TTC 10+ months part 16

[Buzzybee123]

New thread for the lovely 10+ers.

Evening all,

sea I am so sorry that you've been thrown another curve ball. This stuff is all so frustrating. I felt like we wasted a whole year at one point with surgeries and drug treatments and it was just so hard. I don't know enough about immune issues to give advice but an unmumsnetty hug coming your way instead.

pout will big dog have to wear the cone of shame as well? The thought of a large dog in a playpen with the cone is just too pathetic for words... He will be so humiliated..... Not long now till the reunion .

mrsd remind me of your dates for the next cycle?

ten the endo diets all say to go gluten free but I couldn't hack it. I decided that if the goal was to reduce stress, that would not be achieved by me spending my whole life thinking about what I eat and don't eat. I try to be healthy - lots of fruit and veg and a personal trainer to kick me into shape. For now my exercise will just be walking. Swimming and some pregnancy Pilates after the first trimester sounds good to me too.

euro my journey was as follows:

• Long history of heavy and painful periods with bleeding mid cycle. No one told me that my level of pain was excessive so I didn't complain much, just took painkillers and hot water bottles and was miserable every month.

• doctors chopped and changed birth control pills to try and control the bleeding but never worked. I gave up on the pill about 8 years ago and decided to let my hormones sort themselves out.

• started trying to conceive in July 2010. Not a sniff of a BFP and lots of irregular bleeding.

• referred to fertility clinic. All initial tests normal. I am ovulating. MrM is perfectly normal.

• from first ultrasound scan it was clear that things were not right. Referred for a lap to diagnose endometriosis.

• while waiting for lap, develop acute illness which turns out to be a Fallopian tube abscess. Emergency surgery just after christmas 2011 in the middle of the night by non gynae surgeons drained the abscess but left the tube.

• specialist gynae then refers for MRI to establish severity of endo (no mention in notes from surgery!!!!!). MRI shows possible bowel involvement so sent for flexible sigmoidoscopy to check. That comes back clear so back on waiting list for a straightforward lap.

• surgery December 2012 removes large amounts of adhesions but not all as would risk colon and ovarian function. One tube removed as matted with scar tissue. Official comments from consultants "everything is pretty much stuck together in there" . Put on decapeptyl to downreg until ready for ivf.

• 4 months downregging. Cycle 1 produces only 2 eggs out of 10 follicles. One fertilises and put back on day 2. BFN.

• one month off, then 2 months downregging. Cycle 2 produces 8 eggs. All 8 fertilise but only 3 make it to day 3. One put back and two more frozen (that was a surprise yesterday - the nurse on the phone said just 1 had been frozen). BFP so far and fingers tightly crossed.

Man, that is an essay!! Waves to all I've missed but I have definitely written enough for today .

Mad, I should be starting next cycle fingers crossed so mid October. It's amazing to think you've finally cracked it, so happy for you.

Buzz, that is a coincidence, its sad to think of more people going through it. Sadly, losing a baby later in pregnancy is uncommon but not rare. I am fixated on getting over the first hurdle to tend to forget all of the other things that can go wrong. Did the lady on the other thread have Ivf with the pre implementation screening? My friend decided against it which I totally understand, but it does mean that the anxiety will be there until she has all the test results back.

Ugh, sea, I'm so sorry. How incredibly frustrating. What rubbish news. The waiting must feel interminable.

Oh my pout, that sounds... interesting! Good luck, I hope poor Big Dog recovers quickly.

ten I've gone gluten-light for the last few months. I can't be arsed to do full on gluten avoidance, but I've tried to hit the big offenders in my diet, so switched to spelt or gluten-free flour for home baking, started using lots of other grains to mostly replace of pasta, tend to choose rye bread, or just avoid bread altogether most of the time, etc. I went dairy-light and processed sugar-light at the same time, as they often go together in recipes for that kind of eating anyway.

Wow, cos and mad you've both been through so, so much. Keeping going through all of that is pretty inspiring. Hard-won, much-deserved baybees, indeed!

Re Mr Rum's hilarious story of jizz humiliation, it was just one of those things where you think if we don't laugh, we'll never stop crying! I was hysterical. It's good to get a giggle out of this shit where you can. Though I'm pretty sure he'll not be pleased I shared it with the whole internet... Not that he reads Mumsnet!

