TTC 10+++ months part 18

[Mrsden]

This is the BFP thread.

Hi ladies! Wow really busy here on fred at the mo. Will try to catch up with everyone but bound to forget something/someone.

Cos - I am sorry the evil digis are playing with you. Like others have said the week indication is probably inaccurate. It's still showing positives which I think is a really good sign. I think a scan at the EPU is a really good idea and I hope it will help put your mind at rest. I don't know how you have managed to stay so calm through all this. A tight squeeze to you. Really keeping my toes and fingers crossed that the bean is developing nicely. You deserve this so damn much!

Critters - How are you doing? I hope the cabbage helps. I hope your family and friends are looking after you. How is MrC doing?

Ten - I guess a different process is bound to be unnerving but as you can see there are plenty of nhs successes too. Fingers tightly crossed this is the one. The Argy seem to be do beta testing everyday for 2 weeks after a BFP. I have only had 1 day off this week and have been told it will be daily bloods until the week 6 scan - they adjust progesterone dosage based on the results and also immunes as well.

If you do decide to cycle there I think it's worth thinking about the amount of time you have to take off. week 2 of stimms I think it's pretty impossible to go back to work as you are expected to have bloods in the afternoon as well. And of course if you get a BFP there you pretty much have to go there again for 2 weeks every day after. If you work close by it could be do-able though. I have come to think of the guys who take my blood as vampires. I am amaze I have that much blood in me to be taken tbh.

Pout - Thanks for the congratulations. It doesn't feel real to tbh and I am trying not to think about it too much (not doing well on this). How are you doing? Have you thought more about appealing? I am still angry they put you through an appt and then mess you about. Grrrr

Euro - Glad flu/cold is getting a little better. Just dream of your hot weather hols and I am sure it will all help the cold go away. So glad you have biz trip to help will away the time until 12 weeks.

Devon - I am sorry you have to do more waiting but it may be less than you think. They certainly told me it would be longer than it actually was when I was on the waitlist there. You will have to put Roy in a cold bath soon to get him ready for the cycle.

Fox - How are you?

Mad - It's nice to have a surprise. There are too few of those in life as it is.

I wanted to share a story I came across recently - not sure if it's helpful or not. I spent a couple of hours this week with a lady who had 2 failed rounds at the Argy. She is 40 and has low AMH/high FSH and poor reserve and was given a pretty poor prognosis by the docs. Anyway, long story short is she just got a natural BFP and she is absolutely convinced it's because she put herself on DHEA. She is actually a doctor herself and she did a huge amount of research into this. The Argy told her not to take it but she went against their advice and persuaded her GP to monitor her while she was taking the DHEA - she did say it's not something one should take willy nilly as too much is actually bad for fertility. Anyway, the main thing is she is pregnant after being told the outlook is pretty bleak. She did say there are different types of DHEA and the ones she got and believe to be the best ones had to come from the US. I thought this was worth sharing as a) she got a BFP and b) she is actually a medical doctor herself. Like I said, not sure if it's helpful or not but worth investigating maybe if low reserves/amh has been diagnosed as an issue.

Buzzy feels like an old school mental asylum from a movie...... Especially the bit round the back of it where they send the non fertiles, loads of empty rooms and peeling paint.

Ten, I too had a big standard lp, one blood test while stimming, one to test. Of course the first was only a cp, but the second one is still going strong!

A visit to EPU sounds like the way forward, cos. Sory about the digi fuelled men killing.

I echo what euro said, critter! In awe at your strength and positivity. But we're here for you if you need to off load less pretty emotions. Huge squeeze!

Waves and pets to you all. Shall we each come up with something not ttc related to tell/say? We're looking at a nice big, really (too) expensive flat tomorrow. Quite excited! And I am not doing any work til Monday morning :) I have been doing stupid amounts recently!

Big=bog standard, obviously! And stupid phone double posting. Apols!

Keep breathing buzz, I am sure Kayla will never forgive you! But she prefers Barry anyway!

Not going to be able to do a proper catch up, but love and very gentle hugs to Critter, so I don't displace the cabbage. It's very grim and you are being awesome, but I echo what Euro said. If you need a rant, that's what we are here for.

Cos squeezes for you too. A scan is a good idea I think. Assuming all is well it would be good to have a chance to enjoy these early weeks.

Mad 24 weeks, holy cow! Are you feeling well. Gosh I still shudder when I think about how you were facing a potential hysterectomy. Do they expect the pregnancy will improve the endo (hope I'm remembering that right).

Devon great news on the NHS round. Maybe a simpler regime is the answer.

Ten, my clinic were less attentive than I would like despite being private, and also despite my obvious need in my case, I don't think I got any tailored care. Or indeed pregnant. .

Pout I am fist shaking on your behalf. Maybe we could all storm the pct and make them change their minds??

