TRC 10+ months. Part 15...

[MuddyWellyNelly]

New thread for the lovely 10+ers. 14 was awesome so another like that please!

buzz any news yet? Thinking of you.
Wanted to say also how crap it was of Mr Shehata to plant that seed of doubt in your mind. Don't doubt yourself for a second. You did nothing on a whim. You thought everything through, weighed everything up and did what was right for you and MrB. I agree with others that his ego was dented. Twat.

lemons Sounds like the IUI went very well indeed. FX that this is the one!

euro Yikes at the pinchers! It all sounds very promising.

sea hope that you get on alright with the temping.

sarlat Gee, 10 weeks already. Wow.

gin any news with you. I'm so sorry that you had a meltdown.

That whole Kate Garraway thing pisses me off too. Not because I am particularly opposed to the message behind it, even though it does seem a bit ridiculous (most women who delay motherhood do so for very good & unavoidable reasons) but because I can't stand her. She is such a lightweight journalist/personality who just rubs me up the wrong way. That said it could be worse. They could have chosen some nubile, uber fertile youngster to front the campaign. Can you imagine!

News at this end is we are delaying the FET. The cycle monitoring is just too inconvenient for us this month so we are having to delay that and therefore delaying the FET too. Feel a bit miffed but hey. Also have sinusitis and so am feeling a bit sorry for myself. The good news is I have a prescription for antibiotics from the dentist from a couple of weeks ago so hopefully they'll knock the face ache on the head and might also help with the updiffedness

Boo to sinusitis but yay to antibs pout. that's a shame that you have to postpone the fet, when will you be able to do it now? We probably could have done our next round pretty soon but for life events that can't be moved. I was really upset about the wait but now I think October will be here pretty soon and at least I get to enjoy a summer of non ttc madness. I have a real fear about another non pregnant Xmas though, I don't know why this is such a milestone for me.

That Kate woman is in the daily fail today whoops admitting i read their online site, very ashamed at that with an article trying to explain the campaign. I still don't get it, maybe I'm being dim but I read the whole article and still couldn't understand what it is about. Stupid woman also made me really cross moaning about not being able to have a third when she admits her first two were easily conceived. I wouldn't be at all surprised if she announces a pregnancy soon and then says its all down to first response.

Buzzy, any news?

I keep thinking how had she herself not delayed motherhood and not focussed on her well paid career where she (presumably) met her equally well paid husband, would she have financially been in a position to contemplate a second or third child? Life wends and winds and the blanket message of this campaign simply doesn't take into account the complexities of life. Un fortunately we are not all comfortable with the idea of get duffed and sod the consequences. Some of us were very much aware of the responsibilities, both emotional and financial, of bringing a child into this world and waited to get our ducks in a row.

at your DM shame. MrP literally won't have the paper in the house and if I want to read a DM link I have to go incognito on Google Chrome!

I hear you on the Xmas thing. I find it an utterly depressing milestone too. I think it's because Xmas is for children and it is a stark reminder of how we don't have a family of our own.

I so hear you on the Xmas thing. My due date was late October so for a short time I let myself day dream about a Christmas with our newborn. If I'm not upduffed by then, it is going to be very, very hard.

buzz I'm thinking of you.

pout sorry that you are having to put off FET.

sar 10 weeks already - wow!

mrsd you are sounding loads better. I hope you feel it!

Oh Buzzy I am so furious with your idiot doctor. I mean really what was he thinking? You should definitely send that bastard man a letter. He just barrelled in like a territorial egotistical oaf (he might as well have just pee'd around your chair) without a thought to you, the irrelevance of his verbal drivel at this point, och I'm just spluttering with incredulity. But as everyone has said you made the best decision with your circumstances, we don't all have the time or the money to try every scenario available, we have to narrow it down to our best shot and you did that and it paid off!! Hope the spotting settles down and that you are looking after yourself.

Euro that biopsy procedure sounded gruesome but glad that it is all looking ok so far. I'm glad that you put the last medic in London out of his misery and let him have a look at your chuff and omg I have one of those secret sperm hiding compartments up there too! Did the iodine ever come back out? I have been on the edge of my seat waiting to find out Thanks for the giggle.

