Just MC and ready to try again? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Come on down to the mosh pit for some serious metalling and cake overindulgence

[WhyAlwaysBoris]

Continuation of the last thread.

There's cake for scoffing, backs for patting, and screeching death metal for all your metalling moments. All welcome so come on in and get settled into the plush sofas!

Dictionary:

So settle into the mosh pit, we have special VIP area's for those on the 2WW, the new bumps metalling with segregated areas for the first/second/third trimesters and the club class cocktail bar for those who have just got AF and can get-pissed let loose for the first two weeks!

Jaffa hang on in there, only a few days to go till the MW.

Thanks for offer of info on HCG, might pick your brains on thursday, really kind of you to offer when you have got enough on your plate this week.

I've been thinking about your scan, is there anyone else you could take with you? sounds like it might be good to have some moral support whilst you are waiting to be seen? If not do you have a clever phone? Maybe we could all be on the internet with you ?

leedy good luck for tomorrow. Will be thinking of you.

Jollyb welcome, sorry you find yourself here but there are lots of lovely ladies here to support you.

GPB sorry if my fury with Croydon Uni Hosp has worried you. I'm sure there has had to be a lot of bad luck involved too.

Martha :) :) at being all official now with her appointment booked.

Mumtum thinking of you this evening. Hang in there.

x post with Jaffa oh those numbers give me some hope
Thank you for thinking of me when you have got your own metalling to do x

boris i read your other OP and you have been treated dreadfully, and it seems they are being less than enthusiastic now i just wanted to come on and hold your hand through to Wednesday/Thursday and am sure that this is a little 'slow burner'

and dont apologise for the mememe - you need to let off steam. x

thanks Martha

Boris so sorry you've got such an agonising wait - but it's not necessarily bad news, as others have said. I have no knowledge of hcg levels so no words of wisdom but I have my fingers firmly crossed for you.

Jaffa I'm 15+5 and I've only felt the baby move in the last couple of days - and even then I'm not completely sure that is what it was.

leedy good luck tomorrow. Hope you manage to sleep tonight.

jollyb welcome :) sorry you find yourself here, but it's a great support.

mumtum still thinking of you - hope you are doing ok xx

Evening ladies.

Oh boris I'm sorry to hear you have been having such a tough day. Will keep my fingers and toes crossed for Thursday.

How are you holding up Mumtum? Just letting you know I'm thinking of you.

Welcome JollyB I found this thread last week, so it's good to have another newbie around, just wish it was under better circumstances.

So, the sex strike is over . Although I could do with some advice as to when to test. Obviously I haven't had my first period since the EPRC, which was 3 weeks ago. So assuming I am miraculously back on a 28 day cycle (big assumption), I should be looking to test at the weekend?

I know I'm being wildly optimistic that I'll be pg first time round, but there is hope. I was very hormonal today at work and almost burst into tears over a text from my DH about the garden this is clearly a sign even though I never had such a symptom when pg with DD. I think I just need a date to work to so as to distract me. With DD and my MC I managed to hold off testing until my period was 2 days late, but I don't even know when that would be this time. Any suggestions?

hang in there boris, lots of positive comments to hang on to.

yikes thats why i liked it, its not glorified or ott its just right imo. the way its happy and upbeat then stopped abruptly.

Morning!

< lays out crispy bacon, poached eggs, baked hash browns with warm from the oven bread rolls and big jug of orange juice alongside the usual and coffee>

confused I was wondering the same thing... Unlikely as we've only dtd once (and I got bloody cystitis)

I'm working today - it's my subject's exam today so stress all round. Need some A passes from my seniors... Cross your fingers for a good exam for me!

Hope you're all ok, on my (not so) clever phone so will reply to you all when I get to a computer...

