Rainbow babies- for all of us holding, pregnant with and trying for our rainbows. While remembering all our darling angels

[Moominsarescary]

Hoping the thread brings us luck and that soon we will all be holding our rainbows xx

Oh and we have mice, she's just given birth and NOWHERE sells traps, I cannot cope with hunt the dead smell that you have to do with poison EURGH

mech thinking of you, I hope today is gentle for you. But if its not hugs to you.

Hiya trickle - can't believe you've got 2 weeks to go, won't say 'only' as it sounds like it's dragging and sounds tough. Nearly there xxx

Mecha just popping on to say I am thinking of you and Dexter today, hope it's easy in you. Hugs x

mecha just wanted to send you my love for today xxx

and love to trickle too - goodness, so many difficult things happening at once (and mice on top of everything... never fun to deal with). I hope so much that things are somehow sorted before LO's arrival - and that he/she is giving you lots of reassuring/calming kicks in the meantime.

fan glad you're feeling a little better. Sounded just awful.
elly yes, as moomins said, enjoy yourselves!!

Has anyone heard from wtw, how are they all doing? I'm not on FB so wouldn't know if she had posted anything there...

poppet, wtw is fine from what fb updates say, lots of pics of H. She's a cutie.

trickle hi, wow two weeks left. Not long to go. All this heartache will soon be worth it.

Mech hope u re ok today? Xxx
Trickle hope the next 2 weeks fly by & u start to feel excited over your impending arrival ..xxx
Hope everyone's ok? Hot,hot,hot but fab to be the weekend xxx enjoy xxx

Trickl, wow 2 weeks left! I hope they fly past in an uneventful blur! I hope you get the other stuff sorted too. X

Hi ladies, thank you so much for all your lovely messages. Holly is just perfect, am feeling quite overwhelmed to actually have her here. Have been quite tired and tearful today though and feeling a lot of sadness for Erin. It's been very emotional. Did others feel the weight of their previous loss come flooding back strongly after the birth of their rainbow? It's a bit like I've been repressing my feelings about Erin just to get through the pregnancy and now I'm grieving for her all over again.

2 weeks trickle wow! Sounds like you're having a very stressful time though - hope some of it gets resolved before the birth.

Fan and Blizy my friends sounds like you've been having a rough time xx

Glad the stitch went well Moomins

Kleine thanks for asking after us At some point I will get round to adding a pic of Holly

I'm sorry I haven't read back very well so can't name check everyone but I'm thinking of you all and very grateful for all your support over the last few weeks xxx

I had & still do lots of conflicting emotions :happy,sad,relief , regret etc... Regularly still do. Also, your hormones are running wild at the moment which doesn t help... Again, in my experience what you re feeling is perfectly normal. Sure the others will agree with me? Enjoy Holly but go with the sadness also xxxxx

Hi all thank you xx much appriciated, this thread is a life line at times - brings a whole new meaning to the two week wait I think

I have traps HAHA (and mice that are avoiding them )

Woke up this morning to a nice email from my aunt and some amazon vouchers for our wedding anniversary - we had forgotten about it . So now we have the hard task of finding a film to go see on the 27th and thinking of something to get from amazon, DH has ruled out baby items so I'm at a bit of a loss as you can imagine it's a bit of a switch to think of something for us (nursing bra's don't count).

wtw ((hugs)) no ides what to say but with all luck I will be joining you on that emotional rollercoaster soon . Just don't let anyone else tell you how to feel and don't be guilty about any of it.

moomins hope you are feeling healed after that stitch, so glad they are looking after you

blitzy and Fan Really hope things get easier soon for you both.

sorry if I've missed anyone take care

Hello, I have seen this http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/international-dates/august-19th-day-of-hope Day of Hope a few times on FB today, and it seems right to share it here, especially for those of us who have families and friends who find it difficult to speak about our beautiful children,...

August 19th is about honouring and remembering the lives of babies and children that could not stay with us. By doing this we are speaking out about the death of babies and children.

August 19th is a day to break down the walls of society that keep pregnancy, infant and child loss a hush hush subject. People view the death of a baby as just a sad thing that happened. These babies that die are not sad things that happen. They are people, much loved and wanted children. They are brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, grandsons and granddaughters.

August 19th is about openly speaking about these children and celebrating their short lives.

By having this special day once a year we get people speaking about pregnancy, infant and child loss. And by doing this we break those walls down so that people are not afraid to speak about these children anymore.

With love to you all, your angels, rainbows and your families, from Mia and me. xx

drat, here's the real link Day of Hope

Thank you all for thinking about me yesterday. We got through it. Just as sad today, but I feel very different. It is a new chapter, but the same book and Dexter will always be part of my story.