Lemon ohhh I've got everything crossed for your recent IUI. It would be sooo nice to sneak in a wee bfp just before you embark on the ivf shenanigans

MrsDen we are really private people too. I hate having to lie to friends but I just couldn't bear for everyone to know because when I am feeling like a failure then I will imagine that everyone else thinks I'm a failure too As it is I think everyone has long given up on us having children anyway. I did open up to my sister not so long ago and she is great for absorbing all the excess spill over nuttyness that this situation produces ? which spares MrBopit I made MrBopit promise not to tell anyone especially MIL but he slipped up and now she knows. Initially I was furious but then I realised that he might need to speak to someone bar me about it too so I've forgiven him. So we each have a person but that's as far as it goes. It's too painful a topic for me to be open about. I feel exposed and vulnerable at the thought of people knowing so I understand you protecting your privacy. I hope you manage to get your infection sorted soon, there's nothing worse than feeling physically crummy when you are already feeling a bit low.

Nelly hmmm child unfriendly, big and dangerous? I am picturing you with a baby en tow gazing longingly at an unused motorbike outside your house! Sorry about the 3 announcements and I totally understand your reaction to the clinic letter too. After my first appointment they sent a summary of our discussion and there is something about seeing the very personal and sad details of your situation in print that makes your situation feel much more grave. It really made me stop dead in my tracks. Anyway onwards! Your plan sounds great.

Joy I dearly hope that this holiday is just what your mind and body needs to give you a second wind in the whole ttc journey

Sea good luck with the charting. I took my temps for ages and it became second nature to stick the thermometer in my mouth as soon as the alarm went off. It's comforting to see a temperature rise after ovulation and (if you are a sad sausage like me and put all the data on a spreadsheet) it's really interesting to have an overview to look at later too. Are you in the midst of the tb treatment at the mo?

Pout it's a shame you are having to delay the FET. I'm at the stage where I want everything to happen NOW and it's really frustrating to be forced to wait. I'm very curious, what is the deal with antibiotics and diffedness? I only ask as I was recently diagnosed with helicobacteria in my stomach and took a 10 day course of antibiotics to clear it so if this is going to increase my chances in any way then fabulous Actually when I got home after the diagnosis and googled 'helicobacteria and infertility' (of course) there was actually some research to say it affected cm so that sperm were impeded from getting to the egg. But loads of people have it without knowing and it's really common in developing countries and our fertility doc poo poo'd the notion it was causing our infertility so pfff no answer there. Anyway hope the antibiotics knock the infection on the head, face ache is horrid.

Sorry Sar you are still vomiting hope you feel better very soon. Love to the other diffed ladies too.

Waves to everyone else Must dash and tidy the house before MrBopit gets home and realises I've wasted a whole afternoon on the internet I have mostly been researching our holiday but have little to show for it....
In my news, af came yesterday which was a bit late. I'd found a pregnancy test during a cupboard clear out the other day which expired in 2011 (ffs) so I pee'd on it to put myself out of my misery on Tuesday (I knew I wasn't pregnant but I still needed to quash the blind hope). Now on second month of (pointless) clomid and fiddling around trying to break the tiny tablets in half so I only take the 25mg dose Oh how is my clomid buddy Ramona getting on?

hey ladies

thanks for your support, I've had a crap 24 hours, EPAU did a blood test and it came back at 1248 which they are happy with my progesterone was only 22 which seems a bit low to me, I had a look at my old blood test results and on the day of my blood test for my last pregnancy my progesterone was 34 and that was just 1 day after my period was due anyway I emailed Shehatas nurse who said to up my arse bullets to 3 a day, I'll be back soon just going to have dinner

Zippy I appear to be an exception to the rule "what goes up must come down". I have no idea where the iodine, silver nitrate and other stuff he shove up there ended up.

Sorry to hear AF arrived.

