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Just MC and ready to try again? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Come on down to the mosh pit for some serious metalling and cake

985 replies

MarthasHarbour · 19/03/2012 10:50

Continuation of the last thread.

There's cake for scoffing, backs for patting, and screeching death metal for all your metalling moments. All welcome so come on in and get settled into the plush sofas!

Dictionary:

So settle into the mosh pit, we have special VIP area's for those on the 2WW, the new bumps metalling with segregated areas for the first/second/third trimesters and the club class cocktail bar for those who have just got AF and can get-pissed let loose for the first two weeks!

The standard 'form' of the thread is the first one on in the morning brings the brekkie! Wink

And this will be a very special thread, it is the one where our first 'graduate' gives us our first bambino Go on IQ give us a twirl if-you can be arsed in your full term state

OP posts:
JaffaSnaffle · 24/03/2012 08:58

Pebs, my hospital had a 6 week policy on getting results back. Don't know if that is standard or specific to them. Very glad it went well for you yesterday. I hope you can spend some time quietly sitting in thd sunshine today, and that your body recovers soon.

Manda sorry you were so down. I hope it doesn't last. Thank you for the reassurance about the bug. I am only eating dry corn flakes and drinking ribena so not the most nutritious diet, but hopefully it will be short lived.

iq, thinking of you. I hope you are there, or nearly there at least. Baby IQ on her way! You have no idea how much thinking of you had cheered me up through the fog of this illness. Wishing you energy, calm and happiness! X

mrsnesbit · 24/03/2012 10:50

oh oh oh MY!
6 weeks today & absolutely no bleeding or pain......

BUT im swinging back to old ways. I am not hungry at all, off coffee, but just fancied one the other day, didnt have any decaf so immediately i thought "ahh fuck it, its all going to go tits up any way, im just going to have a full fat coffee".

The expectation is always there, its wedged within my psychie to assume, expect and wait for it all to end.
I hate that.

WhyAlwaysBoris · 24/03/2012 11:06

Morning everyone!

I.Q. How exciting! Your baby is such a bright beacon of hope to me. Can't wait for the announcement.

Manda so sorry you are in a blue phase. They just seem to come upon me like craters in the road i just fall down without warning. I hope it passes quickly.

Jaffa poor you. I hope you feel better soon, you must be shattered after nursing duties first. I hope someone is now looking after you.

pebs glad that the GA was ok. My results took 9 weeks, but i think that was more due to the consultants availability to see us as i noticed on the forms that the PM was done at the end of january and the results of the tests written up 2 weeks later, so they actually took about 5 weeks to come back. Maybe if i'd have protested about the wait we could have got them sooner, i dont' know.

leedy Test!

stela hope the gp went well. They seem reluctant to test if the babys don't make it to the second trimester until you have lost three- apparently two is still 'normal' and doesn't mean there is an underlying problem. A friend of mine who is a consultant recently told me that in the NHS "It is the squeaky hinge that gets the oil". ie complain more and don't be fobbed off. I'm the sort of person who tends not to do this and just apologise for being any trouble, but i'm beginning to see that whether i like doing it or not, she is right about that and no-one is going to ask for me.

Chelli and Champers so sorry you find yourself with us. In my experience this is the nicest club in the world, its just a shame it has such an absolutely shit membership criteria.

Hang in there. Re TTC in the WTF- one of the best bits of info i learnt here was to take PG tests after the MC until i got a clear negative to make sure that it was all definitely out of my system. If you don't get a negative them you might need a scan to check it has all gone/a second erpc to make your body ready to TTC.

Also, the first period tends not to be the usual cycle- mine was only a week late, some seem to be weeks and weeks late. As you don't know when to expect it, it can be confusing as you start to wonder if it is just late or you are PG again. If you got a definite negative first you can at least trust what PG tests tell you at this point, otherwise it would be gutting to get a positive, and then realise it is the after effects of the previous MC if that makes sense.

I've got AF this morning and find it v upsetting for some reason. I think during the PG I'd forgotten about the crushing disappointment of it arriving each month and then having to gear myself up to start thinking positive for the next month. It has made me realise i'm ready to have a go though, so i'll move myself from the loitering to the TTC section in the stats later.

My periods are much more painful now than before the MC. Real stabbing up the bum pains and cramps in my back i've never had before. Is this normal? does it stay like this or settle down after a bit (this is only my second one). May have to self medicate by sitting on the sofa watching rubbish and eating blue cheese, pate, and other banned in the latter part of cycle foodstuffs.