TMI warning if eating breakfast! Am on 2nd period since ERPC in Feb. Light so far, but pains during night that I thought were wind or water infection. Felt a rush getting out of bed and have just passed a hard tissuey blob the size of a large olive. Am bit freaked as I'm not late so assume not a new or chemical pregnancy but maybe leftover from op? Any advice? Thank you and sorry if making anyone want to puke!

dorita that sounds like what i had when i had my 'natural MC' as i have never had an ERPC i cant say but it sounds like (sorry for the terminology) leftovers

so anyway i would crack on this month!

Dorita -last year after my natural mc after 2 nd period due I had exactly the same thing but was never looked into ( sorry not much help) at the time we had a break from ttc so I tried to forget it. I didn't have any more after and haven't since either

Backward fingers crossed your seniors do u proud

Marbles thanks again for another yummy breakfast

Yikes intrigued though I am to listen to it right now for me I think it may send me overboard .... Promise I'll listen soon though

Boris I'm sure it's just a slow burner in there for you do fingers crossed u will be pleasantly surprised Thursday

Jollyb welcome to the thread sorry your here but these ladies are simply indispensable to me now I've found them I hope you will settle in too

Confused yay for the strike being lifted! As for the questions on when to test that's really tricky the first cycle after erpc or mc is called wtf for very good reason no one ever quite knows what's going on... Have you had a bfn since your mc to ensure all hcg was out if ur system firstly??? Next Have u had any signs of ov??? If so I'd try but probably fail wait till 12 dpo at least before testing... Sorry not much more advice than that ....

Kirsten yay for feeling movement that's great news

Marf how are you hun????

Jaffa after all the uncertainty you've been through already I'm sure your scan will be amazing but I second boris if u can find a rl friend to hand hold whilst in the waiting room i think you'd really benefit

Sorry to all others I've missed manda how's week 1 with a new born in the house going????

Me?? Still no bleeding or pain and still the scan image of perfectly formed sac and foetal pole in tact with no sign of collapse giving this niggling doubt that I just can't lose . I NEED absolute confirmation the bean stopped growing. I mean I need facts and figures here . Sizes and measurements compared to previous scan so i can see in no uncertain terms growth has stopped. so I called epu told a porky and said I'd had a little blood loss last night (deeply ashamed of self emoticon ) and I'm being rescanned today at 12. Yes I know it was wrong and I now have guilt to add to my list of emotions) as I may be taking up a scan appt which another lady mentalling may well need more than me but I'm selfish and immoral desperate to need to have that absolute confirmation before I can go through with the erpc tomorrow or I know will drive myself to insanity in future weeks and months always wondering what if just what if the previous scans were wrong. >

mumtum don't feel ashamed, you have to be clear in your head that you have had a mmc before your erpc or else you would torture yourself for life. Good luck.

mumtum, don't feel guilty at all - you need that scan for your peace of mind.

mumtum

Right, stop it. The shame and guilt, I mean. Here's the thing - technically you've manipulated the system with a small porky... BUT your reason for doing so it the dealbreaker for me: you're not just fancying a scan to have a peek, worrying things might not be ok when they probably are... you need to have confirmation that you're not about to make a huge, life altering mistake that could have awful consequences for your mental health in the long run. In that sense, the nhs would be failing to deny you that - it's a no brainer, if you want my opinion (and as I said, I actually feel you would be able to get one anyway being 'honest' with them but it may delay your treatment and I utterly understand how that's not fair either given how terrified I was that I would start to mc naturally in the time between discovering and inducing).

You're entitled to know this pregnancy really, truly isn't viable (if it isn't). And the nhs recognises this is an important thing to get right, hence them changing the recommendations on when to finally declare it's all over. Given that there was some change between your two scans, in your shoes I would absolutely need another scan too. You're not needing anything unusual.

Latest development in the manda household - DS's 1&2 developed temps of 38.8 and 39.8 respectively yesterday. It's either a reaction to the vaccine a week previous (quite common apparently) or the beginning of measles.