Hope everyone else is doing well. Waves to all.

Wow cos. What a journey to your BFP!

mad you have had an enormously rough ride. Is the win sinking in yet?

sea I'm sorry to hear that. How frustrating to have yet more waiting.

rum I have largely carried on exercising through IVF, but dialled down the intensity a bit when I felt I needed to. My clinic encourages gentle exercise in the 2ww as it increases blood flow to the womb.

ten I have tried going wheat free a couple of times, over 2 natural cycles and 2 of my 3 IVFs (including the one where I got pg but mc'd). The two natural cycles I had whilst wheat free were bizarre - my temps after ov were haywire and I came on at 8/9dpo, way earlier than normal and after I started bleeding my temps stayed up for a few days and my boobs were still sore. It was like the bleed was out of synch with everything else that was going on. I've been monitoring my cycles since we started ttc (35 cycles now) and this has only happened twice and it has only happened on my wheat free months. I am now eating wheat again because I want to get the coeliac test next month. Even if it is negative, I am going to go completely gluten free for a few months because it clearly has some sort of effect. I'm wondering if my two early bleeds could have been implantation failures, i.e. being wheat free for a few weeks means something happens but as my body is not completely clear of the reaction, it doesn't quite stick. Or it could just be coincidence.

pout I hope Big Dog recovers well. How are you feeling about the FET.

joy work colleague sounds like a nobhead. But soon you will be able to pass all your work to him and swan off on mat leave. :)

rum mr euro was amused by the story! (As was I )

Sea - I am so sorry to hear that. I am not sure how it works but what happens if you do another round of humira and the cytokines still don't go down, do you just keep doing it? Or is there a limit? If you do humira again, how long will this put you back- a few months?
Yes I plan to go back to Ana post EC to manage pain and post ET too. I haven't had acu once since last round.

Ten - I saw a nutritionist 3 months ago and she put me on a gluten free diet. There is quite a bit of research out there indicating a link between unexplained infertility and gluten. I haven't actually found it that hard as I was flirting with gluten free for a while.

Sweet - I don't think we are monitored in the office but this guy is the ultimate office rat. Very dominant and assertive and the manager doesn't dare say anything to him. He is so arrogant (oops I better not start again)

Mad - wow what a horrendous journey and now you have got a bfp. What an achievement , you should proud of what you have come through .

Mad and Cos you have both earned these pregnancies in the toughest possible way. I remember Mad you saying that a hysterectomy would be on the cards for you at some point. That made me stop in my tracks. I wish you both a worry free 8 months because by heck you both deserve it.

Sea that is such a blow about the cytokines. What do your doctors recommend? Are they sure this is a problem? Could you choose to cycle if you wished? Sorry for the questions, I wish I could advise instead of query. Hang on in there.

No time to name check everyone else so quick waves all round.

Thanks everyone. was rather cathartic to write it down. That said, we have all faced challenges through this process. I haven't been through a miscarriage yet please god let me skip that one and I had a diagnosis early on so didn't have to wonder why. Being under 35 has also made things easier on the nhs. Just wanted to say that there are positives as well as negatives and we have all earned the pregnancies that are coming our way.

Back to work!

sea I am so sorry that you didn't get the results you wanted and now things are delayed. I was gutted for you when I read that. I can imagine how frustrated you are and how it must feel like one hurdle after another. Not the same but when my FET kept being delayed with one thing or another I got extremely angry and despondent with everything. The only thing that helped me deal with it to an extent was to think that the universe had a plan and that things would happen at the right & preordained time IYSWIM. Big hugs to you.

I am really quite touched at being reminded of cos and mad's journeys to get their BFPs. What a long road for you both & a well deserved BFP.

Rum Sometimes all you can do is laugh. I have said it so many times but you really couldn't make all this crap up.

euro your experiences of your cycles in gluten free months is so interesting. I will be watching the result of your coeliac test with interest.

