We laugh in the face of OPKS and stomp on our thermometers! Don your customised shag capes, ladies; it's Just Shagging Thread 15

[Bearface]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 14 is here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1674505-Out-with-the-OPKs-ban-the-body-temping-heres-Just-Shagging-thread-14

The link to the latest grads thread is here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1699553-Shagged-Out-Viroids-7th-Thread-From-conception-to-birth-living-proof-that-JSing-really-does-work

Happy shagging shaggers!

Morning everyone.

Sorry in all the Last Pee Stick excitement I forgot to actually tell you the results! She isn't up the duff and actually got ERTD this morning. Phew as they were not ready as are both in a total pre wedding flap. She is on pill but useless at taking it.

So CD32, ERTD 5 days late. No sign of ANYTHING! New pee sticks should arrive today in post though so I'll do one tomorrow morning. I promise. Body feels dormant though rather than upduffed.

Quark I've had smidgins of pink mucus randomly mid cycle some months, and then nothing other months - no idea what it means?

ooh - hi to Gnome! Welcome!

Lil, 13 pairs! WOW! We're they all Manalo Blaniks (sorry I can't spell it either!)??!! rock I'd be distraught too if all my shoes stopped fitting!! Thats a tragedy! Haha to whoever it was who had to taken all their pairs home from work! Brilliant! I used to always end up with loads of pairs in the car til I made a NY res to take them in the house every day and somehow managed to stick with it and retrain myself! Not something I am usually good at!

ice - sorry she got you too. I guess its good she's still working after 18 months, but still means only one thing so I know why you are :(

Sorry to those I've missed - this fred moves so fast now! Which is good but not for my slow moving brain!

On the topic of coming off the pill, I've been pretty lucky as ERTD cycles pretty much back to normal immediately after 17 years taking it, though ovving has been a bit up the spout ever since. GP told me to allow at least 6 months though for things to get back to normal.

DH wanted me to come off it last summer but we'd planned a once in a lifetime trip to a remote part of South America where we have friends, and I was scared of getting upduff before we went as its a good 5-6 hours (10-12 if it rains!) drive from their place to nearest hospital, so I stayed on pill til after we got back (December). Ye Law of Ye Sod would have had me preggers the min I'd come off it if it had been before the trip though I'm sure.

Re coming off the pill - DS was a happy accident, I'd spent 10 years on the pill with no problems, missed a week or so of pills but only DTD once in that time. 9 months later I was a mum :)

Morning girls (morning here in Mexico), just read through new posts, it all got a bit glum for a while so I popped out to the virtual corner shop, picked up a pack of pixilated pic n mix and am dishing it out as we speak.
On iPad in iffy wifi area so can't really scroll through for fear of losing my connection, but welcome to newbies and yay for pregnant friends, unpregnant brides and shoe fiends.
Is it really true about feet going up a size? I'm a size 9 now so I'll be screwed!
May have a bit of tmi here but... I've done all the right things this month at all the right times and yesterday went to loo and as I wiped there was this gelatinous glob of something. It didn't resemble EWCM but more of (and I'm sorry for this) the jelly which comes around a pork pie!
Any ideas? I've not got any of the symptoms from precious months, but a few more spots and a bloody stuffed snoz!
I'm off to google and get loads of ideas, none of which will turn out to be my case at all and hopefully I'll be a little wiser once again,
Ciao for now bellas.

Pic and mix, my fave! Google will just tell you you are pregnant whatever. Sore throat, hair loss, crap at driving all equals pregnancy to google!

I have started to obsess. Opening period tracker app to work out various possible dates for different things! Convince myself I could be and then That I can't be. I just don't know anymore and not DTD since Friday now. Is it enough?!

Well I just caved, went to sainos (other supermarkets are available) and bought a test and got a fooking massive BFN.

So pass me the pic n mix and sorry if the bag is empty when I hand it back.

Stupid body.

Hi Minion! Hope its nice and warm? Northerly wind picking up here in the 'shire. Yay for summer!

Dulcet, I don't know anymore either, one min I think I am then I think I'm not, then I know I'm not, then I just want to scream! SOMEONE SLAP ME!

So sorry Essie, hope you get you're BFP soon!

Oh Essie that's crap. Try again tomorrow morning with FMU maybe?

Thanks for the pick and mix Minion. Very jealous of you in Mexico although the sun is out here! Don't have any advice to offer on your pork pie jelly! How confusing are our bodies huh?

Still no more spotting from me, just the tiny bit of pink mucus I got last night. I am doing my own head in reading up on implantation bleeding! Anyone here had that before/know anything about it?

I've had a word with myself, a name change, and a cup of tea.

How on earth did our mothers and grandmothers cope without pee sticks so cheap you could do a dozen a day?!

Poor you Essie
Sorry to sidetrack but where in South America? Sounds ace! DH and I delayed baby making due to travelling there as well- mainly because I was taking anti malaria pills and I'd heard horrible things about the risks they pose to a foetus.
Thanks for the sympathy folks. Am looking on the bright side of having ERTD as I am hoping this means I am ovulating (well not right now but YKWIM) hence upduffed is possible. Although I am getting horrible cramps so pass the pick'n'mix this way please!

Just looked at test again (2+ hours since peeing) and there is a thin line. I probably ought to heed the instructions and throw it away since it says clearly to 'discard after 10 mins and stop obsessing'.

We went to Brazil, specifically The Pantanal, though we visited Rio and Iguazu as well. It was amazing. I loved it so much and I'd love to go back one day. I've heard nasty things about anti-malarials too, luckily we didn't need them. I had to have the yellow fever jab though and apparently you shouldn't have that if you are upduffed either.