Buzz I'm glad about the HCG level. That's great. :)

We have just dtd. My fanjo appears not to be broken. Hurrah. I have produced more EWCM today than I usually do in a year. The mc seems to have thrown me back to my early 20s in that regard.

pout sorry about delay to FET, I hope you feel better soon

sar hopefully the sickness will subside in the next couple of weeks

zippy its hard telling people but having support in real life is important, you are not a failure and i'm sure most people don't think about who might have the so called 'problem', I've pretty much told everyone and no one has asked me, and if they want to speculate then its up to them

sea good luck with the charting

euro the reprofit women seem to think that my progesterone is lowish and have suggested getting the oil, so I'll ask Shehata tomorrow and I have emailed Reprofit, I just hope its not too late, I feel very crampy right now and I'm still spotting, I'll have to see what happens this week

buzz I've posted on the other thread - your level doesn't seem too low by the levels given on the babycentre website. And you can take extra progesterone to boost it. I won't tell you to try not to worry, because I know it's futile. x

Sorry about the spotting and the stress buzz. Fingers crossed all is well, but it is rubbish in the meantime, irrespective of the end result!

at the wasted afternoon on the internet zippy. Hope the next cycle won't be futile but fully functional!

Sorry you've had to postpone the monitoring cycle pout. And sinusitis is evil, I have it quite regularly. Fingers crossed it goes away with your dental ABs.

Hope joy is having a fab time faraway from us and everything TTC related!

The sickness sounds awful sar. But hurrah for 10 weeks already. Only two weeks til glowy trimester!

I occasionally glance at the Fail as well mrsd, but I always feel slightly as if I am prying in people's private life, which I suppose I am. Oh well. The chrome-antics made me smile pout.

Thanks for all the good IUI wishes, I am pretending it did not happen which is hard as apparently my cervix is really tight and she draw some blood so I've been spotting and getting my head round the start of IVF in less than two weeks . Oh and I got a pregnancy announcement from a colleague who I shared my office with, no longer thankfully!

buzz I am so pissed off for you that you are having the worries of spotting and some cramping. Like euro says I know it won't ease your stressing to know but this is a common theme on the pregnancy boards. The additional stress is so unfair given the hard route the ladies on this board take to get their bean. Hopefully the additional progesterone will work some magic and let you enjoy this time.

lemons Marvels at your tight cervix says the woman whose own cervix always feels open which surely can't be good When is test day?

euro I have never had the leaky delights promised after laps and HSGs. Not complaining but you do have to wonder where the hell it all goes

mrsd I kept meaning to ask you about your possible UTI and kept forgetting. My bladder went all funny for weeks after my EC and I was getting up many times in the night to wee & also pondered whether I had an infection. Though it's quite a lot better I noticed on my antibiotics leaflet that they are used to treat UTIs so I am doubly glad to be taking them and hope to shift any lingering water works problem. Has yours cleared up at all?

zippy Holiday planning sounds nice. Sorry that your AF arrived. I found that the arrival of my period on my Clomid cycles affected me the most. I'm talking full on sobbing and throwing things! Breaking those tablets is an art! I used to worry about one half pinging on the floor and accidently drugging my dogs.
The telling people thing is difficult. My Mother took that decision out of my hands and I am still hugely pissed off about it. I feel really exposed & very much like she took ownership of my issue and had no right. I really don't need to manage other peoples expectations of our IVF journey as well as my own. That said I think that it is good to choose a select group of people to confide in though and I did tell my sister too. Sometimes I think you need to talk outside the marriage about it. Gah at the MIL thing!!!! My MIL's only comment was "thank God, as long as there's nothing wrong with MrP"

My period is winging her delightful way. Spotting started on CD25 this month so I still don't feel back to normal after the treatment. I'm really starting to feel pretty despondent about all this and for the first time don't really see the light at the end of the tunnel. I really do see a childless future. Strangely it's not in a crying, emotional mess kind of way just a cold, impassive view of things.

