Right, that's it! Fabulous Forty Somethings ttc want our bfp's and we want them now! We have waited long enough!

[hopefulgum]

Here's our shiney new thread. The one where I finally get upduffed with everyone else!

Just thinking...we are due some bfp's. Who is up for testing next???

Always happy to POAS but as I haven't even ovulated yet so it can't be me....

oh CaliBee I'm not up for testing I'm afraid. Cd 11 here and temp has dropped this morning. It's still above the coverline but if I was pregnant it wouldn't be dropping at this point so I think it's game over for me this month. I'm fully expecting AF to arrive sometime in the next few days. Sometimes I feel like it's just not going to happen for me now.
Sounds like you're having a tough time at work but just keep thinking of that moment when you hand your notice in and disappear off to Ireland!
We had a very small wedding too,just our families and a few friends in church.We didn't have a cake either (though I had a simple bouquet of flowers) . The most important thing is the two of you making a commitment to each other, I'm sure it will be just perfect!
Mozzarella so sorry to hear AF arrived, it does bring back all sorts of feelings and emotions. It can't be pleasant to have to consider working full time when you wanted to be part time, but teenagers can be ok you know(I've got two!). I hope you get a job that suits you, and can then leave it to go on maternity leave very soon!
gum I love going to the hairdressers too. It helps that the hairdresser is a friend. Her DS and my DD2 were very friendly at preschool(engaged to be married when they were 4!) so we were nearly mothers in law together ,though now they are at different schools and he's too interested in football to play with girls. Still it may all change when they get older.(DD has told me she still thinks he's '"fit" !) My friend has had two miscarriages before her DCs and was really supportive when I had mine so we became closer then. It's lovely to sit down for a couple of hours drinking tea, reading magazines ,chatting and being pampered!
I'm following your shagfest exploits with interest, you're an inspiration to us all!
Glad to hear you recovered so quickly green !
notsoold ,thinking you you for tomorrow, let us know how you get on x

Oh Irish that is a horrid feeling and I confess to it being a big thing in my mind too. I have days where I really can't see a baby as ever being a reality

Evening, ladies, just popping in quickly to see how you all are! Hope you are all staying optimistic for your BFPs...in spite of the setbacks.

Cali Your work sounds vile, not a good place to be in. Hope you can distract yourself with your wedding, and then with the thought of handing in your notice! When's the wedding day again, remind me? Sounds as if you're in full blown preparation mode.
If I could, I'd make you a wedding cake, I love cake decorating!

greenlizard Glad you're feeling better, that must have been a nasty bug you had. I've had food poisoning like that one, it came on within an hour after eating. Not nice! But you seem to have shaken it in good time

notsoold I can completely understand where you're coming from - once you know what can happen, you can never really relax! Wishing you a strong heartbeat in your scan tomorrow!

Had my last day in my old job today, so relieved. I almost skipped out of the door
However, I've not been able to enjoy the day completely, as I have had some spotting during the day Not a lot, and brown, but I can't help worrying - this is exactly how it started with my mc, even down to the timing, just under 8 weeks. Trying hard not to freak out right now.
We're at SIL's wedding tomorrow until Saturday, so nothing can be done right now... I've resigned myself to wait & see what happens - nothing could be done right now anyway that could reassure me, so I will need to sit it out. Sigh.

Sorry for not more name-checking Good luck to whoever with poas next!

Oh wow, so much going on here. Phew, I apologise in advance if I don't namecheck everyone. I was up later than usual this morning (all this shagging is wearing me out)

jbrd, sorry to hear about the spotting. You have heard it all before, it is likely to be nothing, but I do understand how worrying it can be. Can you get a scan early next week?

Mozzamama, I am sorry about AF turning up. I fully understand how all the feelings of grief and sadness can resurface. Sending love your way ((hugs)). As for working full-time, that is a bummer. I work 4 days a week and would much prefer two or three. However, I have to work 4 for the money. I am a teacher too, I teach teenagers and honestly, most of them are really lovely. There's one or two that need a bit of discipline, but for the most part that aren't as scary as they seem. What do you teach?

notsoold, let us know how the scan goes.

calibee, I do hope you get the pleasure of handing in your notice. Your boss sounds like a right bitch.

I know how you and irish feel. Some days it is difficult to remain optimistic. For me, I know fully well that if this doesn't happen naturally, then it won't happen. In some ways that makes it easier to accept,but in other ways, I just wish I had money, time and an enthusiastic hubby to throw at the problem and I'd be having IVF with donor eggs in a flash. I guess that would bring a whole new set of stress into my life, so I just have to try to accept what is and keep trying without letting it get to me.