Someone was asking about DE. I don't think we will be doing the overseas clinic that is associated with ours. It's very very expensive. Serum is top of our very short list just now, because we've never been to Athens. Is that a suitable reason? We might go on the Uk wait list too though. I just want to get this out of the way though as I'm fed up with it hanging over me and have already started dreaming about new hobbles. .

Lemon. Non TTC you say? Well we found out today the ILs have booked a very fancy hotel for us all for their anniversary. Several months away yet but it's so far the only holiday on our horizon this year. I'm fairly certain that will change though! It's incredibly generous of them and should be a lovely treat.

Talking of which, Euro I am familiar with the area of which you speak. We can chat on the other place if you want. Costa Rica is awesome and would be a good place to think about.

Waves to Fox, Ten, and everyone else. Tea just been put down in front of me so gotta go x

Mad wow, that's so great, and its been quite a straightforward 24 weeks for you has it? And lol about keeping the bush tidy but no visiting strangers.

Lovely Critter, I think the rest of us have been going through a pretty big range of emotions on your behalf this week so I can't imagine how it's been for you. Please do offload if it would help.

Pout what's your plan do you think now? How are you feeling now since your appointment?

Dev the consultant who's given me the meds is bit mr s no, it's a south coast one. That appt will come round quick but that seems a bit of a wait. I still think a change of approach could surprise you. Will you use the meantime to maybe try prog or something? I totally sympathise with the sperm boiling / alcohol poisoning - it's hard enough keeping track of your own shoulds / shouldn'ts and drives me to distraction to have to keep an eye on DH too.

Euro glad you're feeling a little better.

Buzzy good luck with it all, will be thinking of you.

Sea that's an interesting story about that lady.

Nelly that plan sounds like a good one, I've hear such good things about serum.

Ten the clinic doesn't sound too inviting but hope it goes well anyway.

Thanks all for the hand holding. As for non-ttc we've got loads of work shenanigans going on where I am. How would you describe your work personality / style? I'm of the never really get too riled / annoyed by things, happy to plod along doing my best and fitting in with everyone else, no fireworks style. I just can't get the people who sit around moaning and bitching all day long, and they sure are mutiplying where I am! Sorry lemons that was no where near as exciting as your flat viewing! Whereabouts are you looking?

Ok on the non ttc front: best 3 books you ever read?

nelly I did the crazy menstrual blood testing through Serum and they were amazingly responsive - far better than any UK clinic I have dealt with. I've heard good things from people who have actually cycled there too.

Thanks - will drop you a line, re: hols.

cos I have a similar work style. I work with a lot of stressy types. I consider I balance it out.

nelly I have heard good things about Serum

Buzzy how did you work all the tests etc? The HIV and things? Mine will probably need redone (and that reminds me, my smear reminder came in). Did you have them done in a private clinic here?From what I can tell from my very brief search, serum suggest 2 visits.

Sea I am thinking of DHEA. I don't think my long term fertility is worth worrying about now!! Not sure how to ask my GP about it though. Thanks for the story.

Cos damn you and your books. I lay awake for ages thinking about it. I was mainly coming up with books I read as a child/young teen but realised I struggle to recall books I read later in life, which is odd. I don't think I could pick best 3 ever. I loved so many pony books! Black beauty was a fav, and also White boots. More recently I thought Wolf Hall was very good. I howled my way through the Kite Runner. But I've read so many over the years I don't know where to start! You know I'm going to be thinking about this all day. You also know others on this thread will have rather more intelligent choices than me which reminds me, last night I was debating whatever I would put Riders in there

Nelly I knew it! I still remember a certain shower incident!!

Black beauty was a classic. Did you ever see the film though? Most odd.

Tricky cos.

I loved The Lovely Bones.
The Kite Runner was also brilliant.
Pride and Prejudice has to be my favourite of the classics.

Cos My fav book of all times is We need to talk about Kevin. Probably not good reading when pregnant though. I sobbed through The Kite Runner. Crime and Punishment is my fav classic.

Nelly. I think the lady was monitored by the GP and tested for testosterone levels - she used this to adjust how much Dhea to take. But she did say the GP was not keen to do it and she had to twist her arm.

nelly I must of had the blood tests done at CREATE/NLC when I was thinking of doing IVF here, my GP did a couple for me too as the clinic wrote me a letter asking them to do some for me, my GP was very supportive. My tests must have been more than 6 months old by the time I got there for treatment.
DHEA, I'm not sure how many GP's will touch the stuff but worth asking

nelly we both had our blood tests done through the GP thanks to the clinic

Hi Buggerlugs. Sorry to hear that.

You will know if you have OHSS. Your belly will become bloated. I am not talking bloated like after a massive meal or ivf muffin top I mean it will swell and become rigid. I couldn't put my own shoes on. Even my diaphragm was swollen.