+euro just seen john the 'wak manager' I have been so busy I haven't had a chance to look at my emails to see if the clinic suggest anyrthing, work is crazy right now, thank goodness it is the weekend, my level was ok but last time it was 34 right from the off, althougfh I did have spotting then, i'm just worrying about every pain I feel

Happy Bank Holidays! I'm just getting my strop on over on the if marriage isn't about children what is it for thread. I don't usually do that and the op is being a tool so I'm not sure why I'm bothering.

Anyway..

buzzy I know not about prog values but I do know that you must be feeling anxious which is the pits. It never ends does it? I omit the knowledge I have that a bfp is just the first rung on the ladder of worrying about my baby til the day I bite the dust. I know that when I read that people are spotting in early preg I just think it is normal as it seems so common and is normally nothing to worry about. But I know if I had spotting I would be sick with concern. It really isn't on that long term ttcers have to have any of this. Also, your doctor was a dick.

lemon yay for the good iui. Fingers crossed for a pre-ivf ironadiff.

pout Your post is sad but sums up exactly how I feel too.But - we just don't know what is around the corner. Which is perhaps a big chunk of the problem. I am sorry for the fet delay and sinusitis is rotten. I am cheering you on and giving you a luff. Lots of the journey still to go. Have a sit down with me and a salted caramel brownie.

den Kate Garraway and Zita made prize fools of themselves. It was quite pleasing to watch it all fizzle out like a wet firework. But that is because MN is full of spite, not because it is a misogynist ill-conceived cynical money grabbing ploy. Aren't I an arsey pants today?!

critter I am bright green with sunshine Florida envy! It is pleasant icy gales here.

euro the acid sounded ouchy but glad it is all done and looked OK. Another very brave thing to add to the list.

sar the throwing up sounds not fun at all. Hope you are being well looked after and are getting windows of respite from it. And gin but blooming is a coming, promise!

zip sorry about af. How long are you clomid-ing for?

sea wave. I can't remember what is happening with your treatment? Fertility Friend is good for charting. It is quite useful. H can now tell when my temp has gone up by hugging me in the morning and when it drops.He is never wrong! I think we have been at this a bit too long now.

madness there isn't a post from you on this page. How goes it?

And how are our bumps? Do tell.

I have precisely no news. I am a grumpy for no reason old barrener. At some point I might have me some sperm put near a tube or an egg popped in a dish. When that might be is anyones guess!

Buzzy what my garble translates as it that everything will be OK, i feel it in my magical fertility waters (ladygee, sar, kitty, art!)

that thread was deleted. I never saw that happen before!

rabbit probably best they did delete it, I take there is no news from PALS

lemon hopefully you won't need to move on IVF

mrsd did you get to the GP

nelly I hope you are ok

pout I'm sorry you feel like this, its crap all of it, but I have a great feeling about Colin

Kayla is being a right monkey pain in the arse right now

Evening all,

I am still around rabbit just a busy week and this cold won't shift. I saw that thread and thought that the op must have been sh*t stirring. She seemed to be being particularly provocative. Deleting a whole thread is a pretty strong response!

Not sure what sinusitis is pout but if it involves a really sore forehead and the inability to bend down without shooting pains in my head, then perhaps that is what I have as well?? Really sorry that you're feeling low. I am not crying much just now either, I really can't imagine future IVF attempts being successful and I feel pretty numb about that. I am looking more seriously at adoption but I don't know how it will actually feel to know that I have exhausted my attempts at assisted conception and am closing that chapter of my life. I might not feel so numb then.....

Buzzy I hope that Kayla is doing a good job of distracting you from your worries. I can only imagine how stressful this must be. I have everything crossed for you and every faith that you and your bean will be okay.

sar I can't believe that you are almost at the end of the first trimester! Those sicky feelings will soon be banished.

mrsd did you make it to the doctor? I totally understand wanting to avoid more examinations but I know from bitter experience that putting it off just means suffering for longer when some antibiotics could clear it up really quickly.

nelly hope you were out enjoying the sun today. A bit cool but lovely just the same. I spent most of the day in bed with lemsip but we have a lovely sunny bedroom so I stayed up there to take advantage of it. I'm still around for a drink after a few days when I am less likely to give you the lurgy if you are less manically busy these days xx

Big waves to everyone - and there are many - that I have missed. I really am rubbish at keeping up with everyone.

buzz Mr euro was pleased to know that his moniker for John has kept going!

