TTC after MC - nice people in crap times, full of posifrickingtivity

[WillSantaComeAgain]

Welcome aboard ladies (though obviously sorry you have to be here). We're a friendly bunch so come in and plump up a cushion for POAS Fridays and lots of posifrickingtivity. With a few (gentle) fish slaps thrown in for good measure.

OMG santa losing 3 stones is AMAZING. well done you.
Agree with pushing on with training, but don't go too crazy. Try to keep up the miles on your long runs but let your speed drop off if you are feeling too exhausted.

All that talk of running is making me want to start again - I've been meaning to do the C25K, but every time I'd plucked up the resolve, I fell pg... So maybe now's the time? Really need to start exercising again and watch what I eat, the weight has been creeping up again.

Had my follow-up scan today. Everything is as it should be - no retained tissue, nice thin endometrial lining, no signs of infection. In the circumstances, this is how it should be, but I still feel sad, tearful and heartbroken

Ttc and mc are such rollercoasters, no matter how much you try and steel yourself, nothing can cushion the blows when you fall down again from that emotional high after getting a BFP. Or the disappointment when af arrives again.

I've been thinking of maybe taking a break from it all... But I don't think I will, I really can't afford to lose too much time at my age (I'm 41). But the thought of ttc again, the stress and waiting, the worry that will now come with every BFP - I'm dreading it, tbh.

jbrd it's definitely a roller coaster for me too. I already felt I couldn't afford to lose anytime at 38 (turning 39 later this year). I can't help but think it would be easier to take if I was 28. But I know I'm being stupid and I probably find it just as hard emotionally if I were 10 years younger.

The first thing I made my mind up when I mc was to exercise again. I felt horrible I couldn't fit into my jeans by week 9/10. I know I was still in them at nearly week 20 last time. I know it's good for me to keep exercising when pg, and that you shouldn't start any exercise regime while pregnant. So it's basically the best time to start for me. Then I should be able to continue until I needed to switch to antenatal exercise classes (which is probably third trimester). I really want to feel as fit as I was last time, instead of being a pear. I know I couldn't stop the eating when I do fall pg. So it has to be exercise to keep the weight down.

Saggy thinking of you and fingers crossed its just too early to test

OLTT and jbrd I feel the same - waiting for AF still after erpc and thinking its due end of next week - that will be 10 weeks!!! Anyway I'm petrified of ttc again - the emotional roller coaster really takes it toll - I'm also 38 and worried it will take a long term

I'm going to go for a run / walk this weekend and some yoga or Pilates to lift my mood and I'm also so bloated - hoping that's mostly to do with the fact that I've had to wait for AF and not just to do with all comfort eating I've been doing.... X

Congrats Santa! X

I just bought myself a heart rate monitors on ebay. Why are they so cheap? It costs only £5.95 with free postage. I'm hoping it can tell me more accurately how many calories I've burned while exercising. Hopefully I didn't just purchased a piece of junk!

Congratulations Santa xx fab news.

Saggy all hope is not lost yet. I think the poas is v hit and miss. Keeping fingers crossed for you xxxx

Big hug to Jbrd, it is quite distressing to know that you are completely empty after a miscarriage, but at least you are physically healing and hopefully will find yourself in a good mental place soon about starting again. I too feel like I'm getting on a bit (38 next month and no children yet) so totally understand the conflicting emotions you are experiencing. From reading earlier posts it sounds like there are lots of us at a similar age, so can do lots of sympathetic hand-holding.

Saggy that's just rubbish for you. I hope this limbo position you are in resolves itself soon.

Congrats Santa and saggy as others have said its not over yet.

So I've just caved in and ordered a cbfm as I have no luck with opks and want to find out if and when I am ovulating as due to 10 weeks to first af and now 7 weeks and no 2nd af I need to know what's going on. Read that you can't start using it until cd1. Is that right?

Congrats Santa :)

Saggy I had the same a few cycles back. Just could not understand what was going on. Hope you get a nice bfp and not a visit from the witch.

How old are others?? I am 39 and ttc #2 (but #1 with new partner). Have a 10 yo ds with evil ex. I swing from being excited and optimistic about it to being very ambivalent... BF will make (has made to my ds!) a fantastic dad but I am worried about the baby days again, especially 10 years on...

Congrats Santa :)

Saggy I had the same a few cycles back. Just could not understand what was going on. Hope you get a nice bfp and not a visit from the witch.

How old are others?? I am 39 and ttc #2 (but #1 with new partner). Have a 10 yo ds with evil ex. I swing from being excited and optimistic about it to being very ambivalent... BF will make (has made to my ds!) a fantastic dad but I am worried about the baby days again, especially 10 years on...