New baby is... compared to DS2, a dream. He sleeps lots. It's amazing!

mumtum think it is absolutely reasonable for you to get a scan. Will be thinking of you.

And leedy good luck on the NT today.

Not much help on the when to test on first TTC after MC as i was too scared to try that month, sorry, ladies.

Dorita, my first three AF after the MC were very strange, painful (TMI coming up) hard clumpy things. I had an emergency erpc AFTER labour and delivery so i'm pretty sure between these two things there can't have been a lot left up there, so i think it was just hormones etc having an effect rather than passing stuff from the mC iyswim. I found my periods after very painful and very upsetting. Hope you are OK.

I'm in a spot of bother this morning, ladies, can i pick your brains??

As some of you know I put up a thread asking what to do about the hospital and it has got a bit grown up this morning. Reporters and stuff . Gulp. (So i'm hiding in here where i feel safe)

All of a sudden the hospital suddently care! Funny that! The problem is that I'm pretty sure that the woman they have asked me to contact is the woman who i was in contact with about the lack of antenatal appointments (and the lying about whether i'd left messages) and she apparently didn't do anything.

After the MC i spoke to her for a second time (she rang me) and said that my complaint would be taken very seriously and we agreed she would send the results of the investigation to me via email so that i could read it on a strong day.

I never heard from her again. This really upset me as it was like me and my baby didn't matter to them.

I obviously can not be 100% certain as i never caught her last name but was the same first name in a senior role in same department, so seems pretty likely) . If it is the same person i don't want anything to do with them.

Obviously i don't want to write this on the thread as they have written this persons full name and if i'm wrong it would be a horrible slander.

At the same time i don't want to send in a complaint if it is going to get sent to her. I certainly wouldn't want a meeting with her as she hurt me dreadfully and i wouldn't believe a word she said.

At the same time i really, really need an apointment with the consultant to go through those test results.

What should i do?

manda lovely to have an update. I really hope it is a reaction to the vaccine and NOT the measles. xx

first of all mumtum i echo absolutely everything manda has said (eloquently as usual ) and the others on the thread, yes you have manipulated the system but so what? it is your body and if there is that glimmer of hope then i would do the same thing x

boris OMG, that is bizarre. I dont know what you 'should' do but, hang on i will read the thread first!

Thank u ladies for making my need seem less needy. Manda thank u to for taking the time to be so reassuring you put it into much better words exactly how I feel and when u have so much on presently I truly am grateful for your thoughts. I hope beyond hope you 2 ds's are purely having a reaction to the vaccine and wish them both a speedy recovery .

And to the other ladies thank u also I spoke with my mum this morning and she believes to that I need this scan for mg own peace of mind. ( I've previously suffered depression and had nervous breakdown in my 20s so am emotionally wobbly at the best of times) the forever wondering I know would just break me.

So on that note im off to the dreaded place of tears and doom epu to finally try and ease away those demons so I can be fully sure of my decision tomorrow.

X posts martha thank also . I know I was in the wrong to lie but I do need this.

why dont you contact her, and tell her how this has affected you.

incidentally has it made the news? i cant find anything..

mumtum No-one would begrudge you that scan, and no-one would judge you for getting it.

And sorry if this is inappropriate, (please forgive me if it is), but wanted to say in terms of mental health this, in my opinion, about as stresful and dreadful as life gets, and you have handled it with great dignity, strength and courage.

You are an amazing lady.

I hope it hasn't made the news, martha, i'm now hiding from the thread.
Obviously woudn't contact the journalist.

I don't want to contact her as if it is her i'd be sick if she suddenly took some interest just because the chief exec was breathing down her neck...sorry if i sound bitter and angry but i am, to be honest

of course you are and i dont blame you, you stay here with us

and that was a lovely message to mumtum i absolutely agree with boris

(can i just say that my cat is called boris and whenever i see your posts i imagine them sent by a black and white cat who looks like hitler )

martha i hope your cat has not got his eye on poland