Having said that I am probably going to be overly optimistic this month due to the shagathon. Which is foolish, because if it is a case of crap eggs it really doesn't make a spot of difference how much sperm I throw at it

So, last night was night 6 of the shagathon, one night to go! I had acupuncture late yesterday and she said,"let's open everything up" (for ttc) and as I walking around the supermarket an hour later I had the most massive ovulation pain. Ouch. I was thinking, "there's no way I could have sex when I feel like this". Fortunately the pain had subsided by the time we went to bed. My temperature is up this morning, so I guess I really did ovulate sometime yesterday.

I shall try to remain calm and hopeful

I had better run, still haven't had breakfast, DS isn't dressed or fed, and I have to leave for work in an hour-gasp!

Oh jbrd like Gum says its very probably nothing but I can understand you must be worried. I hope it eases off and comes to nothing.

Date is set for 1st June....there isnt really much more to do as it really was as simple as sorting dress, hair, food and ceremony. I'm not sending out invites I will just text the time and place to those who are coming. I am sure at some point somebody will have something to say about my lack of motivation....but hey

Morning . I have been reading but have been pretty poorly this last week with cruel reappearance of sickness after it had seemed to calm down last week. Not too bad this morning - def on way out!
jbrd I know how you must be feeling, but there really is every hope. I had spotting (well, bleeding, and not just brown) at 8 weeks after an 8 week mc that started exactly the same (had epu scan pre-booked). I was convinced it must be another mc but all was well. 7-8 wks is such a common time to have spotting. Will be thinking of you xxx
notsoold good luck for today! What time is your scan?
calibee I think you have the perfect approach to planning your wedding, and totally acceptable to not have formal invites. Plus you know the texts arrived!
gum wow what super timing! Will you carry on for one more day? Has dh even asked about time of month etc? Whatever the outcome this month, you really couldn't have done any more
Better get dressed - mw from hell has finally got around to make me a booking in apt (12 weeks today) while tutting on the phone that their target is 10 weeks. She has had my info' since 8 weeks ...
Love to all xxx

Morning

Good luck at your scan notsoold - let us know how you get on? Everything crossable is....

Calibee your boss sounds like a right doughnut. Just let the thought of you handing your notice carry you through the tough times and spare a thought for the colleagues you are leaving behind (except the horrible one obviously!) I have reported for cheerleading duties....pom poms a-shaking! G-O-O-V-A-R-I-E-S (ps. tell me about your dress?)

Irish sorry AF looks like it is rearing her head. It is rubbish

mozzarella sorry you're feeling blue too. I have never been in your position but know it must be heartbreaking. I have nothing useful to say really, but I know when you really allow yourself to feel loss (even when it's painful) it helps you heal. Hope you feel better soon.

Well I am Confused of London. Today my temp shot up (maybe in sympathy because I seem to be weirdly linked to hopeful!) but I got my first peak on CBFM and another +ve OPK (3rd day in a row!) DP is back tonight so it's SWI over the whole weekend to make sure that whenever that egg decides to pop out we catch it....hoping my temp spike was just a blip.

Good luck with number seven hopeful anything planned for the finale??

Crossed posts with diege glad to hear sickness seems to be getting better. Hope all goes well with MW - she sounds like a gem

green, I am wondering if there will be a number 7! I certainly don't have anything planned for the finale - perhaps sex whilst snoozing?? I felt very sleepy all day today. In fact I even bought a ready made lasagne for the kids dinner, which is not like me at all. I always make food from scratch.

deige, I know I should carry on for one more day - I want to get a gold star on Fertility Friend but, honestly, I feel like I am running out of steam! We shall see if I can manage it tonight, let alone for an 8th day.

Green, have you have three days of + opk's before? I reckon your ovaries are getting ready to pop out a massive big healthy egg, or perhaps two or three???

I have got everything crossed that you and I can be preggo buddies and mamas together.

notsoold, I hope you have wonderful news at your scan today.

Hello all lovely ladies,

I have a stash of cheap but reliable Internet opk strips and also a clear blue ovulation kit with two unopened tests. Along with your advice and support They brought me luck - dd2 born last week and I am 41.

If anybody would like them just pm me with your address and I'll post them to you.

Good luck everyone xxxx

Hi everyone < waves>

Everything went really well today at the scan.
Baby is growing, heart is beating and nt 1.4mm

So happy!!! Going to celebrate having lunch!!! Thank you, oh thank you all for holding my hand, for giving me support and for being here for me!!!

gum, green, Irishmummy ,... notsoold ..thanks for your supportive words! .. I'm feeling better today.. ...notsoold I hope everything is fine today with your scan!
sparkly how is your DH behaving at the momenti?
gum I didn't start to teach yet.. I had a public exam to become teacher in 1999 and I got the job now,14 years after.. this is the crazy Italian way.. I should teach physics to 14-15 years old students in vocational schools.. The problem is:
a) I forgot all the physics I studied in the university because I never worked with physics..
b) I'm a little worried about behavioural issues..
However I still think it's a good chance and it could turn out to be much more amusing and useful than what I do now (statisitcs and data management for a local health agency)
If I managed to get pregant soon, I could study physics during maternity leave.. just one more good reason!!!