Sorry about the nasty cramps, poor you, hope it doesn't last long. Sweeties will help!

As long as you save me the fried eggs you lot can gorge on the other sweets, 'spesh the cola bottles, I'm not a fan.
I'm just about to leave Mexico, I've been here or 15 hours, had a burger, went to bed, instagrammed a pic or two and now it's time for me to drag my sorry transatlantic style.
A little bit more pork pie snot...ewwwww but seems to have one watery again.
Mental.
I'll see you on t'uther side of the water.
Hasta mañana!

Oh oh essie I forgot... I hope it's a big fat positive line for ou! Fingers are firmly crossed x

Blimey folks, I can't keep up! Sorry to those who got ERTD. Essie - fingers crossed for you getting a BFP.

Minion - hope you're enjoying Mexico. I'm a bit of a baby about going to some countries and I have to say I'm scared of South America because I'm worried about the crime. I know I'm a big girl's blouse, but I can't help it. I do have VERY bad luck too, so if something were to happen it would be to me fo sho. BTW, I think your CM is EWCM even though it may not look like it. I remember my fertility book biblesaying it can be blobs and can be tinged pink.

Lil - 13 pairs????!!! Bloody 'ell, that makes me feel a lot better. I didn't buy them in the end but might when I get paid but did buy two dresses instead.

I am hoping ERTD does one soon, so I can get my cape on again.

So, er, say if I wanted to download a fertility app, which er, one would you go for? I hear you're the ladies to ask in this town.

Hello all

gnomie I didnt have to deal with as bad as a 63 day bleed but I did have a 49 day bleed after two apparently "normal" cycles... nice to know I don't hold any records tho!

rock there's that law if sod again...missing pills and DTD once....its actually rather rude don't you think!

thanks for the pic'n'mix minion but sorry I can't add anything to the pork pie saga either. I suspect it could have been ewcm though. tmi alert - I noticed once when mine had made it yo my underwear and it had dried a bit it was more like the glue they use to put credit cards onto the letters they send them out on, so maybe yours goes jello fat like??

dulcet you are right about Google. I'm breathing, surely that means I'm upduffed, no?

Essie I can't believe you caved. now be a good viroid and break out the fmu tomorrow. if its a bfn just try and relax remember the name change, you could have over later than you thought whispering .... was it you who used contraband thus month? if so what did you use? if just opks that won't tell you you def ovd just that you had an lh surge, but fx you report a bfp tomorrow.

quark spotting sounds promising...how many do do you think you are? isnt it supposed to happen 7-10dpo? fx for you.

ice you are welcome to the cola bottles if that helps your cramps. just make sure there's wine if when I need it at the end of the tww!

Ill have the foamy hearts then please. Love 'em!

I think I know the pork pie-esque substance you are talking about. Not that it helps but it sounds familiar to me.

Crickey I obv took too long to type.

hi cookie

bear I use fertility friend because I used to use contraband alot and find its really easy to understand and gives you things to tick in certain days wheb you're symptom spotting and you can make notes too. I record my stress full days, when I get spots, when in really tired etc so it helps build up a pattern of what's normal for when in your own cycle

It would be devastatingly expensive if i ever went up a shoe size, i love my shoes i would have to replace them all as they are so pretty

Completely forgot that i downloaded that fertility app, so i've put all my info on it tonight. I'll blame lil for that one

Hello Newbies

Essie fingers crossed for tomorrow can't believe you would give away your last pee stick glad your friend is not up duffed though, i remember me in my pre wedding flap.

I'll be using my other contraband this month due to i really want to get pregnant before my brothers wedding next year in California, i am giving my self till Sept to try then stopping till June if nothing happens.
So i figure i've got to give it my best shot right??

Sorry cookie but as long as you don't slip into obsession as I have done in the past, but come on, 49 day bleed...I needed to know I was ovulating! then there is nothing wrong with taking a little control but I will not be held responsible for your inputting antics. California wedding sounds Ace!

Oh frick. If it was ewcm then ive missed my bloody ov date this month. And its a week over the date I thought it would be...
Balls.

Good morning Viroids!

Minion my EWCM and +ve contraband was a week later than expected too, so guessing thats why my ERTD is now a week late as well? All v confusing!

So I piar with fmu this morning and got another shiny bfn. Still no sign of anything. Haven't told DH yet I'm even late cos he'll get excited and I can't face that.

Ohh cookie a Cally wedding, that sounds amazing! I've never been to a wedding out of the UK.

Bear I'm a bit weedy about crime overseas as well, but despite that I've managed to travel quite extensively with DH as we decided to try and cram in as much as we could while we could. I didn't feel unsafe in Brazil though, even in Rio, however I spent the whole time in South Africa being terrified and it did overshadow my enjoyment of that trip a bit really. DH just thought I was being neurotic.

My app is the originally titled Period Tracker, but it does what it says on the tin and is quite easy to use.

No other news from Essie's camp I'm afraid. Have a lovely Thursday though all. xxxx

Does anyone have tips on extending LP? I can't decide if I ov really early (which hopefully I do as I planned for that this month!) or late as I now have cramps and CM with 8 days to go. That's not enough time!!

Pounced on DP last night anyway but it took a 'chat' about him making an effort! I don't want to have to talk about it either but if he doesn't take the hint when I make the move its the only way!

Hi dulcet, I read somewhere that B6 is supposed to help with extending LP and improving your cycle. It's on this forum somewhere, and on other forums. I'm not sure of the details, but if you google it there should be lots of info.

Fab, thanks blue! I am pretty regular but worried about ov date as I'm sure it's not half way. In a fair amount if pain today so something us going on!