Thanks for the good wishes for Big Dog. His exploratory op will be sometime next week (we wanted to get the embryo transfer over before booking it so that I can be home with Big Dog) and then the big op will be at some point soon after. It will be tough on him and I feel a bit tearful when I think of it [soppy git smiley]. It is the fact that he won't understand why he will be confined to a pen with the cone of shame (I like that name mad!) while Little Dog is being taken out for walks and is free to roam around as normal. I am thinking that I will bring the camp bed downstairs at night so I can sleep with him. The thought of the rest of us trooping up to bed and leaving him alone is too horrible

Pout, that is so sweet that you'll sleep downstairs for big dog. They're very lucky to have you as their mummy. My cat is spoilt rotten, I'd love a dog but I don't think she'd like it.

Mad and cos, your stories are inspiring. We all are very deserving bunch.

Af is here, which I'm sort of happy about even though it means no ironic bfp. At least I'm closer to Ivf now. Had awful cramps this morning though and worrying that it means my cyst has returned. That would be bloody typical.

I think I might leave fb for a while. Today my newsfeed is all baby and bumps. I'm normally fine with it but not on cd1 and I don't think it would be good for me when doing Ivf. I can't just hide because its everyone so I'd have a blank screen. So if I disappear from there it's not that I've dropped off the earth hopefully

Pout what a lovely dog owner you are. I'm sure he'll appreciate you doing that very much.

MrsDen leaving FB sounds like a good plan. It does seem to be the medium of choice for baby saturation.

Had our fertility clinic initial planning meeting today. IVF a-go-go! I had my first delightful encounter with the dildocam - I really think there should be a 2 drink minimum for strangers inserting things into your nethers, but nevermind! The nurse unhelpfully took one look at my bits before dashing out of the room to get a doctor, leaving us alone for 20 mins, me naked from the waist down, just twiddling my thumbs. Thankfully the doc immediately declared my poor scary right ovary entirely normal, but there's a cyst I have to have rescanned before I can be properly booked in to start, and my left ovary disappeared and wouldn't be found after all that, so that was a bit of a waste of time and KY jelly. But, rescan appearances allowing, we could be set to go with my period next week! Feeling quite excited now, I think.

I'm now lying on the couch while Mr Rum does the hoovering. If I have to be "the patient" through all of this (nevermind there are TWO of us trying to make a baby, you wouldn't believe that at all for all that today's talk was directed at him), I shall milk it for all it's worth.

Great news you're so close now rum. I'm impressed you've got this far without yet encountering the lovely dildo cam. I've lost count of the number I've had. I never thought I'd be so casual about it all but it feels like the normal thing to do on a visit to the dr now.

I'm really surprised no one's been bothered to scan my bits till now, mrsden. They've felt frankly offended by the lack of attention paid to them. It would seem an obvious first line thing to do?!

Anyway, I was quite pleased by the thickness of my lining at any rate. I've worried before that maybe the mirena messed it up and made it go thin, with my short, sometimes light periods. But no, it was luffly today. Good uterus, naughty ovary, it would seem.

And Mr Rum still had his Usain Bolt quality sperm. At least only one of us is a bit broken.

Ah yes Rum that sounds familiar. Te irony here of course is that Mr Nelly is the one that did all the wrong things. Drugs in his youth, smoked until fairly recently, overly fond of laptops on knee and sperm killing cycling Lycra. And let's not forget he was the one who dithered for so long. Yet it turns out I'm the old useless one. . Anyway as MrsDen says, dildocam very soon becomes old hat. It honestly doesn't occur to me to think it weird anymore. Though I can imagine having the nurse go looking for help could be a bit alarming! Glad it all looks otherwise ok and you are in course.

MrsDen sorry about CD1. But be assured at least one of your FB friends doesn't have pregnancy updates . I kind of feel a bit unbothered about most of the ones I get, as they are so alien to me. It's just like when friends post about the gym. I just go "huh???". That said once in a while you do read something do ungrateful and it is very stabby.
Pout I am sorry Big Dog is going to have to go through an op but he is very lucky to have you to care for him . Colin will feel the same I'm sure.

Tea almost ready. Hope our newly preggos are managing some celebration in amongst the terror and knicker watch. And Mad it's sweet of you to play down your journey to this point, but it really is quite an epic one. Wallow in sticking fingers up to fertility gods

Mrsd - hats off to you for staying on FB for so long. I came off 3 years ago as I couldn't handle it. Out of sight out of mind. Although would love to have a peak at all your ladies lives. Sorry about cd1 but does that mean you are starting next month now or this month?