Somewhere becomingrain......such lovely news. Congratulations.
Notsoold...i'm so pleased all went well for you x

Hi Mozzarella, just a quick message about teaching teenagers. I've taught Spanish teenagers, and I imagine they're probably similar. You need to find a way to motivate them and encourage learner autonomy, they're at an age where they have to study for themselves as much as you can teach them too. Some of the nicest classes I have had were with teenagers, but they can be hard work too. Be consistent in how you treat them, so they know where they stand and what's acceptable behaviour in your class. They generally have strong feelings about what is right or wrong. Good luck and hope you feel a bit better soon. xx

Congratulations Somewhere, that's wonderful news. You must be on cloud nine!

Notsoold, so, so happy for you. Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy - all will be well.

Deige, although I thought DH wasn't being suspicious, with the 7 days of shagging, last night I said,"I don't feel like doing the 7th day, you ok with that?", he laughed and said he was fine, then he said something like,"what's this all about, anyway?", My response was, "What do you mean? It was just after seeing the thing on the telly", and he said,"you aren't trying to have a baby or something are you?". Talk about awkward moment....I said,"we have already been through this. I just wanted to see if it would make us feel closer,how it would affect our relationship," which was my way of avoiding that conversation. (It has, actually made us feel closer,and certainly upped the "happy" factor for both of us)
However, my feeling is that he was happy enough to have sex every night for 7 days, so it is a bit late asking after the fact I still maintain that the chance is so slim, I have told him the truth - that it would be a miracle and I would still like that miracle - but the idea,for him of actually trying is a problem. So I maintain that I am not ttc, and that if I get pregnant, it was just lucky.

I know to many that would sound like I am being dishonest. And yes, I suppose I am, but there is a very grey area in our relationship over this. He doesn't know about the last pregnancy (miscarried very early at 5 weeks), but with the other two miscarriages he said he didn't want to try again, but when I got pregnant, both times,after the initial surprise, he was fine. Does that make me deceptive? I guess for some it would seem so.

We all have to do what feels right for us,and in my situation, this does feel right otherwise I wouldn't carry on.

Anyway, I already have the bloody post ovulation symptoms coming on. I know they mean nothing, so I am trying,trying,trying to ignore them!

At last I am getting my hair done today (should I be worried about colouring my hair at 2DPO?), and looking forward to a nice night out. I plan to get dressed up with my nice freshly blow dried hair. I may even have a glass or two of champas.

at good news somewhere and notsoold

Hi girls. Back from the salon and I've popped a picture on my profile if you want to have a look.(just hover over my name).

Many congrats somewhere! Wow your pregnancy seems to have gone very fast!
Gum your hair looks gorgeous . You suit your curls too, you lucky thing - in fact you remind me of that actress Nadia someone or other . Not much help there then!
Re: dh actions speak louder than words and he is not acting like a man running scared He's a grown up, he knows what might happen when you have unprotected sex, so I'd say you were off the hook morally.
Had a phone call from fetal medicine centre yesterday asking me if I could change the time of my appointment on weds (cue paranoia that the harmony test had revealed something 'bad' before chastising self that this was a ridiculous conclusion to jump to from an appointment time change..) I think I have been so anxious about 'tests', travel arrangements etc etc that even a trivial time change disrupts my thinking and gets my mid spinning.... Have to be there for 10.30 rather than 12.15 which means an extra £100 on train ticket , so a bit cross...Will be glad when weds is over...Oh and mw ok yesterday - just one dig about larger families but didn't even respond and just let her go on to herself...
Wondering how the scan went notsoold? Hoping all is well xxx

Sorry just seen your post notsoold Brilliant news !

Hi

notsoold that is fabulous news! Oh, I bet you feel so relieved and hope enjoyed your celebratory lunch.

hopeful liking the hair lady ? how long does it stay smooth like that for? I found a couple of grey hairs (well my very kind DSC found a couple of grey hairs by saying ?why have you got some blond hair at the front? ! Couldn't understand why I leapt up and spent 20 mins pulling faces in the mirror ? I know I am lucky to have got away with it for so long but frankly it was quite depressing . Not be long before I have to start colouring it? Hope you enjoy tonight and a couple of glasses of champers will not do you or baby-in-waiting any harm whilst its on manoeuvres!

Right need your help ladies with preparing for our appointment at the Fertility Clinic on Monday morning.

Just been reviewing my test results and think that they are ok? (TSH 2.83 mU/L, Prolactin 261mU/L, LH 4IU/L, FSH 6IU/L and Progesterone 38) I am trying to work out what I want to ask (DP helpfully suggested we ask for a baby - hilarious).

