The BESH Fillies Are Under Starters Orders

[CaveMum]

Welcome to the 2.30 from Mumsnet Towers. The fillies have been groomed to within an inch of their lives and are raring to go.

Late entries for the race are required to locate and fill in the BESHtionnaire so that their form can be assessed.

Bring on the stallions!

Bastarding fuckwit clinic pleb won't let me get my bloods done. Apparently it has to be on cd1. Even though last cycle was 77days. Oh no, that bit in the letter about irregular cycles more than 6weeks just getting them done randomly is wrong. And the "no bloods within 8 weeks and you're kicked off the list" is also wrong, and of course that won't happen...

Cocking minion. Why does it matter to her is my bloods "are less accurate than we'd like". My fecking body isn't working as well as I'd like.

Annnndddd, breath.

Sorry about the green pant snot bugs

Knob jockeys. The lot of them. (not you bugs)

Hola
Only a short one as hiding in loos at work
Fecking bastard twatty droid just arrived unannounced and 4 days early. Beyond

I guess it's better out than in. Though it's a cold comfort.

hilarity, that is beyond ridiculous! Absolute fuckers. Hang on while I get my riding whip.

Do I ring tomorrow, hope I get someone else, and lie about my last period?

Argh! I'm an honest person- I resent them making me lie. There is no option. Bugger waiting an indeterminate number of days. Do I wait till a reasonable, 28 day cycle then ring though? (having never had a 28 day cycle in my life, I can't see how this would be any more accurate)

Argh!

camel, I'm pounding the crap out of your droid. It's the only hope to get my blood pressure down and stop me swearing..

bugs it's probably something dislodged by last night's activities, but if it continues, off to the dr with you.

sinking the additional stress caused by this kind of nonsense really winds me up. See also, having to book a HSG between end of period and ov, but not letting you book in advance if you have regular cycles, lost referrals and general admin crapness. Grrr.

sinky grrrr what a bunch of fuckwits. In your situation I would be tempted to lie but would it be worth calling again to shout reason with them again? for you.

Also about camel's droid . And sorry that your body is still being awkward, bugs - keeping an eye sounds like the right thing - would be rotten luck to get an infection too.

That's a lot of anger! Off to needles lady in an hour - maybe she'll calm me down.

Just popping in to say hi to those I know. And hi to those I don't! It's been a long time....still not diffed . But I have lost my dildocam virginity, so that's something. Dye in the toobs next - I can hardly wait.

A special punch in the ribs to ma hags Cavey, Norf and Faith.

sinks that is so fecking unreasonable of them. Proper case of computer says no. Fecking jobsworths. Definitely lie. You need these tests doing. Might need to come clean when results are being interpreted though as assume it will make a difference in what they tell you if you're not actually on cd1...?

bugs hope the ectoplasm clears up! You're right to keep an eye on it. Maybe you could start a blog? That would put the baby-dust brigade right off!

All - thanks for kicking the shit out of droid. I think I'm going to have to start threatening R2's family if I'm ever going to get it to bend to my will. you will submit you bastard-faced-robot- wanker

Heh camel. Am imagining the BESH in a reservoir dogs stylee..

Have calmed down a little. Am going to ring again after a reasonable, for me, 35 day cycle. Or maybe a little earlier... Shall still harrumph indignantly about being denied another dildocam (what do you mean I said, just last night, I didn't want another? Lies, all lies)

And got a parking ticket tonight. For having a staff permit while parked in the staff car park. Sigh. I'm surrounded by imbeciles.

The way I'm feeling today I could happily strap someone to a chair and elaborately chop off an ear....

Where has all this rage come from? Maybe is a side effect of being barren and ancient????

Well done for making the grown up decision re tests. Keep us posted re how you get on

sinky, not your day is it? Can you talk to anyone else? When I talked to a practice receptionist about my smear she was very vague saying it had to be a special clinic and they couldn't do my asthma review at the same time?! I couldn't sort it with drippy woman to fit around fertile period/post ov so I gave up. Rang back later in the week, booked in no problem and the nurse did my asthma review quickly afterwards some people are obsessed with the rules, some people are flexible!

Well done faitharama sounds like project BMI is going really well. I'd promised myself that if I wasn't up diffed this cycle I would spend 2 weeks doing some serious exercise to kick start a new healthy regime. Now I'm back on CD1 I'm just not sure I can be arsed (as evidenced by the fact that I'm sat here scoffing a magnum and drinking luffly pink wine)

Really pleased for you re op date. So nice to have light at the end of the tunnel. Remind me what they're doing to you again...?

It was suggested that I pop my head in here...

Fresh blood?

But of course, where are my manners?

Hello there kick. We've all been mighty impressed. I have to admit I'm a little disappointed at didn't all totally kick off, but meh, it was fun while it lasted.

Find your self a BESHtionnaire, we'll pull up our steeds and start pouring the shots.

Bwaaahahahaha why thank you

So erm...what does BESH mean?

rierierierierierie! I miss you, you selfish caaaah, failing to share The Magic That Is You around properly. Did you enjoy dildocam, at any rate?

Hello ariel! I recognise you from my lurking days. Am assuming your fanjo cam showed a pretty picture, yes?

Also hello to guru. Get your ass back here once you've googled what BESH stands for.

Ooh, hello kickassguru! I did like your mardy style. BESH is Barren Evil Selfish Hags. I think it came from a Daily Mail article some years ago. I suppose we should have subtly checked your age, as technically it was for 30something TTCers who'd been around for a while. But we've had a few late 20s recently, so what the hell. The barren grumpiness is the thing.

Current theme is horse racing, so grab yourself a horse, obsess about your headgear if you're sinky, who still hasn't recovered from the loss of her feathered ceremonial Hat Of Office in the last fred and crack on with the BESHtionnaire for us to assess your racing form. I think it's in the first post on this thread.

Is it "Bradley/Basic Environmental Science And Humanities"

Or knives?? ;)

Oh f* maybe not

I'm 30 now... Does that count???

We are Bitter Evil Selfish Hags - as dubbed by the DM, generally womenz in our 30s who are having difficultly winning a baybee because we waited too long for the sake of our careers

Yes indeed. We know something of your spirit but if you search for the BESHtionnaire in search from the last couple of months you should copy and paste and put your own answers in :)

Thanks for the encouragement knockknees! I luff project BMI that's sticking! Yes I have a date and a double goal to aim for now. I'm tired tonight but in a 'got fresh air' kind of way. They are planning a cystoscopy - sticking a camera up my wee-wee hole to find a suspected blockage with a view to removing said blockage. Will be day case but will need a couple of days at least post-anaesthetic to get back to work, longer if they have to pop a stent in (worst case scenario). Actually maybe worst case scenario would be them not finding anything at all?!

Being 30 now is fine. It's not a hard and fast rule. Filling in a BESHtionnaire is though!

Just realised I am 30 now......but only for another month