Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum! Find your sea legs and sail on the seven seas in the BESH Pearl

[HaveALittleFaithBaby]

Argh, and be welcome to our new pirate Fred. Be finding yourself a parrot and a wooden leg and hop on board for the trip of a lifetime. Argh.
If ye be new and wantin' to join our motley crew, be filling in the BESHtionnaire application below. Argh.

1. Do you like gin? (This is compulsory, you must say 'Yes')

2. Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar?

3. Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use:
   a) weewee
   b) poopoo
   c) foofoo
   d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.

That's a "c", right there...

4. Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you:
   a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway.
   b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.

5. Is R2D2:
   a) an adorable robot from Star Wars.
   b) the source of all evil.

6. Number of pets?

7. Inappropriate (read: weird) crush of shame?

George Michael. He'd be off the drugs and on the straight and narrow ('scuse pun) if we ever met...

8. Lesbian crush?

9. What are your views on camping?

10. How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on?
    i) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it.
    ii) Over 100 quid
    iii) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks

Finally, tell us how you found the BESH and why you'd like to join us pliz.

I have no cats, but my parents have two. I am officially sulking!

Aaaarrrrr, the land where they be having a pirate party, if I be not mistaken!

Yes, Hereford would have been fab. If only I'd been a BESH then. Or indeed lived here then.

And in turn I love that you couldnt possibly go for a run without an iPod, just as a one off, lemon. Though a packed up dishwasher is deeply traumatic - perhaps a music-less run would have tipped you over the edge.

dotty, how unreasonable of your parents!

. Blimey, you're right drizzle. It's pretty messy down there..

I would luffs a cat dor but ghj is mucho allergic. I feel your pain.

Maybe the BESH could set sail for foreign type places, i feel a recurrence of the frenglish fred fun which I lurked on pre plucking up the courage to delurk gets Parrot Paul to squark hello to pony

It's early. How the eff do you spell scwark, scawlk, swarck? The noise parrot makes. Sigh.

Squawk.

Thanks

The Frenglish Fred was indeed fun. A nightmare with autocorrect though.

Back to the decks for scrubbing mateys, SB and me be washing-up before work. It is poxy and the stupid thing deserves a taste of the cat, although I fear it may be swimming with the fishes (which is so annoying, expensive and generally ARRRGGH).

Likes the BESHlove coming from the? norf. And I knew someone here would understand. One should not risk tipping oneself over the edge (oh and I discovered yesterday that the traumatising scales I met sometime in Feb were in fact broken, so surely I am not fat :) ).

Your mum is being NOT FAIR dot. I would love a cat but am allergic sadly. And SB is not keen, so it won't happen...

How's work, faith? Hope you're okay!

How is the diffedness J&B? Nearly a PESH yet?

I lurked a bit on franglish (that looks like frangipane - hmmm, no need for a diet now!) and it was highly entertaining.

I feel bloody awful. Stupid, stupid idea to come back to work. They've made me work on the ward cue lots of running round and so I can't just leave :( also it'll mean too episodes of sickness. my temp is 37.8 with paracetamol. I need to go back to the quacks.
nice to see you on our ship.
I can't run without music other. It's too dull.

Oh. Out of nowhere I think droid is appearing. Not a single symptom. Just a splodge of, you know, droidness. I suppose a tiny glimmer of light is that that was a 44 day cycle - a vast improvement on the 70 something of last time. But mostly I am DEPRESSED.

faithy, how rotten that you struggle back an they promptly set you off doing something really guaranteed to wear you down. How long till you can go home?

ARRRGGHHH at faith's work. So sorry you feel rubbish and stupid/evil people that made you run around wards when clearly you should be at home watching shite movies.

As far as I know bugs is sechsing on cue of the first OPK considered sufficient. Tomorrow morning will just be a bonus for GP. Oh and how are you going to explain you baybee's distingtly piraty and insane looks, since you've been with The Captain again.

I feel justified that faith also won't run without music. I am going tonight. I really am!

Sorry about the droidal appearance norf. Make him walk the plank, let the fishes feast. GRRRR. Vaguely better cycles sounds like progress, although 44 is still a leetle on the long side. Have you been having tests/treatment/something (sorry newbie lagging behind here).

I am not finding fee in chat, I am not. I am stronger than that...

2 lines good, one line bad. Reminds me of Animal Farm (the George Orwell one, not the naughty sechy one)

Well done on the ov sticks bugs

Sorry you feel rubbish faith. Does your fred make you the most famous besh? I feel unworthy!

I can go in a minute. Finished on ward. Staffing was dire. No choice but to help but still
sinky Saturday I started a Fred ln chat and no-one replied I am vairy chuffed to have started a good one! bugs I imbd'd Grease 2 yesterday. When they started filming they hadn't even finished the script explains a lot! Love the choreography in it :)
Yes, get your ipod charged and go for a run lemons. Do it for me I'm missing it
north boo to Droid, yay to relatively short cycle. Have some rum to drown your sorrow.

Very exciting on the stick piss front bugs and if you got in there on the first positive day then that's the best time. Tomorrow morning would be a good time for an "insurance shag" too if you can manage it.

When are the new differs coming over to the Deli? I think I'm the only one left! In bump news I am having my baybee 3 weeks tomorrow. Aaaaaarrrggghhhh!!!!!!!! (unless he comes early that it)

Excellent shagging and ov stick coordination, bugs.

lemon, yeah, I've had over a year of Metformin, and my ovaries drilled. In every situation my body responds for a couple of cycles then shrugs and goes back to its own sweet way. Clomid next month, apparently.

Does anyone have great experience with ordering stuff online and getting free gifts? A clothes website i often use is offering a box of chocs to everyone who orders today. I know it is greedy of me, but what would happen if I ordered something, got the chocs and then returned the item?

Um, GP has referred me to hospital with suspected appendicitis....

Oh shit faithy i hope he is wrong and it is something considerably more minor than that. Fingers crossed for you and I hope you are better soon.

Oh my God, faith! Are you on your way there now? I hope it all gets sorted quickly and smoothly and painlessly. Is MSB there too?

Oh my God, faith! Are you on your way there now? I hope it all gets sorted quickly and smoothly and painlessly. Is MSB there too?

Yup I've been admitted, waiting for doc to see me. MSB is here.

Plague of boils next, is it?

Then the locusts?!
I can't work out if I'm not really that ill, or if I've been ill for so long cos it's been a fortnight that I've lost sight of what's normal! Pain is much worse since my GP poked me we'll see what the doc says.

No chance it could be an ectopic situation, is there? I know my mind just leaps to it in a paranoid way, but mention to them that you've had copious quantities of unprotected sechs recently. Even though the droid has visited (apparently it's not uncommon when the pregnancy is ectopic).