Rum- you have done well avoiding the dildocam . I believe I have met half of London's d-cams. Glad things are pressing forward for you. I had to have a cyst drained before my last round of ivf. Great news about your lining.

Nelly - I hear you on MrN's youth. Same as Roy. Yet things seem to point towards me. I didn't even go on the pill because I didn't want to mess with my fertility - how ironic!

Getting slightly stressed with things again. My clinic operates in a way where they called me tonight and said stay close to the clinic tomorrow as you will probably have to have ivig treatment. Firstly I asked whether I could request intrallipids. Then I tried to ask if I could just do it on Saturday because I can't just walk out of work for 4 hrs during the day. And I got the whole "you know how the clinic operates" . Which is fair enough I do but I also need my job and i work with very unapproachable people who I can't tell.
Also my Nk cells aren't that high and I can't really justify the cost of ivig but then again will i regret it if the cycle fails. Plus I heard someone went into anaphylactic shock recently at the clinic from having ivig and she had had it before.

Oh goodness what to do.

Joy, I wish I could offer you some good advice but I really know nothing about this area. I did think you'd said earlier that you weren't going to do Iving this time. Sometimes I think the best thing is to stick with the original plan. My cynical self wonders if the clinic are looking for more money, can they really justify why it's needed?

joy that sounds really difficult. I wouldn't react well to that kind of approach. I'd really want them to justify it.

mrsd sorry about CD1 but it sounds like you are not far away from your second go now and you are sounding very positive about it!

pout you sound like you are as soppy as I am about your pets. I really miss having them. The house seems so empty without some little furry thing charging around!

rum I can't believe you have escaped a dildocamming until now. I've had dozens of them! I know what you mean about the 2 drink minimum though!

joy your clinic is totally out of line talking to you like that,its a stressful business as it is without that kind of crap, I know they have this supposed great reputation but bullying people into their routine is not acceptable, why did they not plan this IVIG earlier in th eweek so you could organise time off
My nk cells were only slightly raised and I have intralipids. I only really know one person who has had IVIG, its a tough decision, maybe ask on the pred thread, they might have some advice

Hi ladies, room for a little one? Coming to the end of cycle 13, just started the doctor proceedings so have my 21day blood test on Monday. DH has his pot ready for SA too. So glamorous!

It's a glamorous life, Dulcet, just wait till you get to open wide for the dildocam! So sorry you find yourself here - may your stay be short for the best possible reason.

joy I have no idea at all about that stuff, but I'd be well miffed by a phone call like that. I hope you reach a decision that feels right to you, and I'm sorry about the stress! As if adding to it at this point is helpful...

MrsD does CD 1 mean this is the cycle you start downregging? Please excuse my ignorance if not, I'm just getting my head round the whole IVF procedure schedule!

It's good to hear from you ladies that I shall soon be ready to drop my pants for the camera at every given opportunity. I keep telling myself that pregnancy and childbirth and parenting come with all sorts of indignities and inconveniences - we're just getting a good dose of those early. Be prepared, and all that.

Hi ladies. Thanks for all the support and understanding. It's not been the result I wanted but having your soothing words has really helped me.

This is going to be a pathetic attempt at name checking but here goes.

Pout - I hope big dog is okay. You sound like an amazing dog owner. No doubt you will be an amazing mum. It's really exciting that you will be reunited with Colin soon.

Joy - I saw your post on FF immunes board and replied. Not sure how useful that is. I think you have to insist and make sure you talk to a doc. They will need to ask Dr T but you are more likely to get a sensible conversation with a doc than a nurse there. One thing I will say is I actually think they do only recommend treatment that they think is best and don't just do it because it costs more. I have asked for a few tests and they have insisted it's not needed. Their intralipids are more expensive than other places though. I think around 300 while you can get for around 180 at ZW. Anyway not a massive difference in the grand scale of things. Good luck. You have to do what you feel comfortable with.

MrsD thanks for your lovely words. Delays are v frustrating but I have decided it is what it is and I just have to go through the process.