WhyAlwaysBoris · 24/03/2012 11:10

Mrs Nesbitt I seem to have written a mamoth post for some reason and in the meantime you must have written yours, so i missed it. Hello!

It took me a while to realise that as well as losing the baby i lost the innocence i had in the pG that i'll never get back, and that is such a precious thing to lose. Without it the whole process justs seems a nine month worry assault course. You are very courageous.

TitsalinaBumSquash · 24/03/2012 12:28

Afternoon :)

I have the dreaded "penny" taste in my mouth this morning and the only thing I can do to stop feeling sick is to eat, I predict a swift return to slimming world after this weun comes along.

Weekend at DP's parents house now, I predict a lot of sleeping.

GrandPoohBah · 24/03/2012 13:08

Morning All :)

How exciting that there's an actual real life baby on the way! Good luck IQ, I hope it's going ok.

Boris, I got those strange bumstabby pains after both my MCs, made worse when I tried to poo or sat funnily. Not fun, I always put it down to my cervix being bruised and sore, because it felt about that far in and tipped towards the back?

MrsNesbit, I got a little positive on weds, a proper one yesterday and I had two small flutes of prosecco with dinner last night. I'm also, as i type, in the process of drinking my way through a vanilla latte my lovely DH brought me back from playing football this morning. I think if I've learned anything from this process, it's that you can be really really really good - and it still makes no bloody difference to the outcome. We weren't expecting a pregnancy this soon after the MMC, so we're treating it like a 'bonus' one, no expectations until it sticks for a while. Clearly I'm not going to be silly but I've also decided that I Will Not Stress.

We'll see how that goes... I'm getting darker and darker lines on the ICs I'm doing, and I think I had some implantation bleeding. Fingers crossed.

GrandPoohBah · 24/03/2012 13:09

Oh, and Tits - I will be mostly on the sofa asleep today too. I'm looking forward to it.

MissCoffeeNWine · 24/03/2012 14:08

Hello everyone I haven't got time to chat really but just wanted to say fingers crossed baby IQ has made a happy and easy entrance into the world. The whole long labour thing is completely outside my experience, so I don't know when's realistic to update - or will they let you in hospital? But I hope we hear soon IQ xxxxx

MandaHugNKiss · 24/03/2012 15:24

I do hope IQ MrIQ and MiniIQ are all enjoying those precious newborn snuggles right now.

And I hope the same for all of us in the near future x

PieMistress · 24/03/2012 16:24

Lurking for IQ news! Off to Center Parcs tomorrow breaking up the 7hr drive though and visiting friends on the way, there's no way DS would cope! (or us!)

Ditto what manda has said xx

champas · 24/03/2012 16:36

Hi club & hugs today

Just thinking about our mission, the chance of another preggy would get me through my loss , but it seems my DH is not like thinking as moi.

Im cut up & want to try again, but because it wasnt on our original plan to have no. 3 hubbie is not interested at all.

Im so hormonal trying to talk him round to my way of thinking- i dont know what to do

Any help out there what can i do.

twolittlemonkeys · 24/03/2012 16:45

champas no idea - my DH didn't want to ttc #3 for quite a while after my 1st MC he has now come round to the idea. :)

mrsnesbit I know how you feel - I just expect it to go pear-shaped.

whyalwaysboris my periods have been more painful like that since having DS2, not that I get them that often, but when I do, those stabbing up the bum pains are a killer!

As for me, during a metalling session the other day I bulk ordered a load of OV sticks and HPTs which arrived today. Hoping that ordering 15 of each will tempt fate into giving me a BFP so I don't need to use them. I think I heard somewhere that OV sticks are not reliable anyway if you're using fertility drugs, so I have probably thrown a few quid down the drain. Am SWIng anyway, even though I have no idea if/when I am going to OV.

pebspop · 24/03/2012 17:28

I am trying to plan for the future now but maybe you can help me with some questions and dilemmas:

Now that I have had three mcs I want to be referred to st marys rmc in London.this is the best miscarriage clinic in Europe with excellent success rates. I can only be referred by my consultant at the local hospital. I am not sure when I will see the consultant as at first they said I would see her in two weeks but after I requested the genetic testing on this last mc they said I would see the consultant when the results come back. I don't know how long this will take.

Do you think I could/should ring the consultant to ask them to refer me now as it will take a while to get my appointment at st marys or should I just wait until I see the consultant like a non pushy patient would!

I want referring whatever the results of the genetic testing come back with so I don't see the point in waiting.

