Gather up your fertility spells and sign in for the lentil-weaving BESH woo hippy thread!

[FrankelSaysRelax]

Greetings sisters [puts flowers in hair]

Bring your very best woo & let's see if we can magick up a few baybees (insta-differs not allowed).

New recruits are required to locate the BESH spell aka the BESHtionnaire and submit for further scrutiny.

[dances round bare foot]

Arf at GP. GHJ still hasn't got over his...

MSB didn't half moan about his til I pointed put he did it in private whereas I had many people looking at my fanjo for the HSG and the dildo cam wasn't exactly pleasant! Oh and at some point that I may actually have to give birth....

God yes, they do one tiny thing in perfect privacy and then think their suffering is equal to hours of trekking around being peered and and poked and prodded and operated on.

AMNH is using his normal result as an excuse to refuse to cut back on alcohol and coffee ("But i don't need to! My results were fine!" It is VERY annoying.

Whereas MSB cut back after his first one, then when the second was only marginally better he went a bit mad with the booze in an in your face manner

How you feeling now sink?

Sorry to hear that Bugs - women like that make me cry.

I have been crying on and off all day. And yesterday evening. And I appreciate the irony after my badly timed assertion of yesterday that I don't tend to cry. SIL phoned yesterday and announced her second diffment. What she plans for she invariably gets and I can't bear it at the moment. I also know DS is TTC and it's only a matter of time. I can't actually bear the thought of Christmas - I can't bear it. Surrounded by the fertile and being the sad barren in the room.

I feel so incredibly hopeless. Needless to say, MrA thinks I am being silly and negative.

I wish I knew what to say, aries. Sadly, all I do know, from bitter experience, is that this sort of thing just makes you both crazy and inconsolable.

When I found those preg vitamins and a used but blank (but carefully saved!) pregnancy test in my sister's bag the other week... Seriously, I would walk down the road absolutely absorbed in black black fantasies about how she would lose it, or alarmingly vivid imaginings of a terrible fight we would have in which I would somehow assault her. I actually found myself quaking at the supposed moment of violence, I was feeling it so intently. It was pure rage. And mentalness.

I haven't managed to cure myself of it either, so sadly this is more a "I know what you're going through" post rather than a helpful advice one :(

Oh aries I'm sorry. I know that desperate feeling only too well

Like Norf says, I really don't know what the answer is, all I know is that letting myself have a mighty sob before attempting to pull myself together usually releases some pressure. HWHNN's mantra (and I admit he has a point) is that we can't stop other people from getting pregnant, all we can do is focus on us and our end goal.

Failing that, cake and chocolate.

Frank you put that very well. It's such a fucking unfair, hard slog that we're all on / have been through. These are the things that make me feel better slightly less worse:

Knowing I'm not alone & that there are other people who understand
Finally being closer to getting some treatment
Cake
NewDog
Hoping - we still have to hope

'Ello beatches. How's tricks? Have a missed the pity party? I hope not. I love a good wallow myself.

We don't seem to be a happy lot at the moment.

I'm just completely spaced out from jetlag. I'm in the US for work and so tired it feels kinda trippy. I am living on vast amounts of sugar and caffeine to get me through.

Droid is due tomorrow/Thursday. It'll arrive in the middle of my transatlantic flight, most probably. Meh. Must remember to pack drugs in handluggage.

Oh aries I totally understand. Have some cake. And a wailing sesh. I just did. Got two announcements, either side of what my due date would have been. I could not actually speak to the second one, a very close friend, who found it difficult to tell me, cos she knows about the MC and all the previous shit. We started trying when she was 12-weeks with her first child...

Welcome back euro, it's a misery pit in here... So mehness is much accepted!

I made myself one of those "cake in a mug" this evening, Using this recipe [yum]

I made blackberry cake. And ate almost all of it.

Ooh I wonder if that would work with guten free flour? I have all the ingredients..
Blackberry cake sounds delicious norf.

Do it right Norf, if you're going to get into the pit make sure you do so with a cocktail in hand and beckon over the nearest semi-naked young man to give you a neck massage

I think tomorrow's cake may have to be a chocolate cake.

www.channel4.com/4food/recipes/popular-ingredients/chocolate/el-tesoro-mousse-cake-recipe looks nice for gluten-free chocolate cake faif.

www.channel4.com/4food/recipes/popular-ingredients/chocolate/el-tesoro-mousse-cake-recipe

Howdy. Feeling bit better and managed to eat some toast this pm. Suspect just a useless cyst type thing.

Can't be arsed to bake, but have watched Australian Masterchef and Great British Bake-off. So it's almost like I have.

Must go. The attractive man needs my attentions.

Bastard bastard cats. I trod on a mouse this morning. In bare feet. And then had to stroke and praise the wretched cat which was hovering in pride and anticipation.

Good to hear you're feeling better, sink. Still feeling ok today?

Fucking cats. I was forever trreading on dismembered creatures. The highlight once was half a rabbit (back end).

NewDog decided to savage the bottom of my trousers this morning. He was growling & nipping. I was a bit scared!!

God, I am still feeling as bad as I ever have done in my entire life. My heart seems to be made of a lump of lead.