Rum. Get ready to spread your legs a lot for the dildo cam. It sounds like you are well on your way now.

Nelly. I hear you on feeling like it's all down to us and not our DHs.

Cos and Mad. Reading your ttc stories really brought home what a journey you have both had. Truly well deserved BFPs. I hope your pregnancies will be the complete opposite to your ttc journey and v uneventful indeed.

Lemons - you must be doing you fet now. How is it going? I hope you are feeling well.

Euro - have you had your consultation at CRGH yet? How did you find them?

Rabbit - how's the new school term? Not too long now until your appointment.

Afm. After a half hearted attempt to say no to humira and insist on intralipids I decided i would just go with what the clinic suggested. I think they would let me go straight to intralipids but the hassle to get there wasn't attractive and i really dont want more stress. I'm gutted and feel enormous guilt about the added cost but I guess needs must. I think it was joy who asked. If after 2 course of humira the levels don't come down they then move to intralipids (max 3 times). 2 humira is the max they do. I hate the drug as I felt v v down after injecting and I had joint pains and chronic ibs. I just hope after all this I will someday get to hold my baybee.

I have missed loads but must go to bed now.

Morning lovelies!

Well done for getting this far without meeting the dildo-cam rum. You get very used to it. After your comment I realised I don't think twice about it all now. And don't trim the lady garden either, so I wonder whether they gossip about that

Welcome dulcet, I hope you won't be here for long.

Massive good luck for picking up Colin tomorrow, pout. Everything crossed for the next two weeks. And I am sure he'll be happy to have the playpen after big dog. I concur that you sounds fab with your dogs!

Joy I am furious on your behalf. It is just not acceptable not to discuss stuff with you and they should try to accomodate the jobs that pay for the expensive treatments! I don't have any advice, except that in my opinion this sort of patient-treatment is completely wrong.

Waves at the oh-so-deserved preggos. Well done, try to enjoy it, while you're stressing!

AFM I am having a sloooooow cycle, follie nearly ripe now (looking at a 29/30 day cycle, unheard of in the lemonland). Probably triggering tonight, picking lembie II next Wed.

Waves at the rest of you. Apologies for not name checking properly!

Thanks ladies, as meny of you I am sure I didn't think it would get to this stage but that's the way life goes I guess!

No mention of cameras yet but at least I am prepared for it. There's no dignity in this TTC or in childbirth so it's good prep!

There's so many new words on this thread to get used to! I am guessing a lot of it is medication that i've just never heard of. The wonders of modern medicine!

Hi dulcet. All the tech chat is because a lot of us are rather further down the line than the 10 months flagged in the title at this point and many of us are well along the IVF pathway now. It is a lovely supportive thread and it has helped me greatly over the past couple of years.

drizz that's come round pretty quickly.

sea I'm sorry that you are going back on the humira. It doesn't sound pleasant.

I haven't had my consultation at CRGH yet - it's on October. I am about to have a crazy few work weeks, so we booked it for afterwards. I came home to all the paperwork though, and just shoved it back in the envelope! I'm not ready to get back on the IVF train yet and don't even want to think about it for a while.

joy how are you doing? What did you decide to do about the IVIG?

Euro, I can identify with the shoving back in the envelope. It's taken me months to feel ready again and that was after only one go. I get a little shudder when I have to go past my clinic, one downside if it being so close to my home.

Welcome dulcet. Don't worry about all the technical names just ask if there's something you don't understand.

Lemons, if trigger is tonight does that mean ec is on Saturday?

Joy, have you made a decision? I don't understand why they only decided today about the Iving.

No mrsd it's a frostie-round. So we can try and catch this egg the natural way on Saturday, but they simply defrost lembie II on Tuesday, and we go to pick it up on Wednesday, I think. No EC for six months, at least for me and more importantly no DRing...

When are you starting again?

It does not feel so fast to me, because pre-IVF my cycles were 25-27 days, now it appears they are 27-29 days... I suppose it is more "normal" but it feels slow to the inpatient me. Not sure whether it was IVF or the chem diffment or none of the above.

On other news I had a good chat with the über-boss at work yesterday and they are as happy about me, as I am about working there so that is all good news!