We laugh in the face of OPKS and stomp on our thermometers! Don your customised shag capes, ladies; it's Just Shagging Thread 15

[Bearface]

Ladies, Fred title says it all; we are the ones who shag as much as our men can cope with in order to get upduffed without the stress of scientific whatnots!

Fred rules (copied from previous Fred)

1. Thou shalt shag as much as humanly possible in order to get upduffed.
2. Thou shalt not partake of OPKs, temping, or charting.
3. Thou shalt keep symptom spotting to a minimum.
4. Thou shalt share and with your fredmates where needed.

JSing lingo;

ERTD = Evil Red Tide of Dooooooommmmmmm. Or AF to most others.

Pant snot = Egg white cervical mucus.

Doing a kitten = Getting upduffed soon after joining (warning: may induce in other posters).

Viroid = This is you, dear poster. This is from the first JS thread when someone tried to type 'ladies' and it autocorrected to 'Viroids' - so there you go!

POAS = Pee On A Stick (of the pregnancy detecting kind, not from a tree). Also known as PIAR (Pee In A Ramekin - cos we're posh birds innit). Or PIATLH (Tea light holder) PIAWG (Wine glass) or anything else you care to pee in!

Shagging like something = JSing like a teenage nymphomaniac.

Giving a hooya = Giving a much needed slap to a fellow poster in danger of slipping into ttc obsession.

Contraband = Of COURSE none of us EVER partake of any silly OPKs or temp charting. They are Contraband.

The link to Part 14 is here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1674505-Out-with-the-OPKs-ban-the-body-temping-heres-Just-Shagging-thread-14

The link to the latest grads thread is here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/antenatal_clubs/1699553-Shagged-Out-Viroids-7th-Thread-From-conception-to-birth-living-proof-that-JSing-really-does-work

Happy shagging shaggers!

Oh no. Sorry Rock. Good to know your body is getting back on track though.

Hi Stroke. Don't think we've met. Unless I knew you in a previous incarnation? I know what you mean about being a relief to give up the hardcore exercise but at the same time I'd love to be er, ripped and not have to feel miserable about my weight. Wish I was just naturally thin but alas no. I am built like an eighteenth century wench instead. What's your back story then Stroke?

Btw Conceive Plus gave me thrush so I stopped using it

Ah, maybe I posted on a completely different thread! Ooops sorry - ah, let me introduce myself then. My name is Stroke and I'm 33, live in the Caribbean with DH, DS who is 19 months and two of the most stupid shepherd mix mutts known to man.

Not much of a backstory really, DH and I decided at the beginning of May to started trying for no. 2, so shagged like dirty monkeys when we went up to New York a couple of weeks back but despite DH being sure that his strong Scottish sperm was a sure thing, I got caught by ERTD on Monday. I don't know much about opks or charting (?) but just working out when I ovulate from the cramps I always get mid-cycle. Tis a whole new world for us, DS was completely unexpected!

I've got to say though, experiencing my first two week wait was a fecking nightmare, symptom spotting every single second! And I couldn't even help it, I think I nearly went crazy. I vow not to do that going forth!

Morning all! Hi stroke nice to meet you. Sorry to hear ERTD got you rock.

Well no ERTD here so I piapc with a cbd and fmu and I got a BFN. Me and DH are a bit as the my missing ERTD. Will just wait and see what happens now.....

ah quark I was sure u were going to get bfp. you must have ov later than you thought?

I caved and aso piapc .... bfn here too. so I can stop symptom spotting now and wait for ertd :(

I'm 2 days late girls...
But I honestly think the pork pie jelly incident was a late OV! So that puts me roughly on in 5 days time... I'll update as and when.
And vendor has canx house viewing..boooo.

Welcome stroke, what part of the Caribbean do you live in?
rock hope it's getting back to normal for you too xx

Hallo ladies. I have a few minutes before DS wakes and am actually able to type properly on a proper computer, not one of these flipping ipaddy things. Sooo....

Minion - could you have ov'd late due to stress?
Quark - I have no idea what your post means..I am not good with the acronyms, but there is always hope until the fat lady signs, and I am not signing yet!

Hello Stroke! Bet it's nice and sunny where you are!

Bear - Prof Google! Hilarity! I am a big fan of him/her myself, especially when it comes to symptom spotting and/or hypochondria

sorry, meant to say sing...not sign!

Well, there's lateness all round. You should all go and sign in on the late register! hang in there everyone. Could this month be a bumper batch?

Strokes - whereabouts are you? Gawd, wish I was in the Caribbean. Instead I'm in the grey uk with a coleslaw (cold sore). Misery!

totes no stress here! It's probably still getting rid of the last remnants of the pill now so maybe I'm in for a long cycle. All I know is I'm not getting the constant lower backaches (hooray), the constant PMS cramps (double hooray) and the stretchy boob feeling. Just got a few minor twinges and a rushing type feeling in boobs.
So from now on I'm hoping this is as bad as PMS gets for me or I'm upduffed

Oh lucky you Minion if you don't get PMT, it's a bugger for sure!

It takes a while for things to normalise après Pill.

I don't think I'm lucky tbh. The last few months were pretty awful PMS wise. Think my husband thought I was putting it on but 2 weeks of cramping really does ones head in after an hour.

Two weeks?! Harsh!! My sister used to have a similar severity. Mine was very mild pre pregnancy and worse post. Unless you are upduffed of course, which could explain it...