Also, obviously I want to try again asap but I don't think you can turn up to st marys already pg. I might have to wait for a few months before I can try again as I will need a new load of tests doing. I am not sure if i like the sound of waiting but I don't want to get pg and have another mc when I could have been having good treatment in London. A few months wait won't kill me will it???

Does anyone know how long it takes to be seen at st marys. I could start off as a private patient as I don't mind paying if it is so good. Not sure if far is around but may be she could let me know how to get a private appoinment there

Any other advice about st marys will be welcome.

Midgetm · 24/03/2012 18:21

Quick post. Wait at St Mary's wasn't long but you can't have the tests if pregnant.

pebspop · 24/03/2012 18:44

Looks like I will have to wait then. Better to try once I have more information than risk another mc.

Might book a holiday!

WhyAlwaysBoris · 24/03/2012 18:46

Hi Pebs, hope you are Ok,

thought i'd send you the info on the clinics i was reading about.

From what i can gather st mary's brilliant if you have clotting/other issues, not so great if you suspect an immune issue as they don't test for 'killer cells' apparently-
I have been advised to choose between clinics based on what i think the problem might be ie clotting or immunology.

from the PM mine seems to be a clotting one so st mary's is the place.
DH and i have decided to have all the NHS test results come back first, and if they don't find the clotting, then refer ourselves privately to st marys for the teg as from some of the threads i have read it seems as though they will take the results of any previous tests you have had done on the nhs, so you don't have to pay for them all again.

I don't know if you have been given an indication either way about whether clotting or immunology?

Just in case the best immune clinic seems to be Mr Hassan Shehata, who is based at a nhs hospital in surrey (st helier), but has a private practice in harley street- Consulting Rooms 80 Harley Street, London W1G 7HW Private practice tel: 02084 019928 He does the killer cell tests apparently.

WhyAlwaysBoris · 24/03/2012 19:18

Also meant to say the reason st mary's don't do this test is because they don't believe in it. Treatment if found seems to be steriods and I have read several things by people saying 'nothing worked for me until the steriods' but lots of docs seem very sceptical. There is a good balanced article about whether it is worth investigating on the human fertility and embryology authorities website here
I have also found you can get the articles from the Oxford Journal of Human Reproduction online (they publish the actual academic studies so can be a bit hard going). They published the study st mary's did showing that teg shows up clotting issues that the standard tests don't find article here and their archive to search for stuff is here
I know i am obsessed but it is giving the illusion of having some level of control over the issue.

Midgetm · 24/03/2012 19:54

Borris is spot on. St Mary's doesn't believe there is enough evidence to support killer cells except that private treatment seems to work for some. If this pregnancy doesn't make it I have decided to go private with someone who does treat killer cells (I am coeliac so autoimmune conditions could be more likely with me). I have to say Ive found St Mary's a really good experience though so far. The first people who really examined all my conditions and gave me hope. They are so perky and positive it's catching.

leedy · 24/03/2012 21:26

runs into thread shrieking

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH BFP

runs off again

WhyAlwaysBoris · 24/03/2012 21:27

CONGRATULATIONS!

leedy · 24/03/2012 21:27

runs back in again

Er, I shouldn't immediately commence metalling because the digi test said 1-2 weeks and I think it should be just over 2, should I?

I am also EXHAUSTED LIKE UNTO DEATH.

WhyAlwaysBoris · 24/03/2012 21:29

I think the more experienced girls will be along shortly to give you a stern talking to about the digi test metalling. I seem to remember upthread someone saying they were the work of the devil for this reason.
Exhausted unto death, 'tis very good sign, surely.

JaffaSnaffle · 24/03/2012 21:33

Fab news Leedy! I have been popping on here every so often, ok quite often looking for good news from IQ, and now I have got some from you. You said you feel knackered and hormonal - these are good signs lady! Congratulations!

JaffaSnaffle · 24/03/2012 21:36

And I would be a big hypocrite to say anything about the digis, being a fellow user and metaller, but they are indeed the devil's work.

leedy · 24/03/2012 21:41

Aw, thanks everyone. I have just found a reassuring article for the metallers about the unreliability of the dating bit of Clearblue digis (your HcG levels are lower in the evening, who knew?), so I am going to ignore the weeks bit on it and concentrate on the pregnosity.

www.thealphaparent.com/2011/11/clearblue-digital-pregnancy-tests-who.html

It's funny, though, how much more aware I am this time round that this is just one step on the journey, not "definite child". Let the metalling commence...