I must dash off for a shower as I'm meeting friends for brunch shortly. I've been busy this morning, baking chocolate muffins, so Mr euro is going to have a lovely surprise when he wakes up this morning. :)

Euro yay for all the ewcm that's always a good sign.

Lemon thank goodness you no longer share an office with your colleague, I can't imagine anything worse bleuch

Pout at the MIL comment. My jaw literally flapped open when I read it I'm sorry too that your mum shared when she didn't have the right. That sucks. It's the pity that I'm most fearful off. I have a hard enough time keeping my own mental shit together without having my sadness reflected back in the faces of everyone around me. On your impassive frame of mind - I think I feel differently about my infertility from day to day. I think sometimes feeling nothing is a healthy way to give yourself a break from all the emotions. You have a bit of a gap before FET and your emotions are having a holiday. It's self preservation. I hope you feel brighter and more optimistic the closer you get to FET (and Colin!).
I at you accidentally drugging your dogs. I have a cat so I'm totally safe. He might pull his party trick and pretend to swallow it when it's really in a soggy mess behind his left paw...

Rabbit it's the not knowing what's around the corner that gets me the most too. I had to Some sperm near a tube madam? Lovely, would you like a side of fannycandle?

Buzzy glad Kayla is distracting you too. Do you get an early scan soon?

Mad sorry you've got the lurgy. A few of my colleagues have been sick recently and they've had it for weeks! Looks awful. We have a sun trap bedroom too and rubbish curtains so I'm always woken up really early. Have you thought about the 'new' IVF imaging thing EEVA that's been in the news recently? I've just started looking into it but as long as you've got a few embryos to choose from it seems to increase your odds to more like 75% success instead of just Ivf which is 20%? Although one clinic said that women under 36 going through their 1st treatment cycle are unlikely to get a higher success rate but everyone else (older or on their 2nd attempt?) are 'likely to have tangible benefits'. 75% sounds great but this last statement less so. It's a minefield though I'm so sorry your ivf failed, was it your first? I hear people say it's a 3 cycle process.... I wouldn't even mind if that was the case but it came with a guarantee! It's the not knowing that's rubbish. Anyway I hope you feel better soon

Waves to everyone I've missed. It's sunny outside and I'm 'Scottish pale' (I'm sure that's on a paint chart somewhere!) so I'm off out to play

Ooh X post Euro yummy on the chocolate muffins! Enjoy your brunch

Ha zippy a needle on ice for the lady? Nervous telephone wait amuse bouche? The assisted conception menu of delights.

Madness sorry you have got the lurgy. I'm sending my strongest hot toddy prescription.

Euro - I demand a muffin.

why do people feel a need to lay the blame at someones feet pout your MIL is way out of line with that comment, I do wonder how many people MIL has spoken to about it but Barry did tell her that we weren't mentioning IVF outside of family, which made me considering I have over shared that info, perhaps because I say DE IVF most people presume its my problem

euro oooh I wouldn't say no to a muffin or two Mr Euro is a lucky man,

zippy depending on this afternoon will depend on when I get a scan, I'm booked in for next Fri so far, that EEVA thing is used at another clinic in Brno and they didn't give such high odds, although I think its great and would have considered it I think they need a bit more research into it as they supposedly have only tested it on 88 embryos

madness there are lots of nasty lurgees out there, I seem to miss all these interesting threads, I usually lurk on AIBU and relationships don't judge me, I don't watch SOAPs so need a bit of scandal in my life

lemon when is testing day

The joy of living and working in the same area is I don't have to travel far, the bad side is you bump into colleagues at the hospital I'm hoping to get my results this afternoon

There are enough muffins to share, but you'll need to be quick!

buzz I find relationships depressing - there are so many utter twats out there. Are you having another blood test today?

euro I had a blood test this morning but it leaked so back at hospital waiting for another like I haven't been stabbed enought this week

Oh bloody hell buzz. How irritating!