Elderberry Pavlovas And The Eternal Sausage of Wang (Part 4): a frightfully good thread for the over-30s TTC their first baby.

[viviennewestwould]

Over here, sausage-wangers!

Holidays def are very very at boosting any slow sex lives! All that sun I think!

Man we need another holiday! I just keep thinking we might need to save our cash for IVF..

Holidays are an utter luxury but you have to wonder if all the sun and relaxation helps?! We booked a villa with solmar villas in Spain last year half price - was a total bargain and a fab wee place

Holidays don't necessarily help with me ttc as we're usually in a campervan... Managed to keep up DTD last summer, but have to say it was more of an effort when you know the bathroom and showers etc are on the other side of the campsite. Oh, and you've got the dog with you.....

I realise the thread has moved on a little, but merkin - sex every day?!

Yes at least every day. I am just married remember and it's mostly still fun!
Serious question if anyone can help or be bothered to trawl dr google. AF finished yesterday and today I feel like I am o'ing based on achey feeling. Have not started OPKs yet as far too early (normally O day20 currently day 5) but outside of this is it even possible???

I suspect that's unlikely, Merkin. Is it maybe just tail end of AF cramps? A quick google of ovulating on day 5 mostly throws up people saying no, not likely. However, there is this here: www.ivillage.com/forums/node/62192099

If it were me I'd be OPKing and examining my temps closely though!

There is NO WAY DH could cope with more than once a day!!! We do enjoy sex and don't see it as a chore (yet) but there is no way I'd find time to do it every day!

Soph, I've found myself thinking like that too, re: holidays. I've been dismissing the idea of holidays for the last year, but I've given in and now decided to sign up for as many as possible in the hope that the law of the sod will kick in and I won't be able to go on them!

I went in holiday, didn't work.

Hi Kerry!
Had to pop back in to say a big welcome I'm sure all the elderberries will be glad to welcome you to their gang
xx

[waves furiously at Janey and then remembers she has absolutely no fucking idea who she is]

Murkin, yes, sex every day is reportedly good for men who have sperm issues, however, if there is no male factor any fertility specialist would tell you to not have sex every day - every other day max. Fairy, I certainly didn't mean to denigrate your sexual appetites [jealous bitch emoticon] I just know from research that sex every day is not advised if there's nowt wrong with your other half's sperm.

On the other end of the spectrum, I believe there are squillions of women not getting pregnant simply because they're not having enough sex. Please don't start chucking sausages at me, me and DP have had some horrid experiences with his reluctant schlong and I empathise entirely, Bunny, with your situation. But, it's like I told my DP, if we don't have plentiful well-timed sex we may as well buy a fucking tortoise instead. I honestly could scream when I read about perfectly functioning boyfriends/husbands who are too 'tired' or 'ill' to have sex during the woman's fertile window. We wait all fucking month for this...the least they can do is man the fuck up. Do they want this baby or not?

Hi Kerry!
Gosh, I look away for a few hours and shiny NEW people arrive! So NEW and SHINY!
Sorry to hear about the blockage - is the other tube clear though? I was thinking about someone else I know who is very like you, who i knew to be having a similar operation recently and was wondering how it had gone..

Also thank you for the lovely IUI story.

Pls to forgive the ridiculous username - I'm being a hairy Victorian gent somewhere else so have dressed appropriately.

Still nothing useful to say re DH I'm afraid - the GP basically admitted she had no idea what the tests results meant and recommended he book for an appointment with the doc that does. DH wasn't on the ball enough to ask for copies of the results, and has now declared he's too stressed and tired to talk about it with me. His business has just gone under though, so not the best week for this kind of thing.

Can I have the wooden spoon booby (snigger..boobies) prize for worst shagger? We've done it once in the last 2 months. Down to work stress, as you can probably imagine..

I apologise for the profanities, I've just got back from the Spar..

Hi new people! the more, the merrier; we're all in the same boat; a problem shared is a problem divided, etc etc or any other combination of utterly insipid encouraging platitudes...EXCEPT:

RELAX

Gah do I hate it when people say that! As if everyone who ever got pregnant since the dawn of time was singing kumbayah while they conceived. Give me a break.

I just caught up with the thread, and apologize for not remembering who brought it up, but I completely relate to the overwhelming feelings of "why me" related to TTC. The only way I get through those days is just to give myself permission to wallow, and trust that the feeling won't be as intense the next day. Nothing wrong with feeling sad about what a beating the TTC thing is, or how unfair it is when it seems like the whole world is popping out baby after baby after baby. I like to pretend that all those pregnant ladies felt the same as we did at one point, and eventually our turns will come. for us all.

I really wanted to win that Lady Shagamatronic crown but 20 times in 21 days - dang! Not even my DH and I can top that. We're off for a dirty weekend tomorrow, ovulating around Sunday so am mentally preparing again for the subsequent 2ww.

Cap'n!!, hello love! I'm really sorry to hear about your husband's job, I know how hard he battled with that company and how it had become his life. Is he horribly devastated (stupid question)? What will he do next? Blimey, SA results pale into insignificance almost, don't they? I do hope things come together for you both (no pun intended, I swear). Captain, get your husband to ring the GP and ask for a copy of the results to be sent through the post I'll tell you what the fuck they mean

P.s..yep, the other tube is clear. I do believe the blocked one is merely jam-packed with two-and-a-half decades of spunk

As if everyone who ever got pregnant since the dawn of time was singing kumbayah while they conceived

Genius

kerry are you a fucking mind reader? Your new here yet claim know all about captains husband. I think you may be a freaky stalker

I'd say the recent spate of super shagging may quieten down somewhat! We've just been a bit mad recently! X

You're not your fucking pet hate yet I have just done it

(Quietly adds singing calming campfire songs to her list of things to try this month...)

Actually, sod that. I'm going to try 'Ging Gang Goolie'...whilst lying on my back with my legs in the air...and necking robitussin.

Boodle LOL
Kerry Actually we're both chuffing relieved it's over. It has been such a struggle, pouring all our money and time and energy into this ridiculous abyss much like ttc . (I say we, though it's not my company, but I've felt the strain on both sanity and bank balance)
It is sad though, and the end of an era. FX for brighter futures all round!
Great about the other tube, and fnnar about decades of ancient sperm. It's a bit like those stories about people sticking peas in their ears when small children and then the cause of their chronic deafness being discovered decades later.
OK, maybe nothing like that at all..

Crikey I pop out for a few hours and this thread goes mental, won't say much as I am knackered so heading to bedfordshire!

Been to see my best friend tonight, kind of puts things into perspective, I am stressing about TTC and she is having heart surgery on Saturday so my prayers will be for her the next few days rather than for myself asking for a baby.

Night y'all.

Aww, Bunny, hope your friend's surgery goes well.

Captain - that's like the bit in that story of the other Captain! (Corelli and his Mandolin) The old man with the pea stuck in his ear that he asks to be replaced when he hears his wife nagging him! On a more serious note, I'm glad you are feeling positive about a brighter future now.

Boodle aha, that's where I'd got that story from.. sieve memory..