The BESH Fillies Are Under Starters Orders

[CaveMum]

Welcome to the 2.30 from Mumsnet Towers. The fillies have been groomed to within an inch of their lives and are raring to go.

Late entries for the race are required to locate and fill in the BESHtionnaire so that their form can be assessed.

Bring on the stallions!

I'm sorry cavey, just ignoring your woes in order to get attention for mine. Bastard fucking pantsnot at the wrong fucking time.

I know. And I was just envying you your nice near cycle, hen you said droid was nearly gone. And so my body promptly rewarded me with a nice 29 day cycle of my own. Hurrah!

How are you feeling now, sweetie?

Wollow (wallow???) away Norf, we all get tied up in our own "issues" [tries to sound like a cheery US-style therapist]. Tis understandable. Besides, I'm just ignoring (as much as I can) my situation until I see the consultant. 11 days to go!

Yes 29 say cycke is pretty civilised! I'm alright. House is really coming along and I'm really pleased with how my short bursts of cleaning are working out. I'm also not taking on stuff at work just because everyone expects me too - I'm making other people share responsibility! So I'm feeling a lot better about things that I was struggling with. So that's good!

I said to MSB about not TTC and he said it wouldn't work! I do think I won't use the ov sticks though.

Well done, fifi. You are doing so well at being cheerful and getting on with things, after everything that's been thrown at you recently.

I think it helps that my pain is under control. Lurking but manageable.

Currently my main issue is the feeling of needing to wee with nowt coming out

Morning BESH!!

Droid is well and truly here bugger so I'm out for this month. Not entirely surprised given how stressful work is at the mo and I'm absolutely knackered.

Feel absolutely crap due to exhaustion and bloody hay fever and I'm going to my friend's baby shower tomorrow. I'm not too jealous yet because they were trying for quite a while before they won their baybee and I've not been trying long enough to be entitled to be jealous yet. But still, going to be weird.

Hoping cramps are not too bad today, otherwise I may kill one of the students

Bollocks. I'm sorry al.

Bloody hell BESH, are you synching up or summat?! I know all the stuff about wimmen in the same office/house getting in synch together, but on a t'interweb forum too??

Sorry about droid Aly [sends Frankel to double barrel droid]

Weird innit?! Next step synced BFPs! :)

Sorry the Droid got you allypally. That sucks big time

I managed to wee but only after a pint and a half so was up 3 times in the night . Feel alright ish now though but must keep hydrated today. I'm so glad it's nearly the weekend! First lie in for MSB and me together on a Saturday in about 7 weeks! Got biscuits and bacon to treat ourselves :)

I must have gone to the loo about 10 times last night. It was most annoying. Only topped by the twats next to me playing guitars and violins at 1.30am.

Morning ladies. The synching is odd. Apparently groups of women synch to make it easier for cavemen to sh@g them in some giant ovulation-fuelled orgy. Be afraid, ladies, be very afraid.

I am feeling slightly better today. I'm not sure if that is because the drugs are having less effect as I get used to them or because we are going to discuss stopping the IVF at the weekend and I feel relief at that prospect.

BTW, IVF droid is minging. It started off pretty normal for the first few days but now I have a load of nasty brown sludge. Eugh. This is particularly inconvenient because although the downregging drugs are likely to kill libido, I am dying for a sh@g! I guess there had to be one side effect from the long list that I didn't get...

Stopping right now, euro? Or you mean finishing the cycle and then leaving it?

Whatever the reason (possibly including dwelling happily on a caveman orgy), I'm glad you're feeling better.

I keep reading caveman/men as "cavemum"
! I was about to launch into a passionate argument that I am not a hussy!

Euro you have to do what is best for you.

Norfy yes, stopping now. When I confessed that I was hoping the IVF wouldn't work, he suggested stopping (which I had already been considering). We were only ever planning to do one cycle of IVF.

In reality, I expect we will go through with it now we have come this far, but we will talk it over more at the weekend.

Hello BESH

euro glad you're feeling slightly better love. If even the prospect of talking about stopping makes you feel more positive then it sounds like you're on the right track. FWIW I think there are some things that happen in life that make you feel so powerless that even just the act of acknowledging there IS another option can make the situation seem a bit brighter. You never know, you might feel so much better having agreed with KFZK that you could stop that you don't actually need to IYSWIM. Anyway. Whatever feels right has got to be the best answer for you

Hola to everyone else.

Feeling pretty bloody chipper after yesterday's doom and gloom. Have had fantastic 'date day' with HY and it's just been lush. Such a treat to spend grown up time together just being a couple. Have loved every minute of it.

Right enough gushing. He's off to his Pre Stone Roses Gig Drinkathon in a minute so I'm going to attack the piles of shite under the spare bed. Ooooh I do love a good clear out.

That's exactly it I think Camel. He said last night that I looked happier since we had talked about stopping. The odd thing as that since that conversation, i feel more inclined to carry on for the diagnostic value. I am a very mixed up eurochick at the moment....

euro do you feel like with the IVF all the control has been taken from you? They dictate when you do the drugs, stimming, down regging etc. before, you could chart, use ov sticks etc, you had the control. So maybe by saying you'd like to stop, it makes you feel like you've taken control. Even if your ultimate choice is to continue with the IVF, it's what you've chosen rather than what's been dictated? Am I close to the mark?

I think you probably are,faif. I am never good when I feel like I have been backed into a corner. That's what led to my freak out when I was supposed to start IVF a few months ago. I called up as agreed to tell them my period had started and then next thing I knew, a big box of drugs was being delivered to my house and a couple of weeks later I was supposed to start and I felt rushed and panicked.

I also miss feeling in touch with my body . I knew its rhythms and what to expect next and all that has been taken away and replaced by a load of synthetic bollix.

If you were to continue, how much longer would it be to finish this cycle?

I don't swear much but TFI Friday! I am fed up at work. I am frustrated and don't feel supported by my manager :( I have requested a meeting so I can do my return to work (never had one even though I was off sick for 7 weeks and have now been back for 6 weeks and have had another episode in between). Just happy to have two days off to chill out now! What's everyone up to this weekend?

faif it depends on how my body reacts. I have a scan on Monday. As I understand it, if my ovaries are asleep and my lining is thin, they will tell me to start on stimms alongside the downregging drugs (hopefully a lower dose). I think most people are on both for about 10 days or so. Then you take the trigger shot and have egg collection, then it is just progesterone until BFN or 12th week of pregnancy of it works. So if all goes as it ideally should, I have around 2 more weeks of the downregging/stimming drugs. Which normally wouldn't seem like a long time but at the moment feels like an age.

Bugs I never had much in the way of reasons. It was pure hormonal broodiness that made me want a baby. Today I am feeling more resigned to going through with this to see what happens but I still feel strongly that I don't want to get pregnant this way so the potential "prize" of winning a baby is not driving me.

Quiet evening in the stables.are we all bedded down for the night?

My woo CD arrived today so I'm off to listen to it now. Will report back in the morning.