The BESH Fillies Are Under Starters Orders

[CaveMum]

Welcome to the 2.30 from Mumsnet Towers. The fillies have been groomed to within an inch of their lives and are raring to go.

Late entries for the race are required to locate and fill in the BESHtionnaire so that their form can be assessed.

Bring on the stallions!

That's a bit harsh, isn't it sink?? Given how rubbish the post is!

Morning BESH, apologies for absence [hands over note from my mum].

HWHNN got back on Saturday morning, so we had a catch up on things. We managed the sechs on late Saturday afternoon, and judging by my temps I think [crosses fingers] I might have ov'd. My base line hasn't appeared on my chart yet because I've not had 3 days of "up" temps but I am hoping we might have timed it right.

sinky, that's crap. Can you give them a call to say you didn't get the form till Saturday? Do you have any letters from your GP re previous tests/smears etc? They should have your NHS number on them.

Faith, you were, sort of, in my part of the world

Euro, how are you feeling today? Did you have a good chat with your friend?

I can't stop scratching!!!

Some wee beastie has decided to turn me into a walking buffet over the weekend and I've got 12 huge bite marks on my legs and stomach I react really badly yo insect bites and the like - they go bright red and blistered. That god it's cool enough to wear trousers today otherwise people might think I've got leprosy or something!

I think the beastie was in my bed so I've stripped that down, hoovered the mattress and then flipped it over. I checked the cat for fleas and she's all clear, so I'm hoping it was a one off.

[tapes oven gloves to hands a la Phoebe from Friends]

I hate that cave. I tend to be the main meal in my house as well; if there's something to bite a human, I'm the one that gets bitten!!

[giggling at the thought of you taping oven gloves to yourself]

Morning.

Norfy the afternoon with diffed friend was nice. She is suffering terribly with bloated feet and ankles, poor thing. She is having literally to keep her feet up at the moment (elevated on several cushions). I had a good whinge about the drugs (she had no side effects but overstimulated - my experience does not seem typical). For obvious reasons I didn't mention my menkulling about not wanting a baby to come out of the process.

cavey good work on the timing. The oven gloves really set your outfit off well.... I react the same way to insect bites. It has only started in the past couple of years though. Before that, I just used to have a standard reaction. And in Belize this year, when I was on the steroids to suppress my immune system, I reacted normally again. You have my sympathy with the itchy blisters though.

Oh bugs I have just seen your post. Hugs. Take care of yourself. Remember, it ain't over until the fat lady sings and at the moment I have said fat lady bound and gagged and locked in the stationery cupboard.

Bugs I'm so sorry. I'm here rooting for you and little slug and, like euro says, it ain't over till the fat bird shows up.

Don't care if it is un-BESH-like, have a massive (((((hug))))) from me.

I'm sorry this is happening bugs. I think you're totally right to be off work. Ok it's not about the physical but mentally, could you give 100% to your job?! If not then its ok to stay at home til you know what's happening. It's preparing for the 'what ifs' as well as the reality. Did you get a scan?

Oh this is just so shit and unfair. Whoever is up there handing out baybees needs retraining quick sharp.

I had my downreg scan today. Everything looked good - both ovaries quiet and lining thin. However, they then said I couldn't start the stimms until Saturday (to fit in with their collection timing) and I lost the plot (not shouting and screaming but in my head). It's absolutely inhumane to keep someone feeling like this for an additional week for the convenience of the clinic's diary. So anyway, on the basis of that, we decided to stop this awful process now. Then they came back to us and said they could move us forward to starting on Wednesday. I know I could drag myself through another couple of days of this shit, but both of us had actually felt such relief when we had taken the decision to stop, I think we will anyway. Mr euro had to go back to work, so we will talk about it again tonight, but I think the decision is made. I have never felt as bad in my life as I have in the past two weeks. I just can't believe that anything good can come out of this awful process at this point.

We have the formation of a plan B - the rest of the immunology tests with Gorgy over the summer during which time we take a couple of months off. In the autumn, we have a holiday and maybe try an iui. Then in about 6 months, we might try a mild version of ivf, with no downregging. I've just got home and spent the past 20 minutes crying my eyes out (for the first time in this process). It was relief, I think.

That's hit the nail on the head, Bugs. I hate feeling out of control. I was explaining to the diffed friend I saw yesterday how out of touch with my body I felt. I used to know that I would get my period, the on about CD4/5 my ovaries would start twinging and do this on and off for a week or so. Then I would ov on day 14 from the right side and day 16 from the left side and then a few days after that I would get little cramps and then the next week the shivers would start and my period would arrive. Now there's nothing. I don't think she got it because she had never had normal cycles and spent years on the Pill to control her PCOS.

I used to like my life. Now I feel I am just exisiting rather than living. I don't even feel broody any more (although that might have something to do with all my hormones being switched off by the drugs). It's just miserable.

Did I say that about the wheelie bin? I don't remember posting that at all.

Glad you're feeling some relief Euro - it sounds like these evil drugs have really taken a toll on you. I hope they are quick to leave your system.

Fingers all crossed (and Fat Lady muzzled) for your 9am scan Bugsy

Well done on the timing Cavelina!

Have been keeping my head down and hoping for the best. Slogging through the PhD is helping a tiny bit with the menkul...

I know the wheelie bin comment of which you speak, Bugs - I think it might have been Cavelina ?
(I giggled when I saw it...and then promptly felt very about those insta-diffments for people who aren't even trying and will probably be shit parents )

[embarrassed] okay, so TOM and I weren't "actively" ttc the month we got our much wanted lucky win but we weren't doing it over a wheelie bin!

-fail!

T'werent me your honour! I'm not a wheelie bin style lady

Euro I'm sorry the clinic messed you about. If you have decided this is what you want, and you do "sound" more positive IYKWIMZ, then you have to take this path.

Bugs, I'm still crossing all fingers/toes/arms/legs/eyes that the scan will have good news for you tomorrow.

:( sorry its been such a rough day euro and bugs.

bugs I'll be praying for no more menkul inducing stuff coming out and a sticky growy bean tomorrow.

euro if you're relieved then it sounds like the right choice. At least for now...

God, what a horrible headfuck all this is. Sorry that so many ESH are having a shitty time at the moment. Will be thinking of you tomorrow, bugs, if you do go ahead. I suspect knowing either way will help you feel more in control than otherwise...

CD25 here and I think droid is on its way. Boo. And the weather forecast is shit. I might just jack it all in and run away to somewhere sunny .

I too feel like I am existing, not so much from a TTC perspective but with being ill. Barely keeping my head above water. The concept of my secondment ending in September fills me with a combination of relief and horror what else might befall me if I leave this post?!

It ain't over Shreddie...holding out hope for you.

Oh lord, we're a sorry bunch aren't we. I prescribe copious amounts of gin and malteasers, to be taken 3 times a day.

I'm currently self-medicating with Pringles.

Would like Droid to fuck off now so I can get back to shagging like rabbits.

I've been cleaning which I find pretty therapeutic :) my Mum would be proud! And eating a bit of chocolate!
Pain is bad because idiot me forgot to take painkillers on time so I've unpacked yet another box! Watching girly tv in bed while MSB is in the living room.