You know how you have to pitch an inch to do the ivf injections, you won't be able to pitch anything in your stomach area as it's completely rigid and swollen. For me, I felt nausea and threw up a number of times. I couldn't lie back flat without the entire room spinning all around me. I also had a lot of pain when I peed. You don't need to have all this symptoms for it to be OHSS as there are different severity.

Important thing to do if you have do OHSS, get yourself seen to, they need to scan you to check how big your ovaries are and if water is also trapped near ovaries, pelvis or stomach or worst near your lungs (this can be v dangerous).

Things you can do to help yourself - drink water - up to around 2.5 litres a day but no more. Even better if you put some cordial or electrolytes powder in your drink - better than just plain water as too much of this will just make you retain it in your body. I also had salty broth. As hard as it is to drink anything you need to do it.

Don't eat any meals. Just snacks - very important to do this every 2 hours. Eat protein. I ate salty nuts, cooked boiled eggs with salt.

Salt, protein and liquids regularly. You need to drink and eat all day long.

I know delays are a pain but if you do have OHSS it's better to wait. FET has really good success rate anyway. Good luck.

buggerlugs good luck with EC. I'm sure sea will be along with some advice soon. I never got enough eggs to worry about ohss.

cos from my student days it would be Wide Sargasso Sea by Jean Rhys - a kind of prequel to Jane Eyre and War and Peace but kind of skimmed the war bits. Now that I am older and lazier I read mostly murder mysteries - Scotland seems to be particularly good at producing that sort of thing.

Cross post sea I see you've already given loads of good advice x

sea are you feeling better now? I hope you are past the worst.

nelly it looks like I can buy DHEA here in the US. Would you like me to get you some and post it? I might need to put it in a vitamin bottle or similar so it doesn't get nobbled by customs. Does anyone know what specific amounts you need? I'd love to be helpful.

cos my three favourite books at the moment are - Any Human Heart by William Boyd, I Capture the Castle by Dodie Smith, and Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides. And for a trashy but awesome read, Forever Amber by Kathleen Winsor and Katherine by Anya Seton.

Was it you cos who coined the term twibling? It's total genius and my family love it.

I think you also asked how many frosties I had? They told me five. I emailed my awesome IVF doc (of the rich mahogany waiting room) to tell him what happened and ask him to make sure they don't get discarded by accident, but I think my yahoo email might have gone in his spam folder so I'll resend next week from my work account if I don't hear back.

euro I would love to see you if you're in town. I might be in the UK around Easter, but I don't know which side of the holiday it will be yet - it would be amazing if our schedules lined up.

sea do you know if you got any frosties? Sorry if you said already. How are you feeling? I think it'll take a few weeks for the swelling to go down - as your uterus grows, it should squish out some of the fluid.

princess thank you for the kelly mom link. I have stopped with the cabbage leaves as the smell is bloody awful - think Chinese restaurant crossed with drains crossed with stale fart - and permeates everything. But I am still drinking sage tea, using cold compresses and just riding it out, and they seem to be slowly going down and hopefully will stop leaking soon.

Thanks to everyone for reassuring me that I can share here. Sometimes I feel fine and sometimes the feeling of grief comes back very powerfully and without warning in this huge overwhelming wave. When that happens I just try to focus on the physical sensation of the sadness and block out any thoughts. My parents leave today but MrC is going to work from home and only take on the odd project over the next couple of weeks so I will have company. And sister critter is coming out soon. I have been told the best tonic for this is time, human contact and creative endeavours. So have (perhaps morbidly) started knitting for the twibling already.

Thinking of you today critter. I love the name twibling, it's so cute. There are going to be some dark times when you will feel overwhelmed by grief, this is normal. You don't have to be strong all the time, and you can share anything you want to with us. I've heard fennel tea might be good too if you're getting bored with sage.

Both me and mrd are with cold, so sofa evening it is. I'll be back to write more when headache lifts. Waves to all.

critter time, human contact and some creativity sounds like the right prescription.

Twibling is so cute. My bestie's IVF trio are all twiblings from one full round. I think knitting for the twiblings sounds like a great project. Are you writing poetry as well? I can imagine that being a good outlet for grief.

I hope the mention of sending an email from your work account does not mean that you are contemplating going back any time soon...

It would indeed be lovely if our dates match.

ray I'm just getting over mine now. It was a stinker. I have just left the house for the first time since Monday morning! I've been out buying fat girl clothes. The vast majority of my clothes are quite tailored or clingy around the waist. That is not working out so well for me now I have a bloaty jelly belly to accommodate. Not that I'm complaining, of course, but it would be lovely to skip the flat stage and move straight to bump.

sea thanks for your advice to bugs. I know her from the BESH and Egg Buddies threads and she was just told this morning that she was at risk of OHSS and you have very fresh experience in that area! Is your BFP sinking in yet?