I ovulate every cycle (I think) my cycle length is regular with an luteal phase of ok length (13/14 days ? well apart from one freaky cycle in Jan where I O?d on day 10 and had a luteal phase of 10).

I will take along copies of all my test results and temperature charts on the off chance they are interested or will dismiss temping out of hand as witchcraft nonsense!

I thought of asking about the AMH test (worth doing ? what would it show? Is it an accurate gauge of egg quality/ovarian reserve?)

What are the possible next steps (assuming all my tests are normal) (ICI, ICSI, IVF)?

Would clomid be of any help if I am regularly ovulating?

Are the chances of conceiving with reproductive assistance additive to conceiving naturally at our age?

Am I missing anything else? What would you advise me to ask (or anything you have always wanted to ask)? (*morien is your appointment on 17th?)

Thanks!

ps. diege sure there will nothing cladestine about the changing of appointment times but how frustrating it will cost you so much extra! Hope it goes well (sure it will.......)x

Congratulations Somewhere and welcome to the world babySomewhere !
Great news about your scan notsoold ,you can relax a bit now.
gum I can't believe how young you look in your photos. Your hair looks great,hope you had a good night out and enjoyed your champagne!
I agree with Diege re your DH, he knows you want a baby, he knows you're not using contraception and knows what the possible outcome may be so when (not if!) it does happen he can't say it was a deception.
JBrd hope your spotting settled down and everything's ok.
green I got my first grey hair years earlier than you! I've not got a lot but my hair is very dark so they show up against the brown and I have to regularly have them disguised by my good friend the hairdresser.
I had an AMH test last year after my first miscarriage, I was told it was a good indicator of ovarian reserve, I don't know if it's any indicator of egg quality. I was told my result was low but very good for someone of my age.However I then went on to have two more miscarriages and no further pregnancies since we started trying again in October, despite Fertility Friend saying chances have been good or high every cycle. I wonder if I had it retested would it have dropped a lot over the last 12 mths.
There's quite a lot of debate as to whether clomid may help older women if they are ovulating anyway, it will be interesting to hear what the consultant says,you'll have to fill us in after you've been.
Hi to nobeer and everyone else.

Afternoon all.
Wowgum you look lovely and I agree, so very young. I agree with others, DP is a big man, he knows what happens when he has unprotected sex....lets face it he has 5 some notso little lovelies to remind him. I sometimes think men choose to not face reality so that they can blame others when reality hits.
green I had grey hairs in my 20's so have been dying it ever since. Just to add that AMH is not an indicator of egg quality. Infact I would be very surprised if there was a test that did so without some sort of invasive poking around or egg retrieval.
I just waved DP off at the station (after a mad dash back home for his wallet he caught the train with seconds to spare!!) and thats it now, I wont see him for 4 weeks :(. Feeling very sad. I seem to have had some ewcm and my cheapie opk have had equal blue lines both today and yesterday...however the clearblue smiley has not smiled at me :(. I am crossing every digit on my body in the hope that ovulation is happening and little swimmies will be in place. Sadly however my lack of trust in my body of late has got me assuming the worst and that I will have another anovulatory cycle.

Calibee, having equal blue lines is a very good indicator of the surge happening. I've got everything crossed that the egg is popped out asap.

Thank you for the compliments about how young I look. I"m often told that, but I think the computer camera is probably also a bit kind. And without the grey hair - what a difference. I think if I let my hair grow out,and not colour it for a while I'd have a shock at the grey. I notice it coming through more and more and just can't bear the idea of looking old yet. I'll be ready for grey hair when I am about 70

Sadly, looking young means nothing when it comes to the quality of my eggs . Even after the shagfest, I'd be really surprised if I get a bfp.Maybe every last one of my eggs is damaged in some way, and I'll be shagging all the way to menopause with no luck at all. It is a reality I have to face, but not one that I want to.

Having said that, this morning I dreamt that I was at the airport with my DS (4 yrs old) and I had left my passport at home (a 5 hour drive away). I was frantic. But the airline were really kind, gave me and DS premium economy seats and tickets to get into the zoo while we waited for my passport. They were so nice because I had a little baby bump. Clearly, this is wishful thinking. If I do get pregnant this cycle I would be a fifteen weeks (all going well) when we go on our trip in July.

Deige, I am sure the change of appointment has nothing to do with bad news, and it is just convenience for them. It's a pain that the train ticket is so expensive! At least you will have peace of mind after your appointment.

Green, the AMH is a relatively new test that gauges the reserve of your eggs. However it isn't always accurate and it may make you worry (like my test result did), mine is "very low" which was devastating at first, but then I surfed the net to find that many women with the same results end up pregnant. Some fertility clinics must have an amh result to have treatment, others don't, and gauge fertility through FSH and estrogen levels.

I am looking forward to hearing what they say at your appointment. Take notes, then report back to us