Santa I am so sorry! I was so immersed in misery this morning I missed your BFP! Glum as I am I take each and every one we get personally! Its almost like we all get them together!
Thanks to everyone for the words of encouragement. You are all right, its not over yet! I still dont see how I can feel this rough and not be upduffed! I have booked a provisional Drs appointment for monday, if AF doesnt appear Im going to demand a blood test, if it does appear then I will cancel.
Im so glad we are all here for each other, sympathetic ears are so important. Im going to work extra hard this week to do my bit. {{{hug}}}

Great news santa! Let's hope this is the start of a whole load of BFPs.

Sorry about limbo land saggy it is torture, we are all willing you on.

Hugs to jbrd. It's such a horrid time.
liesl and emki, that limbo land that you're in must be so hard to stand. as a positive story, a friend of mine had the same issue and did get pg before af ever came...
Purple I'm 34. Got dd who is 20 months and I'm a bit nervous of going back to the baby days, so can't imagine what it would be like 10 years on! We've only been sleeping through the night (mostly) since Xmas and it seems a bit daunting to be thinking of going back to 2 hourly feeds... Still gotta lot of sleep to catch up on . Imagine it must be 100000x more daunting for you. And you too saggy! Hats off to you both.

Awwwww saggy that's sooooo disheartening ;( definitely retest in a few days, try to remember that early testing is only 50% accurate abd it states so on the CBD packaging, it may just simply be that the hormone levels aren't strong enough yet, or you may have diluted your urine if it wasnt the first of the day etc etc.....try to stay positive...easier says than done I know xxxxx

Congratulations Santa!!! That's fabulous news!!!! Fingers crossed for sticky bean xxxxx

Liesl you have to start using CBFM at the beginning of your cycle but any day 1-5 is ok.

So I picked up my stepdaughter for the weekend, and her mum has just had a baby. Every time I see her she asks a variation on the same question: 'Sooo.... When are you going to get started?'

Is this normal behaviour or completely unreasonable? Why is she so obsessed with my procreation (or lack thereof?)

And one week post-miscarriage, I think I did rather well to laugh it off and say 'I'm really not broody, thanks' .

:(

I think you did too - none of her business - it's just a question you don't ask - you did very well - I'd have smacked her or burst into tears!

Think AF due end of this week - seeing as this the first since erpc 10 wks ago is it normal that I've been either close to tears or just crying for the last 3 days..... I'm just so frigging depressed today - I'm marking and can't concentrate just to want cry - obviously I am depressed but is this also my hormones pmt? Anyone else have this or should I get myself sectioned? X

Ariel someone did that to me. I replied "actually I've just had a MC and would rather not talk about it!" That shut them up sharpish! [wry smile]
Emki it's normal for you! I'm about 10 weeks down the line and had a terrible few days last week. I'm sure it's just our hormones settling down. Just try and roll with it. I think a good cry when you need it doesn't do any harm. {{{hug}}}

Thank you saggy - feel relieved - yes a good cry does release all that tension - thinking of you and hoping AF stays away for you x

I've been so tempted to say something similar saggy but never quite had the nerve!

I had to have a cd1 scan yesterday cos of the possible cyst they saw at my last follicle tracking scan. Unfortunately it's still there it's not harmful but in the way so it makes it more difficult to conceive and they won't let me continue with clomid until its gone. So they gave me the choice of going on the pill for a month or just going natural for the month and see if it disappears on its own. We've decided to hope it goes away on its own as I don't want to count myself out completely this month. So who knows what's going to happen feels like every way I turn something gets in the way!

So been googling how to get rid of cysts naturally today and looks like just eating really healthily is the main way so going to try and eat loads more fruit and veg, drink loads of water and also trying bathing in Epsom salts!

Hope everyone's having a good weekend :)

I wouldn't put myself out of the game entirely either!
I wouldn't say it was a good weekend, I'm standing on a market stall and it's sunny and pouring by turns. I'm freezing and slightly moist! I suppose one bonus is that it isn't snowing!!

Hugs for Emki - I'm sorry you are feeling depressed today. I've heard that the PMT for the first period following MC can be savage, coupled with feeling depressed anyway and I expect your hormones are raging.

Yes I was dreading dealing with her, as I try very hard to get on with her for her daughter's (and hence our) well being and for an easy life. The last thing I want to do is reveal anything about our private life, as that's what she is desperate for! Lucky I was feeling quite stable...

I think I'm going to take a leaf out of Saggy's book and start saying to people "yes we'd love another baby but all we have is miscarriages" just to shut them up. It's an insensitive question for so many people, it shouldn't be ok to just drop it into a chat about the weather!

I get asked all the time when we are having another - they normal tell me how much DS would love a sibling (like I don't bloomin know that!!) or how I'm 30 next year so need to get my skates on. I used up smile politely however now I tell them - I had a miscarriage in feb - they don't ask again!! Xx

Safely arrived on what was supposed to be my baby moon in Rome. Made the most of not being pregnant at dinner & ate all foods I wouldn't have been allowed if I was and washed them down with a fab bottle of wine. Think ov is due any day now so will be plenty of dtd while we're here so fingers crossed!