Hello
So quiet on here, where shall I weeble?! Well ill just blether on on my jack jones for a bit as no ones around to mind! 
Today I've reached my first milestone, I'm 4w6d,
& last time my test showed a BFN at 4w5d & I started miscarrying at 4w6d... I've been avidly and anxiously testing every morning and so far, still a definite dark BFP, so, I'm one hurdle down
but I darent
too much about it in RL as I'm finding it very hard to dare to believe, and not be doubtful.. Its very hard to try and be positive and hopeful, which is so disheartening, and slightly depressing, I'm just in this wierd state of limbo where times standing still, or at least moving incredibly slowly... I then feel bad for, as neeko drummed into me with Summers pregnancy, not 'having faith in my bean'.. 
Think cos we haven't had treatment (apart from usual aspirin & progesterone) it really is in the lap of the gods (for the religious amongst us, prayers appreciated please!) So not being able to pin our hopes on treatment being successful takes away some of the previous positivity. Having said that, I don't regret not doing it, it would of been the 5th time (twice before and during Summers, and then last 2 times that failed
) so it was no guarantee, and also needing to be done before 6w and now having the added factor of a possibility of a chemical pregnancy like last time ending at 5w, just wasn't feasible...
Anyway, warned you all Id blether on! Original weeble here! 