I hope your day passes peacefully first. I spent the day crying while painting, crying while walking the dog, crying while tidying the office and crying while doing chores. You will get through it, even though it is sad, and we are all here for you.

Two weeks trickle! forever and no time at all. I hope nothing exciting happens and it is boring as all heck

WTW Your littlest one is just beautiful. I have no experience, but I am not surprised she has stirred up emotions. So much joy and love, but also thinking about what could have been. Thinking about you.

Fan glad you are feeling better.

Elly I am on the clearblue trial, but am defering starting it for a month. Until after my op basically. AF started yesterday as well, worst possible day for that I think! But that is now three I have had in three months, and just from temperature taking I think I am ovulating. So looking at that as good news. Glad you got a :) Hope you enjoy your busy weekend!

The Day of Hope link Mias has put up is just lovely. I don't tend to talk about Dex much on facebook but I did share one of her pictures today. I love her sunset name and butterfly pictures too.

Thinking of everyone, even if I haven't name checked. I really did appreciate all the messages from people thinking about me. More than I can say. xx

We stopped at the churchyard yesterday on our way home, wanted to have a look at the plants we'd planted on Sterre's birthday 2 months ago. When I got there, they were all gone... :( The gardener had just done the grass and he just mowed over the whole of Sterre's plot... DH said they might grow back, but I'm not sure. Think we might need to get a flower pot to put things in so they don't get ruined.

Looking forward to a week off and my birthday on Thursday :)

Thinking of all our little miracles on this Day of Hope x

Oh Blue I'm sorry :( That must have been so upsetting to see. What plants had you planted there? I hope they grow back for you, lots of plants do I think. I know nothing about gardening however!

blue what type of plants were they? And where abouts on the grave had you planted them?

fan we had planted 3 aubretias, right under her memorial stone. It wasn't that there was a big space inbetween the stone and the plants, he could have just gone round them both.

I wonder, does he only mow every month? If the grass is very long he may have cut them accidentally. I'm not sure if the will come back. Is there a head strip that you can plant in? If not then a pot is your only option, unless you expose the earth around the stone and create a little flower bed that you can tend, if you do that regulary then the gardener is unlikely to cut them. Some people do that in our grave yards.
Maybe have a word with him about what you can and can't do, I know some grave yards are strict about what you can do to the graves.

Thank you Mech glad you got through Dexter's day. I found It very strange when we went past Erin's due date. Big hugs xx

Oh Blue that must have been so upsetting. I hope you can find a solution. I know how important our little ones graves are xx

Thank you for the link Mias I also shared the picture. I find it a nice gentle way to let all my friends and family know we'd like Erin acknowledged - I'm also heartened to see what lovely messages people post when I put something about her.

I know it's only Facebook but it felt quite poignant to have a beautiful message about Erin in amongst all the photos and congratulations about Holly. Kind of representative of our life now - utter joy mixed always with sadness and loss.

How is everybody? xxx

Love to all our angels on this day of hope Georgie , I miss you more than you ll ever know.... Love u darling sweetheart xxxxx wish you were here with Phebs xxxxxx

Morning all. I have been up since the crack of dawn, it seems - feels like lunchtime already. Stupid family stress again, means I can't sleep too well. Not that I sleep that well anyway.
On the plus side, depending how my cycle goes, I may ov sometime this week...

wtw it's so nice to hear from you. As I think I said before - I can only imagine the mix of emotions - and as others have said, I hope you and your DH (and K) feel able to just let it unfold. I think we all know that there's no point fighting grief. It is independent of us, and not always predictable.
moomins how are you feeling today?
Also first and mecha - hope you are both ok.
Thank you for the lovely link miasmummy.
Am so for you blue about the plants on Sterre's grave. It must have been awful to discover what had happened. Good advice as ever from resident gardening expert fan...

Oh... . Life can just be really crap, can't it.
And to top it all off, I'm not even eating sugar or drinking alcohol at the moment (fertility-related). So no chocolate or cake or wine or gin&tonics. At my time of greatest need!!! Not, I hasten to add, that I would be eating boxes of chocolates and drinking at nine a.m. anyway. At least I hope not

Arse and buggeration. Holly has lost 12% of her birthweight so we are on our way back to hospital with her My milk has only just come in today but I'd been hoping she was getting enough from the colostrum but obviously not

Oh whatever, sorry to hear that. Now that you milk has come she should start to beef up. I hope you are ok? X

Oh no - I'm so sorry. I don't know what they usually do, if you will both need to stay in or not... I just hope that all is well as soon as it possibly can be and that she is absolutely fine to go back home asap. Also that she feeds brilliantly, now that your milk is in. Thinking of you x