. Lots of love x

Waves to lemons and buzz, who is hopefully pushing out mini bee right now.

Gin So that is you me an Buzzy who have been there, small internet world!

Doll It is interesting to hear you talk about adoption, it is something I consider occasionally but have put in the too hard box for now. I think me and MrT are open to it, but he especially would like to try for biological children first. I am less driven by a need to have a baby that is ‘mine’, I would just like to have a family, and I will have to wait and see how that might arrive.

Euro T&C is idyllic, do it. I will be horribly jealous, it was one of our best trips actually.

lemons you are probably right, I should ask someone, I’ll mention it when I go in on the 11th Feb, I am not sure they’ll do anything about it but it cant hurt to ask hey.

Critter - I hope you are ok. Are you and mrC going to try and get away for a bit?

Cos- are you ok ??

Doll - fascinating that you bonded with with little doll easier than tiny. Out of interest had you always wanted to adopt or did you go down the route as a result of TTC probs?

Ray - 15 vials sounds like the Chicago tests to me and maybe a few more thrown in for good measure. We're they having to squeeze your arm to try and drain the blood?!

Buzz - is everything ok?

Euro/ sea - hope you are both ok.

As part of my nhs cycle I have had to get some bloods and scan done on certain day. I find it slightly concerning that every appointment I have to repeat my history, it's as if everyone is typing up notes on their own computer and not on to my file. No one ever seems to have a history. The consultant I just saw was nice. When I told him about my amh result in the summer of '12 he said that the amh people were suspended at that time because they were getting things wrong. He also said it is very inaccurate test. Interesting considering he is nhs.
Scan showed a cluster of cysts on my tube , don't know where that has appeared from. Hopefully it's not too problematic though. Anyway nice doc just said keep persevering.

Has anyone watched the tv series Revenge? Really into it!

Fox, I also want to fluff your tail. You've had such a tough time but you're amazingly strong and I really do think you're going to get there. Fox cubs are so cute.

Devon, that's interesting about amh. I don't think much of it either, there's loads of people with a low amh who do well with ivf and vice versa. Could the consultant give you any idea of what your problem might be? Or what protocol you'll do? I don't know if it's the Chicago tests, the dr just said it was full immunes plus some other stuff.

Ray - no he had no idea. Like his colleague last month, he was very surprised that we didn't have anything to freeze considering our fertilisation rate is ok. My actual ivf appointment isn't for another 2 months or so, so perhaps may find out more then.
When do your results come in?

I have a telephone consultation with my doctor on the 10th to discuss the results.

Morning lovelies, thinking of you all!

The AMH thing is intriguing devon and I am really hopeful that another good stab at it (and slightly less excessively strict rules on freezing) gives you that other chance (or two/three) you need for a miniloch.

Fingers crossed for good results on the 10th, ray. Although something easily treatable might be helpful. But I am still on the idea that you haven't had enough of a chance.

Thinking of you all, especially critter. I hope you're spending healing time with mrC.

I seem to have gathered that buzz has laid. CONGRATULATIONS!!

Tails fluffed, ears scratched and extra treats shared out, I am off to do some work!

Ray - 15 vials def sound like it's chicago tests plus other things thrown in for good measure. I think it's excellent that your docs are testing everything and leaving no stone unturned. I would feel v reassured by that. Hope you didn't feel too dizzy from the blood letting.

Devon - I am glad you had a good convo with the consultant. How interesting about AMH! I had mine done there in 2012 too. I personally think Argy's freezing rules are way too strict. I read quite a lot about this when I was cycling and my understanding is many clinics freeze much earlier as there is evidence to suggest that embies that don't do well in a test tube could actually do well and implant when put back. Argy have a different view. They like to take everything to blasto stage if at all possible and if they are not excellent they don't bother freezing. But there is so much evidence to suggest that even if it's not an excellent blasto it could have implanted and end up a perfect baby. Anyway, my guess is you will have something to freeze this round - not that you will need it as this next one is your round - I feel it in my bones.

Ten - I think it is worth asking for other tests. I think the nhs approach is to use ivf if they know there is a problem that requires it. If they have identified an issue they kind of just focus on that and think well ivf is the answer anyway. No harm in asking!