Oooh Minion, fingers crossed for you being two days late - I heard a lot of people fall pregnant immediately after coming off the pill, or is that an urban legend?

I'm back on a strict paleo diet for 30 days which I did for the first time in April - it was fantastic and I had no cravings but it did lengthen my cycle by 3 days which prompted the pregnancy scare and this whole trying for a second malarky! So I'm wondering if this month will be the same - apparently eating this way is supposed to be good for fertility though (not the reason I went on it though) and increases your fertile time so we'll see.

Bear I'm in Grand Cayman - sure it's gorgeous here but I'm pleased to tell you that right now it's chucking it down. Beginning of the rainy season. Let me tell you, there is no amount of frizz ease that can control my mop in this humidity! Hopefully you all start getting a summer in UK soon, it's been really harsh for you the last few months.

Quark sorry to hear you're waiting for ERTD but it ain't over til it's over! Fingers crossed it either shows up soon or you get your bfp.

Yep- two weeks is loooooonnngggg Minion. I only have it for an hour or two every cycle and very mild so I feel very lucky, but then I do have the most ridiculously long ERTD which is on average 11 days and that is not pretty. Think I'd rather have loooooooonnnnnnngggg PMT over loooooooonnngggg ERTD, but that's just my personal preference. Swings and roundabouts, huh?

Still, it doesn't take away from it being crap and so sending you and and one of my special cushions to cuddle up with.

It's not 2 weeks of really very painful cramping but more like mild cramping, enough to go on with my day to day life. The first day of actual ERTD is horrendous and lasts all day long.
Never had pains on the pill so this baby better be worth it haha. Beginning to feel AF type rumblings at the mo' so onto holiday JSing it is then.

OK, to take minds of PMT and possible pre-pregnancy symptoms, is anyone off someplace lovely for holidays this year?

Hi ladies.
Sorry to hear about the bfns today and ertd rumblings. Boo.

Welcome stroke, I've been to Grand Caymen! It was in 2003 for 2 weeks, then the following year it got flattened by that terrible hurricane, very scary.

Blimey Bear 11 days. Thats torture. I do get very bad cramps now things have settled post pill, but it usually only last 3-4 hours, though in that time I want to crawl about on my hands and knees its so bad. I will never complain about it again though as I only get 3 day ertds, which is a breeze compared to you.

CD7 here, so nothing exciting. I've got to have a smear test the day we get back off hols and I'm petrified because for the last 2 years they have all been abnormal and I've had 2 rounds of that awful treatment where they burn away your cervix (sorry tmi) and so I so want this one to be all clear now so I can put all that behind me.

I'm off to Mexico for 11 nights on the 11th June so am impatiently counting down the days left at work.
Anyone else?

Going to Greece on sunday for a week. Totally demob happy!

Oooh Mexico - I'd love to go. Would you believe it would probably cost me the same to get there from here as it would from London? Ridiculous non?
DH and I wanted to go to Argentina for our honeymoon, it was going to cost $1700 each! It would have been cheaper for us to fly back to London and then come back to Buenos Aires.
Mexico will be fantastic though and it's got such a great vibe.

Essie I am most jealous that you're heading to Greece, whereabouts are you going? We used to go every year and I've been to Rhodes so many times I've lost count. I would love to go back, I can almost smell the air!

Ooh I've never been to Greece before so I'm excited. We're going to Thessalonika (sp?), or near there, some resort on the beach which looks amazing in the pics so hopefully won't be a let down!

How absurd that it costs so much to get anywhere from GC. I visited on the way back from 6 months in New Zealand as I stopped over in the US and hopped over to GC to visit friends as back then it was really cheap to do so!

I bet Mexico will be awesome Minion. I'd love to go too.

I know not of Grand Cayman Stroke but that is because I am not very well travelled. I will look it up though. Having said that, I have been to a few exciting places but not nearly as many as I'd like. We're off to Germany in a few weeks and might be going to the US later in the year. We were going to go to Canada but it looks like it will be too dark, cold and miserable when we were planning to go, so elsewhere it is. Greece sounds nice, as does Mexico, but we have established I am a travel scaredy cat about Mexico and Greece is too hot for delicate little Bearface in the summer. It's all that fur . . .

Sorry for the BFNs, people. Not fun, but I am still waving my flag for you just in cases.

I am having an Ov Party to which you are which you are all invited. I got some signs two lines on my contraband today and we DTD LAST NIGHT!!!! Yeehah! We seem to ahve timed it correctly for perhaps the first time ever. Ov Party will be rather different to the Pity Party for those of you who were there for that one. Perhaps a tad less alcohol but still with nibbles and bikinis onesies for those of you who wish to partake in some spa activity. Actually, you can all get drunk and I'll just capture the evidence on my phone!

Oh no not the horrible BFN, i hate those!!!

Jealous of all those who are living in far out places, and going on holiday, must be lovely.

Its snowing on Eastenders its raining in the real world well where i live anyway!!

The worst thing ever has happened to me - i've lost my filofax, everything is in there and also a really cute photo of my sister, nephew and bil.

Where do you think it might be ladies!!

Im very excited girls. Itll be our 3rd time in Mexico. This year is our 5th wedding anniversary prob thelast adults only resort we'll go to for a while.
I would love to go to grand Cayman! Had a Google, looks lush.