Euro - I went to Tulum 6 years ago. It was lovely. A hols sound great.

A bit anxious in the sea household. MrS has been made redundant. . He is getting a good payoff and is already pretty advance in conversation on other job opps. Nonetheless it's v nerve racking without another offer in place - talk about bad timing just as I manage to get a BFP. I have also now been offered a position to work in a role I have always dreamt of - career change stuff. Timing again. Not really sure what to do. I hope it's okay to share this on the thread. Have been talking to you ladies for so long and I really value your advice. I know how fortunate I have been to get my BFP on my first ivf. Truth be told I feel a bit guilty. It doesn't feel v real at all and all the non TTC stuff all seems quite overwhelming at the moment. I am sure my hormones are helping me think clearly either.

I am sure my hormones aren't helping me think clearly either.

sea I am so sorry about MrS. Talk about terrible timing, that sucks. I know I said it before, but you have nothing to feel guilty about. We are all just thrilled that you've got your long awaited BFP, you've been so patient and waited so long for this round through so many frustrating hold ups. And then you got OHSS! This has been in no way a walk in the park.

On the job front - I suppose it depends on the opportunity, but you still have several months before mini-sea arrives. So if it's genuinely something you'd love, why not?

ray 15 vials! Good lord. I hope you had a sweet cup of tea and a cake after that to stop from fainting. Great that they are testing you thoroughly though. And it seems like you're getting good care from the consultant and being properly listened to and checked out.

buzzy congratulations sweetheart! Can't wait to hear about mini-bee. Hope the birth was easy and that you're snuggled up in the oxytocin glow of love right now. Big big hug.

cos I'm thinking of you and squeezing your paw. You are so close now.

I have put a picture of James on my profile - I will probably just keep it there for a couple of weeks and then take it down, but wanted to show you guys my little chap. I am doing ok here. I finished my first twirling hat, which looks like http://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/aviatrix-hat (hope the link works). Thinking of leaving the house today for a walk around the block.

Critters - Thanks for your kind words. You are such a beautiful soul. You will be an amazing mum again. I just know it. You must miss James so much. Lots of love to you lovely. Has sister Critters arrived yet? I think a walk around the block for some fresh air sounds like a great idea.

I would love to see a picture of James. I am not actually connected to anyone. Will PM you my real name and if you are okay to add me - I would love to see him.

That's a gorgeous hat. what colour did you knit? I have always wanted to learn to knit but never know where to start. I guess something easy and following a youtube video is probably the best way.

Sea - the photo should be public if you click on my username, I hope I've done it right.

YouTube is amazing for teaching knitting skills. I think some shops do classes too. It's been the perfect therapeutic blend of requiring concentration but also not requiring much thought. I made the hat in a sort of camel colour.

Sister critter arrives tomorrow for a long weekend. I can't wait to see her.

When is your six week scan? It must be next week?

Critters - He's just so beautiful. He looks peaceful. I am shedding a tear for James. I am just devastated he was taken from you and MrC. It's so so wrong. Thank you so much for sharing. He is etched into my memory and will always be remembered.

I'm so happy Sister Critters will be coming soon. Being with close loving family is what you need right now.

I am doing an early scan tomorrow. A little before 6 weeks.

sea that is terrible timing. I hope mr s finds something quickly. As for your opportunity, I'd be tempted to explore it for a while and see if you really want it, and if you do you're not obliged to, but I think I would have a frank conversation with them about your situation and your future. That's my plan anyway, with an opportunity I am looking at atm.

I hope the early scan goes well. Don't be alarmed if you can't see too much. It really is very early.

critter I hope you have a lovely time with sister c and that she is a great support to you. James looks so beautiful. I echo sea's words - I cannot believe that he has been taken from you.

Hugs and tail feather fluffs to all. Sorry for the inadequate catch up. I have been reading on my travels though. I fly home tomorrow and have my quickie scan and harmony test on Monday. My symtoms have lessened in the past few days, so I am inevitably menkulling again. Roll on Monday.

What a beautiful boy, critter. Thank you for sharing the photo with us, so precious.